All Comments on 'Family Pies'

Good start.

nice intro

What a waste of time and pathetic bullshit

Great story. I would love to see this continue.

Not a good start.Mom sounds bipolar.yelling to do as told than sweet as pie.And very clumsy too.

And??????

You just quit the story

Ended to soon when can we expect more

Nice start with lots of potential, but this is only half done. It was posted very prematurely... Please take it down, finish it, and then repost it when it's complete.

Why do the authors on this site do this? I understand you aren't professional authors with a team behind you, but you should have asked someone what they thought, and if you should post it. Feel free to ping me. I can help you, heck I can even edit the story. I catch so many typos and bad grammar in stories on here, I wish someone would ask me to proofread and edit their crap.

The sort of mind that would categorize this as erotica is the reason normal everyday chuds like me have to read news stories about Jump Humping and Bubble Porn.

Now that's one HELL of a lead into a story. I bet sisters want in on the pie making too. I hope the new chapters are a bit longer. Next please. 5☆

That’s it? It’s a great start, but I think you posted way too early. I’m looking forward to when you get to the meat of the story

Good start. Seems like the story didn't fully upload lol. But will definitely keep an eye out for a sequel. Don't listen to the hate. Just write what you wanna write.

Decent preamble...

I want to find out what happens next!