All Comments on 'Family Drama Pt. 01'

Wow... I love the original but the story you're crafting is even better. Bravo, keep up the good work!

really like this story please continue this story

OK This makes part 2 make so much more sense. For some reason the site posted part two first and I was a little lost. Now having read this part I have binge read both and I enjoyed the story ten times better.

Mother 36, daughter 20 born 18months after marriage so the mother got married at 14?

I really liked Scouries' original tale, but this is shaping up to be even better. It looks like he may breed them all. What a punch in the gut to Dad that will be. I just hope they all eat pussy. As a bonus, he might even bang the first wife, Vanessa's mom. She can't be past mid 40s at most. 5/5 stars.

Dewey Cheatham

This will be interesting. 5*

First off, you desperately need an editor. If you had one that SUPPOSEDLY checked this story over before you submitted it, THEN FIRE THEM! I found numerous type mismatch errors like "wear" and "ware". But the most egregious one is in the following quotation:

"However, I had an anterior motive to go."

Surely you meant "ulterior" motive? 🤔

Secondly, I love the concept of how he was able to legally get married to his half sister. I also love that his full blood sister is falling for him too. Undoubtedly, he will claim her in an upcoming installment. BUT, I'm not at all happy with David becoming a motherfucker. 😒 I want him to claim his revenge, but fucking your own mother is NOT the way to achieve that.

Also, Vanessa has agreed to sharing him to achieve her own level of revenge. But because of the conversation that they had near the end of this installment, it's clearly evident that she's not 100% on board with the idea. That points towards manipulation and coercion on David's part which is totally NOT COOL. 😑

You lost points for all of that. Have him breed Vanessa, Krista, and Katrina and leave it at that. Don't bring Mommy into it and I won't give you a 1/5.

Personally not a fan of the revenge angle.

The main character seems like a stand up guy then ends up a two-faced manipulator, paying staff and involving his half-sister etc. 2/5

(I know its just a story but taking someone to the woods, disabling a car battery, and neutralizing phones is extremely controlling behavior.)

I like the author's style of writing. The character of the son is a prime example for abortion. As near as I can derive from this story, the father has done nothing to harm the son. The son is not married to his mother. Likewise, what happens between husband and wife is none of the business of the children, uless there is abuse,

Just curious about the ages. Mom is 36, Sister is 20, Dad is 62.... So 42 year old dad knocked up a 15 year old and then married her...I know we suspend believe in these stories but that is a little silly.

Well written I am enjoying the story so far 🙊🙉🙈

Still one of the greatest after years

pages 3/4 are from a different story...would love to read the rest of the wedding story :(

I like this story line, well done.