by meelana
I didn't notice the comments saying you need an editor until someone else referenced them. Honestly, I think the writing is very good. It's solid, descriptive, and overall lacking in errors. I confess I'm a stickler for grammar but only noticed a few typos. They weren't awful and certainly didn't make me want to stop reading. Of course, an editor is always good if you don't have one. I would even volunteer, if you just need an extra set of eyes to catch the small stuff :)
I liked it and it was a nice start but it was way to short. I would love to see more of your writing and for it to be longer so I could enjoy it for a longer amount of time.
I SEE CHAPTHER TWO IS POSTED. I PARTIED ALL WEEKEND SO I'M JUST SETTLING DOWN TO READ. GOOD DETAILS AND SLOW MOVING. TWO REALLY GREAT THINGS I LOOK FOR IN A STORY. I'M NOT HUNG UP ON FINDING HOW MANY ERRORS ARE IN A STORY WHEN I READ THEM.
GOOD LUCK.
I love the detail and the pace. I'm already in love with your characters and can't wait to see where this goes. Please continue with lots and lots!
I don't know why people are telling you to get an editor - I generally notice mistakes, but this seemed fine - I just enjoyed reading. Nice start to a story, and looking forward to seeing what you have in store for us.
Please, do get an editor. It will make a BIG difference. Honest!
Actually, I have already posted the next Chapter. Hopefully it will be up soon. It seems its taking way too long to go from pending to posted. :)
Post soon please. This is really good, I loved it even if it was too short.
Too short, but its a great way to get our attention!! This little tidbit is a great start and I like it already. More please!!
it's waaaaaaaaayyyyyy, to short. I am ging to like this story, please post soon.
Wonderful intro but it hardly ranks as an appetizer. Excellent pacing. Good dialog. Strong imagery. I look forward to more. But please give us larger potions.
Great way to start off but u left us wanting more..please update soon.
This is a great tease of a story for the next chapter. I'll be looking forward to it.
Definately waiting to read more. This is an awesome start to a story. Please continue.
I agree with fefe428. Great beginning and can't wait to read more...j am wondering g if she is the alphas mate
You're off to a very nice start, and I am very intrigued about where you plan to take your story. I am very partial to werewolf and vampire stories, so I am excited to see a new one starting.
I would suggest that if you're serious about continuing the story, which I hope you are, that you seek out an editor or at least a proof reader. While there is nothing wrong with your writing, there are some common typos and mistakes that would easily be caught by another set of eyes. I think you'll find that the difference these minor corrections will make in the finished product you turn out can be significant, especially when it comes to the seriousness with which people will perceive your writing.