All Comments on 'Forbidden Waters'

And you won't have many here if you continue to submit such short pieces.

All mothers and sons should experience such uninhibited love

Seeing the other comment, I re-read the story (which did NOT take long) and see that the answer is in the very last paragraph.

If it had been revealed that the narrator was a daughter, the single bed, sharing showers bit would be more acceptable as written. But since it is the 18 year old son, the story requires a whole lot more explanation to be well received by the reader community.

Still, off to a good start as a writer, keep going!

By that I mean the only things I can comment on really are your spelling and grammar. No mistakes that I would fault, and the basic premise seemed sound.

It was very abrupt, cramming in a lot of background into a short space.

As it is, I give it 3 stars, and encourage you to keep going with it.

Weak ass son

very fast read... is the person telling the story a son or daughter? a lot of unanswered thoughts and very quickly written.... this would be great for a one page contest... but not quite a story good enough to get one off...