All Comments on 'Humanity 2.0, Year 029, Day 039'

The earlier chapters were very well edited. This one and the next one have small errors - either words that are missing spaces, one with a semicolon followed by an apostrophe. Small things, but here is an example, from page 2 of this chapter, when Ben is impregnating Nadine:

"It kept pumping, hard, as if my body knew this moment was special and this was the time to [?] every last drop of semen it had."

I believe there is a word missing here.

More, though, there is a major continuity error in this chapter. After getting pregnant, Nadine falls asleep, and ... "Rain told me she'd put a blanket on Nadine and was letting her mother sleep." Yet in the next paragraph, Nadine is at dinner, talking to Nina. Yet again, Nadine wakes up and joins them at dinner? (It seems to be a consistent racial trait that the women fall asleep after sex involving getting pregnant. Just an observation.)

Something to think about, too. You can argue that this isn't the case with your new species. However, the longer a species lives, the longer the time it takes for it to reach sexual maturity. If the new lifespan is to be five or six centuries, I would expect thirty to fifty years before the children reach sexual maturity. If they will live a thousand years, then a century before sexual maturity would be within reason.

You've implied that down the road, Ben and Nadine dissolve their relationship, and not necessarily in a friendly way. On the other hand, the story feels like it's winding down. All in all a very good read. Thanks for sharing!

Just because they are living much longer doesn't mean they need take longer to reach maturity, including sexual maturity. They can still mature like previously, but after reaching maturity they no longer age, whatever cuts off our growth could also cut off aging.

If you want a story where extended lifespans mean extended maturation, write one, but don't impose your judgment on others.