All Comments on 'Hubris at Sea'

I am sooo sorry that this got posted late. Randi is a great stupid and did not notice. Very sorry and a very good story.

You are most gracious.

Not a bit little tale. BAS is fitting.

The potential was there for a good story, but clearly the background knowledge of ships is not. A ship built as a small cruise ship could never be operated by only two inexperienced morons. You took things to the extreme on too many things. The fact that they were able to settle immediately for $10 million, the size of the ship, the way his wife acted, the story of the other husband killing himself. Back it down a little next time and maybe it might work better for you.

Yes people really do act that stupid. Yes people even act that stupid recording themselves. Don't believe me? Look at Youtube, Instagram, Snapchat etc.

I didn't feel bad at all for the wife because nothing was said about her. All we knew was that she was the cheating wife and that was it. Not saying that's bad or not, just an opinion.

But it felt like there was SO much left out. The beginning was fine. The middle, into the Judge's chambers was fine. But then it went light weight and at light speed. Wouldn't there have been some negotiations about a payoff and no Courtroom drama and the ensuing expose? Was the lawsuit against just the Brothers or was the firm included? Why would his wife agree to even "falsely" trash her husband on a video? That seemed odd. Why wouldn't Karen hire an attorney? Her husband may have a restraining order but wouldn't she want to get a Court order allowing her access their house and get her clothing? Might she want to communicate to her sad sack husband and see if they could get past her fuck up? She never calls her friend? The entire ending felt rushed. What there was of the story was fairly entertaining, ruined by the train wreck ending.

I realize it's needed for the story, but they offer to return her to shore and she doesn't accept? "Making it up" to someone usually means giving UP something, not GETTING something!

I don't care how many "powerful" people they know, powerful people are going to want to distance themselves from that video. NOBODY is going to want anything to do with the Dolents.

She recorded that message as some sort of a joke, not thinking that Dave would ever see it? Talk about brain-dead wives!

The WORST they did was fuck her on their late mother's bed on the boat that their father kitted out for his wife?

She went back on a boat with them? AFTER they had further abused her? Does she even know about the video they sent Dave?

I know that they are self-centered idiots, but even if they weren't using Dolent II, they weren't short of money, why not have routine maintenance done on it?

Sorry, only fair.

Listen here you cucky fags . This is how a story works . I enjoyed every word . Full on 5 stars pal .you Sir get no condom to eat.

Enjoyable tongue in cheek entertainment with come uppance dished out appropriately. 5*.

. . . good actually. Disappointing, disjointed, lousy writing. Seemed as if the author just wanted to write something very quickly to join the crowd. Not a lot of thought went into this piece of garbage. Sorry. Didn't deserve more that 2* at best.

Well, more of a chortle, really. It was moderately amusing.

and a full refund will be sent to you.

Too goofy. You are better than this

This is the laziest writing at an event like this. Usually, an experienced writer will include every emotional moment or confrontation in an "event" story. This guy left it all out.

Enough, this was just embarrassing 😞.

AMerryman

This felt mechanical and drab, not your usual fare.

I liked it! Amy

gave it a 5, that is a 1st from you. you normally kill the husband off.

You call this a story,a two page short,full of it.

What exactly have you written to bitch about any story on here. Hell you can't even lave a name and email so we can all write and tell you to GO FUCK YOURSELF you fucking fag!! We all know your wife fucked 100 men and then told you on her death bed. I think it drove you creasy with hate. To bad you drank all that cum over the years!!.

Unfortunately went downhill rapidly. Ending felt extremely rushed. And seriously, the father never checked on his author? The moronic wife gets on another boat with the men that beat her and destroyed her marriage? Is anyone actually that epically stupid? Oh, wait....never mind. The pissed off husband doesn't sue the publishing house and/or the estates for the wrongful death/murder?

What was that?

Ok, written by a good writer

and backed up by another good (great?) writer (Huedogg2).

My respect to those two guys demands I keep my mouth shut, lol.

No rating from me.

but not much.

this might purposefully be the kind of story where author expects the reader to fill in the gaps, and connect the dots.

And why not? Even when that ISN'T the author's intention, someone who has been around as long and is as familiar with the LW audience as Matt is, knows that plenty of readers will do that ANYWAY. (ex. some stories say that she never cheats again, but readers fire away in comments that she can will and does, but narrator is just too testosterone challenged to notice)

But as for this story, I wonder if you also expected the early comments of disappointment, so that you could bring in a real shockeroo of a second chapter that tells THE REAL STORY.

Here is what my thoughts were:

Dave and Ms. St. Ives have been an item for awhile, because wifey is just too stupid and careless. She pretends to be her friend, but has probably been fucking her husband the whole time. Why else would she turncoat SO FAST? Sure, she is working so hard on her law career that she doesn't have time for a "normal" relationship, and besides, making her "friend" a cuckquean is more fun than the usual dating game. So she researches deep pockets in the area, finds a mark likely to settle easy and quick and begins to plot out the unsuspecting wife's demise. Sure she had to help her get a book deal, but wifey (sorry, already forgot her name) thinks she is shitting in tall clover, and is perfectly vulnerable for the boat cruise seduction. Meanwhile, rich brat Dolent boys play their part to the hilt, their previous escapades probably not as big a secret as they thought. Wifey gets delusional while dosed on coke and cock, and with a little weather forecasting research begin to voyage off into the path of a storm. So now, Dave and Lawyer chick get to live happily ever after, both a lot richer, with even more money made for the law firm she is a partner in.

Wonder if I'm close?

But ACTUALLY my best guess is that this really is a one off, and Matt just wanted use the word hubris as a story title.

Obviously, I had fun with this, so your efforts were worth it. Thanks so much!

Entertaining story without much substance. I’ve enjoyed your work but this doesn’t rise to your normal quality. Thanks for the effort but, to be fair, I could only give it two stars.

"My deepest apologies to Matt

I am sooo sorry that this got posted late. Randi is a great stupid and did not notice. Very sorry and a very good story."

@BlackRandl1958, you think this is a good story? No wonder you need 5 editors and needing 5 editors for your own work means you shouldn't EDIT for others as I have seen many other writers thank you for. This was full of errors, I get this is a free site, but fuck it was unreadable. This is by far the worst I have ever seen from MattBlack.

Too many holes ( no pun intended).

The story started off ok but after awhile it read like an outline and there was a rush to the final period.

...I’m pretty sure the Dolent boyz would have suffered more consequences over the Australian couple than was reported, and I highly doubt they’d have been allowed on the family showpiece yacht, their tendencies as shown in their keeping of their little boat being what they were. I’m sure their general demeanor would likely have assured their ban from any family proprieties.

They behaved and even talked like rampant 17 year olds.

How they lured Mrs Ima-writer-and Your-something-beneath-my-feet onto that boat is beyond reconning. As you made no attempt to explain the many, many vagaries in the progress of the story, I can’t say much of a positive note about it.

I guess you were in a hurry and had issues....

Sorry.

I usually like your work but as others have said before it seemed hurried. You mentioned you've not been in the best of health so I will not be too harsh in my summation.

This was poor and should never have been submitted. And if Blackrandi was your editor she should be ashamed of herself for not rejecting this sorry tale from the outset.

That was a total burn. No survivors. Perfectly ended. Not your usual, but a good quick read.

Just stop writing

Now here is a suggestion, Harry, why don't you START writing?

You know every mistake that other writers make, and you tell them, again, and again and again.

But you have a canon of works on Literotica that is precisely: Nothing. Akukho, None, Brak, Aucun, Dim, Neniu, niemand, Chan eil gin, Kore, Hi, Gjin, Keiner.

Or to put it another way, a nothing burger.

Twelve years, Harry.

Time to man up. Harry and write that story.

Or are you worried that people might rip it to shreds?

dammit it deserved to be much much longer. A great betrayal with some really nasty characters opens the door for a classic dark story. About 10 lit pages please or 3 long chapters.

Exceptional story thankyou.

Chur bro awesome story

MattblackUK really wrote something thid reasonable and good? Spot on, mate!

Their father knew about the Australian guy and hadn't cut them off and/or put them on a short leash?

Karen was weak and the naughty boys were evil.

They got what they deserved.

I gave the story five stars.

Billy Lines

her life insurance, plus you don't have to pay for a funeral.....its a win-win

Don’t have to pay for a divorce either,

Dropping her off in a 'safe house"? Then all of a sudden she goes back on board... Too rushed. Too much of the story missing. No arguments/negotiations/ explanations etc.. only a 4 this time.. I would give it a three but started out good.

That was a witty and apt answer.

The burial at sea line was with a five on its own.

Poetic justice 💀☠

stupid trash except burial at sea

I hope that Randi didn't edit this, because it needs editing badly. Multiple speakers in a paragraph, just a mess.

Fuck Karen, burial at sea with her naughty boys is just fitting!!

I really couldn't get into this story, I think because there was so little depth in any of the characters. The focus was all on the narrative which good as it was couldn't carry the story alone

Load of crap.

Nice black comedy. Some comments complain of lack of character development. My reaction is that in most of the loving wives stories, even if they sort of try to set up characters, the cheating wives in particular are just narrative paper cutouts with no real coherent characters, just setups for being morally disapproved of and scorned by the reader, and the husbands are paper cutouts of virtuous, faithful deserving males. I think its rather nice if a story doesn't bother to pretend at "character" sometimes.

It would make for easier reading if this author used quotation marks correctly.