All Comments on 'Fate'

A nice love story. It moved too fast though. It needed more character development and more interaction between the characters. You could have written more chapters. That's my 2 cents opinion. Thanks for your time and imagination.

What a lovely story. Thank you for sharing it/

I wrote this as I do all my stories just for the fun of it. But also as an experiment in if I could write it. Also the what if idea of it. However, more readers seem to have red it faster than anything else I have written. Thanks all of you for reading this and I hope to write a better story in the near future.

This could have been longer, but was still enjoyable as a short. Since it takes place in Petaluma, you could have had her enroll at the Petaluma campus of the Santa Rosa Junior College gaining her Associates Degree before moving on to Sonoma State University for more. Mixing with the other students would offer plenty of opportunities for conflict thus facilitating plot developments. Fun to read a story set in Sonoma County, such a beautiful place. Thank you for sharing with us. Definitely like the HEA, but maybe not quite so soon.

Now let your storytelling drive the stories.

Give your characters lives, likes and dislikes.

Don't try to cut short your narrative until it is written and ready for editing.

If you do not have an editor let text to speech read it back to you.