All Comments on 'Head Coach'

Well done, dude! Much better title than the one I suggested. Adding Cersei Lannister was another nice touch. :)

Well written and nicely described, with interesting characters...to a point.

The story was told in a friendly, almost whimsical way,

Good Story. I'm trying to figure out why Mrs. Audrey makes me think of Amanda (and Jace) from qhml1's An Unexpected Reaction.

Sorry, pressed the wrong button. So, as I was saying.

The story was was told in a friendly, almost whimsical way, but unfortunately it didn't disguise the fact tha all three turned out to be lying, cheating arseholes. Hunter managed to cure Coline of lesbianism with a stroke of his mighty cock, a shame he couldn't succeed with his wife's similar affliction. It was pretty obvious that Coline was Wendy's lover the moment she said she was a lesbian. I confess I did think they would end up in a loving threesome, so congratulations on the final twist. However, to enjoy a story one has to like at least one character, in the end I found that I didn't give a fuck about what happened to any of the distasteful bastards, and I was just thankful they weren't in my world.

Maybe they found the partner they needed in the end!

5

Nice twist to an age old story. Here's a thought. They ghosted her for lying. BUT, everybody lies. Are they going to remain monogamous? I would have gone for the three way. I didn't see Wendy as being so bad. Certainly not evil. D

We're on Lit and we know it's all about sex, quality and quantity......

But it's rare these days to have had just one partner in your life.

Lying, betrayal... always have more impact and more consequences on people even if there's no sexual relationship in the middle.

So, in the end, we have 3 liars, 3 deceivers and 3 betrayers.

None is better than the other, but all see the other as the villain.

It's always the other's fault, because it can't be mine.

Loved the story, Jalibar! Very glad you didn't have them become a throuple. Wendy shouldn't have been rewarded for her lying and cheating.

And thank you for pointing out Cagiva. I never knew (stupid me, eh?) that Cagivagurl's name was derived from a motorcycle manufacturer.

Fun story. I really enjoyed it. The clues were there but I really didn't see the twist coming at first. Keep it up

Could see that coming a mile away. Still well written, fun story to read and a good change of pace. Thanks.

I really like it - intelligent, believable, generous.

I liked the story good read but the plot was very see through as soon as Coline said she was a lesbian

Fun read but Colin’s was at his house having sex in his marital bed. There were no pictures anywhere in the house with Wendy and him? Slight oversight, I know, but just trying to help you with the nuances of plot development. Great was and well written- 4.5*

Have to admit I really liked this one, even though it starts off with a cheating and sneaky wife who was keeping important information from her husband. There's a certain amount of Karma in this, buy my only question is how did Wendy not know that Coline worked with her husband ?

Suspending my belief in that one thing let's me give this the 5 stars I think it deserves, and I also caught the bike reference to Cagivagurl, who IS a good storyteller!

Thank you for not turning them into a throuple. I'm surprised he could trust another bi woman after the betrayal, but it was a good story.

A nice change on an often told tale. You have great knack for spinning an imagery into life of our minds. It was a pretty good tale.

It earned the Outstanding Read ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating I gave it.

Keep Writing

JH4Fun

Since I knew that this is fiction I was able to suspend my disbelief; so I enjoyed it. While it could never happen I like it that it did in the fictionalized world of Loving Wives, so 5* from me, especially since I prize originality.

A bit weird, but enjoyable. Even funny at times, which was a relief.

Maybe you should read something by Vandemonium1 or CIndyTV. Good story

Great story! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Loved the angle of this story. Just wish it hadn't been quite so obvious that Hunter and Wendy were both dating Coline.

Nicely done. Good story, well written, creative and written at a good pace without loading it up with innocuous dialogue; thank you.

Full marks!

I gave it a four instead of a five for one single reason: Did Wendy lie about her last name or did Coline and Hunter work without ever addressing each other with anything other than their first names? Because, the whole reveal, where Coline never knew her coworker was Wendy's husband, was a little weird to me.

Fun with a good twist but being with another Bi woman might put him in the same situation again in the future when she starts missing a woman's touch. Hopefully she isn't a cheater like Wendy but who knows. I wouldn't get with a Bi woman for this very reason.

I think (and thought that way the further I read on into the story) that a thruple would have probably been the worst choice you could have made.

A nice twist, I think I figured out when Colin was telling him about her was getting a divorce. Maybe Colin never having a man before didn't give it a real chance. Especially when we are young it seems all we think about is sex and then when it occurs a lot of young people are disappointed. There was this old guy at work (maybe 55) whenever the topic of sex came up he would say" it's and over rated pass time" and I really have to agree with him. I'm on board here about cheaters and liars, they can't be trusted and when AIDS showed the cheaters were endangering not just themselves but two families as well. If you want to play around or have some 'strange' don't get married. Seems simple to me. Good story 4 stars.

I enjoyed this. 5 stars.

Although sexuality doesn't change, it can grow. I know a lady who was exclusively with females. She broke up with a partner who changed sex because she couldn't be with a man. Eventually during a threesome with a couple, she changed her mind. She is now married to that man with three children and is totally monogamous.

I don't think her sexuality changed but it grew when she fell for the person rather than their gender.

Well done. Enjoyable.

This storyline made me laugh so hard 😂

A little predictable that Coline was Wendy's girlfriend.

But a nice romantic story anyway

Great story. As soon as coline said she was lesbian I guessed she was Wendy's girlfriend, however for me that didn't take away from the story. Mostly because I wanted to see the ah ha moment when they figured it out. I wasn't disappointed. I didn't get the fealing that they would become a threesome at all, hunter seemed way to bothered by wendys lies. Without the prolonged lies coline's and hunters relationship couldn't evolve. Can't wait for more stories from you.

I HAD to give a little nod to a very fine storyteller, cagivagurl.

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Really? I dont recall your MC being a spineless peice of shit cuck

“I can't control how I feel!”

/

So she’s an animal, instead of a human being. People absolutely CAN control their emotions. More importantly, in this situation, she could control her actions. Love is a choice, otherwise it’s meaningless!

/

This entire story is a post modern fantasy, filled with gender ideology lies and unaccountable childishness!

/

ZK

Pretty obvious from the off, but entertaining. Not so much tongue in cheek as tongue in pussy.

Well that ending was telegraphed from the start, as for not making them a throuple you may as well have it would have only been one more cliche to add to the continuous stream of cliches already there. Taken as a whole this was just another also ran.

When Hunter says he will be out Saturday riding, Wendy says she will go see her lover. So how can they both be with her Saturday? You can’t create things that can’t be true to try and throw the reader off from the fact that they were obviously seeing the same person.

@chuckles: Probably because that's exactly where they came from. I asked qhml1 for permission to borrow his characters for that small scene, but I never heard back. So I changed the names but left the scene as a small homage to one of my favorite writers.

What an excellent story. Even though the premise was easy to figure out, it was the seeing how it played out that was the most fun. The irony at the end was delicious with Wendy lying and cheating on both she thought she would always have someone as a backup in case things went wrong. Well things couldn’t have gone more wrong and so much for her backup. I usually look forward to a BtB story or even a nice harsh scorched earth but this was just a solid really enjoyable fun read that I will be coming back to read this many times in the future which shows how good I think your work is.

Pretty good. Wendy was a fool. And something about the MC just didn’t sit well with me.

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One big plot quibble: his situation was VERY unusual. How could Col NOT suspect right away that his wife was HER girlfriend? That just didn’t compute.

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4 ****

I really liked it, thank you. Wouldn't Wendy know where Col was working such that she would know they knew each other?

Motto Guzzi and Vespa are in the same stable as Aprilla, along with two even lesser known names of Derbi and Gilera.

Throuple was the obvious conclusion once I picked up that the name Wendy never came up in conversation, but I enjoyed the twist the "feelings" took this story. 5 from me.

fucking stupid.............. not even realistic..... bunch of crap.............

This was a fun story. I suspect some people will be annoyed by Coline's turn but I think Hunter said it best when he said that essentially love is love. I don't think he "cured" her with his cock or anything. I suspect she may have had some bi tendencies all along or she wouldn't have even allowed him to go down on her. It's also possible that their feelings are so strong that neither of them would care what equipment was between their legs.

I agree with others that Coline being Wendy's lover was obvious. In fact, the only time I got annoyed was when Coline said her girlfriend was getting a divorce from her asshole ex. If I was Hunter I'd have immediately said "Her name isn't Wendy is it?" I mean, sure, it's a long shot but there is no chance I wouldn't have immediately asked.

Also, I quite liked how they ambushed her at that final dinner. Wendy was a liar and couldn't be trusted, even if they didn't end up together they were both better off with her out of their lives.

Cool tail lol

That was great but what happens when Coline gets tired of his scratchy beard and wants to go back to the soft feminine feel of a woman? And how can he actually fall in love with someone just like his ex-wife? Too may holes in this one a long lasting relationship.

I enjoyed the story even though I figured it out pretty quickly. I'm a sucker for happy endings.

Clever idea, but the treatment of "love" was the typical shallow nonsense about "feelings ", and the feminist, utterly false trope about women having to work "twice as hard" is a lie that's been around since the 70s to conceal the economic rents women enjoy from institutionalized discrimination, once known as "affirmative action" and now called "DEI".

Wendy's transgressions were the catalyst for all the angst going on in this story. Previous comments have been made about Hunter and Coline being liars and cheaters but none of that can really be laid at Colines feet as she believed she was in a non exclusive relationship with someone in the midst of divorce. There was no divorce in place so yes, Hunter was cheating. Wendy's transgressions just seemed boundless. She got what she deserved and it certainly remains to be seen whether or not Coline has been truly cured or just like Wendy she will meet another woman and it will just click.

Many straight dudes fantasize about switching a gay woman, so a fun fantasy. I think having the author of some of the least believable stories on here tell you "it could never happen" is pretty high praise.

Pretty sure ive read this before? Or one exactly like this with a different ending?

When Hunter discovered her cheating, Wendy phoned her lover and said: "He knows! What are we going to do?" and then she saw him. "I have to go."

This conversation is in contradiction with the fact that she had made Coline believe that she was going to divorce her husband.

⭐⭐⭐⭐

I wasn’t sure about this one, but as I read it became better and better. I figured pretty early, you dropped some clues, that Wendy was playing both of them. I loved the way it ended. Great story and easy *5.

What happened to the stories about guys with fucking spines. The second he learned of her cheating, he would have been our the door. Especially the first time Wendy said she was leaving to still go see her, and he stayed. WTF is mentaly wrong with authors that think a guy with any self respect would stick around after that? No respectable man would. So unbelievable. Nice try but damn.

I thoroughly enjoyed this tale! The dialogue between Hunter & Coline was priceless; i had many a good chuckle with those two. Fun well written story given the subject of cheating. Thank for time & effort Jalibar62. 5* worthy

4 stars and it would have been a 5 star rating IF you let Wendy join them in wedded bliss.

WENDY needs a second chance.

Come on - do the right thing - REWRITE the ending to include WENDY.

That's how you need to talk sense into girls who imagine themselves to be lesbians, trans men with tits and a pussy, and how many genders have these digenerates invented for you? A man has a penis, a woman has a vagina.. Falling in love and copulating - children are obtained.. That's how the world works! America, wake up, fuck!!!

From Russia with love

It was pretty clear from the beginning that she was his wife's lover. The ones that didn't see that coming were the two of them. I'm glad they both dropped the cheater. Did she change sexuality or did she just discover she was bisexual or even pansexual depending upon the person? It doesn't matter. I enjoyed this one. Five stars.

Good story, and a good ending, but he gave her too much rope. And, technically, his 'training' was cheating. But 5 stars, because he got a happy ending. and no bloodshed. I liked it. More, please. The Bear, as always being an old softy, approves.

The BEAR

Really enjoyed this story. It's great to have a fresh "variation on the theme." I liked the motorcycle sub-theme, too. Thanks!

For some reason, I didn’t care for this story. I disliked all three characters for their cheating ways. Hunter seemed especially hypocritical to me. It did get me thinking, though. That’s always a good thing, so thank you for writing and thank you for sharing your work.

Enjoyable, albeit predictable. I'm glad you didn't go the 'throuple' route, as that would have greatly diminished the MC and story. Like others have stated, the MC gave Wendy too much rope to hang herself. I understand why you needed to do that, as it was the only way to extend the amount of time the MC could spend with Coline to develop a relationship.

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Somewhat of a plot hole for me: After the MC found the thong, Wendy called Coline to tell her that her husband 'found out' about them. Then Coline's coworker (who she decided to just now befriend) told her that his wife was cheating with another woman and he just found out. That should have tripped some kind of mental switch in her, even if it was simply "Well, THAT'S a huge coincidence. What a strange world!" And in none of their friendly conversations, he never said his wife's name? That just isn't natural.

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Thanks for sharing the story. A solid 4.4*

I don't know what to think...

A 3-star or 4-star?

But Hunter is kinda wimpy guy...

Gotta go with 4-star.

The story was quite good and really the plot twist was very original though it was telegraphed that Wendy's lover was Coline but still quite a twist. Thanks @Jalibar62.

Good story, But I had the plot figured out by halfway down page two. Still didn't detract from my enjoying your tale. Nice one..... 5 stars.

Doesn't matter what sex you are, You love who you love. Don't get fucked over by trying to be in a group when you are an individual. Wendy was a dead woman walking anyway, She got dumped because she was a lying cheater. whether you like women or men. No one like a person who lies and cheats and thinks they didn't have to answer for it.

It was different, fun even if you saw down the line that Coline was with both of them. Nice ending. 5*****

Entertaining

That was really a cute story, but I know for a fact, if you are gay you do not cross the line, into Bi. That said maybe your Col was Bi just did not know, but in real life no sorry they never cross the line.

By The Way I did score you 5 stars for the sentiment and enjoyable writing; thank you for your submission.

If he found her thong at his place, then Coline must've seen Wendy was still married their first time together.

Good story. They both said it to Wendy "You can't be trusted". Does not need to be BTB to be good. Just getting on with their lives is the satisfaction.

Splendid story, well written, characters are believable. 5*****

Aw I was hoping for the trio. Wendy was kind of a mess. Make her pay for the lying and cheating but take her in. Two bisexual friends invited me to join them and it was great. As a young man being a sex toy for two voracious women.

Really enjoyed the flow of the story. Certainly a different view of the cheating wife tale. Thanks for sharing.

who would wish for a throuple? Someone that wants all the annoyances of a relationship, with NONE of the benefits.

Hunter collapsed toe the floor?

I have not really seen anyone in that kind of stress, but, seems a bit odd.

Really fun, sexy story, with an earned romance from time spent together, carefully, sensually, lovingly...?

Amazingly well-written story. And I am SO happy we didn't get yet another contrived polyamori trope.

🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

Solid story. 4*

Good story, despite the trite plot "twist". I feel for Wendy a little. It's like when two of your friends meet, become friends themselves and leave you behind.

4 stars from Xluckylee for a pretty good story

Obvious in the end but a good but if fun

I kept waiting for Wendy to be the common factor, and I was right.

I kept waiting for the big threesome finish, and I was WRONG! THAT caught me off guard, but it makes perfect sense. Mark and Coline were honest with each other, every step of the way, and every step of the way Wendy lied. They were too good for her!

This was great, though, snappy and fluid with a good sense of humor and character. Easy 5 stars!

This was a surprisingly good story. 5 stars.

Man, don’t binge my stuff. That’ll send you to therapy. Great story, though!

@NTH: Too late!

1. First regarding the last paragraph - who said she "changed her sexuality"? Sexual attraction in complex, there's all sorts of shades - she could have been pansexual, slightly bisexual, or demisexual, or about a thousand other things where she wasn't into most men but into this ONE specific one. Just because she THOUGHT she was 100% lesbian, doesn't mean she actually was, so what changed was what she knew about her sexuality - not her sexuality itself.

2. 4 stars for the story itself. I took off 1 star for him only being "maybe we will not stay married if you dump your gf" and "I still luuuuuuuve her" instead of "you cheated, bye bye I don't love you you anymore backstabbing lying skank". However I gave an extra star because the author was an evil bastard and REALLY made me believe that they would end up as a trouple (which I would have hated), but then finally resolved things the correct, good, righteous way. So 5 stars total. You mentioned NoTalentHack - I'm not expert enough to compare this story to his writing - but it was VERY well written and enjoyable (other than 2 points mentioned at the start of this paragraph, which plague 80+% of LW stories).

@anon - trouples CAN work. But they are a delicate thing to get right, and require right people AND right attitude AND effort. But when they work they WORK - better than mono couples on average (there are many benefits to a trouple, both emotional, physical, AND not least, purely real-life, such as improved finances/more leisure time/etc....)

Great twist in a great story. Poor Wendy lost them both just because she was a lying cheating bitch. Thanks for not taking it poly.

People don't change their sexuality, true, but if they don't meet people that turn them on, they could have undiscovered aspects of their sexuality.

Sad that Wendy couldn't come clean, but the story was excellent.

Actually I don't think a throuple would have been anymore unbelievable. I mean in the whole history of the world the numbers of lesbians that have been turned straight through personal choice has to be close to zero. While the numbers of cheaters that have stayed with their partners is surprisingly high as is the numbers of people that have had harems and poly relationships.

No what's surprising is that anyone imagines that this relationship will last, that she won't cheat on him with&, or just leave him for another woman down the road. Or worst of all, they'll have kids she'll get to 55 have an affair and leave him telling him he knew all along she was a lesbian and he should just suck it up.

Honestly, the throuple would have been a more realistic ending because it would have left everyone satisfied on the sexual level.

Trust is over rated, he trusted his wife not to cheat and look how that worked out.

The best you can hope for is that your partner is sane and rational and that you can provide everything that they need to not cheat. Because you better believe that every person if given the opportunity to, and the credible belief that they could have a serious relationship with a 'better' person they would take it. The only obstacle would be overcoming the sense of guilt that some would have.

Good stuff, I liked it. I think a lot of people confuse sexuality with attraction. Some prefer the same sex more, but it doesn’t mean they can’t develop feelings deep enough to maintain a lifelong relationship with the opposite gender. Everyone is different, has different experiences, and may prioritize gender more highly than others. The really surprising part in the story, is that Hunter never mentioned Wendy’s name throughout his lengthy talks with Coline. Likewise, Coline never mentioned her gf’s name. I’d expect one of them to have let Wendy’s name slip out much earlier, especially on drunk night.