All Comments on 'High School Reunion Payback'

he became a bigger asshole then the ones he hated.

But none of your characters were likeable and the sex was not very attractive. This does not even feel like your work.

Mr (or Ms) anonymous, if you haven't been there you don't have a clue. Years of abuse boil over and the jerks who become available after perpetuating the abuse suffer the consequences.

I've been there, done that. And closure is pretty awesome when you haven't been able to overcome in your youth.

The story is not a "nice" story, but is very apt for those of us who suffered like fates when we were young.

government we have. It was an excellent story of a man who was abused simply getting back for the little guys and finding peace. He did nothing illegal per se, might be a bit edgy on getting her to the room but she was already a whore. Nice to find a woman really loves you. You still need proofreading as in "Every time I licked, Brenda would drive her pussy into his face and scream out". The implication of the wording is when he licked her she shoved her pussy into another man's face, not quite what was mean to be said. Not bad but it can be smoother. You didnt paint him as a cuck or and idiot and many will give you grief over that. Dont worry, there is a lot of difference between men and little boys such as Jim in the story and cucks.

Keep at it.

But then was just a sad vindictive story.

the characters were sad people in a sad commentary on the need for retribution.

You write well, but ... The protagonist was a jerk. Everyone else is either wonderful or evil. Brenda should avoid this guy - he goes way over the top. Frankly, I did not even find it entertaining, I stopped after Linda's set up. - Ttom

Fucking get over it. Vile fucking story made you look sadder than any other cunt.

Every single aspect of this story has been done a million times and beaten death on Literotica - the nerd who becomes rich and buff, the football star who is still a jerk, the one girl who was nice to him and the revenge on the mean girl. Nothing unique at all. AND you still, In EVERY STORY YOU WRITE, slip back and forth between first and third person narrative. How can you make that mistake EVERY TIME??

fantasy. You hit every hot button for those of us with glasses, books, good grades, and pens leaking in our breast pockets, and the memory of girls laughing at us. Amazing that now those same people who did not crack a book or thought their sports skills would make them millions work for us and depend on our intelligence to have a job and make a living. Yup! That's the fantsy. Got give it 100 just for making it coherent and the hero happy!!!

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.

Any one who has ever been in a large school knows about social groups and hierarchies and their location in the pecking order at least in the general sense. Geeks more so than some of the others, their acceptance level varies from good to bad and all points between, but you always know what the score is and who the players are. No body in his right mind would have asked one of the popular girls that had a boyfriend to a dance, unless he had lost a bet or was in the process of winning one. And then you go on to say this same person is a super intelligent business savvy type. No way. Any humiliation he got from that dance thing was all on his ignorant dumb ass.

Yes, it was a nerd's interesting fantasy but the author did a pretty good job with it. Thanks and this type of story from this author sure beats some of his other "wimp husband - slut wife = reconciliation shit stories.

I really enjoyed the hell out of it!

it seems like a nerd would keep the POV straight and know that the contraction for you are is "you're". This story sounded like something a kid in junior high would dream up during a study hall. It is just childish.

The lesson is: being a rich sociopath wins the day, I guess.

i realized why everyone wanted to kick his ugly buttocks. the prick is a total prick, who designs silly games for other losers like him...

excellent story, always love when the bottom guy comes on top, sounds something like bill gates would write if he was on here. keep up the good work and forget the assholes leaving bad comments they are probably the linda and jim of the world. thanks

I get it. He was picked on in high school and now wanted his revenge. Pretty shallow. Usually, people that are picked on try to stay below the radar and observe others trying to figure out why they behave the way they do. Oviously, this guy isn't too smart because he didn't learn anything about people. Instead of being the better man he goes after these people that already lead a pathetic life and beats them down even more. I did like the quote, "After one workout I looked at my six pack and wished I had this body in high school" Wow, one workout, he tones up pretty fast. I know it was a grammatical error but it was pretty funny like he looked at a six pack after one workout and like what he saw. Where was I? Oh yeah. It's pretty hard to like a person that holds a grudge then gets even several years later using morally questionable behavior and breaking a few laws in the process. It seems his maturity level is the same as it was in high school. Now if he just went to the reunion with Brenda on his arm and having a well known reputation of helping others by donating millions to women and childrens' cancer centers and other needy charities with everyboby that's anybody knows and respects who he is, would have been revenge enough. He was no better than the people who picked on him in high school except when they picked on him they were kids and when he got even he was an adult. All be it a very shallow immature adult with no empathy for those whose lives turned out to be less than his. He didn't even stop to think that those kids in high school were slaves to their up bringing. Their parents were probably abusive alcholics turning their kids into people just like themselves. They should have been pitied not suffering delayed punishment. Besides it was probably those people that made him what he was today. Nope, this man had no redeeming qualities at all except for his money. Not one of your better stories.

damn son, this is a real fantastic story! you got right this time. keep working .......... ok.

Good story,enjoyed it.But when did karin go from being a redhead in the first few paragraphs to a girl with short brown hair in the next one,lol,,,a good read though.

you are far to good a writer to put out something like this...

although that stuff about they should be pitied is a bit much. the best revenge would have just been to live well .. then again he can still do that and get them thrown out on their asses - but it's just the pettiness of it that makes this story bad. revenge should be almost instantaneous, not years later when the avenger is an adult.

Great story

Hey, please be consistent. Use first person all the way through. Don't go chaning to third for a couple of paragraphs and then back. It makes the story confusing.

nuff said.

The guy was just too big of an asshole I meek what a real piece of shit hopefully karma will really fuck him over in the future and if karma doesn't then I'm sure that ever Jim of Linda will get some kind of revenge probably involving a gun and a hedge trimmer.

We don't like it when we read a story about a good guy whose wife cheats on him. She files for divorce, gets some maintenance, the kids, and child support, and then moves her lover in with her and the kids. We don't like it because it violates our sense of what's fair. In this story, that isn't the case. Here, it's the revenge that is so over the top that it's not fair. Keith had practically no contact in high school with Linda except one time when she was rude to him when he asked her to dance.

That just doesn't justify ruining her life years later, even if she isn't a nice person. If we accept the premise his actions are justified, you have to accept that Linda would be justified in killing him for what he did to her. Writing was excellent, but I didn't like the plot.

Two famous sayings justify this wonderful tale, 1. What goes around, comes around. & 2 As you sow, so shall you reap.

Well done, keep trucking !

mackenzie51

He didn't go far enough in my opinion. It would have been different if the jock and cheerleader had changed there ways but instead they both got worse. As for geeks knowing not to ask hot girls out its called hope. Geek revenge was good! Keep up the good work puff

This story seemed written by someone who lacked everything he made the protagonist with...

For some reason, the nerd doesn't get my empathy.

Did NOT enjoy that story. While we all went through the same thing in HS, either nerd or jock, something about this story just wasn't right. Perhaps the over-the-top need for revenge? I'm not sure.....

Also, writers need to understand a little more about female virginity. My wife had to wait 2 full weeks before she could have sex again after losing her virginity. Even the second and third times she bled and didn't enjoy it a bit. Perhaps because her boyfriend at the time was about as big as the nerd in this story, which makes it seem even more unbelievable. Women at the most seldom ever enjoy the first few times.

Love your writing. The way you put words together. The way you plot. How you show that for one character it is BTB but for another the character says let's do what we can to make it. This one not so much. He now deserves payback. If I had time to write or had Dragon for word recognition, I would wrilte a story along the same lines uses Linda as the one getting it. Not something destructive to the wife and family just something that would allow him to learn he was an asshole at the reunion. Yuk Yuk Yuk for this story.

Outing Jim to his employer and Linda to her husband was doing a good turn for the employer and husband as well as payback. Blackmailing Linda into the sex was just lowering himself to - and possibly below - their scummy level. Better to let the husband burn both Linda and her lover - who ends up not suffering at all, it seems.

But kudos to him for going back for the nerdy girl who really cared for him instead of succumbing to the lure of the many gorgeous money grubbers he might have gone for instead.

and the art of growing and maturing, we hope, TK U MLJ LV NV

"I moved between her legs and spread them as wide as he could."

You change from 1st to 3rd person within the same sentence! If you are telling your story, it should have been "as wide as I could." If you are telling someone else's story, it should be "He moved between her legs."

I've noticed this in many of your stories.

I'm a little disappointed in Slirpuff for the nature of the revenge on Linda. Certainly she deserved some but rape is beneath what I expect from this author

he also has some serious anger management issues.

one does not negate the other.

The protagonist is a pathetic character.

Complete agreement with "Johnny1M" way back in 2012.

...and poorly written besides.

thanks for the effort.

Sounded like the girl was set up for a rape by the two guys. Sounds a little extreme for being laughed at in the past.

yes it was a fantasy of sorts. obviously some of the commenters have not been on the shitty end of the stick through their school years. I saw a lot of that shit in my time and tried to always stick up for the little guy, or geek as it were. no I didn't always win, but could hold my own. what the story told was only one of numerous daily frustrations he had to live through, and still maintain a scholastic standing. some of these commenters couldn't live a week on the shitty end of the stick.

Please seek professional help

She may have been a cheating bitch, but the blackmail/rape should have been enough payback. To then send film of it to her husband and lover was too much.

What the fuck are you talking about?? She's a whore who laughed at and looked down on him all through their school days and his investigator found out that she's cheating on her husband and shitting on her marriage vows so why would a cunt who's never given mercy deserve any? Don't forget the two ex-football players who fucked her in that hotel room. While she got the glory for being their cheerleader, she looked down on THEM, too.

If for no other reason, her husband deserved to know what she was doing behind his back to disgrace him and show her contempt for him. What he should have included to her husband was a note giving her boyfriends name and address and saying that a copy of the video had also been sent to him. That way, he has the guys' name and address to use in his divorce action. Fuck that bitch and fuck you sbrooks103 for even considering going soft on the life long arrogant bitch who you've seen is no better than a common cheating slut. She was ALL IN on those black cocks and the cameras showed it to her husband and her boyfriend. He SHOULD have made and sent copies to her father, her mother and each of any of her brothers and sisters. Who knows how much she lorded over one or more of them? What a now and forever crash and burn that video would be in their hands.

What can be said. It was a funny story with some humor. Burn them all. THE END

and how much is too much, TK U MLJ LV NV

I don't think Brenda is going to like the new version of her friend.

Hero goes from ugly duckling nerd to rock hard fighting machine computer genius millionaire stud. Exacts revenge by committing a felony blackmail sexual assault on chick who hurt his feelings in high school before rescuing damsel in distress nerd girl from her life of poverty with with his huge cock and millions of dollars.

You want cliches, this story has them! Hero is perfection reborn and the baddies are pure evil that must be destroyed. A very badly written story, the author should feel bad for writing it and anyone that liked it should feel bad, because you have bad taste.

This dickless anonymous is just another loser jock! Us geeks loved this story because in a lot of instances it rings true life! Us geeks were always geniuses in school you dummy. When computers came along we made a bundle of money. Just look at Bill Gates and the other geek billionaires, dickless!

Your story could have been taken from any high school reunion, since there are so many assholes out there. I have been able to see a few of the assholes from my high school days, "Paying The Piper" in spades. This means that your story struck a happy nerve with me. Well written, sexy, romantic when needed, and just a fun story to read. Thanks!

Says the whiny little bitch living in a shitty apartment selling appliances to soccer moms.

I think America is the only country on earth where people who are good in their studies back in school are automatically bad in sports and vice versa. Hence why they use words like nerds, geeks etc.

For instance, back in school and college I was in every sport team I was interested in - I was a starter in Basketball. I was in track and field viz - long jump and 400 m race. Played footbal as central defender.

But in my studies I wasn't any slouch either - I was always in the top 7 performers in terms of exam and test points scored.

And also, it is my belief that people who are healthy, play sports in high school/colleges usually are more happy, and are more polite to other people.

But those people without any talent or passion for anything, going for the ride and never really participate in any activity. Those people tend to stay back and complain a lot. And they usually has shit to say about everybody and everything.

And also, I'm really confused about you Americans. Do you mean to tell me that amongst your entire populace there isn't anyone out there who was a top academic in school, can play sports like the best of them. And sometimes can play PC/Console games viz.. first person shooting/wrestling/team sports/strategy games etc or enjoy a good book

Yeah, yeah - the revenge part of the story ain't bad. Not original at all, but still not bad.

The description of Keith's conquests leave a lot to be desire, and, given that him fucking babes is a big part of the story, it's a big reason why it's not a very good story overall. So, evidently, Karin went from a redhead to having brow hair (don't know why the author didn't simply called it 'auburn' and leave it at that), but, at least, the reader still have a description of her... but what Brenda, the woman who turned out to be Keith's greatest love? What's her hair color? How tall is she? Does she have any curves? Does she wear glasses? Any description of her face? I mean, except for the fact they grew up together and were nice to one other back then, WHAT EXACTLY IS THE ATTRACTION FOR KEITH TO GO FOR BRENDA AFTER ALL OF THOSE YEARS?

No answer. None whatsoever to any of those questions.

So this half-baked story only deserved a half-baked rating.

Could have been a 4 or 5 page story, the end was very hurried And we could have had a lot more of a happy ever after.

inhaving the green monkey fornicaters rape with ur consent

1 star

read a few of ur slurp slurp tales( actually just skimmed after 1st 1/2 page)

all are true to slurpy puffy mentality

He gets to the party ,that as started,talks to Brenda for hours,sorts Linda out and it is not yet seven oclock?.Also who was looking after Brenda's mother whilst they were shagging all weekend.

I think he was a bit hard on Linda he humiliated her with himself and especially the two black guys,so that should have been enough.

No.

He did one thing in his life to become a millionaire, fucked the company whore, used his money to dig up dirt on people who he hadn't seen since high school, blackmailed a married woman for sex, had her raped, taunted a guy into a fight who he knew he could beat and had him fired. This guy is a bigger asshole than the two high school people could ever be. He could have just shown up and flaunted his success in their faces but, no, he had to destroy their lives. What a prick.

That this is FICTION!!!

The author needs to revisit the timescales on the reunion first day,unless he knows how to make time to backwards.Also if he was dancing with Brenda how did he happen to have the photos he threw at Jim in his ?hand

Definitely not up to the authors usual standards. Reminds me of the Imagine Dragon song Thunder. Full of teenage angst, petty revenge and basic insecurity overcompensation.

He was a bit tough on Linda .He humiliated her ,including having her raped,so to send her husband the video was a mean trick.

To create a lead character so lacking in reader sympathy has got to be a sign of a well written story. The opening had us looking forward to him getting his deserved revenge but by the middle of the story we realized that he was more arrogant then any of his classmates and he had become a bigger bully and asshole then his former nemesis.

if u left out the green monkey fornicators

1 str

Turned out to be okay. Thought he overdid the revenge thing a bit, especially with Linda. Most of us after 10 years kind of over looked the high school stupidity.

1* Was the author badly bullied in high school? Needed fictional over the top revenge? Lead character should in prison for what happened to Linda, like Weinstein.

Maybe a little too much revenge for high school rejection, especially using the loser black dildos for ultimate humiliation. Hate to see a writer like Slirpuff use that tired cliche.

Sending the tape to Linda's husband was over the top.He had already humiliated her.

One of My best friends in High School made it Big also as a Daytrader .. I am so Happy and glad for him . In High School He had no dates .. Now the girls are after him all the time . He worries that they want his money and not him . He offered to buy Me a Car .. I said for him to save it .. I am a CPA and am doing OK for myself . I am driving a Shelby Mustang . I also have a 4 wheel drive Dodge Ram pick up .

Two things this guy never learned:

• It's "USED TO," not "USE TO." What in hell does his editor even do?

• You don't just flop between first person and third person willy nilly. It's just amazing that he doesn't understand this, but he does it in at least half his stories.

Beyond that, it's just another clichéd high-school-revenge fantasy, and we've heard it all before.

For a geek like me this would be the ultimate. Well done!

What an asshole

Is this really a Slirpuff story? It was just a bunch of sex with a real asshole..

So he became a borderline rapist huh? Your protagonist became a bigger piece of shit than the original antagonists.

We are all eagerly awaiting this author's eighth, ninth or tenth birthday, when perhaps his pre-pubescent hormonal tsunami tidal washes might begin to synchronise his autistic rantings with his physical sexual development and minor mindset!

Right now they only highlight his issues, which is something that both he and his readers should be protected from just now.

It's like you were born in the '10s, 1910s. Only thing's missing is calling the black people "boy" and gathering a lynch mob. It reads like goonies with an extra dollop of racism.

I like the spirit of the Geek returning as a "Champ", but this was writing overkill. Rich, sculpted, 8", martial artist, etc. I think a more humble approach would have been appealing. Bringing down the bullies could have been achieved by strictly exposing their preexisting cheating.

Crapola!

Great story, with an especially goog ending. Thanks for your writing.

Don't sweat comments from assholes that are nothing but jerks to everyone. I felt the ending was rushed but it's my opinion. You wrote creatively and clearly, I read constantly but seldom read here. Thank you for a nice read.

Great story but deserves to be expanded to more than 2 chapters otherwise excellent revenge tale.

Liked the story but the ending, a bit rushed, needs to be lengthened. Well written. 4 stars Bob

When he opened the door to Karin, she was a redhead, a few sentences later, she had short, brown, hair.

I must admit that, despite the number of errors, I did enjoy the story.

Think his treatment of Linda was over the top.The sex with the black guys was rape and he should have left it at that,not outed her to her husband.

Very cool story for all us geeks. I so wanted to hear more though. TY!

Nitpick below thinks it rape, while possible, sluts seldom AVOID sex. Exposure to male sex organs generally elicit fucking behavior in the SLUTIS AMERICANUS species. R. H.

Umm it clearly was rape. He used blackmail to get her into the room and coerce her to suck him off. Then brought in the two black ex-football players and they started forcing themselves on her. They also forcibly sodomized her. She also knew if she didn't go with the program, the other photos would sink her. Her acquiescence is not consent.

Your story is great its nice to have a happy ending Chris

Wow! This has got to be the most fantastic fantasy on Literotica. You know how when you go to a family function, you are instantly the youngest, the wildest or whatever your station when you were young. Well, guess what? Dream on people...

loved it!!

He started down a shitheal path but then his plan included rape? Nah mate. What kind of a man can get hard knowing the woman doesn't want to be there?

Cliché that I still enjoyed. Although at the beginning there was Karin the redhead with brown hair, Confusing!

I didn’t have it this bad but it was nice to drive my 911 turbo to my class reunion.

2/5

Linda blackmail rape as a revenge for high school bitchiness paint the MC as the true villain of the story, with all other transgressions petty by comparison. Not in line with general 'decent genius geek gets rich, comes back after several years to take revenge on bullies, gets the girl and lives happily ever after' fairy tale