Head Doctor

Rachel continued. "Now the music swells and Sophia nuzzles into your neck, just like you knew would happen, but this time you remember she's emotional and can't help herself."

I felt my arm tense up below the doctor's touch and she started to rub along it. I tried to relax and remember that it was just an exercise.

"It's okay Scott, just let her get close. It's important to let go emotionally here. You're safe, and everything we talk about is just between us. She's not here, and I'm not judging you. Just let it happen."

Her voice lowered into a softer, more intimate tone, "Now feel her turn her head into your neck, softly resting her lips against your skin. Is that what she does?"

I slowly nodded my head, my inner guard letting down and nervously allowing this to continue.

"Now let's pretend you simply let your mother, Sophia, kiss your neck like that. It's fine this time, nothing harmful, just a pair of lips. Her hands caress as well, and you let them. See yourself standing there, allowing your mother to kiss and touch you, knowing she doesn't really mean anything by it; she's intoxicated, and vulnerable."

I listened to Rachel in silence as her words sank in. I didn't know how to respond as she gently short circuited my automatic defenses with soft her suggestions.

"So let's keep imagining that your mother is kissing you on the neck and it feels nice. I mean, it's just kissing right? It's supposed to feel nice. She's not hurting you, so just allow it to feel good for once. You dance with her and feel her soft lips against your neck, sending shivers down your legs. That's what it does to you, right? It's okay Scott. . . that's what it does to everyone."

I felt Rachel next to me, escorting me on this unexpected journey into awkward discomfort. She was somehow diffusing my initial anger and embarrassment, and I felt my usually sharp emotions begin to dull as she continued.

"Feel her hands wander your body, finding their way under your shirt the way they do. Her fingers touch your bare skin, and it's okay this time, just let them in. She wants to feel a strong man in her arms, and she may never even remember it was you. Just let it happen, be there for her. It's just dancing."

I felt Rachel slide one of her hands up my arm a bit and back down, her voice getting a little lower. "But then, as you might have expected, you feel her hands shift from rubbing your bare back to further down, just beyond the loose waistband of your pants . . . underneath."

My pulse instantly pounded.

"I know your heart jumps when she does it . . . but stand your ground this time. Remember her condition. Know that your love for her is stronger than this."

I swallowed hard. Rachel's soft words were heavy in my mind, and I started feeling dizzy and confused. I was picturing my own mother with her lips and hands on me again, trying to keep from panicking even though it wasn't real. The doctor continued . . .

"She doesn't mean any harm Scott, quite the opposite. Bare hands on soft skin tend to wander, don't they? It's natural." She casually smoothed her fingers along my arm to make her point, "They touch and move, and it's innocent. Even if her hands were to push their way right into your pants to feel her son's bare cheeks, you'll let it go this time, right? It's fine. Your mother is drunk and touching your body, her hands are even inside your pants, grabbing and rubbing your backside while she drags her heavy lips along your neck. So what? This time you let her have her way, and that's all she really wants; the feel of a man in her arms, and his strong acceptance of her affections.

"Would that be so difficult to allow Scott?"

I sat in silence amidst a whirl of emotions, my body knowing firsthand the sensations she was describing and trying my hardest to accept them, to allow them. The silence she left hanging between us was . . . comfortable for one fleeting, fragile moment . . . and then she had to go and break it.

"Or is that not the real problem?"

She paused for a second as if in thought, and then pushed herself up to my ear and whispered, "Do you know what I think Scott? I think you might be afraid; afraid you might actually get aroused by your own mother when she does these things to you, isn't that right?"

My eyes shot open. I gulped hard at this realization, and she was right, I was definitely afraid of that! Time slowed as the harsh awareness hit me; this whole time I had been deathly afraid of getting turned on by my own mom!!

Rachel leaned back away from me to allow some space for this realization to sink in. That's exactly what was wrong with me, why I had been getting so upset at everything lately! Rachel seemed to notice that my mind was working hard, and she started unraveling me further.

"Is she pretty Scott? Does she have a nice body? I'm guessing she's probably very cute, and you're afraid that her wandering hands and her soft lips might actually feel a little too nice against you, am I right?"

I couldn't respond, I was too busy mentally bashing myself for being so sick in the head! Rachel continued.

"Do you ever think about how nice her body feels against you like that when you dance? How gentle her touch feels on your skin and how your young body might eventually react to her drunken advances? I mean, those wandering hands of hers might accidentally happen upon her grown son in more ways than one, am I right?"

My eyes rolled back in my head and I tried again to swallow. Nothing.

"She might actually get a feel for what her kisses and touches are doing to her young son's body. Let's face it, if you let her go on like this, you would be getting erect for your own mother; isn't that the real problem Scott? Have you ever found yourself getting physically aroused by her?"

I dared not speak.

"I think you have . . . and often. In fact, you're erect right now just hearing me talk about it. I can see it Scott. We're just talking here, and you're getting aroused just thinking about finally letting your mother have her way with you, aren't you?"

I knew instantly she was right, and I was mortified as Rachel rubbed along my arm, quite close to my traitor of an erection. She leaned into me until I felt a pair of heavy breasts press into my arm, her voice hot in my ear.

"It's okay Scott, I understand . . . I really do. It's completely natural for you to feel this way, and you're absolutely safe here with me. We're just exploring your feelings and not doing any harm, these are just thoughts. Now keep those eyes closed and stay with me, and let me know if you feel like we're going too far."

The session had gone from strange to inexplicable in about 10 minutes' time. Suddenly I was aware that this woman was drilling into my soul to find the places where my real darkness resided. I felt her lean in and ease more words into my ear.

"Now we're going to move in another direction Scott, and it might become a little more . . . stimulating for you. Just let it happen, it's all part of the process. All you need to do is listen . . .

"Now I want you to actually think about actually returning your mother's gentle caresses for once. Don't worry Scott. It's okay this time . . . it's just you and me in here and you're safe. Just let your feelings appear and accept them as they are. Even if you get aroused this time I want you to keep dancing with her. It's fine; here are no rules or judgments here; we're exploring your mind."

I didn't like where this was going.

Or did I?

"Now feel her tight embrace, her lips against your neck and her hands moving around under your clothes. I want you to go ahead and run your fingers under the edge of her shirt a little. Do you think she would actually allow her son's firm hands to touch against her soft skin? Of course she would Scott, and I know you'd like to feel her body in return. So just for today, in the safety of this office . . . go ahead. Slip under the edge and gently feel her soft waist.

"That's it. Her bare skin is so smooth under your fingers. Now you know why she keeps touching your body . . . it's nice under there. Soft. Personal. She reacts to your intimate touch by opening her lips against your neck and tasting your skin. Did you expect that? She likes it Scott, she likes your hands on her body. Feel your mother's bare flesh, isn't it warm? Rub her smooth back and dance with her, feel how tender she is."

My head was swimming as I envisioned the scene unfolding. I was well aware of how much Mother needed me to respond to her, and I never did. Going through this bizarre exercise and exploring these feelings was both stimulating and frightening at the same time. The guilty feeling of touching my mother, even in my imagination, was almost unbearable.

"Dance with her Scott, touch her. She's responding just as you feared she would, with approval."

I swallowed hard and felt my cock tighten.

"Your fingers climb higher and brush against something wrapped around her chest. It's her bra Scott, your mother's tightly kept secret. Go ahead, touch it. Touch your mother's bra, it's okay. Run your fingers along the edge of her tight underwear. She'll shiver and her hands will reach further into your pants. She knows what you've found."

I swallowed hard as my mind felt one of the lacy tops I had always glimpsed over the years while Mom was changing or getting dressed. I rarely saw her without one, but the sight of her dressed in one was on permanent file in my memory.

"As your fingers trace the taught line between your mother's bare skin and her bra," Dr. Rachel continued in a soft voice, "your hand bumps into something soft and bulbous; It's one of her breasts Scott. Can you feel it? It's larger than you expected. Now I want you to turn your hand and boldly place it right over the top. Go ahead, touch that place on your mother you've thought about so many times."

Visions of Mom's elusive hills came to my head as I finally allowed myself to imagine my own hand touching down and taking one into my uncertain grip.

"She leans into your hand Scott, accepting your touch on her body. Go ahead, clutch your mother's breast. Do it. Squeeze it. She'll let you grab her chest like that you know, she's drunk."

I heard a heavy breath escape from inside me as my mind was lost in a mental room of depravity where I was feeling up my own mother, and Dr. Blancet continued her verbal encouragement.

"Feel her tender flesh giving way beneath your tightening fingers. That's it . . . your mother's milky breast is in the palm of your hand. You're grabbing her chest and she knows it. She feels her son's strong hand holding her tight and groans her approval into your neck."

Rachel paused and my mental hands finally gave my mother's soft breast the attention I had always dreamed they would. I was lost in time as my visions turned carnal and my pants twitched forcefully in my lap.

"This innocent dance has taken a turn now, hasn't it Scott? The two of you are still rocking to the music, but your wandering hands have lit small fires inside of you both."

In that moment, I had a vague feeling inside that this exercise of hers was spiraling out of control. It was a distant thought however, and my overwhelming urge to play it out was too strong; any underlying reservations I may have had went unheeded.

"Suddenly your cravings intensify, don't they? They burn. It's okay Scott . . . she knows all about it, even anticipates your hand reaching back and gently unclasping that tight barrier between you and her feminine mounds. Do it Scott, bare her breasts. Feel the edges of her bra release as you loosen the tight hold it has on her chest. Now slide your fingertips under the edge and seek out the warm and forbidden hills of Sophia's naked breasts; they've been yearning for a tender touch.

"She feels her son's hand climb up under her bra and she pushes into you again, letting you know she wants you there. Her bra slides up, and they're finally free beneath your mother's shirt. Her soft globes of forbidden flesh are warm and smooth in your hands; can you feel them? Her bare nipples are tight Scott. She's excited about this. She moans into your neck as you feel her wet tongue lick across your skin. Your mother/son dance just turned very carnal Scott, and her grip on your ass just tightened.

"But wait . . . did she just push herself into that hard lump in the front of your pants? Oh god . . . she did! She knows about it Scott. Your mother can feel how stiff your young, excited cock is for her. She feels a rush of desire as she realizes the young man in her arms is truly enjoying this dance the way she is. Let her feel your excitement press into her, actually show her your secret passion this time."

I felt my lap surge at the thought of my mother feeling my stiffness against her. I was amazed at how vivid this was becoming, and how lightheaded I was getting. My rigid shaft was violently pushing a khaki tent upwards while my mental hands were holding my mother's bare breasts.

"Feel her press into your hips as you fondle your mother's chest. Mmmm, she asked for it, didn't she? That's what she gets for kissing your neck, isn't it? She's so drunk right now she may never even remember you were holding her breasts while you danced. It's like a free pass to feel her up as she grabs your ass inside your pants and pushes herself against your hard cock."

I closed my eyes and dropped my head back, listening to this knowing woman unfurl my inner fantasy and lay it right in front me, right in my lustful lap while she watched. Her lips were up against my ear now, her breath floating along my neck as she spoke into my being. I felt her fingers touch against my erection as I already knew they would. I instantly wanted her to know how much this was turning me on.

"Dance with her Scott. Dance and push back against her hips and let her grabbing hands control you. Let her pull your body closer while you pinch and roll her thick nipples around in your fingers. Your dance has turned very erotic, hasn't it? Her heavy breathing in your ear is sending waves of desire into your throbbing cock."

With that Rachel breathed into my ear, and the throbbing reaction in my cock was correct. I felt her hand wrap around my bulging pants as she continued.

"My god Scott, she's so drunk right now you could probably slip your hand down the back of her pants, just like she's doing to you. Go ahead, slide a hand lower. She's soft and smooth, her tender skin keeps going past her waistline, and she trembles as you climb inside. Her skin never gets touched under there, it's private, intimate. Feel her womanly body Scott, her hips, her secret naked skin, the unseen flesh she's been saving, for you perhaps. Her son."

Those words surged my erection deeper into my doctor's grip. She grabbed it tight and squeezed as she continued filling my mind with erotic torture.

"Oh Scott, there is no doubt that you're hard for your own mother as she licks your neck and moves her bare cheeks around in your hands. My god, what would people say if they knew you and your mother were grabbing each other's naked asses and grinding it out in the living room? It would be incest Scott, incest."

Her words rung loudly in my ears as my erection surged again within her firm grasp and my hips involuntarily pushed upwards. Her lips gently dragged along my ear, tensing my body.

"It's okay Scott, this is not incest. This is us talking about incest. It's fine here . . . another world, a world where it's perfectly normal for a son to unsnap his mother's pants so his anxious fingers can crawl inside.

"Mmmm, what's in there Scott? Have you thought about that; what your mother might be guarding between her legs? I want you to slide your hand down the front of her open pants, past the soft elastic of your mother's panties, and right between her legs. Her coarse hair tangles in your fingers, and you find a wet heat pulsing below. Let your mother feel her son's thick fingers pressing against the bare drunken lips quivering between her legs.

"You bastard," she whispered loudly and suggestively in my ear, squeezing my blistering cock through my pants, "You're fingering your own mother in her weakened state. She's drunk and you've got your hand in her pants, feeling her most private place, her pussy . . . your mother's wet, drunken pussy Scott. She's soaked and your fingers are down there, touching her. My god her wide-open lips and sopping wetness can only mean one thing Scott; she's aroused for YOU!"

My eyes were glued shut for fear of opening them and dissolving the scene. Instead I imagined a world where Mom and I were passionate lovers, scrambling to get ourselves closer and closer. I could feel my cock skin sliding up and down as Rachel rubbed the length of it through my pants.

"My god Scott, your cock is furious right now just hearing me talk about how you want to finger your own mother. Would you like to feel her fingers too? What if Sophia grabbed onto your frantic penis and squeezed it tight? Mmmmm, you'd like that wouldn't you Scott? You'd let your own mother touch your hot cock in her living room, and why not? She's already grinding her naked pussy on your hand, spreading her juices all over your thick fingers."

I felt my button and fly gently give way as my cock stretched out in my lap, lurching with desire.

"You really want to pull your aroused penis out for your mother to see, don't you Scott? You want to grab her delicate hand and wrap her small fingers around your excited manhood and guide her to stroke your hard cock to the beat of the soft music."

My pulse jumped as I felt Rachel's hand reach into my boxers and encase the skin of my swollen shaft in her experienced fingers. My breath shortened as her sultry words drifted through my ear.

"You'll let her hold your bare cock in her hand, won't you Scott? Feel her fingers around it, holding her own son's tight erection in her hand."

My cock was out in her cozy office now, and I was apparently letting my therapist touch me while her words drifted into and out of my consciousness, arousing more lust in my body than I remember ever having in my life.

"Scott, you are getting so hot picturing your mother's hand holding your cock, aren't you? Did you ever picture Sophia's little hand like that, touching your body in such an intimate way? Trace your fingers along the bumps of her lips while she grips your cock. She's slowly stroking you . . . her son. Thrust your need into her bare hand . . . mmmm, like that. Let her feel you swell."

This was getting to be too much and I groaned up to the ceiling as I pushed my cock into the warm grip of the wayward fingers grasping me. I wanted to fuck that warm hand, essentially my mother's virtual hold on my cock.

"You're getting so worked up Scott. What's next? Do you think you would actually try to push her pants down? Of course you would. She'll let you do it too, she's so vulnerable. Push them down so her naked lower body is finally out for her young son to see. Her bare cheeks are exposed. Her furry bush is showing. My god she's so wet! Did you think about that when she wanted to dance? How soaking wet your mother Sophia might actually get for her own son?

"Touch your mother again. Touch her sex Scott. Feel your mother's damp lips as they wrap around your digging fingers. Did she just spread her legs a little? Mmmmm, she moans into your neck and loses her balance as you slide your finger right up her hungry cunt, her hand never loosening its tight grip on your blistering hard cock."