Finding Beth Ch. 05

By the time I'd lived in Feltville for two months, I was pretty much broke.

Not dead-ass, down-to-my-last-penny broke, nor time-to-turn-tricks-at-the-bus-stop broke, but close. My credit card was maxed, what little savings I'd come to town with were spent and I had done all I could to squeeze in extra hours at Bart's but it just wasn't enough; minimum wage plus tips just didn't add up. I was coming up with money to pay the rent on time, but after Rob got his check there was precious little, if anything left for groceries.

Bart knew. He also knew I wasn't the only one. He let everyone know that anything opened but uncooked at the end of the day was up for grabs, and those of us who needed it would share it out at the end of the day. It helped, but only a little.

I looked for a second job, but as I soon realized I had been damn lucky to find a spot at Bart's; everywhere I looked wasn't hiring, or if they were they needed experience or a ridiculous amount of qualifications that I did not have. I'm sure you know this story, won't bore you too much with it. I wasn't starving, though I had lost six pounds since I moved to Feltville. My hips didn't get that particular memo, though. But there was absolutely nothing left for anything else. I cancelled my Netflix and used Jamie's instead. I stopped trying to make my apartment more homely: I had the two wine glasses I bought, four regular glasses and four sets of plates and cutlery -- all from home. I started taking cold showers to save on water. Jamie took me out to dinner from time to time and was very kind: She never allowed me to feel in her debt and she never once pitied me.

We hadn't talked much about her videos since that day, though by now we talked pretty regularly. Sometimes she would let me know in advance that she was bringing someone over and I would put something on with my headphones at max volume to drown it out. If I could have afforded a couch by now I would have moved into the other room those days, but you do what you can. I'd glanced at her website only once or twice and watched some of the other free videos of just her, but I'd tried hard to pretend she was just my new friend, rather than my new friend who did porn. I was still afraid of... something, but I couldn't have told you what at the time. Let's just say it was very confusing to me.

Me, her and Trevor did go out for drinks once. I wasn't sure if she knew about that first night when I heard them through the wall, but maybe she assumed I could see all her videos, I had no idea if she would be able to tell if I had subscribed or not. Which I hadn't. Even if I had wanted to I couldn't afford it. Anyway: I did like Trevor, Jamie was right; he was a really nice guy. Sweet and warm, funny and caring. I often found myself thinking of him and Jamie that night, and what I felt was... I suppose jealousy, the only trick was I never felt entirely sure who I was jealous of.

So, the day came when I reached a point: I'd just paid rent and took a look at my bank account and found it practically empty and I realized I needed to do something. I'd already talked to Bart several times and there was nothing he could. I needed a second job, but nobody was hiring. I couldn't really cut down on any more expenses, I was already on noodles or rice most days. So how could I make any extra money? How, how, how...

Well...

It's not like I'd never thought about it before, but never seriously. Not even for very long -- it still scared me what Jamie did for a living; it was sleezy, dangerous and... andwrong!

Why is it wrong? I had asked myself whenever I caught myself moralizing and really I never thought of an answer. Jamie was an adult, she wasn't being taken advantage of or anything... so what was the harm? Seemed like she'd set up a pretty safe way of doing things and she seemed to enjoy it.

Well okay, but it's not for you, come on! Well... okay it wasn't anything I'd ever considered until I moved to Feltville, that's for damn sure. And okay, I wasn't anything like Jamie but... I mean maybe? And what other options were there? I didn't see any at the time. So one day I invited Jamie over, told her I needed her advice on something and she showed up after work. We sat down at my kitchen table and chatted for a bit until Jamie pushed:

"Okay hun, enough chit-chat, what's on your mind?" I took a deep breath and dived in.

"You know... what you do?"

"...work the register?" she asked innocently.

"No, the other thing." I said with my best 'quit-your-bullshit' look.

"Oooooh. The other thing." she grinned. "What about it?"

"How do you... get into it?" her grin faded a little and she looked at me quietly before replying:

"Well... I got into it in college. I did OnlyFans for a while, built a following then got my own website to help pay for my marketing degree. Which was a waste of money, but that's life. Why do you ask, hun?"

"I've just been... I've just been thinking. You know, I guess... guess I'm struggling a bit and just thinking about options."

"Honey," she leaned forward to squeeze my hand "If you need money I can always spring you a little."

"That's very nice of you, but that's a temporary solution to a permanent problem." I said matter-of-factly.

"Okay, but... honey what I do is... it can be kinda rough. It can be real hard on your self-esteem; people can be real pricks online, you know." My heart sank a little as what I thought her true meaning was.

"I... I know I don't look... like you, but-" Jamie's other hand whipped out and she grabbed a hold of my forearms and stared into my eyes.

"Fuck that, Beth: That's not what I'm talking about. You'rehot -- there's a ton of guys out there who would love to get you into their bed, or watch you... you know. I'm just saying it can be a real hard business, okay? I mean you've seen the comments on my videos, right?"

"Actually, no." Jamie looked a little surprised.

"Oh. You... never checked out my website?"

"No I did" I said, feeling heat on my cheeks again, "but only the free version. The premium is-"

"Riiiight of course..." she trailed off, thought for a moment, then fished out her phone.

"Okay listen here honey -- if you're serious about this let's talk about it but only once you've actually got an idea for what you're getting yourself into. Here-" my phone buzzed; she'd sent me another link: "That's a free subscription. Take a look around, watch some videos and read some of the comments and afterwards if you're serious about this I'll... I can help you with some advice. Okay hun?" I thanked her, we hugged and then changed topics. Later that night I laid down in bed, headphones on and decided to take a look.

The first thing I did was to scroll through the videos for a closer look at what kind of stuff Jamie did. A lot if not most of her content was her on her own, she seemed to have started doing videos with guys kind of recently, and usually as some kind of special 'prize' -- either for reaching a certain number of subscribers, announcing a contest winner (although I now knew that was staged) or celebrating something else. It seemed she took requests, too -- a few videos had titles like "Playing with my favorite toy while you tell me your submission ideas" and things like that. It all made me very flustered, but I pushed that aside.If you're serious about this you've got to get over your hangups. And while a lot of her premium content was her alone it was only those videos that were available for free.

Okay. I told myself.Guess it's time to see this really looks like.

I scrolled through the list, found another 'contest winner' video from a few months before I moved here. Its title was "Contest #5 winner -- fan plays with my pussy and more!". I hit play.

The video began with Jamie already naked, talking to the camera, her hair done up in a bun.

"Hey guys -- I'm here with the latest lucky winner! He's here to show me a good time and I think he's going to enjoy it, too." she winked at the camera, then hopped up on the bed. The camera was on a tripod and faced the bed from its side. A muscular man I did not recognize, also naked climbed up on the bed with her.

"You excited to be here, hun?" she asked.

"I couldn't be more excited."

"I think I can see that." she said with a wicked grin on her face, reached down between his legs and gently started stroking his dick. The guy laughed and groaned a little then climbed a little closer. They kissed as he cupped one of her small but perky breasts. She moaned, lied down on the bed and invitingly spread her legs. The man kissed her neck and moved down. He placed kiss after kiss first on her breasts, down her tummy, down, down, down until his face disappeared between her thighs. I saw Jamie, eyes closed give a gasp and reach up with her arms so her perky breasts were on full display.

Her moans grew deeper and deeper until she sat up and gently pushed him away. The man got up on his knees as Jamie in turn got on hers, bent down and slowly took his cock in her mouth. I intently stared at the man's face: Cleanshaven and handsome, a chiselled jaw; he looked like a soldier. He kept closing his eyes and facing the ceiling, then opening them and looking back down at her, as if to make sure she kept at it. I watched him reach one of his big arms down and place it at the back of her head, to keep her in place and my heart started pounding like a drum.

Mark, to my slight surprise, never really wanted me to go down on him (and he had never gone down on me -- no-one had). I did it once or twice, usually because I was on my period, but very often he never came from it so I stopped bothering. I had supposed I wasn't very good at it (I've since been reliably and repeatedly informed that I am) but he had never acted this way: So... assertive. Jamie seemed to take it in stride as her head slid down further between his thighs and I heard her deep, muffled moans amplify.

Eventually he took his hand and away and she paused before they switched position again, he reclined on the bed as she crawled around and confidently placed her thighs over his face. She gasped as he must have started... well, he must have gotten to it right away and I watched my friend Jamie sit upright, taking a moment just to enjoy herself before she dutifully leaned down and closed her lips around his member again. They went at it for several more minutes until Jamie suddenly stopped, gasped for breath and came -- or at least seemed to. She grabbed one of her breasts and held it firmly as she screamed her orgasm out into the world, then quickly, fumbling, dismounted him.

"You... you... you fucking stud!" she said with a huge grin on her face, still out of breath.

"Did you enjoy that?"

"I did. Let me repay you." she smiled and curled up at the head of the bed, facing the camera. I watched her mouth work his dick for a few more minutes before he let out a deep groan, bucked wildly into the air -- enough that Jamie almost let him slip out of her mouth and then I watched, transfixed as her cheeks bulged and even through my cheap headphones I could hear a swallowing noise.

I stopped the video there, my heart racing, my crotch warm and wet.

Maybe.... maybe a bit much. I thought. I went back to scrolling and another video caught my eye; "Celebrating 300 subscribers with one of my world-famous handjobs -- he comes on my clothes!" First off, I did some quick math: Jamie charged $8.99 a month for a subscription. Nine dollars times three hundred meant she was making about two and a half thousand a month -- at least! She'd been at this for a while, of course, but even a tenth of that would be a huge help, I thought, aware and worried it probably wasn't as easy as that. I clicked the video.

This one was shot with a handheld camera, and from the point of view of a man. Jamie was in her bedroom as usual, though fully clothed -- wearing a clean, thin white blouse. I could see the outline of her bra through it.

"Hi everyone! I'm super-excited for today's video; I'm here with my friend T who's gonna help me celebrate, say hi T!"

"Hi, T! Sooo, what are we here to celebrate?" the man said, and my hands started shaking -- I recognized the voice: T was short for Trevor.

"Last night I got subscriber number three hundred!" Jamie squealed and jumped up and down, excitedly.

"Congratulations! And how are we gonna celebrate?"

"Well... I was thinking I'd jerk you off and show everyone how happy giving handjobs makes me!"

"Alright, I guess that sounds good to me."

"Well, hurry up and get your cock out, then!" And Trevor did. The camera pointed down as his right hand undid his zipper -- halfway through Jamie knelt down and helped him undo his pants and his dick flopped out. My eyes grew wide -- it was big. Perhaps not as big as I'd imagined, but still... big. And he wasn't even that hard yet. Jamie eagerly grabbed his dick and started stroking it. Her hand slowly, gently jerked him and I could clearly hear Trevor grunt in pleasure. Jamie kept talking, telling him how good she felt having a cock in her hand, especially one as nice and big as this one. She kept teasing him by occasionally bringing her face right up to the tip as if to suck it but then stopped just short. She sometimes brought up her other hand to gently massage Trevor's balls and every time she did Trevor's voice quivered.

Finally, with barely a minute left on the video Trevor grew louder and, just like he'd done all those weeks ago, he slammed his hand into the nearest wall and Jamie leaned in, gave the tip of his cock a quick kiss and then Trevor came. Rope after rope of cum shot out from his cock and Jamie, her eyes closed, caught almost all of it on herself. Dark spots appeared on her blouse and some tiny droplets landing on her cheek. Trevor kept going for several seconds before he finally stopped and Jamie gave his cock one last tug, squeezing a final batch from the head which she held in her hand for a moment, smiling naughtily before wiping it out on her blouse.

"Thanks for helping me celebrate and thanks everyone for subscribing!"

"Yeah," Trevor said, out of breath "Thank you."

I lied in bed, my hand already between my legs, and as I made myself come, watching the video back again, I thought to myself:I think I could do that.