Following Laura's Footsteps

She gave me a withering look of disgust, "I don't see what that girl sees in you. You've worked with her for years, surely she's mentioned her son David once or twice? And you don't even remember his name?"

Oh fuck, of course, her son! My immediate jealousy at the mere mention of a male name had clouded my mind. Not to mention I was shivering like crazy.

I just shook my head, "sorry, brain fart," was the best I could offer.

I was so happy to see the second bus arriving. It wasn't all that warm in there, but definitely warmer than outside.

"How long for this one?"

"Thirty minutes," came the terse reply.

I was still shivering occasionally by the time we reached the next stop. Bored, I was studying the mat they used for flooring down the centre of the bus. I could see the system was designed for someone to walk in with a high pressure hose and clean the bus out quickly. But the matting had a flaw. The design didn't allow it to drain itself after and dry easily. I stored that for future reference. You never knew where business would take us.

The bus itself was an education in poor design. A ring of metal piping formed the seat with a metal bar running behind my head. I could only imagine the whiplash damage to my skull if we were in an accident. Plastic vinyl seats formed a pew-like bench giving little comfort. The bus was obviously fairly old and looked it. Tired faded colours, dirty windows and a faint odour of decay. The motor was noisy and made conversation difficult.

Despite the cold I wasn't sorry to leave it behind when we got off at the next stop, "what now Mrs Carrington?" I asked.

"We walk," she said setting out, "and you can call me Mamma, everyone does."

Three blocks later we arrived at one of those huge, cut-price grocery stores.

"When's the last time you went grocery shopping?" she asked.

"It's been years," I admitted.

"Well, you're in for a treat," she grinned, handing me a list, "this is the cheapest grocery store in the city."

Why did I get the feeling I wouldn't find it a treat. I scanned her list, I could do this.

I grabbed a buggy and headed out.

"I'll wait for you at the cashier," she called out.

The shopping was a shock. Prices for food were sky high in my opinion. Meat prices in particular made you feel like someone was sticking a gun to your head. To pass the time I started a game in my head trying to guess the price before I found the item. In almost every case I was miles too low on my guesses. Stuff was expensive.

I finished feeling proud of myself, then had to wait in a long line up. There weren't enough cashiers open. At least it was warm though. I finally got through and the till rang up a little over $280.00.

I held my hand out for my wallet and Mamma fished it out, "oh goody," she said hauling out some of the $5,000 cash I kept in it, "I was afraid I'd have to pay for this part."

She handed me $200.

I pointed at the till, "it's $280."

She pointed at the pile of food on the conveyor belt, "that's what two people need to survive," then pointed to the cash in my hand, "that's what Laura can afford. You'll have to give some of it back."

"Oh come on," I whined. "Just give me the cash or my credit card. I'll give it all to her."

"You're a smart man Chris. Laura makes these decisions all the time. Surely you're just as tough as she is, aren't you?" the snide tone in her voice making me believe she thought anything but!

I was never so embarrassed in my life. Obviously the meat had to go back. I tried to pick what I thought would be nutritious and go a long way, but honestly I had no clue. Really, no clue. Someone took care of all this for me and someone else paid.

The long line up was muttering nasty words at me while I sorted through and made decisions. I finally managed to get the bill down under $200 and we escaped the store, me clutching four bags of heavy groceries in my arms.

Outside I turned to Mamma, "OK, I get it. I'll give her a raise."

She slapped me so quickly I never saw the blow coming. I staggered and almost dropped the groceries, her palm print burning hot on my face.

"Don't you dare think this is just about money," I had this teensy, five foot ball of rage in my face snarling at me, "you don't know the half of it. You just shut up and keep doing what you're told."

I was six feet tall, yet I quailed in front of this demonic woman.

"This way asshole," she muttered, walking away. I meekly followed behind carrying those heavy bags.

By the time we'd walked the three blocks back to the bus stop the groceries were starting to weigh heavy in my arms.

"Could we get a taxi for all this," I asked.

She gave me a scary look.

"Maybe not," I caved.

She looked at her watch, "pity you took so long in that grocery store, we missed our bus. The next one will be along in forty-five minutes."

Forty-five minutes later I was pacing frantically up and down the bus stop trying to stay warm. My arms felt like lead, going numb trying to hold onto the bags. I could feel my mind getting clouded, not thinking so well anymore. I was headed into the first stage of hypothermia.

I was happy to see this bus, but Mamma had to fish in my pockets for my pass. Apparently I needed to know to have it out before grabbing all the groceries. I couldn't put them down because it was too wet and the bags would get soggy and break. She informed me next time I fucked up she'd leave me standing on the sidewalk.

A thirty minute bus ride holding onto those damn groceries took us to our next stop. I couldn't put them down, it was standing room only and the seats were full.

The bus itself was a disaster. A loud noisy motor belched out huge clouds of black smoke that seemed to permeate every inch of material inside. The rubber matting was worn down to the metal floor. The seats were ripped and torn. Several stanchions that were supposed to allow people to brace themselves while standing were missing. I had no idea they had such decrepit vehicles in the transit fleet. The unshaven driver was a slob, shirt untucked, cigarette hanging from his mouth despite the many defaced no smoking signs that decorated the bus. He screamed a litany of profanities at more than one vehicle on the road that caught his ire. I heard him outright proposition a woman getting off the bus. It was disgusting!

The city outside had changed. Recessed entryways into vacated stores often featured drunks or drug riddled bums sleeping their binges off, their shopping carts with their worldly goods parked close by. Broken-down houses that hadn't seen paint in years lined the route. Boarded up windows were everywhere marking abandonment, or the lack of money to make even simple repairs. Every so often there would be a place kept neat and clean, but it was an outlier, trying to stand in the face of a hurricane of poverty.

The next stop was an eye opener. The windows had been busted out of the bus shelter and old posters hung in ragged chunks off the remaining support frame and leftover glass. The floor was filthy with cigarette butts, broken glass and other debris that defied description. I couldn't even imagine the last time it was cleaned. Mamma set out on a brisk walk and I trailed behind carrying those damn groceries.

If Laura could do this, I could do it.

Down the street I could see some kids playing catch despite the cold. Closer though, two rough looking characters stepped into our path.

"Mamma?" one asked questioningly, eyeing me suspiciously.

"It's OK Mike, he's Laura's boss."

"Laura's boss? This is the bastard?" his eyes said it all, the contempt clear. A contempt he backed up by spitting a gob of phlegm on my expensive suit pants. I shifted the grocery bags looking down in disbelief at the spittle running down my trousers. The other guy muttered "asshole," at me and the two walked away.

Mamma's face was impassive watching me.

"I.....I," words were failing me.

"Laura's well liked, you may find yourself rather unpopular around here," she offered and started walking again.

The area was a slum with poorly maintained tenement buildings lining the street. There were broken-down cars that had been stripped and abandoned. Others reduced to burnt-out blackened hulks. The people looked rough and unsavoury.

I got dumb and asked, "does Laura walk through here at night?"

I knew I wasn't going to like the answer when Mamma's face turned bright red.

"What a stupid question Chris? You keep some late hours at times and she's always been there with you. Yes, she walks through here late at night. In the rain, the snow, the cold. What the fuck do you think Chris? After that long, miserable, close to two hour bus ride home, when she's often forced to wait at dark, lonely bus stops. Times she has to carry those groceries through here late at night because you think nothing of working her weekends, leaving her no time to do shopping. Nor do you pay her extra for the overtime. Have I mentioned the nights it's been so late the buses were shut down and she had to dig into her and David's grocery money to pay for a taxi home? She needs the charity of a food bank when that happens, or they starve!"

She was literally spitting out the last words.

I was speechless. I'd never given the slightest consideration to her getting home whenever we worked late. I just assumed. Oh shit, there was that word. It was an old joke, but so true.

I remembered watching Tony Randall from an old TV episode of the Odd Couple doing a courtroom scene where he scribbles the word 'assume' on a blackboard in response to a witness testifying; she assumed something.

When you assume, you make an Ass of U and Me!

I was an ass to assume everything was OK for her!

By this time we'd reached the kids game and a young boy came running over, "Gramma!"

Mamma hugged him, "David, this is Chris, your mom's boss."

His demeanour soured immediately and I knew I wasn't on his wanna-get-to-know-ya list. I tried to divert him.

"Do you like baseball?"

He nodded.

"What positions do you play?"

"I like first base," he admitted.

I looked at his mitt. It was a catcher's mitt, badly frayed and the stitching barely holding it together. How the hell do you play first base with a catchers mitt? His clothes were neat and clean, but well worn and faded.

I stuck my foot in my mouth, "ever been to a major league game?"

He stared at me like he'd just found dog shit on his runners. He raged at me, "no, never! Thanks to you there's too much month at the end of the money."

"David," Mamma said cautioning him.

"I hear you and mom talking!" he shouted angrily over his shoulder, running back to his game.

I was gutted. I'd just been handed one of the most humiliating moments of my life by an eight year old.

"I should be sorry for his behaviour, but I can't say I am," Mamma said.

"No, don't apologize. He's right. This is entirely my fault and I'm going to fix it."

"This? This is only the beginning Chris," she said, turning into a building.

Only the beginning?

My mind clutched at that thought in disbelief. How much worse could this get?

Feeling uneasy, I followed Mamma into the building.

I would eat that thought. Worse didn't even start to cover it.

To put it politely the building stank. Obviously it wasn't being maintained. The stale cooking odours were overwhelming. The stench of piss, rot and unwashed people made me want to vomit. The elevator had a torn, well-used out-of-order sign that looked like it had been there for years, so we walked up three floors.

Inside Laura's apartment I looked around and my heart broke. A clearly salvaged kitchen table and two chairs, scratched, dented and broken in places. A tiny loveseat, the rips covered with duct tape, faced a twelve inch rear projection TV. Something I hadn't seen in years.

Mamma noticed me looking at the TV, "it doesn't work and she can't afford to fix it, or buy a new one. Even if she could, she can't afford cable."

"Come here," she waved me over to a closed door. I opened it and just about fell over. Lying on the floor in one corner was a kid's mattress and a single one in the other corner. A sheet had been hung around the bigger mattress for privacy. Beside the small bed there was a fir bough pinned to the wall with a few Christmas lights attached to it. Underneath there were a couple of small wrapped presents. Further on, a few books were piled alongside a tiny reading lamp.

"Laura and David share the room," Mamma indicated.

I barely made it to the badly stained sink before puking up my rather expensive breakfast.

How could I have been so blind?

Done this to the woman I loved?

I turned from the sink tears blurring my eyes, "I can fix this Mamma."

Again, I never saw the blow coming. I was down on my knees, my face stinging. God that woman had a nasty right hook.

She was raging over top of me, "you think this is just about Laura? You pathetic idiot! Think about the bigger picture. Probably close to half your employees are living like this you pay them so poorly."

Wha...?" I gasped. Half my employees?

"Your people believe in you Chris, but you've let them down living in that palace of yours, ordering damn near a quarter of a million dollars worth of expensive scotch. Yes, I heard about that. Your employees are starving. David has never been to a dentist. Did you know that?"

"But we have dental insurance."

"Yes, fifty percent. But where does the other fifty percent come from? If she spends money on dental she has to give even more back at the grocery till and MY DAUGHTER AND GRANDSON DON'T EAT. The same with doctors and prescriptions. Many of your employees are suffering. Lots only get through the month with the charity of food banks."

Jesus, I was horrified. What had I done? I sat on the floor uncaring about my expensive clothes and cried my heart out. Was it all true? Had I been so oblivious? So many suffering from my neglect?

Mamma sat herself on the floor beside me and pulled my head into her lap stroking my hair.

"You were a good man once Chris. You had fire in your belly looking for success. You inspired Laura and a lot of other people to follow you and work hard to help build your business. Somewhere along that path you lost sight of them. You've gotten carried away with pampering yourself while ignoring their welfare. Yet Laura has never once criticized you despite everything you've seen today. That girl is madly in love with you and completely loyal."

That penetrated, a ray of hope shone down on me, "Laura loves me?"

"Yes, she does. In my opinion she's beyond stupid about you. But no more Chris. Your competition has offered her three times what you pay her. They'd like her to start right after Christmas. They've been after her for years because she knows the business inside and out. She's turned them down every time out of loyalty to you. I told her if she turned this one down, I wouldn't help her anymore. I've been assisting her out with my small pensions best that I can. But as you can see, it isn't enough. She needs to give them an answer by today and then she's history. She'll be gone. It's an abomination that a wonderful hardworking person like her and my grandson should be living like this."

There was no time to lose. I needed Laura like the air I breathe or the food I eat. She'd been with me almost since the beginning. A good part of the success I'd enjoyed was due to her. Not that I was discounting the untold hours other employees had given me so freely when we started out.

For the first time in my life I found myself not liking myself. How could I have been so blind, so egotistical and missed all this? Despite professing to love her I'd never even given Laura or any of my other employees' circumstances the slightest thought. I had been self-centred and vain. Here was a woman who had my back through thick and thin, ignoring her own terrible personal circumstances that my inattention had clearly put her into.

She'd never complained once!

It was time to take control. I struggled to my feet, wiped the tears away and held out my hand, "My wallet and phone please."

Mamma got a stubborn look on her face.

"Mamma we can take that long bus ride back and if you insist, I'll do it. I'll learn some more, but I get it. You're a hundred percent right. It's after one o'clock now and I need to get on this NOW. A minute lost is a problem not solved. I need to get some staff in and start working to fix all this."

My emotions took over and I made a heartfelt plea, "Please Mamma, I can't lose Laura! I just can't!" I stood there with tears running down my face begging for a shred of mercy.

She reluctantly handed my stuff over. I'm sure she felt the need to torture me more and I couldn't blame her. I'd been a complete ASS with a capital "A".

"Get David ready, we'll be leaving as soon as my car is here."

**********

Laura's eyes got real big when the three of us and Henry walked into the office.

"Mamma, what have you done?" she probed cautiously.

"Something that should have been done years ago!" She plopped herself down on a couch, "any of that fancy coffee around?"

"Sweetie, could you make us all one and maybe find a pop for David. I need Sheila in HR up here now. Whatever she's doing, tell her to drop it."

"Sweetie?" she gasped, her eyes bugging out again.

"Honey, I've been an idiot about you and I got a lot more to apologize to you for. But right now my employees are suffering and I need to fix things. By the way, here's your new salary," scribbling on a piece of paper.

She looked at the paper and nervously hiccuped, then looked at me with tears in her eyes. I knew it was four times what she was making now, but I owed her big time. Not that she was going to be around working for long if I had anything to say about it. I had other plans for her future. Plans for our future together. I could only hope she'd accept me after the disaster I'd caused.

I waved Henry into my office once we all had coffee.

"I need you to take Laura, her mom and David out shopping today. I'm going to reserve them a hotel room across the street until I can figure out something else. There's no way she's going back to that shithole she's living in. But they'll need clothes and personal items."

"Walmart?" he queried.

"Nope, take her to all the best shops in town. Dresses, pants, shoes, purses, toiletries, underwear. Whatever she needs and as much as she wants. Use the corporate credit card. Oh, and take David to a sports shop and let him buy anything his heart desires, but most definitely a good baseball mitt."

"Any idea of how much?"

"I don't care. Ten grand, twenty, fifty, it doesn't matter, get her and David what they need. And let Mamma pick out something nice too. Just keep her away from any stores selling brass knuckles. In fact, you should grab one of those sports coats you've always admired."

"Boss, those coats are three grand!" he gasped.

"In that case get two. Seriously Henry, things are going to change around here and there will be good things coming. I owe you and a lot of others around here for my success and it's time I started paying back."

His back was noticeably straighter when he strode out my door to collect his charges.

Sheila, our Director of Human Resources knocked on my door.

I waved her over to the couch and chair and joined her.

It was time to be direct, "how much less than the competition are we paying?"

"You want me to sugar coat it, or tell you the truth?"

"Things need to change Sheila, so lets deal with the plain unvarnished truth."

"Twenty to thirty percent less, inferior benefit plan and no retirement plan," she stated.

Shit, that was worse than I thought! How had we got to this place I wondered. I knew I'd tried to run a tight financial ship, but this was ridiculous. It made me realize I'd always pushed Sheila off when she wanted to talk about salaries and industry averages for compensation. I'd been far too focused on paying the company's debts off fast. It was a wonder I still had anyone working for me.