All Comments on 'Hell Hath No Fury Like a Woman Scorned'

There was a story by "Chicago" called "If She Would Have Been Faithfull" which states if the spouse was faithfull then they would have never met each other.

Applies in this story.

Yeah

98 lincoln continental-yes it has 32 valves but it is 4.6 liters and if a 302 is 5.0 liters (4.9 actually) do the math-only around 268 c.i.

455 c.i. my ass

cornhole gets buggered by a meaty cock, another smoked, betrayed!

turned into a profitable lifestyle. TK U MLJ LV NV

higher bidder this one will last till she gets a wild prick up her ass and needs a dose of vitamin dick from herckmer Jones who has this wonderful 7 inch hair less ding dong and a rocket powered vw yea you know the type all they are good for are sperm dumps

the conversation was so badly done I had trouble following it

Dear writer, please learn when to end a sentence. Please learn when to start a new sentence. It is too difficult to follow what is going on when you use so many run-on sentences.

For sharing this boring little story.

The writing is terrible. Maybe there's a good story there, but I can't find it amid all the sentence errors.

You end this on the note the Honeymoon was the beginning of the end/ then why the dumb fuck get remarried.. was a so-so story till then

If she had PROVEN that her husband had cheated and WAITED for the divorce. Well, then that would be different.

But, she did not.

First I have to agree you need an editor or learn what a sentence is and how to avoid run on sentences. The way you use language is interesting. You had some erudite statements but the grammar usage was inadequate. To Debbie- I don't think you took time to understand the ending. I am sure the author was alluding to the fact I tell some of my patients in marriage counseling when they are afraid of pain of separation. Every relationship has to end. It will be either by one of the partners choice or by death but they end. That is what the ending means not that they were bound to separate before death. The end does start at the beginning as it must.

How is that possible?

You're an English teacher? Is it any fucking wonder why so many kids these days don't know how to write properly when there are teachers out there like you who don't have a fucking clue! Not even worth rating this shit.

He starts off as the "other man", but turns out to be the "true love." The dialogue was pretty good-a bit stilted and artificial, perhaps. The punctuation, grammar and style problems were legion, though. I agree with other commenters-hard to believe you were an English teacher (unless you just refuse to carefully edit for a stroke-story site).

In my opinion he got what he deserved, she cheated on her first husband and will do the same with yhis one. Some guy will come around and do the same thing to him as he did to her first husband. They truely belong together.

Yeah, right. Either you're a liar, one of the worst English teachers ever, or lazy.

<P>

For example, you know jack shit about punctuating dialogue. By the time I was ten I learned that when one character is talking and they are uninterrupted by other characters or exposition, only the last paragraph has a closing quotation mark.

<P>

What's your fucking excuse?

But has a degree in history:)

Was it arrogance that you could type up an erotic tale and submit it and no one would notice because it is such a hot story? Or laziness that your first drafts are better than the final drafts of others? You have, in at least one point, our engineer talking directly to her in the third person in the first sentence and second person in the next sentence. I thought it was a good story, but the prequel sounds slippery...her cunt-hound hubby is trying for a threesome and that means that she can pick up some random prong in a bar? A great way to find true and eternal love!

When he says he was a Junior High 'English teacher'. What he doesn't mention, is that he was teaching basic conversational English in a village in a rural province of India! Hey, that's as likely an explanation as any.

It's easy to tell someone how to do something and how wrong they are when you hide behind anonamous. I checked the one critic who didn't hide behind anonamous to see how I could better myself but lo and behold he hadn't written a damn thing. So if all you do is read these stories to exercise your red pen save your effort I don't care. As for the religous fanatics I don't thgink I want to go to a heaven that they let you into. Yes I did teach English in the ghetto of a major American city for thirty years. I never owned a red pen I felt if you can get your thoughts and feelings on paper I'm happy.

theaquarianpen BS MS in education

The lack of periods (.) makes this virtually unreadable. Sentences just run together. I wonder how it turned out...

Tell me how this fragment: "A fleeting thought probably the blond from last night's husband." makes any sense. My first reading made me think it was the "last night's husband." That would mean either the narrator is gay or is a woman. My next reading suggested "the blond from last night." That makes a bit more sense. I was still confused, so I read it again. Oh, "A fleeting thought." Fleeting could be the noun (subject) and thought is the verb (predicate). I didn't know Fleetings could have thoughts. I finally figured out that perhaps the author meant something like. "The man approaching me is probably the husband of the blonde I screwed last night." Am I close?

Communication is much more clear when one uses the "rules" that the author claims to despise.

The Ex-husband admitted he TRIED to cheat but DID not cheat. The bitch fucked around without ANY proof and ditched her non-cheating husband. In fact she traded up, like all good gold digging bitches do. As for HER staying faithful? not a chance, and as for the man she picked up not wanting to be a "Home wrecker?" WTF? he did exactly that he is just another asshole. What a stupid story, The only person who deserves any sympathy is the husband, he got screwed by his bitch ex-wife in more ways than one, he is far better off without her.

A common aim to bring up common children, and here are not any. Perhaps in the future.

@ Anon Kim's husband told only to the narrator, he had not cheated that time. Kim told her husband was a serial cheater. Not everybody accuses he is a cheater.

I'm glad Frank got on with his life: he seemed like a good guy.

And our narrator: WTF: he picks up a married cheater and then he makes a life with her?

Well I hope he doesn't come home one day to find whore Kimmy with another man - No wait, I want him to come home and find slut Kimmy with another man!

So you hug him in the head! How does that not end in an arrest? Kim seems to be a slut and a whore selling herself for a slightly richer man I look forward to her taking the prick to the cleaners in a few years time. Also is the tiny plot of land he owns supposed to be impressive?

but the national creed puts that asunder 50% and rising, TK U MLJ LV NV

To all you wannbe english teachers, it's not AP's fault his keyboard has no commas!

tom anon

MAKE BELIVE PISS IS SUMMER RAIN.

UNO ESTRELLA

I saw no relationship between the title and the story. In the case of this tale I think that was a problem.

Like another commentator I don't think the title of this story fits the story. That is not to say that this is not a good story and enjoyable to read.

Should have been part of the Vegas victims. They die and you live? Not fair

He told Frank he was in that bar 3 or 4 nights a week. Frank waited for some time to pass, waited outside for him and put a bullet thru his head. Since he had played with many married women, the cops never looked twice at Frank. Soon after that, Frank left his wife, taking all the assets with him, including all the money he got from taking a second mortgage on their home. She had nothing and had to file for a divorce using abandonment. She ended up with nothing and no one. Your ending was just ludicrous.

Whole lot of cheating going on. Everybody plays and Wii eventually pay. Two cheaters get together, how can they believe that both won't cheat again? Kind of like Russian Roulette with two bullets.

Started out pretty good but devolved from that point. Far too many “wtf?” and “hith?” events to align with the ending.

He knowing beds married women and she cheats on her husband. Why would either trust enough to get married?

There is not a woman on this planet that I trust now.

Liked the story, nice piece of fiction. LP

Nah

A feel-good Femdom agitprop in which your wife is stolen by a good guy!

Horrible punctuation and word use (e.g., "too" when yo wanted "to.")