Fatherly Love

"That's enough, Jimmy. Thank you." Control yourself, my brain shouted at me. Being horny because Sophie didn't want to bang me is one thing, but being horny because my son gave me a massage was another, and that is hard to compute in your head.

The front door opens, and Luke comes in, in running shorts and a sweat-soaked tank top. His face and legs were red from the exercise, and his eyes took a moment to appreciate what was happening. Me, with my shirt open and my chest, exposed, with Jimmy behind me in a singlet.

"Hi guys," he says, greeting us by raising an arm. Jimmy still has his hands on my shoulders and grabs my flesh with need. He's enjoying the scenery right now. Luke is more of his type.

"You ok, Luke?"

"Yeah, went for a run. Are we doing massages? God, I could use one, too," he laughs.

"Go and have a shower. We'll get Jimmy to work those muscles too."

"Dad!" he whispers.

Luke strips off his tank top, and the shower water runs after a few seconds. "The massage was for you, not him."

"I'm sorry, son. You don't have to do it. That's fine."

"I don't know, Luke," he whispers, sitting at my side. Thank god I had that pillow. He puts one hand on my knee, "is he a good friend of yours?"

He makes me smile. "Luke's my best friend, Jimmy. We've been in the military together."

Jimmy nods. "Maybe some other time, dad. What do you want for dinner?"

Gosh, it's almost eight. I go to the kitchen, checking what we could have for dinner, and Jimmy comes along with me, still wearing his singlet. He smiles at me, and I realize my shirt is still open. He seems to like the view, which is more than I can take now. I know the look in his eyes, and I don't want that. I don't want this to happen. "That's enough, Jimmy," I say to him, buttoning up my shirt and his face goes red. He mumbles something and returns to his bedroom just as Luke gets out of the shower. In a quick dance, Jimmy goes into the bathroom, and Luke stands before me, towel around his waist.

"What happened? Jimmy looked upset. Hope it's not me."

I take out some steaks from the fridge. "No, it's not you," I say, closing the fridge door and paying little attention to him.

"No massage for me, then? God, my legs hurt like hell."

"Thought you were used to running," I mock him.

"Not that much, but today was what I wanted."

"Stressful day?"

"Kelly doesn't speak to me. I got no luck getting my money back, and I'm no longer used to applying for jobs. But there are a couple of places I'm sending an application, probably tomorrow."

"You need another night?" I ask.

"If that's ok with you and Jimmy. I don't want to be a burden."

A few minutes in, I have a nice rice cooking, and I'm just waiting for Jimmy to come out of the shower to get these steaks on the pan. Why is he taking so long?

"Jimmy?" I knock on the door and can hear him moaning. He's doing something alright, but I let him have his privacy. Luke joins me in the kitchen, fully clothed now, and asks if I'm not changing to something more comfortable than the office suit. I heed his advice, and he follows me to the bedroom, continuing to chat about his work prospects.

I undress in front of him like I did many times before, and he goes silent as I get those grey sweatpants back on again. "What?" I ask, throwing a t-shirt on top.

"You look amazing," Luke says, making me blush.

"Well, it's a shame Sophie doesn't think that."

"What?" His voice comes out in a higher pitch. "Crazy woman. You have the body of a god."

"Such an exaggeration. Now, let's get those steaks moving. Jimmy can eat them cold."

"Is he masturbating?"

"You were twenty-one before."

That makes him laugh, and I tell him about the intern at work.

"Do you think he wanted to bang you?"

"Hundred percent sure of it."

"At least men don't get pregnant."

We burst into laughter. He's thinking the same as I am, which we have always shared since meeting for the first time. The closeness and constant companionship made us telepathic, understanding each other cues and sharing a thought without needing words to formulate it.

"Would you fuck him?" Luke asks, placing both hands in his pockets and adjusting his cock.

"Nah. Looks too much like Jimmy."

"And?"

"Jesus Christ, Luke. What's gotten into you?"

"A hole is a hole, bro. As long no one sees you, you'll be fine."

He makes me think for a second too long, and my cock swells up in the sweatpants, but I push it up and hold it in my waistband, covering it with my t-shirt.

"No, can't do. First, Sophie, she's still my girlfriend. And second, it would be weird as fuck. Just, no."

"Don't mind if I do then."

"Luke, you can't just go to my company and fuck my intern. I got you a bed in my son's bedroom, so think carefully in your next words."

Luke's lips are a thin line as he looks at me seriously. "Simon, I'm interested in you, not your son." He puts one hand on my chest, and another grabs my cock. "If you just let me show you, one more time, how fantastic you are..." but I push him away.

"No, no, and no Luke. Fuck, dammit, it's hard enough without you pressuring me. I'm faithful to Sophie."

CHAPTER 4 (LUKE) - WEAVING WEBS

Simon will be mine. It's always a little dance and a little fight like this. But this time, I can't fuck up.

I shouldn't have this way of thinking because all of the other times we got intimate, I was the one pushing the boundaries more and more until it broke. Do I love him? What's love is the first question I need to ask. I need to be more worried about Kelly and what she's doing to my money - I spoke to a friend of my father's lawyer, and he's looking into it. Tomorrow, I'll go and knock on her door, someone has to make sense of this situation, and I still don't believe that Blonde Laura is pregnant.

Maybe I'm just a lost cause.

Maybe I'm not worthy of anything after all.

The conversation with Laura just proved me wrong. She's pregnant, and I have no reasons to suspect I'm not the father. Fuck. Not what I needed. She can hold a conversation with me, and we set the cards on the table - there's no love between the two of us, and we wish not to be together, but she has agreed to let me into her life and be the father I wasn't with Kelly. Her mum was there too; her eyes brought judgment with the stare, burning my skin and flesh like I was made out of pure hell. It was clear she disapproved of her daughter's decision to allow me in, but I'm not running away from the consequences.

Kelly, on the other hand, is still out of reach. I go to her mom's house, and no one opens the door. The radio silence is unnerving, and the lack of finances makes my life more difficult than it should be, although a voice in my head tells me I deserve it. Maybe I do. But I'm done dealing with maybes.

In the afternoon, I ring Simon and go by his office. Just a couple of days, but already causing a stir in his life. I want to see who he was talking about yesterday, but security doesn't allow me to progress past the lobby. Fine. I wait.

It's Friday, so maybe we could go to a bar and have a good time together. Like old times? Maybe like old times.

There's nothing more dangerous than trying to relive what we had. The past is unmovable. To recreate is to strip down happiness from the memories and be left with a bitter-sweet taste, a terrible "what if" as an afterthought.

But as I'm immersed in wondering, Simon waves at me. At least a face that makes me smile. We hug tightly, and I can smell the horniness and desire in him. Something is shifting. "Hey, so, can I stay a third night?" I ask, pouting to get his attention and, in a way, to make him slightly uncomfortable. But I fail to do so, or he's a good actor--one of those.

"Why don't you stay until you get a place? Jimmy is fine with it, too, so no need to lose sleep."

"That's fucking sweet."

"Now, why are you here? I can't believe you came to check on that guy," he says as his voice becomes a slow whisper.

"Had a pretty shitty day. Want to go for a drink? And yes, curious about the intern. Is he around?"

"I think he left already," Simon says, and as we get ready to go, he stops and points at a guy with his back turned to us as he's chatting with the security guy. "That's him."

Holy fuck. "The similarities are there, but I wouldn't mistake Jimmy for that guy."

Then he turns his face to us as he prepares to leave and stops on his steps, finding us both looking at him. Holy mother of god, now I was fucking wrong.

"They all look the same, am I right?" I laugh, thinking that Jimmy is juicier.

"Shit, he's looking at us. Right, shall we make our way out?"

I protest but follow, looking back a couple of times. That guy is looking for a good pounding, that I'm sure. "There's a bar down the street where we can have a couple of beers."

"Is Jimmy joining us?"

"Jimmy has training tonight," Simon says.

We sat at the bar in high seats, and the barman served us two cold ones. He talks about his week and how Sophie keeps avoiding him. I ask if he's happy with her, and he tells me it's like she's the one not happy with what they have.

"Why don't you break up?"

"You'd like that, isn't it?"

"I don't -"

"That's alright, Luke. I know you didn't mean it that way. But you always run away, dude. And I'm not ready to open this much to Jimmy or Sam."

"Sam is far away, bro."

"But Jimmy still needs me and a lot."

"Why do you think he would... be upset? I think he won't mind a bit." At that moment, all I could think about was how I suspected Simon's son had stolen my dirty underwear. I saw the shine in his eyes as he finished up that massage on his dad, and I could be wrong, but Jimmy had more layers than Simon suspects.

He drinks his beer, "fuck, what do I know? I think he might be gay, despite having that girlfriend."

"He has?"

"Nancy. Yes, she's not very interesting, and their chemistry is appalling," he laughs.

Another beer comes our way, and in the corner of my eye, I spot that intern, the Jimmy wanna-be, and I signal that to Simon. "I think he followed us here."

"That's fine. Everyone comes around one of these bars."

"I mean, you say he couldn't stop looking at your cock?"

Simon whispers as the barman seems to be looking at us. "Yes, dude. He was staring, like a deer in the middle of the night, struck by the lights."

"So why don't you give him some of that? Just to relieve your balls, I mean."

"Luke, no! I have Sophie, and the resemblance with Jimmy also puts me off."

That's not what it looks like.

We drink like old times. So be careful, don't go down that road.

"I went to see Laura today."

"Laura?" I gesture the epic banging, and he understands immediately. "Ah, your intern. How applicable," he smiles.

"So, I'm going to be a dad."

Simon chokes on his drink, putting it down to prevent spilling it all over himself. "You what now, baby boy?"

"Yup, you heard me."

"I thought you didn't want kids."

"That was more Kelly than I. But yeah, that happened. I spoke to Laura today and am happy to help raise the child with her."

"That's very sweet. We gotta celebrate."

The idea is ultimately soul-crushing, but maybe that's what I deserve. And I'll own it, no matter what. Perhaps I should have started sooner, the father role. At 44, it seems like I lost all my life.

I don't regret the time I had with Kelly. I regret ending this badly.

"Kelly and I had a dead bedroom for a while now, you know?" Simon went silent as I confessed what I had never told anyone.

"Gosh, that sounds awful, my friend."

"It is. No matter what I did, she was never in the mood."

"How long?"

"We haven't fucked in more than one year." I look down at my hands, "she said I was too big, and then she wasn't in the mood, then it was work... fuck, why did it take me so long?"

"To cheat on her?"

"Am I counting the times you came deep in my ass, Simon?"

He goes red in the face and drinks the rest of his beer in one go. "Fucking hell, Luke, that was straight to the heart. You're my best friend, and we were curious. That doesn't count."

"So yeah, Laura was the only time I cheated on Kelly. And Rita. And Philomena. And... ah, fuck it."

"Do you think she was having an affair?" Simon asks me, and after careful thinking, yes, I wish she was. Why be miserable when your husband is a cheater, right?

"Right, enough about me. Tell me, Simon, my very best friend: are you going to fuck this intern or not?" He's just ordering a drink at the bar, a margarita, and Simon smiles.

"I'm not, but why don't you have a taste?"

"I wanna be fucked by you, Simon. You know what I like."

Simon puts his arm around my shoulder and says, "trust me," in a muttered voice, "you'll like that little mouth of him. I bet he's almost as good of a cocksucker as you are." And, without waiting for my reply, Simon turns to the barman and says, "that's on me, and get him another."

Soon enough, the intern, whose name is Brian, is between us, walled by two broad big men. The barman says nothing, but he could tell we had something up our sleeve, but I couldn't give two fucks. Since Simon mentioned cocksucking skills, I was interested.

The intern drinks his margarita delicately, enjoying it - quite opposed to how I drink my beer. He has a pleasant voice, an octave higher than Jimmy's, and holds a conversation on different topics. All I can think of is his mouth; despite the alcohol, I can clearly control my urges.

"Why did you follow us, Brian?" I ask, interrupting whatever he's saying.

"I didn't."

"Oh, come on, you clearly did. I think you have a thing for Simon there."

Brian looks at us, trying to think of something to say. It is Simon who intervenes.

"That's alright, Brian, you're safe with me. I won't tell a soul, but I'm also seeing someone right now, and I don't want to lead you on the wrong trail."

Brian is still speechless.

"He said it's alright, my dude. Breathe."

"I'm not out yet, and... how did you know?"

"You stared at his cock in the toilets long enough for everyone to guess you're interested more in a measuring contest," I say, letting him calm down. "Also, mine is bigger."

This makes Simon laugh in a burst, and Brian gets contaminated by his boss, loosening up a bit. I want his mouth around my cock so much. And I pass my arm around him, feeling his figure and realizing he is half my size. You'll break him in half. But I'm horny. Too horny. "Right, guys, I need to use the restroom."

And as I walk, I hope he follows me. But he didn't. I wash my hands and return to my seat when Simon tells me he booked a room in the motel just in front.

"Sophie just texted me. We're over."

CHAPTER 5 (SIMON) - ONE STEP TOO FAR

Things happen fast, too fast. From the bar to the hotel, it's like a second, and the lift takes too damn long. Brian, who I see as shy and prude, is a devil in disguise, and the lift's doors are about to open as he gets his hands inside Luke's trousers. I hear both of them moan. We walk through the carpeted floor with golden decor and open the 214. A bed with white linen lies in front of us, surrounded by deep blue curtains and terrible furniture choices. Nothing matters at that moment, and as I close the door, I'm surprised to see Luke throwing Brian on the bed like he is weightless.

Fuck, is this that very much wrong? Not only does he look like Jimmy, but he also works with me. Under me.

Brian moans as he crawls out of bed to kneel in front of Luke, getting his cock out of his trousers and stopping for a second. The look in his eyes. Size matters to some, and Luke had the biggest size of all.

"Fucking waiting for?" Luke's colossal hand forces Brian onto his cock; that sweet mouth is opening as much as he can. I know what it is like to suck Luke, and it's a job in itself. That thing deserves a postcode of its own.

"Gentle there," I warn him as I see Brian struggling with such an enormous monster, smacking his ass with my heavy hand.

"Come here," he mutters, grabbing me by the hair and kissing deeply. Fuck, I missed this.

We kissed long and good, a wet desire growing between us while Brian worked on Luke's cock, and I could hear him fight that monster. Please let Brian have lube.

I observe as Luke forces more of his cock down Brian's throat, and I know it will not work. There's a science to deal with Luke - and I know how to play him. Maybe Kelly also did, but got fed up - the more he gets excited, the more dangerous all those inches are, and he loses control as he gets lightheaded from the power of his erection. I shiver to think he is sleeping in the same room as Jimmy. Has Jimmy looked at his raging boner?

"Undress," I tell Brian, saving him from a locked jaw, and throw Luke in the bed, hoping on top of him. "And you better behave, Luke." I'm strong enough to put up a fight, and it's something he enjoys - he wants to be manhandled.

As we kiss, I have Brian climb to bed with us, and he starts working on my cock. He sucks good, but I want Luke's mouth there. I ask Brian if he brought any lube, and he says yes with his head, and then I point him to let Luke suck me. I almost had tears in my eyes as he started to suck me, a mouth made of heaven and clouds, cotton candy, and love. Brian watched closely, learning skills that would be useful in the future. I pull him up for a kiss while Luke loses his manners and slurps my cock like nothing else in the world.

We never shared anyone. It was always Luke and me. Brian doesn't fit the picture I expected, but he is so eager to have some action that I let him be a part of us.

"Hey, stop kissing him," Luke says, taking my cock from his mouth.

I kiss Brian one more time and ask him to get Luke ready. Brian surprises me to get him undressed, and as Luke sucks me, Brian spreads out his buttocks and goes down on him. Luke starts moaning so loud that it is disturbing, and Brian doesn't want to stop, his tongue doing wonders out of that hole. The big, muscular man, under the spell of a twunk half his size.

"That's it, Brian. Get him ready for a big nice throbbing cock."

Brian laughs and goes to town. His cock is fully hard, leaking, but he doesn't touch it.

"Oh fuck," Luke screams, "how do you do that?" He leaves my cock as he bites the pillow with pleasure.

"He's ready, Sir," Brian tells me, getting the lube and probing Luke with a finger.

I know he is - I can tell by the way he moans. I'm making the same mistakes again and again. The lust will become ashes when we're done, and who's going to be to blame? I reach over, kiss Brian again, and whisper, "fuck him, Brian." I grab his cock, and much to his surprise, I take his bottom and drive it to Luke's ass. "Luke, this time we'll do things my way," and he grunted a fuck me. I remember his insatiable ass, and I'm sure Brian won't forget it, either. The boy shivers as he presses against the monster of a man underneath him, and I push him further. I can hear it enter, and I kiss Brian harder and rougher, and his pelvis moves that nicely average cock inside Luke.

The way he moans! Brian does his best, trying to correspond with Luke's agitation - he wants more, but Brian can only give him so much. I search for Luke and kiss him, too, while holding hands with Brian, and I can see in his eyes a few more seconds there will be a flood inside Luke. "Do it!" I grunt, making poor Brian shiver in an uncontrollable orgasm as Luke shouts Jimmy instead of Brian. That fucks me up for a second, having to focus my eyes and understand that's not Jimmy.