All Comments on 'Home for Spring Break'

Pretty good story though may be worth getting someone to proof read it for you to remove some of the mistakes, but overall I enjoyed the story.

I really do not approve of stories which allege that someone who is raped enjoyed it. They could encourage irresponsible and criminal behaviour.

Sorry, but this is not good, for me at least. I've read some of the comments so I guess I'm not alone. I personally don't like these types of stories since it involves rape and this shit would never actually happen. And it creeps me out that a woman brother would find her slutty and sexy. Its just very disturbing to me. I know some people like the taboo genre of this stuff but her brother in a way just straight up raped her and I despise that stuff. I have my reasons for doing so but it's sickening to me. Anyway that's my thoughts. Maybe your next story should involve more realism and no rape, okay?

I enjoyed your story and found it a great first story. I like your writing style. I think you would have better feedback if you submitted it as a non-consent story, there are people who this type of fantasy appeals (myself included) to but for some people it is off-putting especially with how consent is a very hot button issue as of late.

And to the commenters who are concerned about this encouraging rape remember that these are fantasy stories. You're reading a fantasy story about boinking your sibling but it doesn't mean that you would actually participate in incest, it's just a fantasy or fetish.

I was really interested in reading this but after a few paragraphs I had to stop. Your grammar is horrendous to the point it's flat out annoying. "..carried out the bags..."

"...I'd come home from a week!..."

Seriously did you even try to read this after you wrote it?

That aside, all this bitching about rape and shit is fucking ridiculous. First of all people, the title of this section is Incest and Taboo. So let's analyze it for a moment.

1. He fucks his sister. Incest

2. Rape is a form of taboo like it or not

Also on top of it: IT'S A FUCKING STORY! In addition, I love the comment about how such things will put things into peoples heads yet the same philosophy can be applied to this section in regards to incest. I seen it on the forum where people are so influenced they are seriously considering making a move on their mother.

Granted I have met my fair share of freaky moms that it would work in the son favor but if you play the odds, probably not.

Anyway the commentators on here are hypocritical and the author needs help in regards to writing.

*

When will people realize that, in general, on this incest takes precedence over all other content in a story? I say in general because there have a few exceptions, but it's been that way since the site started.

This was a sexy story, especially for your first attempt. Don't listen to the haters... it's a fucking incest *story* for Christ's sake (it doesn't mean you actually want to fuck your brother). I think that alone usually comes with a power exchange of some sort. Makes you wonder why the people who are leaving nasty comments are reading the genre to begin with?

They're okay with the brother and sister fucking, but her consent was dubious at first, so THAT'S what makes the story wrong? Oh, okay. LOL

The whole premise is wrong, taboo, and sexy a.f. Keep writing.

Did you read this at all? Man, the mistakes were too numerous. To the point of ruining it.

That was a good first story .Keep going and thanks for the read.

If I was in his position I would have done the same thing. Almost did a few times but each time someone was in the room and fucked it up for us.

Honestly, the sex scene was where you really did your best work. The rest of it was average at best. There were a lot of errors, too many to miss if you had read it before uploading it, which I highly recommend you do. There were missing commas, misspelled words, misused words, normal stuff like that, but not as horrendous as some would think. I've read worse, and it is your first attempt. Also, you used chicks three or four times in the same paragraph, almost right after one another. try to vary your descriptive words. Also it was a quick turn around for both of your characters. The brother had no problem basically raping his drunk sister, and once she woke up she had no problem loving it. It's a bit weird. I would've liked more build up, and some more explanation. Your sex scene though, I cannot, and will not, fault. Like I said, that's where you really hit your stride. Try to focus on the other bits more though. It can get boring, and if you're new to writing its easy to make that mistake. You want to get to the action, and skim over the boring bits, but for the action to be impactful, the reader has to be invested. The boring bits are where you draw them in, the action is where you blow them away.

While I gave your story 5*, you do need an editor. I have used Zoomie69, please check out his Lt Volunteer Editor profile. He has helped my stories, I think he can help you to get those "H" icons. BTW, be sure to read what he does and doesn't edit since he is "specific" about that. Good luck in future stories, I think you have talent that just needs some 'polishing'.

Mmm great story, I could imagine me in the story.

Real would be better though.

It's good overall, but the cervix just isn't a sexy body part. Not to mention a penis would have to be abnormally short in order to avaid touching the cervix during sex, so using that as a matker for how huge the penis is takes any woman out of the moment when reading this.

Hey ! I need your help in writing a story.. but for some reason i am not able to lgin my account, hence posting this here as anonymous.

My email is kkkingkkkong@yahoo.com

Pls send me a mail and i will respond to it with my story

Thanks much. Loved it