Finding Beth Ch. 06

FYI, no sex in this one, it's another build-up chapter - next one coming up is full of action, though.

I spoke to Jamie the next day. I told her I'd looked around a bit more carefully and it hadn't discouraged me (only a slight exaggeration). She asked if I'd looked at the comments as well and I had, after... well, after. She wasn't wrong, some of the comments could be rough. Because you had to be a subscriber to comment, she told me, she had to be careful with removing them -- every comment did represent one person helping her pay her bills, although of course there were limits to what she accepted, and she had in fact on occasion terminated someone's premium account. Most of the comments were positive, but there were plenty commenting on Jamie's looks and figure, lots of people leaving extremely lewd comments (not surprising, perhaps but they did feel extremely personal which felt strange to me) and plenty of people making requests but stating them as demands or else they'd unsubscribe. When I told her I'd watched the 300 subscriber video she confirmed to me she actually had close to 400 subscribers by now and would have to figure something out for that milestone.

"Okay. If you're not deterred then I'm going to support you. What exactly do you want to do?"

"I... don't know." I admitted.

"Do you want me to show you how to set up an OnlyFans?"

"I don't know. I... don't you need a laptop for that?"

"I mean... you can use your phone but it probably won't be quite as good. You could buy a cheap laptop and I still have my old webcam -- it's a bit old now but it was high quality when I got it."

"I... maybe?" I said, feeling horribly embarrassed and silly. Jamie looked at me and slowly opened her mouth, clearly feeling a little awkward.

"Hun, did you... I mean... would you like to... be in one of my videos?" I had to fight to meet her eyes.

"Maybe. Would that, I mean is that -- would that be a problem?"

"I guess... no. We'd have to work out how to, you know, work something out so you get a share but... I guess we could." she paused, another rare moment of her blushing. I told her I had been thinking about the celebration video and that maybe I could do that. She nodded and we talked a bit about details.

Would I like to be alone with the guy? I said I'd prefer it if she were nearby. She suggested that I get every donation that came as a result of that video; she had a system set up where on top of subscriptions people could donate any sum higher than one dollar to each video -- it was a metric she used to show her what brought in the most cash. She said that most videos got between five to ten dollars for a donation but her 'specials' usually brought in up to fifty. She had no idea how much a video with me might bring in.

"I guess people might not really like me."

"I didn't say that, hun" she said, "I said I don't know. Buuuut..." she began, raising an eyebrow, "there's onepretty sure-fire way of making a video a hit."

"What's that?"

"Well, menlove watching two girls together."

I'm pretty sure I died then and there. Jamie quickly cut in:

"I didn't mean -- not like that, calm down! I meant you know... two girls both focusing on the guy. I mean the other thing, yeah, thatreally brings in the cash, but that's not on the table, I know that." I focused on my breathing, kept myself from sayingIt could be. Instead I nodded.

"So... you, me and... some guy and we... jerk him off together?"

"Yeah. A little dirty banter, maybe I show my tits and the guy can come on both of us. Or just on me, if you prefer. That'll sell. Like I said, guyslove watching two girls. I've only done it a few times back in college, but I madecrazy money." I took a deep breath. It was starting to feel real, like I wasactually gonna do this. Was I fuckingnuts?!

"W-who else should be in it?" I said.

"Ah. Yeah, about that" Jamie said a little awkwardly "the thing about that video you watched is that the guy is actually someone you know."

"I know." I replied and Jamie looked surprised.

"Oh. Okay. So... you know it's..."

"Trevor." I filled in.

"Right. Okay. Well. If you'd be okay with that I'm pretty sure he'd be, too. Trevor's incredibly cool about working with me, he doesn't judge me for what I do and he's never tried to push for anything except what we agreed upon in advance. He just shows up, we shoot, he gets his rocks off and then we go out for drinks. So I'm sure he'd be cool with you, but won't it make things... awkward for you? I mean at work."

I was a long time answering.Yes it might, I thought to myself. But the truth was, Trevor and I almost always worked different shifts, and if he was as a cool of a guy as he seemed and Jamie said he was, then... then...I want his cock in my hands and in my mouth, the voice in my head stated, succinctly.

I told Jamie I was okay with it.

We talked a bit more and Jamie told me she'd talk to Trevor. She went over exactly what I wanted him to know and I asked her to not let him know I was strapped for cash. She promised not to and asked if I wanted him to know I was new at this. I had to think about it for a moment, then asked her for advice.

"Be honest. Let him know it's your first time doing porn." I nodded and agreed. I didn't want Trevor knowing I was so inexperienced, in general but I guess I wouldn't be able to hide how new I was at doing... this.Porn.

I'm going to do porn. I thought to myself, the idea making my head spin and my heart flutter.

It was three days later that I sat in Jamie's sofa, anxiously waiting for Trevor to show up. I was wearing a dark-blue skirt and a light-green blouse that showed off a little cleavage, but no more. I'd spent an hour applying, removing and reapplying my makeup before trying on at least four outfits -- none of which felt appropriate. I guess I didn't have any porn-y outfits. Jamie said I looked great, however.

"Trevor's gonna love it." I hoped so. I hoped everyone else would. Jamie came back from the kitchen with a cup of tea -- she'd told me she usually didn't drink alcohol before performing with someone and she wasn't super comfortably offering me something alcoholic right now; she thought it could easily devolve into pushing yourself beyond what you were comfortable with and she wasn't about that.

We talked through what we'd agreed between all three of us, Jamie checking that I was okay with every step still: Trevor would come over, we'd chat for a while then when I felt ready we'd move into the bedroom. She would introduce me (though not by name) and tell everyone I was a special guest. Then we would start. I would keep all my clothes on, though as the shoot went on Jamie might take her top off, depending on the mood. If I felt comfortable me and Jamie would take turns jerking him off and when it was time for him to come Jamie would leave it entirely up to me how and where that happened. I nodded quietly but she made me say outright if I was still okay with it all. Then she looked me in the eye:

"There's never a point where you can't back out or call for a break, okay? You're not disappointing anyone, you're not pissing anyone off and you don't owe anyone anything, got it? You can say no at any. Step. Got that?" I nodded and smiled, took her hand and thanked her for letting me do this.

"Honestly, if you really want to do this moving forward, I'm happy for you hun, and I'll support and help you every step of the way." the day she'd brought over some paper work for me to sign. One was a consent form for me to appear in adult content on her website, the other a simple contract entitling me to any donations accrued for this video. I'd told Jamie the latter wasn't necessary but she insisted it was safer this way, that way there wouldn't be any misunderstandings.

The door rang and I think I died again. Jamie gently patted my leg, got up and let Trevor in. They kissed each other on the cheek and Trevor hung up his jacket. He was simply dressed in a white t-shirt and jeans. I got up to say hi and my knees nearly buckled but I managed to stumble forwards and say something -- I genuinely can't remember and neither can Trevor or Jamie. Jamie led us back to the couch where we sat for a moment in silence before Trevor said:

"So... guess I didn't expect this." I blushed. We'd had a very brief three-way text message exchange where we all confirmed dates and stuff, but it was the first time I'd seen him since me and Jamie set this in motion. I couldn't look him in the eye. Jamie stepped in:

"Just to make everything clear: Beth here won't take off her clothes, you won't touch her except in ways she asks you to. If we feel like it, I might take something off and you can ask to touch me in the video. We can pause at any time Beth asks for it-" she looked around "or anyone else, obviously. We'll pause, talk, then either stop entirely, change something or keep going, depending on how we all feel -- but Beth in particular. Okay Beth?" I nodded, but when Jamie kept looking at me I had to croak out:

"Yes, okay." she turned to Trevor.

"Okay Trev?"

"Yes m'am."

"Good. And Beth, remember -- it's not live, I edit the crap out of all my videos so us stopping and talking something over is not going to ruin anything. Okay?"

"Okay." I smiled, feeling incredibly awkward but also so thankful to Jamie. She really was so focused on me feeling safe. I looked over to Trevor. He was seated on a chair and I suddenly realized he was looking at me, too. He smiled.

"You look really nice, Beth." It was such a simple thing, said so sincerely. I felt my entire soul lift up and suddenly realized I could do this. More than that, I wanted to. I stood up.

"Hey guys? If you're ready I think I'd like to start."