All Comments on 'Forbidden: Rivalry'

cageysea9725 shut the fuck up all you do it troll people stories on here either write another or shut the fuck up and stop trolling. This was a damn good story it shows heather growing into a stronger more confident person and show's colt trying to keep his anger in check 5 stars from me keep up the great work

Needs another chapter defeating Jarods charms while completing internship

This was GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you.

Oof first commenter is super gross for a person with no submissions of their own. Only a single word in the whole story tripped me up, which is 100% better than a lot of the writing on this site.

Anyways. I came here as fast as I could from the 3 part series and this was a great one shot to wrap it up! The flow of the writing was the perfect pace for me.

Gee that was hard to read. A really tough spot in the relationship. I hope in future parts we find the threat is not real and heather is able to resist Jarod everytime. It woul ruin the story if he got into her pants or into anything really.

I dislike Colton being abusive to Heather. There's a fine line between dominance and abuse. Even if Heather likes the abuse, it is STILL abuse. If Heather is getting off on the abuse, that's not truly consent. Heather is broken because of how she was raised. The Heather you created for your story has a mental illness. The question is whether or not you imagined her this way for drama or if you made her this way unconsciously.

Either way, her relationship with Colton is very disturbing. 😳

The tenderness that Colton managed to eek out at the end of this chapter was the only redeeming moment in this installment. 2/5

Oh yeah, I almost forgot to recommend that you fire your editor...

"Colt though, he never excepted never having a choice. I think that's what made him so angry all the time. Me, I like having my path laid out for me."

Yeah, it should have read, "he never accepted never having a choice..."

I'm glad you finally showed tenderness to Heather. If she wanted abuse she could have stayed at home with her dad. I also hope you can keep her strong in her refusal to sleep with Jarod.