Girlfriend with Testing Device Ch. 21

But those happy memories weren't real, were they? They were stolen little moments. That was my happiness - Ellen's happiness - not hers. I thought back to the fight in the restaurant. I'd never seen them fight before. Never seen her mad at him like that, hurt like that... My throat went dry and my heart pounded hot at the memory.

What if the love that I knew they had - that perfect love - was an illusion? What if they weren't a happy couple that I knew them to be. What if they were... well, something else?

Ellen had done a number on Evan with the device - though, thinking about it now, he was much cuter as a girl than as a guy - but she had cared for him. I shuddered to think what someone could do, what someone could have already done, if they didn't.

That was the offer. It was happiness, at a price I'd never miss, but it meant condemning Evan to Elizabeth's arms.

My breathing became ragged.

"Please," I said. "Please, there must be some other way."

"I'm sorry, I wish that there was. But this is the way it has to be."

"What if I got the device back? What if you let me go and I go out there and I bring it back?"

"It's too late for that, Slut, I'm sorry." you sighed. "If you had showed up here, today, having gotten the device back from Elizabeth already, then yes, fine, okay, we can sweep the worst of this under the rug, frame it up all pretty and make it seem like an interesting data point, but I have a deadline. I have people I need to report back to. It's not our job to bail you out of your mess."

"It's not your job to fix things, you're right. It's mine." I locked eyes with you. "You said it yourself! This thing is my responsibility, right? Well, I'm ready to take that opportunity. Give me a chance to fix this. Give me a chance to get it back for you."

"Look, I appreciate what you're offering. But if you somehow tip off that we're coming for her its just going to make things all the more difficult for us in the long run."

"This is my life on the line!"

"No!"

"Please."

"No. Slut, I'm sorry." you sighed. "I really am."

"Please..." I said, quietly this time. I could barely hear myself through the tears. "I... I just want to save Evan. I... I love him. Ellen loved him, so much. I don't care what happens to me, make me a happy idiot forever for all I care... but Evan... he deserves better than that. I'm the one who got him into this mess and I can't bear the thought that he's suffering because of me. Because even if you fix things, make it so no one remembers, no one notices... him and Elizabeth are going to be unhappy together. She'll use him and spit him out and he won't know what happened to their perfect happiness and it'll break his heart. And I... even if I don't know we ever dated... I would never in a million years want that."

"Jesus."

"So please, I don't care if you make me dumb in the end... just... just let me try to save the boy I love."

You furrowed your brow and tapped your foot anxiously.

"Fine!" you said, finally, throwing your hands up. "Fine! I'll go home and report that you forgot to bring the device to the meeting - which is technically true - and that you wanted to reschedule for tomorrow. They won't like it, but its not worth losing a client over. "

"Does that mean?"

"You have one day. One! No more! No extensions, no narrow misses, and if the next time I see you, even if you've got your head on the body of a german shepherd, I'm not going to bail you out again!"

"Thank you!" I leapt at you, arms wrapping around in a tight hug, the fur of your pillowy chest absorbing my tears.

"Hold on, hold on!" you said, stepping back. "I'm not done! There are conditions! I want debriefs from everyone who used the thing. That means Evan, Emma, and Elizabeth, okay? I'll get interviews from them one way or another, but this saves me the trouble of tracking them all down. Plus, the promise of extra data will at least make this whole mess a little more palatable to my superiors."

"Wait, does that mean they'll know everything? Like I do now?"

"Briefly. Once I've gotten their story, I'll wipe their awareness of the device and all the changes, just like I should be doing to you. It's not worth risking letting any more liabilities running around. Then you get wiped too."

"What!?"

"Come on," you sighed, "we've been over this. Trust me, its for the best. And it's just about the device. Everyone carries on like everything's is perfectly normal. "

"But things aren't normal! I can't leave things like this. I can't leave Evan like this, thinking he and Elizabeth had always been a couple!"

"Then you'd better fix whatever you can before you bring that thing back, but like I said. You have one day as of when we met tonight. After that, I get my device back one way or another."

"There's no way I could convince you to not erase our memory?"

"Look, just get the thing back first, then we'll discuss your options, okay?"

"I... I'll do my best." I took a breath. "Its literally my life on the line, isn't it?"

"I-I really shouldn't be doing this, you know." you said, "I could get into serious shit for this."

"I know. I can't even begin to tell you how grateful I am. This is a chance to set things right, and its maybe more than I deserve." I looked up at you. "But look," my voice caught in my throat "there's... there's one more thing I need to ask from you."

"What now?"

I agonized over the decision. I hated myself for thinking it. For thinking it needed to be done. But it was the best chance we had. I... I didn't know if I could deal with Elizabeth. I could confront her, sure, but I loved her too much. I was too soft. She could use that against me. I wanted to believe she wouldn't, but I knew her too well. I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. This was the only way. This was how it needed to be.

"You said I was smart before, right? Clever? When I was Ellen, I mean. "

"I did."

"Can you... can you turn me back? Into her? Again?"

"What?"

"I want you to turn me back into Ellen. The way she was originally, before all this."

"I- yes, I could." you looked over at your machine. "If this is about being smart though, you know I could just roll you back to before she switched away your education instead, right? It would be just as easy."

"I thought about that, actually. It's tempting. It's really, really tempting. But no. Look, what happened to me... I hate it. I hate that she did it. Don't get me wrong, I love my life. I'm happier being Slut than I ever was as Ellen. But... but this isn't who I'm supposed to be."

"Aren't you the one who gets to decide who you're supposed to be?"

"I am." I smiled sadly. "And this is the choice I'm making. Ellen... she loves Evan more than anyone, more than I ever could. When I think back to all the memories I have of him and Elizabeth, all those happy moments, I cry because I so desperately want to be a part of that happiness. And now that I know that those moments are all just stolen fragments of my life...?"

I took a drink, then continued.

"Ellen... she's a stick in the mud and she doesn't even like cheerleading and she's a total prude, but she's who I originally was. She's who Evan fell in love with. I... I don't know how he'd feel about me. Not after all I've done. But Ellen loves Evan more than life itself, so for her, for them, I'm willing to give up the life I have now to give her a shot at the life she should have had." I looked down at the tears falling into my cup. "Besides, I had a chance to confront Elizabeth and all I did was run. If anyone deserves to rescue Evan, if anyone deserves to stop Elizabeth, its her."

"I - are you sure?" your brow was raised. "You seemed pretty upset about having to turn back into the way you are now. If you go through with this Ellen probably won't volunteer to turn back."

"I know. I'm sure. Trust me, making other people happy is what I'm all about. The least I can do is make myself happy every now and then."

"Alright, well, I can't undo any of the physical stuff, but I'll roll you back to Thursday and reset your awareness to full again. I guess at the very least you'll be able to see all the changes that have been made thus far, though of course not any that happen beyond this point.

"Thank you."

You offered me one of the machine's tendrils. I took it with a trembling hand and held on as tight as I was able.

"Oh! and tell Stacey that I'm sorry. They'll probably have to find someone else for their orgies for now on. And tell Kiley that I wanted to thank her for- "

Zzzzttttt

Hot tears were running down my face. I wiped at them confusion. Though those thoughts now seemed so foreign, my brain was still awash in emotion. I had just said a very difficult goodbye.

"Am I me again?" I asked.

"You tell me."

"Fuck!" I screamed as I looked down. "Why am I naked again!?"

I rushed to put on the clothes that had been left on the table, not even bothering to seek out privacy this time. Its not like anyone was looking.

"Look," you said, "what you just did - what the other you just did..."

"I... yeah... wow." I furrowed my brow. "She sacrificed herself to give me a second chance, didn't she? For Evan. For us. I... I didn't know I had it in me. Fuck, I guess I'd better not waste it."

I flexed my hand. I still had those stupid perfectly manicured nails, but holy shit, I was back. I thought I was done for, that I'd given myself up into perpetual bimbohood for the chance that someone would be able to put things right. I guess Slut had done the same for me. I felt weirdly proud of me. I frowned. Maybe I'd been too hard on myself...

"Listen, Ellen, I know you want to get your boyfriend back, but this is both of us taking a risk on this okay? Please be careful. Remember, in so far as the world is concerned, you're still Slut. If you don't act like it, you're going to get found out."

Shit, I hadn't thought of that. How did Slut act? I tried to think back to some of the things that I had been doing over the past few days. Oh my god, I'd been the tasty centerpiece in an enormous bisexual swapped up cheerleader-football orgy.

I bit my lip and blushed a little. Fuck, why did that memory turn me on so much? Stupid horny body.

Anxiety started to build up in the back of my mind. What had that idiot me have been thinking? How did I think that I would be better at fixing things like this?

I thought back to everything that had happened, to the story I had just told. There had to be something in there I could use. I was aware now. That was good. More aware than Slut. I knew everything. I could remember every swap from the past week, see through them all, even though I wasn't aware at the time. There was a clarity about it now. Oh my god, I'd been so dumb when I'd had the device. All those stupid, selfish things I'd done. I'd been so self absorbed.

Evan... oh my god. He was so different now. What had I done to him? I had to help him, I had to save him. I had to turn him back, to put things to right. Who knew what Elizabeth was doing to him right now? Not that I hadn't done my own share of damage, and not that she hadn't wounded me too. I looked down at my body. This form was like a scar. Slut's stupid jiggly sexy body and her constant horny yearnings a persistent reminder of what I'd lost. I gripped my fist.

"Ellen? How are you feeling?"

"I think the weight of everything that's happened has started to kick in."

"Maybe next time you get a reality altering super device, you don't tell your psychotic friend, okay?"

"There's going to be a next time?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Not for you. Ugh. We're probably going to have to start introducing rigorous more screening protocols from now on. Who knows what'll happen if some other crazy girl gets her hand on one of our remotes."

I shook my head. Just imagining the chaos that could ensue. I had thought it sounded fun once, but now the idea was absolutely terrifying.

"Alright," you said, finishing your coffee. "I think we're done here. For now. I'll meet you back here tomorrow, same time as our appointment was today. Don't be late and don't try to do anything stupid, okay? If we have to send a team to track you down its going to look really bad on my file."

You stood up and set your briefcase down on the table. Your machine scuttled over and sat down inside it, waving one of its little arms behind it.

"Uh, Frank?" I said.

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

"Huh?"

"Thank you. For pulling me out of that, for giving me this chance."

"Yeah , well." you blushed. "Just don't screw it up. I've already taken care of the bill. You get home safe, okay?"

I nodded.

You turned and left for the door.

"Oh and Ellen?" You said, turning back to look at me.

"Yeah?"

"Good luck."

You flashed me that catlike smile one last time as you stepped outside. The pouring rain somehow failed to land even a drop on you.

I frowned and looked down at my own cup. It had been empty for some time.

I needed to get home. I needed to think, to come up with a plan. I needed to - oh my god my house was full of dildoes. I had a butt plug collection that would make a sex shop blush. Fuck, Slut had been proud of it, too, she'd put them on my bookshelves for everyone to see.

It was weird. I remembered everything that happened while I was Slut, but I was becoming increasingly aware that I wasn't her. I had none of her memories, her history. I had no idea where I diverged from what everyone else currently believed was reality. I felt like a stranger, like I was possessing a body that wasn't my own, stealing a life that wasn't mine. Talk about ironic.

I shook my head. Okay, whatever. It was fine. It was temporary. I could fix it. I just needed to get the device back. Once I had that I could try to fix things. I'd figure it out then. I had a whole fucking life to put back together.

But what if I couldn't find the people Elizabeth had swapped me with? What then? Pretend to be Slut for the rest of my life? Or use the device to swap myself back to normal, swapping Slut away piecemeal into the lives of others. I shuddered. Could I do that? After everything that had happened?

I shook my head again. One step at a time.

I thought back to Evan. Not sexy girl Evan, but plain average guy Evan. The way he'd been before all this. He used to look at me like I was the only thing in the whole universe that mattered. My heart boiled over at the thought that there was a good chance he'd never look at me that way again, worse, that he had never even done that to begin with.

I clenched my first as I thought back to all the awful things that I had done to him. I had traded away his smile, and then forgotten that it the him underneath that was important. That was something I'd never forget again.

I had one day, no plan, and it was raining, but I was me again.

It was time to fight back.

To be continued in Chapter 22: Fighting Back