All Comments on 'Every Time I Look at You'

Sweet story. Thanks for sharing.

he should have popped allen in the mouth at least once.

MSNBC lol at least it’s tiny bit better than cnn

Personally I don't know if I could have done it. Knowing she was a cheater would leave me uneasy. I think I would possibly have dated a lot longer and I would have the PI on her case. I mean it is company money and not extra. But I can see that Bella disrespected him totally and Shauna disrespected Dale. But that once a cheater always a cheater to me is a big deal. Also, I know it sounds childish, but I hate it when a cheater wins and Shauna definitely won. She comes out of her divorce with what appears to be a great job, A great kid, and now an upgrade in husband.

But this was a nice romance.

Great story, although it was sad that Alan, Carly, and Bella all got happy endings. With the amount of marriages Carly wrecked, she should have ended up alone in the gutter.

It was also entertaining.

Thank you.

Your white rose comment is incorrect. White is often used in Marriage and respect, BUT mainly to demonstrate, Purity, Chastity and Innocence.

Use Red (Ultimate Love, Passion and Longing) or Orange (Passion, Desire and Fierce Love) for Love, ps a web search is a handy weapon if in doubt.

The Rose Grower. Nice yarn BTW

Quite liked that, thank you.

I think this was your best work so far.

5-star effort.

Please write another.

Hooked

Would have given you more, but the thing that stopped me was the nick name you gave Mickey. That name is disrespectful and not worthy of a child someone loves. It is really an abusive title.

The words used were spelled correctly, the sentences were grammatically correct, etc., etc. But... the emotional context just wasn't there. It was awfully bland and written as if the participants were at arm's length. Very disappointing.

Great story. Not a cuck in sight.

Now days what President is going to leave

office for cheating .That's the new normal lol thanks for the read!

This is well written and draws emotion from the reader. Thanks for a great story.

It's just that everything was telegraphed way in advance. The fact that I know everything that was coming made it a little dull. It was still better than 90% of what we've been getting lately. 4 stars.

Thanks for reading and for the feedback!

To the person that didn’t like the nickname stinky, sorry. I thought it was cute. To each their own.

As to the white roses, I’m disappointed in that being wrong. I googled it first.

kinda on the corny side .

fine story but everything was telegraphed from the opening paragraph. There was no suspense in this story which made it dull. Next time try to incorporate a beginning where you build up the characters and get the reader invested in them. Then add the rising action where suspicions are had by the husband, the climax where he finds out, the falling action where he and the wife talk and the husband takes stock of his life and figures out what to do. Finally the resolution where things are wrapped up and they either get divorced or work it out or whatever you choose.

What is this fascination authors have with Twins on Literotica?

Nice little interconnected world you are building here, I really enjoyed that. I found Tate's interaction with Mickey to be one of the most refreshing things about this story, so often in these tales of marital terror the children become doorknobs, they exist as set pieces, dining room furniture and here Tate's interaction with that little guy was the ticket to a relationship that might work. Personally I enjoy longer epics and felt this as well as I Can't Stop the rain had the potential for a lot more meat and potatoes as the stories spun out. Which while it's critical I hope you take as a compliment because it means I like what you put together here and would stick with it.

The idea of a predatory Bisexual or Lesbian annoys me a little, it seems Carly seems to much into women to be married to a man. I thought this about also in the excellent If you truly love me

by CreativityTakesCourage. Maybe I'm misreading it but after almost derailing the candidate and destroying a marriage Carly would just chill for awhile and instead she's the female Caligula knowing the media smells blood in the water. But still good stuff, it seems to me there is a lot of potential little stories in the series you have here, you could go in several directions but in terms of Tate i honestly thing I'd like to guy to ride off into the sunset. I just have a good feeling about that couple and I found it refreshing that Shauna earned some redemption and a second shot at happiness, as well as Mickey who now, I imagine is going to have a great life! Thanks!

Sounds like the shenanigans that the politicians and their cohorts pull!

5

Very good story. Well written and very romantic. I do agree with the comment that the ending was given away too early. That’s an easy mistake to make, especially in a romantic tale. Thank you

Story was well written and entertaining, but certainly could have used a little more emotion from the characters, especially Tate. For example, the confrontation he had with his wife, Bella, concerning the affair she was having with Carly, sounded like one he might have had with an underperforming employee he was letting go.

The love angle between Shauna and Tate pretty much followed the expected script. The surprise would have been if the two didn't end up together.

Tate connecting with Shauna's son, Micky, for me, was the highlight of the story. But 'Stinky' as a nick name? Come on.

Shauna training her replacement, Pat, to be at work by 6:30 watching for the boss to arrive so that she could have coffee waiting for him when he came in, would never happen. Shauna was an excellent, efficient, conscientious employee, but did all those extra things because she was infatuated with Tate. She would train her replacement to do everything an assistant needed to do to make Tate's job easier, but wouldn't want Tate to take too much notice of her outside of her work responsibilities. She wouldn't want history repeating itself.

All in all, I gave it 4 stars.

Again, thank you for a simple enjoyment. Your prologue made me aware of two things that made my enjoyment all the better. First of all, your using characters from other stories (although thinking about it I don't remember if the hospital she was taken to was the same where we met Dr. Love). I look forward to seeing such nonchalant character weaving in future stories. The second was your need to strengthen your sex writing, to which I strongly disagree.

THANKS

Maturity and forgiveness go hand in glove. It was so nice to see Tate's acceptance of Shauna's past, including her drug induced and drunken indiscretion. She was mature and trusting enough to give Tate full disclosure before they took the next step.

Good story!

loved the story made me forget the crap that is going on in the real world. only a few grammatical errors, but hell you write a better story then i ever could.

Crap ending

Kennedy, Clinton and Trump put the lie to that notion.

all right maybe

The ending was a bit abrupt for my taste but the story as a whole was still very good. 5*.

The ending was a bit abrupt for my taste, but the story was still very good. 5*!!

I have heard that argument about "modern marriage" before. That monogamy is "archaic" It has come up in session on more than one occasion.

I don't disagree that society has changed and open relationships or alternative agreements are less widely controversial. That being said, it must be discussed and mutually agreed upon. A spouse cannot take it upon himself or herself to decide that a marriage should be open, swing etc.

Anyway, I wish it wasn't another bisexual slut tale because most of us are not. Hell most of us are as monogamous as heterosexual. It was a nice story nonetheless.

Loved this 5*!

Very good!!!

Yaaaawwwwn

Very good! Very well written. Enjoyed it immensely. Love how many of your stories are interconnected. Thank-you!

Sweet story but writers don't play fair when they inject kids into stories!! Thank you for your story. 5*

Flawlessly executed. You stayed with your storyline for all characters without coming off as preachy or self righteous

So the sister has magical lesbian turning ability? Well written, but poor plot we have been subjected to twice now.

This story was great, except I hated the ending about his sister. If not for that, it would have been a 5.

Strong up to the end and it felt like you just wanted to move on.

Carly didn't had a problem? Really? How deluded is she?

She thought monogamy were archaic chains people put on themselves... But the point is they *chose* to put those chains on and she willingly fucked up the choices that people made for themselves without guilt.

As long as her itches got scratched the fact that people got hurt had no bearing on her.

Overall, a pretty good tale. The characters were relatable, and it felt realistic. My only criticism is that the ending felt way too rushed. 4*s from this guy.

Not satisfied with the standard Martian Slut Ray, Bh76 has enhanced it in this story to cover both lesbo fall-from-grace, AND made it effective in very short elapsed time in the wedding dressing room. Maybe Carly should patent that brilliant ability, or at least hire her skills out.

Nice story, well written, great grammar, rushed "newspaper style" ending.

Keep 'em comin'.

Great Story!

Oh yeah, those rich and famous are having a rough time of it! Seriously, a well constructed story, Author avoided to make my eyes doing their rolling thing, as there are no inconsistencies in character or plot development. Makes living with a somewhat rushed ending bearable. 5 stars, appointed gladly.

Loved the story except the ending. Ideally cheaters / homewreckers should get their own happiness.

The story was ruined for me when the douchebag Alan Brown who fucked a married woman prospered from it.

Terrible world building decision.

Seems it's another story where the sensible choice of a morning after pill, or an abortion would seem like the only sane choice.

Better to create a background story with a bit more common sense IMO.

Shauna says “I promise, I’m not that girl any more”! Shauna was a drug slut during university. We all saw them during University and us intelligent students stayed well away from them because they usually had STDs! Shauna meets her husband after graduating and falls head over heals for him. She immediately gives up drugs and one nightstands. She is happily married for 6 years then they go out for dinner. Shauna is offered cocaine in the women’s washroom and SHE WILLINGLY DOES A LINE OF COKE! When Shauna returns, her husband who she adores is pissed off with her willingly taking drugs and leaves her at the restaurant. So what does this loving wife do? She goes out and parties for the first time in 6 years of an excellent marriage! She does drugs, screws a number of stranglers, goes home with one and gets impregnated by him. Her husband then divorces her. So several years later she is working for Tate who marries her after his divorce from a cheating wife and Tate really believes that Shauna has changed her wicked ways? Bullshit! Shauna has already proven that the monkey is still on her back. At some point in time she will be offered drugs at a party and she will repeat her past actions all over again! Tate was an idiot to marry Shauna! Once a drug slut, always a drug slut!

Uh! You made Alan a Democrat? The author should have made Alan a far right Republican candidate! Trump was know to screw around behind the backs of all his wives! Trump is the only President to have threesomes! Remember there is that internet video of Trump and “golden rain” floating around.

Again, what's with all the unwanted pregnancies in your stories? Women carrying babies to term from one-night stands, even from date rapes, though doing so means the end of marriages and engagements. Usually in LW or Romance stories, there is some religious reason given (tho or course in real life even Catholics get abortions), but you don't even bother with that. It's just a clumsy plot device.

Sometimes I think I am one of the few who reads stories just for the enjoyment. This is a very good little story, hardly a platform for opinions on one-night-stand pregnancies, religion or politics. These are FICTIONAL STORIES! The characters are not real people. Thank you for your tale, 5 stars.

somewhere east of Omaha

Tate ended up with the better woman and has Mickey to call him DADDY! His real WIFE, Shauna is carrying his twins...

Liked the reference to Fox and PMSNBC. I would imagine viewers of the latter never heard of Swallowell's Fang Bang, LOL!

"When I was in college, I was a party girl. I drank, I smoked pot, did some coke, took X, and slept around." That's one you sleep with, not marry.

I have a problem with Tate. He is a dick when it comes to the betrayed husband. It ruins him as being sympathetic in my opinion. He gets a happy ending and revenge but Bill needs to get on board? Yeah no. Fuck him. He is a hypocrite. If Shauna didn't have a kid then I would wish her to be a whore. The son is innocent and that's the only reason he is even remotely redeemable.

Honestly, you didn't think the development through. -starsong77

Yeah yeah, I know. You can find me easily enough if you want to discuss it.

To the desecration idiot below me... I did all that and more. I fucked men, women, lived with and loved a woman as my wife for more than a year, had threesomes, married and divorced from an abusive asshole, I have beat bitches who I shouldn't have even if they were bitches and a few men too.

I married a wonderful man 11 years ago and we have a daughter. NEVER have I ever cheated on him. NEVER have I cheated on anyone with whom I promised exclusivity.

Here is one thing you ought to know about many girls like me. We may have had a wild past but that places a lot into perspective. Nothing is more attractive than my family. I live for it. I wouldn't trade any of those nights and parties for my husband and daughter. Something to consider maybe.

Oh and women like me know men like you. You wouldn't get to "fuck" me when I was dating because your judgemental ass would be showing.

There are a lot of people to keep track of in this one. Not too long, just enough sex details that it keeps from becomming boreing. Written well, moved along briskly with an undertone of fun. No man ever wants to give up playing with toys, even when partly replaced with sex.

Should have left the ending about Carly and Alan out. Story was really great up to that point.

I saw this in the comments below.

"Trumo was the only president to have thteesomes".

I'm no fan of Trump. So not defending him.

But if you honestly think Bill Clinton never had a threesome in his life...maybe it's you taking drugs?

JFK and RFK were rumored to have a threesome with Marilyn

Yes, Shauna was a party girl in her younger days, but he knew her well enough for long enough to want to try it with her. If she had just gotten divorced, then dating her would have been stupid.

Very well done. Clearly written, creative and smooth slowing. I wish the story were longer with a bit more ending, as far as the three moving into Tate's house, and their lives together.

Why does everyone have to be rich in these stories??

President Eisenhower cheated on his wife through WW2 with his driver, it was so well known that the command staff referred to her as "private parts" a military driver. Your story was well done and the story flows well.

This author has a persistent trope of a wife cheating on her husband giving her lover their ass for anal sex because the husband is too big. That seems ludicrous. If she is cheating anyways than whatever. But as a motivation to cheat, makes zero sense. Using plugs and toys and preparation, with patience the wife (who obviously must be fascinated with anal sex) can learn to take her husband's cock after some failed attempts. I can speak from personal experience that it took my wife some time to do anal and not much longer to get into it and be part of our regular sexual menu. It is all about the wife's mindset and patience. The exception would be if the husband has a massive cock. But then what the heck is her thinking anyways. Btw I am just a bit shy of 8 inches and thick. So yeah it took some doing. And no I don't care if you believe me or not.

Wow. All the hate for Shauna. She did all that before her relationship with Tate, professional or romantic. Wtf? People do change. And if anything her troublesome wild years have put things in perspective so she knows how important a solid family would be to her life. She loves and adores Tate. She is a good mother and loves her son. Wtf is wrong with that? Yeah I wouldn't want to learn my future wife has done gangbangs and drugs in the past on our second date but if she came clean and told me about it after we had gotten close (like when I was going to propose) and it was all in the past, we would work it out. I would be more scared about a past serious drug addiction or alcoholism than sex parties and acts. A lot of people have baggage. A lot of men and women have recovered from addiction. People can change. As long as my wife is devoted to me and our future family, we can get past that. Congrats to AngelRider for finding your husband and wish you and your family a happy, fulfilling life.

I am sure that Jimmy Carter never had an affair. Nor Biden. Probably not Obama. I suspect GW Bush may have while in office, though he likely cheated before being elected. Most people believe that Truman did not. Reagan may nit duento age and then Alzheimer's in his second term, but hencheated on his first wife. The rest going back to Woodrow Wilson (who was a nasty racist and misogynist anyways) almost certainly did. No clue about Teddy Roosevelt.

MSNBC? The groomers news network

Wow just love it it’s fantastic

Poor Dale got the shaft. Work hard to reconcile and counsel with Shauna to repair a marriage she damaged by cheating while drugged and turns out she is pregnant with mystery studs kid. Wtf? Ever here of a morning after pill. Dale would have opposed it out of religious reasons but she should have done it on her own accord. Don't get these LW women who cheat, willingly or unwillingly but have no birth control. The on exception is she is trying to have a kid with her husband and something happens with chemical influence or nonconsent. Otherwise be a modern woman and be careful of contraception. If not on the pill or diaphragm and something uncontrolled happens then when she wakes up get a morning after pill to be safe. It is common sense. Otherwise you end up gutting the marriage as what she did to Dale. Now if a woman is off birth control on purpose and willing on bareback sex with another man, then that is just crap. Broken condoms and birth control slipups in an affair are stupid but conceivable because shit happens. But ignoring planned extramarital pregnancy or accidents, any woman who is cheating intentionally should cover birth control carefully (because her lover probably doesn't care) and those who fall into something unintentional but fucked up like Shauna m, should get assistance afterwards to keep her marriage intact. Yeah Mickey was a nice kid, but any woman at that point with a right to choose, who knows her marriage could be at risk eoukd get a morning after pill. And before someone argues she was distracted with Dale. Bullshit. She has up to 3-5 days depending on the pill. So no. What really gets me is the LW stories where a slut wife is in a longer affair, but has no emotions for her repeat lover, and somehow messes up or forgets birth control. Especially when she is older and her husband had a vasectomy. How does that happen? The 99% claim on modern birth control pills is an underestimate based on people being non-compliant and forgetting their pill. Even then if she sees the slip up (extra pill in container) then get a morning after pill. Read too many stories here where wife is married for 20+ years, hooks up with a boy toy in his 20s or early 30s, gets hot snd heavy for several months to feed her ego and feel desired and well ends up pregnant. Wtf? An empty nester older married woman would follow her birth control assiduously and would take action if she detected a slip up. It is also not a stretch (though not popular on this site) that if she missed her period, she would arrange for an abortion asap without hesitation.

Very good group of stories well done!! Whom ever anonymous is give it a break if you didn’t like it just leave the story. You spent more time trashing it than reading it.

Ok so I’ve read this before and there’s a story missing there’s a couple at the winery that sees Carly and Bella but I can’t remember the name of that story can anyone help cuz it’s an excellent one

Got to totally agree with the anon below with the long post. The reason for this, I think, is that many of the writers of these stories are either very old or come from backward religious communities that still think it's the 1950s

I’m not sure why AngelRider would be upset with desecration. Pretty clearly, neither one of you would be attracted to each other so what’s the issue? There’s literally 8 billion humans on the planet. Is it unusual for two people (2.5 x 10^-8 % of the population) to not be attracted to each other’s perspective. Grow up, AngelRider.

There, of course, are several issues with the politics in that I’m not sure a strong progressive or a strong conservative could actually win a national election without some moderating positions or alleged positions.

Regardless, it was a decent story, but maybe not as affecting as the first story in the trilogy. I like the writing and despite the perspective change, it was well written. I hope you continue to write.

I love the story. One of my favorites!

Yeah…anyone that watched es MSNBC isn’t smart enough to comprehend a serious relationship anyway….oh well,.

Liked the story but wanted more. Also never said this before but wanted more btb for the sister. She was truly scuzzy.

Sorry, I usually like your stories but this one gets a weak 2.5 stars from me. Would have been 1 star but at least the skank didn't get more than a condo from him. Story problems in detail:

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1. Dale didn't get a Happily Ever After but Shauna did.

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2. Skanky slut got a fucking condo despite the pre-nup (in case people don't get it, she got a freebie worth hundreds of thousands of dollars, as a gift for cheating). She also got a happily ever after, because why not, all the shit characters get that.

/

3. Speaking of, Shauna got an undeserved Happily ever after. Yes. I can maybe possibly buy that she's not a party girl anymore, but there's plenty of women who'd love to marry a handsome rich CEO who were NEVER party girls, NEVER cheated and NEVER had a cuck coke baby from a rando (that the CEO now gets to take care of instead of his own kids).

/

4. No punishment for Carly the psycho. Minor amount of money in settled lawsuit (given her family is reach and she was born with a silver dick in her ass), and she didn't get to be a First Lady. Big Fucking Deal.

So Tate's natural reaction is to just fire anyone who displeases him? What a colossal tool. Also, MSNBC... For a corporate tycoon type? Most likely not

When the best part of the story is the MC on his knees, playing toy trains with the kid, maybe it feels like it drags a bit.

Well that ending crashed and burned hard, seriously, BH not everyone deserves a happy ending, people must pay for their sins/crimes, you are too soft

Why would Tate try to stop Carly from paying Bill a settlement he deserved for her breaking up his marriage? Furthermore, Tate and Shauna should never have any contact or relationship with Carly and Alan unless he can be absolutley sure that they are no longer sexual predators and that would be almost impossible to prove.

Hey, it's not like it's Bella's fault that the sight of a pussy makes her completely fail to remember she was supposed to be monogamous - with her husband.

And the fact that a smaller cock than her husband's makes her need her ass to get fucked.

After all, she 'loves' her husband so clearly her cheating had no bearing on anything... right...?

Delusional cheating bitch.