by MR. Gibson
Keep up the tit play - defintely time for the parents to find out, don't you think? :)
This was one of the worst written stories I have ever wasted the time to read. Is it really necessary to use the name Donna 60 times in a 1 page story?
Good base. More sex detail needed. Keep the relationship going. Keep the story going. Keep them in love
Good story I enjoyed reading it. Your story needs more finessing and definately more detail. Please continue with another sequel and take your time setting up every scene with delicious details to paint the pictures!
Thanks for writing.
sexmate
I think you have a great story here, and I hope you continue to develop the relationship. I would enjoy more detailed descriptions, and interplay between the two girls.
absolutly brilliant for your first incest story maybe you could bring the mom and dad into the action that would be a twist in the story line be carefull not to mention Donna so many times in the future maybe you could refer to her as sis. Try ro understand a womens body when it comes down to the sex theres more than just tits ass and pussy imagine yourself as a woman and think about where you would like to be touched and write it down.BECOME PART OF THE FICTION DONT JUST WRITE IT.
Great story!! BTW, the person who gave you a 00 rating has to much time on their hands and no imagination what so ever
Well - I dont know where you get your boobs sizes from - but 48DD - that is ridiculous - she would not be able to walk upright and end up with a humpback - most mothers with milk dont get that big when they are feeding their babies - not if they are not BBW's - get some facts right and dont keep repeating the sisters name all the time - otherwise the idea was not too bad - maybe they can find out that the Mom and Dad are brother and sister??????
ruin at the begining a girl that was a 48"DD could never have a 22" waist it would snap with all that weight up top also no way would a girl that big ever be a cheerleader never happen it was so bad i couldn't finish to unrealistic keep it beleivable from now on
Wowo not another sister with huge breasts and a brother with a huge cock.
but the repetition kinda spoiled some of the HOT scenes. Using words like 'massive', 'explosive' and 'mightily' are a good choice but not when they are over used in the same sentence or adjoining sentences. Please keep writing as some of your adjectives were very creative. Especially the one where his cock was hard enough to drill into concrete.
For a story, it was okay. But, honestly, it makes it seem like you've never seen a girl before! 48DD is an okay breast size- but if you're going to give them to a girl, give them to one who can support them! The majority of women don't have a 22" waist - that's not even a size 00 (US)!
Please, next time, be realistic.
Love thy sister as thyself.
Gotta love a good incest story. Not sure I could have waited til she was 18. Thank you for sharing your vision and talents.