All Comments on 'High School Again? Ugh! Ch. 04'

You've obviously put some thought into this but it is still jumping around a little. Who gave him the do-over with Tara that she didn't leave? Hmmm.

I'll wait with everyone else to see how this goes. And watch out for life, it can bite you in the ass when you least expect it.

Congratulations, you've got me completely on the hook with these characters. Now please, oh please, don't make me wait so long for the next chapter!

One thing I like to suggest, though, since you do spend quality time thinking and rewriting the story, this series: <p>

Going to Las Vegas was good; it showed that the story was not single dimensional, mostly only in his head or in his small town. The meeting of odd people, interesting places... the self-doubts, the silly interactions with others, strangers and known... <p>

The NEXT LEVEL you might want to talk about, if you really want to expand the story into a full time traveled story of some serious nature, is to go ahead and bring the larger world into the story. The gambling on sporting events, etc., for some money, was find. Just don't over do it, like most writers who write time traveling stories do, especially the average ones who don't have bigger and better ideas other than having their hero gambling, fuck all kinds of beautiful women, live some useless burnt out atheletes who squander tens of millions but never really do much to understand themselves or society, never develop any skills or serious work outside of their long-forgotten atheleticism... <p>

For the hero, for YOUR STORY HERE, to go behond those cliche themes of sex, money, lavish lifestyle, whath-not..... You need to move on to tackling bigger, more complex issues... and you SEEM to have developed a COMPLEX and thoughtful hero character who SEEMED to have the ability as well as willingness to do those "bigger things." If for no bigger reason, to understand that every moment counts, no matter where you are in time, no matter even if you travel back in time!... That you have to think and do things bigger and more meaningful than just satisfying your own narcissism.... <p>

Anyway, again, it is still very enjoyable and your having taken the long months to think about it, write it and rewriting it, paid off.... Although it (the story and the hero in it) is still mostly at the personal-psychological level... the jump into having a larger sociological, historical context of bigger ideas, bigger development beyond his daily physical and psychological needs... that jump seems very possible and needed, in my view...

I've been following this story since the day you posted the first chapter & I think it's an incredible idea. I definitely like how your story is playing out, & suspense around tara helps....

But please don't make us wait for months again for the next chapter... I checked everyday on your submissions page...

Can't wait for the next chapter

The "it was all a dream" do-over struck me as a bit cliche but otherwise a great story

Keep writing on this if you can. Love this story.

I enjoyed it. Interest movement in the story line. There are others of yours I'm hoping you update as well. I must admit I've enjoyed a lot of your stories. I'm still reading through them, but I noticed this update and had to catch up. I may email you when I get to the end.

Greatly enjoy the story and can't wait for the next chapter. So far this story and "Joel and Carrie" both have to rank in my top five on this site. Keep up the great work.

From Jerry, SW Washington State, USA - I've enjoyed this story so far, even though it is much darker than I expected when the story first started. I care about the main characters John and Tara, so I will stay with story as long as you write it. One significant oops - unless the Gods protected John somehow, you have to be 21 to bet in Las Vegas and John is only 18. I didn't notice the age qualification being addressed in the story. I'm disappointed that it appears that John won't be allowed to tell anyone his real situation. I understand the need for "just a dream" to show that Tara would not be able to accept his story without feeling that he is crazy - but the scene came across too much like the "Bobby Ewing in the shower - it was all a dream" scene from the TV series Dallas years ago. But I still enjoyed this chapter and I liked how John played the bets. I also liked how he made an "adult" friend who helped John realized he needed to call his parents and Tara. I realize it does take time to figure how the story is going to develop, but I hope the next chapter shows up much faster than this one did. I have been checking this story daily to see if a next chapter is available.

Tara's story is probably about the same as what he dreamed, but she does have to tell him, even if it is the same. But he HAS to tell her the truth. I don't think he did a real good job of telling her in his dream. He needs to start at the beginning and go thru how it happened, even if he has to get the Gods into it. If he does that, she will believe. She loves him enough.

why is he so scared of being happy? he was miserable on his past life but seems to prefer it. just cant relate, i guess. oh well.

I really enjoyed this story. Please finish it soon!

I just love your stories. This is everyone's dream, the oportunity to go back in time and relive certain days or oportunities. There is so much more that you and these charecters can do here. Please keep up your hard work and continue this story.

Well you've certainly put a different spin on the whole going back in time and reliving your past scenario. It'll be interesting to see where you go from here.

Definitely continue with this storyline.

I see so many way this could go I am curious as to where you are going to take it

I'm really enjoying this series, really well written. The Non sex scenes are as compelling as the erotic stuff. I lookforward to more.

Please, I love your stories specially this one, so please send us the next chapters ...

Regards,

-- a fan --

JD, you have a good story going here, please do not leave us hanging.

This is one of the better stories on here, I hope it continues

you always come up with great stories, and now hopefully you'll post a new chapter soon.

I honestly feel that you have an excellent story here. I feel the character of John is an honest and caring person, placed within an 18-year old shell. I feel he is a relatable character and that the pacing of this story is very decent. In regards to your this chapter, I must say that it was still good, but the dream bugged me a bit. While it played its role in suspense-building, I felt that it was a little bit of "cop-out" to just label it as a dream. It might have actually turned out more interesting if future chapters were to detail how he tries to prove it, though that might be a little out of character for Tara (from how you portray her, she is very loving and devoted), so it might be impossible for her to do that. I feel a little "egged" by the (internal) piece where he states he won't tell her about it, because it seems to be delaying the inevitable (but I'm probably biased based on my preferences). Overall though, I have little to criticize, your style is decent and believable, you have very little spelling mistakes (at most 2 in a chapter), and your characters hold depth to them. The more erotic scenes are also quite enticing and interesting, and the development of the story is interesting and well-paced. I really liked this work, and I hope you will continue/update it soon.

P.S. I am a little perturbed, as to when he falls asleep, as he states (in the end) about her past, and the big reveal, but all (most?) of this chapter was in the nightmare, wasn't it? So, when did he fall asleep? Or was the secret part of the nightmare? Hopefully it isn't as it would have unnecessarily subjected the readers to the image of that bastard uncle doing the deed.

I love this storyline. I like the mix of fantasy and myth with very realistic descriptions. But PLEASE, get a decent editor to help you out. Your grammar is flaky on more than one occasion in this episode (the previous ones were better, does this have something to do with you feeling rushed, as per your introduction to the chapter?), but your spelling mistakes are legion!

Chad001, no offence, but if you can only find two spelling errors in this chapter, your command of English is questionable!

I loved this story the first time I read it ,and now rereading it because of the new chapter, I love it more. Except--- the immediate next chapter is where I think the plot goes off the tracks. (Excuse the bad cliche'.) The part of the plot where Tera is taken from him and then raped again is just too much angst in the plot. Too much for the characters to recover from. I am not certain what the last chapter written holds but that plot line truly does not work for me. Loved the way the author has shown the complexity of all the choices. In my workshops on quantum mechanics, string theory and chaos theory ( think the butterfly effect) I have covered these kinds of questions. This fiction does it much better. One disagreement I have. There is a sub theory among certain physicists. It is called something like Universes 10 to the 10th power. It means that with our decisions we create another universe that diverges from that moment from the base universe. Instead of just one then we have 2. Then we have a google plex number soon with other decisions. In this theory then the base uni would still exist. Makes for interesting and complicated story lines uses the characters in this story. By the way love the way the author develops the characters. Easily to identify with them which is not easy to do when writing fantasy. Now I will shut up and read the final chapters. Thank you Joe

It has been a fascinating ride, so far.

Please proof read - or get an editor. There are so many grammatical and spelling errors it seriously distracts the reader. Maybe read three or four sentences, then half a dozen more errors pop out. Not only spelling but obviously missing words. Sometimes I think you just type and post without rereading it once.

I like your stories and style - but help us please.

Get over the errors, the world isn't perfect :D

I was enjoying the story thus far, and I was with you up until Tara + John started getting busy in bed. The exclamation of love was far too quick, and felt forced. The sex that followed seemed base, and too 'porn-by-the-numbers', that it stood out. It's fine for John to be a horndog while doing the gym teacher et al, but he is supposed to have genuine feeling for this girl, and as such, would actually 'make love' to her, rather than 'fuck her'. Also, the play-by-play of the sex scene made it sound directed, as if we were on the set of a porn movie:

"ok, go down on him"

"good good, now cum in her mouth"

"swallow..swallow..and CUT! Very good people"

For me, this went from a piece of erotica to cheap porn, and I've lost my interest in finding out what happens with John and Tara. =(

Please Joe don't leave this story hanging it is to good to be left unfinished

vegas? what the fuck is this idiocy? what happened to high school?

and why the hell is he such a whiny pussy when he's been given the best gift EVER?

you are an amazing story teller. that's the best I can think to say. Thank you for the entertainment

First off, the overall story is Great. The sex is very good, but there is one phrase that is quite literally ruining your whole series. First three star rating and I'm really sad to do it but also struggling not to drop it to two.

What's the big deal? He needs to stop asking "Are you ok?"

It totally fucking ruined several really good moments, especially after the tender scenes with Tara.

The first few times he did so were with each of the women he screwed. This was Completely Unnecessary, but the repetition stuck out so that when he asked again and again later, when they were genuine and appropriate, they rang either false or irritating.

Definitely take it out for the early ones because really they aren't even appropriate for the timing... it's like he's concerned that he offended or hurt them for having sex with them even with the older two, and there is absolutely no sign given by any of them that they are in any kind of distress. OK, the teacher may have been reasonable, but by then it was the third time he'd screwed a chick and asked the same exact question out of the blue.

In short, take some time and look for a different phrase to ask to show that he's being kind and interested in his partner.

lol, ok, I was so worked up over the stupid 'are you ok' nonsense that I forgot how griping that 'insight' or 'mini-rewind' or whatever it was where Tara left after he told her the truth and then he woke up and it hadn't happened. That was stunning, and not letting us know how it happened was really smart.

OK, this has been an amazing read, but you seem to be getting caught up in this supernatural greek gods thing if he's gonna have his mind - and hers - screwed with that badly. I hope you aren't going that direction, but this was such an incredibly detailed romantic / do-over story until the gods started playing with their minds. What's the point? You have a good story here, with good characters and real conflicts to work-out in real life, why use the crutch of gods and goddesses any more than what you have? I do hope you get back to the story of John and Tara and their lives.

Wow this chapter is definitely much better than last one! Thank you!

wtf is with this pussy ass weak shit??

wtf is with great ass story??

Really, really good story!!!