All Comments on 'Heel and Toe'

The author put a lot into this, but they built a wife who did an awful lot to destroy the marriage. It is difficult to imagine the husband rebuilding a relationship with either woman.

Really good writing here I thoroughly enjoyed story it was a real ride.The one thing I can’t get my head round is that Reggie confronted them while they were preparing to go out for their dates again.So Devon wasn’t really feeling guilty and putting a stop to anything was she?She almost had sex with her date twice ,surely it was going to happen if Reggie never confronted them.I think I may have to read this again I always rush a good story on first read so may have missed something .Perhaps that was the point that Reggie stopped them before that point of no return was reached even if I think that’s already been reached .Well done Choppedliver 4⭐️

Writing a story is never easy and 12 chapters is a lot to write.

I stopped reading halfway through the first page.

Devon, in the story, was not “raised to be his perfect wife”. People aren’t perfect. We are flawed and broken and imperfect. We get old and become aged, wrinkled and achy. In short, any story that says how perfect so-and-so is automatically loses my attention and gets downvoted.

You doubled down by having her mother call Devon “daughter”. No one says “daughter, let’s go.” They’ll say the name or some such moniker and not “son” or “daughter”

If you are going to write a book, write a book. Do you really need 12 pages to say what you have to say?

U seem to have it bad for ur own writings…u just love the sound of ur own words…and u just don’t want to stop meandering and meandering…. Result..stories that go round and round and become so boring that it takes the chuff out of a reader just to finish!

I tried to stick with you but finally tuned out around page 4. No one talks constantly in analogies and metaphors over and over again saying the same thing. A confrontation that should have lasted no more than a page turned into four. You seriously need an editor who can be blunt and honest about your diharea of the keyboard.

Why, in certain stories, such as this one, do the exposed betrayers gasp and turn various colors? They know what they were doing. Their shock at getting found out doesn’t warrant their stunned and terrified responses. Once their goose is cooked, it just gets drier and less tasty under unending, repetitive, flames. Here, the litany of the discovery of the cheating was interminable. And daughter was a loss leader to help mom get laid? In what universe is there a lack of dicks for a woman looking for action? This one, apparently.

My problem with the story is that if Devon proved what she needed to on her last encounter, as she claimed, why were she and he mom dressed and ready to go back the next night when Reggie confronted them, and why didn't Reggie confront her about that.

Overall good story, but quite loquacious, probably 4 pages to long

Thanks for writing

Couldn't read past the first page. Waaaaay to wordy and soliloquised. The only context where people talk like that is in formal lectures.

Devon obviously had complete sexual relations twice with her BF. She is just covering it up. I'm surprised hubby didn't tell them to go do it again so he could watch to see what really happens. LOL 5 stars for CL

Great Writing, Great Story, HallMark Channel next stop! Thanks, Buster2U

I could not get past the 3d page. Too many words and not enough drama or development. I could not take the risk of continuing to read another 9 pages. There could have been a good story with fewer pages and fewer words.

You take a humane approach. I wonder though if-as many have already expressed-you think about pacing in what is a racing event. The exquisite layering and unpeeling of the onion of the affair; the mother’s duplicity. Could you do this denouement in half the time and half the pages? It would have allowed for a more propulsive merging into the rest of the story?

It's simply too long. If it had been posted over 3 or 4 days it would have made it an easier read. I gave up around page 5. My main problem was everyone spoke in paragraphs instead of speaking a sentence or two at a time. The lengthy dialogues took away any emotional content and created tedium rather than drama.

So a middle aged widow needs her daughter as a wingwoman to snare her date? It seems incredibly unlikely that a woman who opens her dress on the dance floor to show her breasts, gives her date her panties, then takes him out to the parking lot and pulls him into the back seat of the car comes out of that car without having been screwed. No father of a teenager or husband of a wife would believe that line.

I finished the first page and couldn’t handle any more.

God hope i never get into a conversation with you!

12 pages in one single part is not a good idea: it would have been better to make 3 parts of 4 pages each, released every 2-3 days, so to give the readers a full meal, but 1 plate at a time. The writing style is very good, but authors have to remember that "content is king".

Too long, too many analogies, too over the top. Needs editing, the inserts in blood vessels are stents not stints. Some missing words.

One of the best reconciliation stories I've read. Most make it way too easy.

WAY too long for what it was and the husband would have to be a complete moron of epic proportions to consider doing anything but get away from those bitches. Even for fiction it was a horrible ending to a bad story.

Devon was dishonest the entire rebuild time. I can't see how any kind of lasting, trusting relationship can be restructured with that kind of lying ongoing. She was a liar and a slut and her Mom was only guilty up to a certain point for her behavior. She willingly did things that there should have been no return from. Hubby was a doormat and that's that. And it was little long.

I read how she ended up going out on dates because of her mother. There was a lot of drama around date number 2 being her way of getting the better of the guy because of her lapse on the first date. But after all of that guilt and trying to end it with the guy I missed why she was going out for Date number three when her husband confronted her?

He spent way too much time on her IMO. Just dump her.

A very enjoyable story very well told. Kudos to all involved.

Most people would not have forgiven their spouse in those circumstances. You went a little to far in her betrayal.. I am not into the cuck life style, so that’s one persons opinion. It was still a good story

The storyline is good..but a bit verbose..too many repetitive dialogue..and too long for comfort may be whittled down quite a lot .

I was going to bypass this story altogether, but once I started I got to the bottom of page 1 and thought Ill come back later, an hour later I have finished it, Im suppose to be fixing wheel bearings to go fishing, Your story delayed all that and thats the best compliment I can give, Great story , great imagination and 5 stars for you sir, Thank you for sharing this gem

Heavy going, right from the off! I have to confess skipping huge chunks just to try to make it through to the end.

Agree with several others, incorrect word choice, rambling verbose sentence structure. Started reading, got three paragraphs in and quit. You are forbidden from using words with more than two syllables for your next story. Bet you can’t do it. I can’t tell if your stories are worth reading or not. Not an exercise to see how clever you are. Good writing shows how smart you are. This makes you look like you’re using a dictionary and seriously don’t know what you’re doing.

The first third of the story grabbed me quite strongly. But then it got….we’ll…tedious.

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I think for me the plot problem was that readers never did get a real clue as to what Devon.was actually up to. The whole “wingwoman for Mom” in her search for a guy never…and I mean NEVER … made sense. Especially when readers got to know Marta better as the story proceeded. Frankly, I came away thinking it was just the opposite — Mom was covering for Devon, and when caught, Mom fell on her sword for her daughter. I think Reggie actually figured it out, and basically spent the last half of the story doing all he could to get Devon to fess up….which she did almost. In my opinion Devon DID fuck the guy, but knew that admitting to it would seal her doom. So she admitted to essentially everything except penetration. What I could not suss out is whether Reggie believed her or not.

.

Still, it was obvious Reg wanted to save the marriage, so when Devon acted like she did too, he forced her to do just about everything possible to cross that remorse bridge. While I think she did, she still withheld the admission of actually fucking the guy…because she thought…and likely correctly….that Reg dumps her if she admits it.

.

4 ****

Quite bizarre the wife being adamant she didn’t really cheat despite going out trolling for men, dancing intimately with them (her mother pointed out herself it’s why men don’t like their women going out with out them), kissing, flirting, fondling and stripping off in the back of a car with a man. Messaging him also, it’s clearly all cheating whether there’s intercourse or not. You’re going behind your partners back with someone of the opposite sex and excluding your partner. It’s a dam affair and you have to be delusional to think other wise..

Still it’s your story, to me he was to forgiving to quickly.

Bit, just one thing not mentioned. When he returned home and confronted them, it was after the evening the wife arranged to ‘test’ herself?? Must have been has his PI got the photos of that night.

So why did she lie to him that she was staying home (confrontation night) but her and her mother were both dressed up ( the wife braless and dressed revealingly) and about to go out again? If, the night before was a test so she good repair her relationship with the husband why did she say she was staying in when the were off out again?

Another lie after the ‘test’ evening? This was not addressed at all but deserved and answer

I don’t get that part, Also the end the wife said her mother was against her going out on the test night and was upset with her after the first night she ‘almost’ eye roll ‘cheated’ bit during the confrontation the mother said she was happy at her daughter getting some with the boyfriend as her reward for risking her marriage. Very contrasting views.

boring

Great story, I liked the car racing angle. I will agree that a good editor would have helped the story. The story would have been unhurt with 25 to 40 percent less talk about Devon talking about how guilty she felt and how wonderful Reg was. Also, why the wife and MIL were dressed up like sluts when confronted was never dealt with. That substory might have made a better storyline than his doubts about her previous behavoir. Also I agree with others who wonder if the MIL is acting like a cougar and chasing men her daughters age.

I do appreciate you posting the story complete. Wish more authors would do the same.

A great 8 to 9 page story but still a very good 12 page story.

Thank you for the great read.

Not a bad story, but man it was a slog getting through it.

To long

Sorry, bailed after 2 pages. This mountain of useless, repetitive, and stiff dialogue makes a Cagivagurl story seem brief in comparison!

Generally a good story. But was really too long at times. I skimmed through parts of the story. But I read the racing portion. It seems that the author must have had racing experience to write this. And the MC not only knew how to drive the DBR but must have had some experience in a Porsche as he knew how it handled at speed and through curves.

As for the DBR1, I googled it. As the author said, there were only 5 made during the 1950’s. Was interesting reading about it.

Good story but tends to labor the issues. 4

I still need to read as it is so long, wish it would have been done in 2 to fours page series.

Too long and he shouldn’t have fought for their marriage, why stay with anyone who lies as much as she did?

Way way over wrought. And if the night of the photos was to be the last, what were the whores getting dressed up for the night the stupid cuck confronted them? Glad they ended up happily ever after. He'll never know what a complete slut his wife was, or was about to become.

There's a great story on the first page, but then it gets beaten to death after that. I also can't imagine any man taking his wife back after she did what Devon did. She cheated and reacted by punishing her husband. The degree to which she cheated doesn't matter. He would be better off with both whores out of his life.

Too much babble, ends up just being a story about a dumbass cuck and two dirty whores. Skip this long winded trash.

You're still too wordy. This was better than Splashdown, but you could have shaved three pages off of this if characters would stop repeating themselves, and reiterating their comments.

The whole LW part was a little tedious, made up for by the race narrative.

Wordy like your NASA epos, far to long and - as others correctly stated - meandering. I had to skip long passages of the monologues to wade through this story. Not my piece of cake.

Too long and too boring.

Too wordy, progressed at a snails pace. Gave up like a lot of others at page3 .

Sorry, just couldn't even begin to read this after the agony of reading Spashdown. I won't vote wouldn't be fare but not sure there is a future for you in writing.

overdone and repetitive.

I enjoyed the story very much. I don't know if I could make the same decision if my wife was doing what his wife had done. Would she have continued to compete with the guy if she hadn't been caught? Interesting take on her reasoning for her affair. The car race was awesome. Like something old beating something newer.

Some "wise" user often suggests the author to delete the negative feedbacks (and possibly to burn them, if they are coming from the evil anonymous), but thinking better, they are the positive ones, since they are often suggesting the author how to make better tales. In this case, the common advice, already told hundreds of times in previous tales, is "short is better". So, once again, good writing style, good potential, but better to be more concise. One other thing to consider, it's the "difficult" audience in this LW category, so better to know them before posting here, to get a good response.

Blah blah blah blah blah

Too much obtuse conversation that would not happen in the real world

Um, so why were they going out AGAIN at the beginning of the story?

I liked the story on general. You are right that an editor would have helped. The rehashing of the infidelity and remorse really slowed the flow, as did some of the motoring allegory. I know where you were going with it thematically, but it was a bit overdone, I felt. Still, 4⭐

Congratulations for this EXCELLENT story!!!

5 stars from here!

A five star story, however a long winded, rehashing events over and over…. Therefore I give this 4.5*

Thank you for sharing your story. I enjoyed it and look forward to your future tales.

Wow! My God that was a long one but it had me captivated most of the way through. I really wasn't sure what to believe until well into page 4. A few problems though: No woman gets her boobs out in the middle of dance floor just to test herself: If it 's just a test of her resolve why did she give him her underwear prior to going to the car cark and most damningly of all if she had proved to herself that she could resist the night she was photographed having, had to talk her mother into it, Why were they dressed up for a third night out the evening they were confronted? No Devon was a cheating skank far more invested that she would have Reg believe

Overall, too long and too many holes in the plotline. Good idea for a twist though

Circumlocution is "talking in circles." This is the written form of that. Editors and Egos do not mix. Show me a writer who doesn't need an editor, and I'll show you a marginal writer.

Okay, okay, okay...not all anonymous are caustic or obtuse!

I gave you a 4☆ when the story was at 3.5☆. The only things that knocked it down a bit was my inability to give a 4.5☆. Then there were several instances of odd wording and some sentence structures that were not on par with properly composed grammar (I sucked at English and even I recognized the errors). And last was the overburdened rehash of the cheating events that took place. I feel pretty confident that a competent proof reader could have reduced your page count by... at least two pages? I'm making a presumptive guess there but it seems that they went over the second and the third 'date nights' with amazingly detailed and numerous conversations.

That said it was an interesting story and I thoroughly enjoyed that you did not put a lot of things into the story. You did make this a true Loving Wives story with a corresponding plot that did not cater to fetishism and deviant human desire.

I made it almost to the end of the third page. To me it seems that he was beating a dead horse way too long. Saying the same things over and over again. Sorry 1⭐️

80% was sheer boring drivel. The other 20% was worse.

NickTee

Yep. It's been said. I gave it four stars; the racing, which was still overworked a bit, raised it by one. This story would have been better if at least three page had been worked out of it.

Good story. I enjoyed it. Lots of misspellings and incorrect words that detracted from reading the story.

Overly long for the story that was told. Mostly due to lots of repetitive dialogue between Reg and Devon. Also, the car scenes and especially the race seemed overly long. I'm a racing fan and the race scene was well done but, coming at the end of such a long story I just wanted it to be finished by that point.

There seemed to be one big question that was never addressed. Devon says she arranged the night when Reggie's PI caught her cheating so that she could prove to herself she could resist him. If that was the case ... Then why were her and Marta dressed up to go clubbing and meet her boyfriend again when Reggie confronted them???? That seems to me like a huge issue that Reggie would have called her out on and yet with all the dialogue they had about what she did and why she did it ... He never asked her about that.

Overly long and repetitive. The dialogue was unrealistic and fully of prose, people don't talk like that and if you use the other person's name as often as you do (start of almost every paragraph) it jus let comes across as insincere and disingenuous. For the amount of story here it should have been a third of the length

Verbosity is your only talent. This repetitive crap could be wrapped up in 3 much shorter episodes. You just go on and on over the same crap. Please stop writing.

Great story. I get why he didn't want to bang the mother in law. Too much respect for his deceased father in law. But they all encouraged her to sleep with other men, as a widow. Why not be that man? Awesome well. His stoic attitude really shines.

Getting ready to go out again? Good story anyway. 5*

I tried to read this, but it was simply too much of a slog. On the second attempt, I ended up skimming a bit and then just skipping to the end. Better luck with future stories.

just did not see a believable foundation in the story to keep her.

Other then Oh well shes a slut guess I'll keep her and hope she changes her w0ays.

The racing descriptions made up for a lot, but the analogies between racing and sex were just lame. Overall, the story was tedious.

This would have been a much more enjoyable read had you kept it in the separately submitted chapters as originally intended . It was still quite good , mistakes and all, but it was too long and too narrow in it's parameters, kinda like a single railroad track down the commuter lane of an eight lane interstate highway , you want off at the next off ramp but there's no switch tracks off the main line. But all in all I enjoyed it enough to warrant 4 stars

Entire thing could be cut by 2/3rds. You could skim a half page and end up in the same sentence you left on because it kept droning on and on and on and on and on and on.

Repetitive.

I found the story far too repetitive in retelling the events of the 'date' and had to skip parts of it.

Hard to read. Long story ok but this was a short one drawn out.

And nope the marriage would end with the pictures. No coming back from what she did and never would a guy speak to his mother in law again.

Good story idea, but usually less is more.

Less is efinitely better. This story dragged on till I was almost asleep. The writer took a situation where the wife set up an affair and the writer beat it to death. 2/5.

This was an amazingly well-written tale that eadily gets 5 stars from me ! The core story of the potential infidelity made sense in its description, it's impact, and it's resolution...

...I could not have guessed where the story would end when it started, and weaving in the story of a classic car and the race in which it did SO WELL added a neat sub-story to the overall story of a family in crisis, helping to tie together the family relationships - past & present - of two generations... three, if you count the children.

Being a car buff, I had to do some quick research on the DBR1 to refresh my memory as to its bloodlines and history... well done sir ! You picked one of the most beautiful of the early "supercars" from the 1950s, and paid it its due. You must also be a car buff, and have raced at least a bit to be able to describe that part of the story as well as you did ! I had the extreme pleasure of driving CTS-Vs on the Monticello course a couple of times, and it seems you've driven there as well.

All in all, this was a great read, and I'm looking forward to reading more of your work.

Thanks for this.

Maybe I missed it but never saw an explanation as to why she was dressed so sluty when he confronted her if in fact there were only the two encounters . The second only to prove to herself she was not a slut why was she dressed to obviously go out a third time .

An improvement of some of the author's other stories. The racing part was written very well.

However the human part was quite dialog heavy (at least now there are more back and forth in the conversations instead of monologued) and the plot was overly complex and convoluted with again a trickle truth until like page 8. Story still felt a bit bloated in the midsection.

Honestly the author writes good sentences and paragraphs. But it is stitching then together in the human part that is a bit vexing though better than some other earlier stories posted. The construction on the racing and the ending was well executed. The confrontation at the beginning was decent.

That aside the wife was a moron. Pure and simple. She had many options if being a wingman (which is already bad enough) to buy time for hee mother with her beau (btw did Marta ever end up with anyone?). For example, ask to leave the club foe a cup of coffee. Or to walk in a park. Or go to another corner of the club. Getting into the guy's car. Ludicrous.

The wife cheated pure and simple. Yes there was no actual adultery (no sexual intercourse) but being naked that first time, rubbing her genitals on his, teasing him until he would ejaculate, is sex. It is worse than giving a handjob and probably worse than giving a "head them off at the pass" blowjob.

Moreover, she got lucky. The jerk flipped her onto her back off his lap and had issues with the angle with his penis resting along but between her lips. Then getting ready to f$ck her, she cries out "Take me. Take me ... Reggie." Well 999/1000 assholes who screw married women would not hesitate to take the plunge.

Ok she had her epiphany as he hesitated and she start to push him off and smack him a bit to get off. And yes she was drunk. But almost cases there would be penetration, and the majority of guys would not stop unless she started spazzing out and screaming for help. In a parking lot, that would dissuade some predators, not others. She got lucky that he was just a jerk and an asshole not a predator. But seriously that was sex. And she didn't disclose this for 2 years, though her hsuband assumed she had already f$cked the guy and maybe fell in love with him. Despite that he took her back...

Anyways her excuses, especially with the backdrop of emails and texts and their prior making out sessions (with clothes on), ring pretty hollow (father dead, mother miserable, bubble from real life, her competitiveness streak, liquor, he was teasing her, etc). The only saving grace is that is was a coordinated hit on her marriage because her mom told her beau, to tell the asshole, how to seduce her, with drinks, dancing, touches, going slow, etc. That is a nasty betrayal by the her own mother.

Now the logical thing to do after her epiphany would be to go to her husband and confess. Seriously confession makes a big difference in marriages when cheating is involved especially for one night stands. The chance of a marriage surviving five years after discovery prior to confession is only 20%. Less than 15% when the wife is the one caught. But with confession before discovery, the odds go up to 60% to last five years (bit below 50% if wife is the cheater). That is 3x improvement in odds of reconciliation. Given they had no kids, she cheated, and there was weird circumstances with the MIL and soon after her father's death, immediate confession makes a huge difference. Especially with this MC.

But she goes back a second time, one month later, guilty and upset at home, frigid to her husband and cutting him out emotionally and sexually, bad enough (plus whatever had built up.before when she was going out as a wingman) that he hired a PI. Guess she didn't hide her guilt well. Obviously any communications that were recent with the asshole after the near intercourse incident, were reduced and more tepid, probably onkybstarting back up when she had her brilliant plan to "test" herself. I say this because he did not know that she intentionally set up the second make out date. That wasn't on emails or texts. She probably surprised the asshole. The MIL is culpable again because she did not go to the MCz even though she vehemently wanted her daughter to NOT go back. Except she happen3d to unintentionally get her daughter more drunk because the asshole was stepping up to predator by topping her off and wanted to makes sure to get laid that night. Sounded like ahe was more drunk second time than first. In her own words she was one drink away...even though she went in with full intent to stop him cold.

What really is absurd is her rational for going back a second time. It comes off as contrived or her going through temporary insanity. Any number of things could have happened once she got really drunk, ripped open her blouse with no bra, and took off her panties and gave them to the asshole. That is now a declaration of hubting season. Wtf? In her drunk mind she did it to get back into the "clench" in his car to then stiff him. Too bad he slipped his fingers in after he shifted backwards. Then she kissed him (remember she said how he was a great kisser in counseling, that was nice for hubby) while holding onto his waist band to prevent him sliding out (that is actually smart btw at that moment). Then after a short time she called him out, and being not a total slimeball, he let her up and they had some words, appearing like she rejected him, and she stormed off. But again her reasoning for going back a second time (which PI captured) is so dumb or insane that it is surreal. Yeah she is miserable, feels overwhelmed with guilt, doesn't tell her hsuband, blows him off at home emotionally and sexually so he hires a PI, and yeah sets up a second make out session in the guy's backseat to prove herself. Oh and yeah drinking to get liquid courage. Smart, right? Umm no. Anyways she does all this to prove that she is not a slut and she can resist being a cheater. Sorry honey you may not be a slut but you already cheated. And any number of factors were different, you woukd have been boned in the backseat of that car.

I get at the confrontation why she lied by omission of the events that first make out session turned into naked joint masturbation and bear penetration. But sex and cheating is nit jsut about adultery. The former doesn't have to have penetration. What she did with her naked rundown tease and then his penisnlaying between her folds is worse that a handjob / fingering to orgasm, and probably worse than a blowjob (though some will differ on that, to each their own). Somehow while she at first thought what she did was not cheating (it totally was), she knew if she disclosed those details marriage over. I can't blame her looking out for her own self interest while praying for time and opportunity to fix things.

It is pretty simple. She had an affair / cheated. She intentionally wrnt back a month Katerina after freezing out her husband. The first time, yes she was drunk and yes she was seduced using inside information provided by her mother (yay!), but why eveb get into thr back of the guy's car? Guess he turned her on and was a great kisser. I can almost buy the escape from reality angle while intoxicated and finally her subconscious lashed out calling the asshole Reggie, her husband's name. But author listed multiple other reasons as well (he was teasing me, we got into a competition and I'll show him, her line for cheating is way more forgiving than the MCs, etc) that make things confusing. Isn't it enough she was drunk, her mother provided info directly or indirectly to the asshoel how to seduce her, she was miserable and depressed since her mom was a wreck and her dad died, and oh yeah she was in lust with the guy.

Btw missed opportunity on not discussing the night of the confrontation. They were going out again. Even if the wife had no plans to do anything and drank soda water *she had already told the asshole off) and she had "conquered" her problem, why was the MIL taking her back out the next night after seeing her so distraught on the way home. No discussion about that.

That leads to the last point: the MIL. That was messed up. Maybe she did not think her daughter was getting so involved with the asshole (didn't know about kissing, emails, texts, etc). But then why the tips to bring down her early defenses (which alcoholic drinks, what songs, where to touch, don't get too aggressive, etc.). Wtf? That makes zero sense to get 10 minutes alone with her prospective new beau. Then after a month of her daughter hiding out and not going with her, she allows her daughter back a second time? Maybe she though that if she didn't go with her, her daughter was dumb enough to go alone. But if that is the case why not be vigilant for your daughter that night. Why not watch how much she drinks. Instead she made that worse. When daughter exposes her books to the whole club, step in and take her away and scold her realizing she is too drunk. Ok maybe she didn't see her giving the sshole her panties but she sure as heck should have known daughter went out to the parking lot again for her "test". Excuse yourself. Walk outside and be ready to intervene. Period! Full stop. And then to make it worse, while.hiding all this from her son-in-law, the NEXT night she is taking herbdaughter out again, clearly to go out clubbing, even if a different place (not discussed) , after seeing her daughter breakdown a second time? Wtf is wrong with Marta? With all of that happening there is no way the MC maintains a relationship with her. Maybe if he stays married and has grandkids then upgrade to cool and cordial Sure Marta is hurting but she is killing her daughter's marriage. Willingly! To hunt for male.sexual companionship for herself. Wtf?

Instead let the wife see her during daylight hours for the first 6 months. Allow contact to grow over time. Warn the wife and MIL that he will use a PI from time to time to follow his wife. And at the first sign of even flirting, he will enact a postnup (which is an absolute must in this case for reconciliation). Seriously him showing up two months later to be with her makes him into a Saint. Cannot believe that woukd fly in real life.

So some interesting premises. Lot of repetition. Racing part great. Confrontation was good. Dialog driven first 8 pages or so, but not as much monologuing. Sentences and paragraphs well written. Author's prose and use of language is quite good. Some minor editing issues. But cane off bloated. Too many reasons for what she did or did not do. MIL cane off as a Disney female villain, first couple of pages. Wife was unbelievably dumb. Trickle truth really dragged out the story and was annoying. Author pushed too far and had her wait two years to explain the first impact event (Evangelion reference) and how she had sex with the guy but soemhownshe didn’t think was cheating (not even the tip!).

Author's story but get an editor to pare down some of the bloat and repetition. More insight into what he is thinking and feeling. Why wait 2 years to come clean. Lighten up severity of first incident. Have the epiphany when the asshole starts taking his pants off. Then she messes up with intentional second incident that with one more drink, she would have been screwed (literally). Not sure how to work MIL mess. Get that part of the backbone of the storybwwa her being miserable and the two fo them and her friends pulling her through. But wow trickle truth to drag it out and do a rug pulls is not fun to read. Gets tiresome.

Ur title description doesn't make sense

Holy cow that anon wrote a story in the comment section. Didn't think a comment could be that long. If it is that long is it still considered a comment?

Such a good writer but why do you have to reenforce the same point again and again and again. I just stopped reading which is a shame.

Racing part was great. MIL was a psychotic bitch for first part of the story as she was deliberately using her daughter as bait at a club so she could f$ck a new beau after her husband died. The daughter was delusional and stupid. Her not thinking the first incident was cheating is wacky. Her rationale to go back a second time was just surreal and retarded. And the two of them going out the very next night before the intervention was just a huge undeveloped hole in the plot. Wtf?

IMHO good story about 6 chapters to long our as grandpa used to say Boy you beat that mule to death now bury it and move on!

Man, I thought the main character was never going to shut his mouth. Way too long for what it was. 3*

To the anon who wrote a whole story in the comment section. You're just as bad as this author. On and on and on. WTF

IMO far too long and rambling kept going over the same thing sorry I don't usually write negative comments

Well written story, thoroughly enjoyed it whilst having some sympathy with the "too long" brigade. That said, I¡d never dream of telling a writer how long or short a story should be, I consider it a gross impertinence from the whingers who after all aren't paying to read these stories.

I'm not a car buff in any way but got interested enough to do a little browsing part way through so knew about the 22M+ sale but that detail was neither here nor there for me in relation to the story.

I'd also congratulate you on having written a very credible reconciliation story which required a lot of hard work from all parties involved.

Our Reggie is a prince amongst men, not many would have reconciled not only with his errant wife but also his clearly demented, at the time of the cheating, M-I-L. More or less full redemption of all parties and yes, despite what the "lick her to the kerb" crowd think, it is just about possible in the real world, aided by the fact that Devon didn't actually fuck the scumbag and that both she and her mother were clearly grief-stricken when off the rails.

Very well done, thank you.