Eve & Lucy Ch. 03: Off set

I'm desperate to ask Lucy more about her coming out story, but maybe it's not something that you do, especially in public. What's the etiquette around this? So instead I ask her to tell me more about her job.

"Well, I'm leading on this pilot project to boost rape prosecutions and convictions. It's three pronged really: first off, we're trying to tackle institutionalised sexism in the police force and battle the victim-blaming that means rape reports are often ignored or dismissed." She leans forward, warming to her theme. "So, we've got training programmes for police officers, especially duty sergeants who tend to be the first point of contact for walk-ins. I've managed to recruit this ex-DI from Taunton to lead the sessions, which is great because they listen to him." Her voice drips with sarcasm. "The second angle is the courts, trying to fast track the process, allow video testimony. Often long wait times before things get to court lead to a lot of women withdrawing their testimony, often because they are pressured to do so." She sounds really passionate.

"Really?"

"Yeah, families can be really pushy, and if you live in the same area as your rapist, often the victims decide the social exclusion is almost worse than the crime."

"That must be the, like, third area then, right?"

"You'd think, but no, changing public attitudes isn't in my remit, sadly. Doesn't fall under the Ministry of Justice umbrella. No, the third area is jury preparation. This is the really controversial bit, because juries are just ordinary people so they bring all their prejudices and preconceived ideas about what rape is with them..."

"Like, she was asking for it wearing that skirt?"

"Exactly! Or, 'They'd had sex before, so of course he thought she'd be up for it,' or 'Why did she go home with him?' All that kind of victim blaming bullshit." She takes a big slug of wine. It seems like she cares deeply about this. I wonder how personal it is?

"Anyway, so what we're doing is - after jury selection - going through the law with the jury beforehand, explaining what is and what isn't rape. It's... well, some barristers have lodged complaints that it's coaching the jury. The cunts. The barristers, that is, not the jury. Though some of them can be cunts too." Another big gulp. "I mean, they have got a point. BUT, it's not like the jury is coming in neutral. Many of them don't know the law. If we were really serious about changing things we'd switch to a judge led system, like they have in Sweden, which, incidentally, has the best rape conviction rates in the world. But the jury principle goes back to the Magna Carta so it's a hard one to shake."

"I thought they were, like, discussing having judge-decided trials for, you know, like, big financial cases?"

She raises an eyebrow at me, as if she wasn't expecting me to have anything to contribute. I preen a little, anticipating a compliment. But, no. "Yeah, well, that's just about practicalities. The cost of those big financial cases run into the tens of millions and we can't risk them collapsing because Sandra from Leamington Spa can't understand the difference between options and warrants." She smirks at me. "That wouldn't give the taxpayer value for money now, would it?"

Our food arrives and we tuck in. A thought nags at me.

"But, like, why can't you start tackling society's attitudes? I mean, why can't that come under your, like, remit?"

"Well, it's about budget, isn't it? I've got 1.3 million to spend on this pilot, peanuts really, but it's all allocated. Police training, producing materials to share with juries, blocked off court time, barrister bookings, and so on. The money's effectively already spent. I mean, if we hit target, which we won't know for 18 months, then if I'm still on the project, it'll get rolled out elsewhere and we can build that in. I probably won't be though. I should make Grade 7 by next year, so I'll probably get pulled onto something else. Unless they keep me on it to do the National roll out."

I kind of want to ask about what Grade 7 is, but something is niggling at me. "The juries' material, like, is any of it, you know, videos?"

"Yeah. Quite a bit."

"Well, like, couldn't you stick that up on youtube? I mean, it might not get many hits, but, like, it won't cost you anything, right?"

She pauses and chews. "Yeah, fair point actually. I'll have the media unit check the rights agreement, but unless there are clauses in there preventing it, that's a good shout."

I'm warming to it. "Of course, it's all, like, tik tok and insta these days. I mean, that's like a lot of the audience you need to reach, like, in terms of educating young people on, like, you know, what rape means, what it is. Could help, you know, prevent a lot of it in the first place."

"Hmmm, yeah, but that wouldn't count in our stats. I mean, how do you measure something that hasn't happened? Anyway, I doubt our videos are tic tok or insta friendly." She waves a hand dismissively. "I mean, we deliberately had to keep them dry and play down the emotional content so we couldn't be accused of conditioning juries."

This feels like quitting, when it's something important. "Well, like, how about I make you some, like, shorts? 15 secs - this is what rape looks like. I could, like, get some drama friends together, wouldn't cost us anything, I mean we've got the gear and everything. You know, if you want to pay us out of like, petty cash or something, then, like, great, but this is important, you know?"

She looks at me indulgently, as if I've said something funny, but I push on. "Seriously, like, let me show you? We're really good. Come on, like, what are the top three myths about rape? Or, like, the top three things that stop women reporting rape?"

She leans back in her chair. "Hmmm. Well the biggest thing is fear of repercussions. That stops women reporting it and keeps many victims trapped in violent situations." She flaps her hands a bit. "Obviously, that's tragic, but actually when those cases come to court, getting convictions isn't that hard. Of course, we're working on better support for those victims, working through social services to try to get them to come forward sooner." She shifts forward to take a sip of her wine. "No, what I'm working on is those scenarios where many members of the public, and even some police officers, don't think that what happens is rape." She starts ticking things off on her fingers. "Getting raped during their sleep by a partner; lots of people don't think of that as rape. Unwanted anal is really common, especially amongst young people. Internet porn has a lot to answer for there. Then, of course, people being too drunk or drugged to give consent."

"Ok, yeah, like, easy, I can totally picture that." I can as well. "Um, like, imagine I'm, like, having sex, missionary position, camera focussed on my face. Then I'm, like, "wait, what are you doing?" then, like, "stop, not there", and he's, like, "come on babe, it'll feel good" and then I grimace in pain and try to push him off. Then, freeze frame and a caption, like, "this is what rape looks like" and numbers and websites. I mean, the whole thing would be 20 seconds. Then we could, like, do ones for the other scenarios, you know?"

She nods. "Ok, yeah, that sounds powerful. I mean, if you're happy to do it, I'll definitely take a look. I mean, yeah, I can... well, look, no promises, but at the very least I can handle distribution if the media unit agrees."

"Cool, great!"

Later, while she goes to the bathroom, I set up a quick Whatsapp group, messaging some girls and guys from my course to see who's around for some filming over the holidays. After some deliberation, I add Carrie into the group too.

"So, like, you said something about Grade 7 earlier. What's that?"

"Civil service rankings. They are pay grades, basically, so I'll be north of 50k shortly. But more importantly, it means more responsibility, bigger projects, bigger budgets."

"Bigger than, like, 1.3 mill?"

"Oh yeah, that's chicken feed. I mean, you should see what the idiots threw at Brexit. It was fucking disgusting actually. That's why I'm glad I'm in the MOJ, though I did have to do some work on translating EU law into UK law, which was fucking boring. That's why I jumped at the chance to do this, even though it means I have to be out of London. Luckily, I managed to pull some favours and have it switched to Bristol; it was going to be in Hull! Can you imagine?" She shakes her head in disbelief.

Not really. I'm only vaguely aware of where Hull is. North East somewhere?

"So how long have you been here?"

"Two weeks so far. Another 4 scheduled. Then the plan is back to London, keeping in touch via Teams and occasional visits as required. I mean, it's only 2 hours by train. But I won't get to keep the rental flat, so it'll be single rooms in hotels after May. Well, it might not have to be a single room." She smiles at me.

"You'd want to, like, do long distance?" I'm surprised. Also, flattered. "But, like, we've only just met?"

"Sorry, getting ahead of myself. My point was, I like to keep an open mind about people. I never dismiss anything or anyone. If I'm not interested in exploring the potential of something, I don't bother making a move in the first place, yeah?" She leans forward and covers my hand with hers. I blush and look around, but nobody seems to notice.

I pick up my glass and take a sip. Looking over it, I hold her gaze. "I mean, like, sure. I've applied to Teach First. I was going to do it here in Bristol but, like, I could do it in London?"

She leans back and laughs. "Now who's getting ahead of herself! But, good to know. As I said, I'm open minded."

"But, like, your career comes first I'm guessing?"

"Obviously! I want to be Senior CS by the time I'm 32, then jump to the private sector, maybe land a couple of cushy directorships, do some think tank stuff, and that should leave me ready to retire and have kids at 38."

"Wow, I mean, wow, that's a plan alright. So, like, you want kids?"

"That's what I tell my mother anyway. It keeps her from getting on my case."

She pays for the meal. I offer to pay for myself, but we both know it's a getsure. She's obviously loaded.

"Do you want to go get a drink elsewhere, beautiful? Do some dancing? Or just Netflix and chill?"

"Hmmm, like, that last one sounds good."

We don't bother with Netflix. As soon as we're in the door, she's pinning me to the wall, kissing me hard. "Fuck, you're gorgeous Amanda," she gasps into my mouth as her hands roam over my back. "I love the way you smell. I love you eyes. Fuck, you're sexy." I can barely catch my breath. My skin is tingling all over. I love the way she talks to me.

Our clothes are swiftly shed and she leads me to the bed. Wow, this is escalating fast. I feel the need to speak up. "Err, like, Lucy, I really want to but... well..."

"What is it, gorgeous?" Her husky breath in my ear sends a delightful shiver through me.

"Um, I'm not, like, I'm not up for having anything, you know, inside me."

"That's cool, babe," she grins as she pulls my knickers off, "you ever tried tribbing?"

"Um... I don't even, like, know what that is."

"You'll love it!"

Seconds later we're on her bed, kissing passionately, legs splayed, her right over my left, left under my right, pushing closer. My heart's pumping, breath coming fast, nipples like pebbles, loving the taste of her, the feel of her, the smell of her, the sheer thrill of the newness of her, this door that's opened in me, this freshness. She clasps me hard behind the back of my neck, kisses me hard, then, leaving my lips wet, arches back, thrusting her pussy against mine. Oh! I feel the slick squelching as she grinds against me, the motion teasing and fluttering against my clit. I feel her folds fit into mine, like some kind of erotic origami. Can we come like this? It feels crazy to think we could and yet I feel the buzz building, the tension growing and suddenly Lucy's thrashing and shuddering, her breasts juddering as an orgasm rips through her.

"Bloody hell beautiful, that felt amazing." She flops down next to me. "Did you?"

"No, you?" I lie down next to her, sliding an arm over her.

"Oh God yeah, gorgeous. Just the sight of you - so stunning. Sorry you didn't. It's hard to get tribbing right the first time. Give me a minute babe, and I'll sort you out."

She's good to her word, and strokes me to orgasm with her fingers while we make out. It's lovely.

* * *

I say goodbye to Lucy in the morning, making vague plans to see her Tuesday night next week. Sarah's grabbed me some shifts at the Lounge, so I'm not going to be as free as I thought I would be. But she's interesting and attractive, and when she floods me with flattery I feel like I'm flying, so I'm definitely up for spending more time with her.

Samantha's dad Glen comes after lunch to pick up Samantha, Louise and me. Sarah will come later with Lydia and Keith after their shifts end.

Samantha's house is huge compared to my house and those of my classmates in Redruth. They've even got an indoor pool, not to mention room for everyone. Louise and I are going to share, but actually that's more for fun, as one of us could have taken Stuart's room. I love being there: it's so relaxing and chilled, though her Mum could talk for England. We spend the afternoon making chocolate pralines in the kitchen and eat far too many of the finished items.

Sarah and the others arrive in time for a late supper, then we break out the board games and discuss what we want to do over the holidays while Samantha kicks out butts at Trivial Pursuit. We've all kept Thursday free, so we plan a day out: Bath if the weather sucks, Tintern Abbey if the weather's nice. My suggestion of karaoke on Monday night proves popular but there are funny looks at me when I ask them if it would be ok to invite Carrie.

Louise looks at me askance as she sets up the next game. "Sweetie, I thought you were seeing that woman Lucy?"

"Yeah, I am. I mean, I don't think we're girlfriends or anything, but, like, I'm not gonna see anyone else, you know."

"Are you sure you should be? I mean, what do you even know about her?"

"It's cool Lou, like, she's pretty sound, you know. Plus she's hot."

"Have you got a photo?"

"Um, no."

"Here, roll to see who starts. Well, is she on social media?"

"No. Or, at least I couldn't find her."

"Um, red flag much?"

"Not everyone overshares, Lou. I'm sure it's for work reasons, you know. She's pretty senior. Anyway," I try to change the subject, "can I, like, invite Carrie?"

"Even after she was such a bitch to you?" Sarah leans forward to roll the dice.

"Like, she wasn't really."

"She did come and apologise," says Lydia as she moves her figurine. "I call Rev Green to the library with the candlestick. You saw the flowers, right?"

"It was a nice touch," concedes Sarah as Keith shows Lydia a card. I think I know what that is.

"Yeah, exactly," I say as Keith rolls the dice, "besides, you know, like, I don't think she has many friends, and, like, that's sad. I mean my life would suck without you lot."

"Col Mustard, knife, kitchen."

"It's cool with me if you want to invite her. But do you not want to invite Lucy? I mean, we'd all like to meet her. Vet her." says Lydia

"Well, yeah, but she's got, like, meetings and appraisals in London on Monday, so won't be back until late." I take my turn. "Um...wait... Ms Scarlett with the rope in the library."

"It would be so cool to have a library," sighs Louise as she shows me the rope card. Nice misdirection Louise! "I'm so jealous of your sitting room Samantha, it's just like a library."

"Yes, I appreciate it too. As does Sarah; that's why she spent so much time here when we were at school."

"No, gorgeous, that wasn't the only reason."

"Aw, you two are so sweet. I call Mrs White to the dining room with the rope."

Samantha doesn't have anything, so Sarah slides a card over to Louise.

"Is that, like, cool, if I message her then?" Everyone nods. "Aw, like, thanks peeps."

While Samantha and Sarah have their goes, I drop Carrie a message.

Hey,

Monday night karaoke with me and the girls. Please say you're in? #Into the Woods Reprise

Amanda x

Lydia rolls. "I haven't played this in years. 5,6,7... oh, just. Ok, I want to call Mrs Peacock to the kitchen with the pistol."

"Did you look at my hand?" Keith complains, as he shows her a card.

"If I'd looked at your hand babe, would I bother calling those cards hmmm?" She kisses him.

A message comes back.

Sorry. I'm at my grandparents on Monday evenings. Have fun and thanks for asking Carrie x

"Aw, well, like, she can't do it anyway." I show Keith the dining room. Damn, I was hoping to keep that secret.

"Thanks. Did you get anyone to come to her party on Wednesday?"

"Baz and Suzy said, like, they might be up for it. I mean, nobody else was around, you know?"

"That's kind of sad. Do you want us to come and swell the numbers?"

Wow, that's a thought. "Really? You'd, like, do that?"

Keith shrugs. "We've got no plans Wednesday night, right?"

"No..." Lydia's eyes are narrowed.

"No we do not have plans on Wednesday, do we Sarah? I feel that it would be a compassionate thing to do."

We all turn to Samantha in surprise. That woman. Maybe the world would be a better place with more people like her.

"Besides, you actually know her, don't you Sarah? So, it would make sense if you went."

"What? How do you, like, know her?"

Sarah sighs. "She's Mike's daughter." When she sees our blank stares, she elaborates. "You know, Mike the manager at the lounge?"

"No way! Like, how did I not know that?"

"You going to have your turn, babe?"

"Oh, shit sorry." I roll the dice. "Um, like, I want to see Professor Plum with the lead pipe in the ballroom."

"Hey, Amanda, you wanted some shifts right?" I guess Sarah wants to change the subject.

"Um, yeah, can do, as long as it's not Tuesday or Wednesday night. Or Thursday obviously."

"Monday day time? I thought I might stay on here, so I can go visit my parents. Karaoke isn't really my thing." What she means is karaoke isn't Samantha's thing: she's such a loyal girlfriend. "Also Friday and Saturday Mike needs people I think."

"Not Saturday: my parents are driving up. Otherwise, yeah, like, sure. I mean, will Mike be, like, cool with that?"

"Colonel Mustard, billiard room with the lead pipe. Yeah, I think so, you've worked there before. I'll message him now. Thanks Keith."

"It's Professor Plum in the billiard room with the candlestick."

"You have to, like, roll the dice first, Samantha."

"No, Amanda, I mean that's the solution." She opens the envelope with the missing cards. "Yes, I was correct."

There's a chorus of good natured groans. "How on earth did you work that out Samantha? We've only had two rounds?" asks Lydia.

"Oh, wasn't it obvious?"

"Like, that was fun. I mean, what shall we play next? What do you two usually play?"

"Well, we usually play backgammon, but that's only for two people."

"It is a lot of fun!" enthuses Samantha, "especially since we started including forfeits where the loser-"

"Oversharing! Samantha, that's definitely oversharing my love! They don't want to hear about that. It'll make them feel uncomfortable." Sarah's face has gone beet red.

"Oh. Really? Because I have found that the girls have usually enjoyed hearing about our sexual activities in the past." Samantha turns to us, as we cover our mouths to avoid collapsing into giggles, none of us daring to look at Sarah. "I'm sorry Louise, Amanda and Lydia if showing you our sex toys the other day made you feel uncomfortable." I bite my lip.

Sarah leans forward with a groan, face in her hands, as Louise desperately tries to reassure Samantha without giggling.