I Am Life

I take a deep breath and shake my head. But then the voice reminds me.

Only truth.

"I'm ugly and I'm lazy." I'm almost pleading with him to see me as I really am. Tears start to swell in my eyes.

He takes a deep breath and squeezes my hips. "You go on your run every morning."

"So?"

"I can't believe it sometimes. Like clockwork. You never miss a day. And when you return, you're exhausted. You actually...run."

Tears are falling down my cheeks. I tighten my grip on his shoulders.

"My life...I'm such a mess," he admits. "I do the bare minimum to get by and I hate it but I don't know how to change it. I wish I did at least one thing everyday that I didn't have to. One thing that I love. But the truth is, I don't even know what that is."

I can no longer hold back the tears. Our eyes are locked on each other.

He says, "I wish...I wish I was a better person. I wish...I wish I was more like you."

I can't help it anymore and I lean in and kiss him, my tears spreading across his face as our heads move in our shared passion. I feel his tongue on mine and finally our bodies touch. The heat from his hard cock pushes against my stomach. I feel his hands grip my butt and squeeze tightly, revealing his strength to me. I unbend my legs so that my feet aren't in the way of his hands on my butt and I realize for the first time that the two of us are not on the ground. Taking deep breaths of passion, I glance down to see the two of us are hovering, the cyclone of wind and leaves holding us up. He notices it as well and straightens his legs out. The wind begins to lower us slowly. Troy lands on his feet, but mine are still slightly bent, so I'm rested on my knees. My eyes stay on his as I'm lowered but when I feel the ground on my knees, I look in front of me. His cock is right there, pointed at me. Choosing me. I feel his hand pet my head and without thinking, I open my mouth and take his manhood inside me. The feeling of his soft mushroom head fills my mouth and I wrap one hand around his shaft and the other to cup his balls. I slowly start to massage his shaft with my mouth, moving my tongue along its underside as I do.

Troy throws his head back and moans. I feel him lean back, so much so that I think he's about to fall over. His toes lift off the ground but his heels stay planted. My body moves with his and we're suspended over the ground at a slight angle. I push further down on his cock until I feel it enter my throat. I want to feel all of him. When I feel the gagging reflex begin, I pull him out of me and look up as I stroke his cock.

"How..." He's pants. "How could you ever doubt yourself? You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen."

His words send a shiver through me and I respond by opening my mouth and taking him inside of me again. I bob my head faster, wanting to make him feel the pleasure his words just gave me. I now no longer need my hand on his shaft as my mouth has replaced it. I grab a hold of his thighs and jerk his manhood with my mouth, keeping my eyes up on him as I do. Both of his hands grip my head and I feel a slight sting as he grips my hair and pulls. My mouth is pushed down until I feel his balls on my chin, something I've never felt before. I can almost feel his cock in every part of my body. I moan, barely audible since my throat is filled with his cock. I finally jerk my head up and gasp for air, strings of saliva falling onto his body. I look up at him with a mixture of vulnerability and desperation. I want him.

I feel my body move as if I'm an acrobat flying through the air in slow motion. My body twists around, as does his. I feel myself upside down, my hair reaching for the forrest floor. His cock is still in front of me but now I feel his tongue between my legs. I wrap my arms around his hips and I spread my thighs as wide as I can, inviting him into my body. Even his tongue feels strong as it starts to lick my clit up and down. I kiss his body where his pelvis and his cock meet and push his shaft onto his body, revealing his balls. I start to run my tongue up and down and then kiss each of them. This glorious manhood that I've fantasized about for so long. In turn he moves his head up and down, flicking my clit with his tongue and now pushes one finger inside my pussy. I push my hips into his face and throw my head back, which means I'm looking directly at the ground. This feeling of weightlessness as we hover over the ground makes me feel disoriented. We're flying but nothing is holding us up, except for the swirling of wind and leaves that encircle us. My stomach muscles tighten and I begin to feel it. It starts deep within me but with each penetration of his fingers and flicking of his tongue, it comes closer and closer to the surface. I don't want to finish like this. I want to feel him inside me.

As if in response to my thought, our bodies begin to move again. Troy is slowly lowered back to the ground, standing straight up. My body is twisted around until I'm laying flat on the ground. But then I realize I'm not on the ground, I'm still hovering. It's as if I'm laying on a table that isn't there. My soaking wet slit is inches from his throbbing cock. The wind has laid me level with his cock. He realizes our position before I do and responds. He reaches out for my knees and pulls me into him. My pussy is so wet he slides right in. My body ignites with pleasure and fire. I wrap my legs around him and he starts to thrust his hips into me. I clutch my hands around his arms. This feeling of weightlessness is enthralling but I can't help but feel like I'm going to fall. It makes me clutch onto him tighter. My body bounces off of him like I too am weightless. I see a deep-seated frustration pouring out of him as he looses himself with each invasion of my body. His cock pulses inside of me as a gush of pleasure falls out of me with each penetration.

"Fuck," he breaths out. His entire body feels tense. My head leans back, but with nothing to rest on, it falls pointing to the ground. I open my eyes and see the forrest upside down, my field of vision shaking with each thrust into my body. I've never felt so wholly taken before. In this moment I am his object of pleasure and I'm surprised at home fulfilled it makes me feel. Every nerve in my body is ignited. I feel his cock in parts of my body I didn't know it was even possible. I lift my head back up and see him grit his teeth. He's close. He looks down at me and he must be able to see the fear in my eyes at the possibility of him filling me with his seed.

"Where?" He grunts.

I don't respond. I don't have to. The voice knows. Both our bodies begin to move, but this time quickly. We're both lifted off the ground and twisted until we're both laying on our side suspended in the air. His cock right in front of my face as is my pussy right in front of his. I open my mouth and swallow his cock. It tastes of my own juices, as if his cock now belongs to me. I hear him release a deep growl as he buries his face into my pussy. His tongue enters me and I feel the first eruption of his seed down my throat. The warm sticky prize of his passion sends me into euphoria and my juices erupt out of me in an orgasm that cleanses my body of tension. We both cum into each other for what feels like an eternity. I finally have to pull my head away for air. Some drops of his cum fall out of me and onto my cheek since I'm suspended sideways. He has two last spurts of pleasure that land across my face and I almost giggle at the feeling of it. Then I realize my legs have been clamped around his head during my entire orgasm and I quickly release him. He pulls his head back, gasping for air. I crane my neck to look at him and smile as much as I can while still holing his cum in my mouth. He looks at me and we both laugh, a few spirts of his cum escaping my lips. I take a deep breath in and swallow his seed as our bodies are gently lowered to rest on the ground.

We both lay there as we are. His cock resting on my cheek, his head resting on my thigh. His face is so close to my pussy that I can feel his breath on the slick surface of my lips. I give his half hard cock a kiss and it twitches. I feel a few stray drops of cum fall out of his tip and onto the back of my jaw. Our bodies rest for a moment, both of us exhausted from our passion.

The two of you are glorious because of your imperfections. Never judge your imperfections as mistakes. They are gifts. Life does not make mistakes. I should know. I am life.

And with that, the wind comes to an abrupt stop. The leaves fall to the ground and suddenly the forrest is still once again. Troy and I sit up and look around, confirming we are still alone. We finally look at each other. Both of us having gone through something we can not explain. We kiss, a final sealing of the understanding between us.

I am his and he is mine.

**********************************************************************************************

The walk home was completely unexpected. A part of me thought there's no way the two of us won't feel awkward once the adrenaline dies down. That couldn't be further from the truth. After getting dressed, he held his hand out for mine. The simplest of gestures but after everything we had just gone through, the casualness of the offer is what sealed our bond. We were meant for each other. We spoke like the best of friends the entire way back. An old couple of sorts. When we finally returned to our driveways, he looked down and smiled.

"Your watch," he pointed out. I glance down and see my workout is still being tracked. "I ruined your time," he jokes.

I lean up and give him a kiss and whisper in his ear, "imagine I said something cheesy in response."

He laughs and gives me a hug.

"So, dinner tonight?" He asks.

I'm about say yes but then a thought occurs to me. "Actually, tonight I'm busy."

He frowns, unsure of how to take that.

I give him a kiss. "Something I need to fix tonight. But tomorrow night, I expect something very fancy. I'm talking something like we won't be able to afford a mortgage on a house because of how much you spent, type of fancy."

"Oh!" He says, raising his eyebrows. "Are we shopping for a house together now?"

I look down embarrassed, then back up at him. "You're right. Maybe Applebees will be just fine tomorrow night."

He laughs. "Imagine I said something really cool."

I chuckle. This is going to be fun.

"How about," he begins, a little hesitant. "I join you for your run tomorrow morning? If it's okay. I know some people prefer to alone so-" He starts to ramble.

I put my finger on his lips and smile. "I'd love it. Eight a.m. Not a minute late or I leave without you."

He gives me a big hug and one last kiss.

"I'll see you tomorrow." He turns and heads for his front door.

I watch him for a moment. He has a great ass, I think. Then I laugh at how corny I am sometimes. But for real, I think. He does. I shake my head and turn towards my front door. I see the a curtain quickly shut. I look at it strangely as I walk towards my door. When I open it, my mom comes out of the kitchen. She's looking at me strangely.

"Well he's certainly a fine looking man," she says with a smile.

I roll my eyes. "Were you spying on me, mom?" I tease her as I walk past.

"No," I hear her retort, an air of laughter in her voice.

I get to the base of the steps but instead of turning to go up, I turn the other way and walk into my dad's office. He looks up at me, expressionless.

"Hey dad, could I have that application you were telling me about? The one for that school your friend works at?"

Immediately his face lights up in confused joy. "Yeah," he says overly eager. He opens up a couple drawers of his desk, rifling through them. He finds an envelope and holds it out to me.

"What are you thinking?" He asks.

I take the envelope and smile at him. "I'm thinking...maybe it's worth applying just so I can tell them in my essay how wrong they are on so many subjects." I give him a sarcastic look.

He actually laughs and says, "Give 'em hell."

Surprised, I nod. "Okay." I turn to go, hearing a satisfied sigh behind me.

I go up to my room and close the door. I open my laptop and sit at my desk. I open the envelope and page through it until I find the instructions for the personal statement. I know this application well. This is THE application. The one who's personal statement stumped me so many times. I lay the instructions on the desk and open up Word on my laptop. Glancing down at the paper, I see the simple question.

In a thousand words or less, answer the question: Who am I?

I stare at the cursor on my laptop as it blinks back at me. The blank page taunting me as it always has in the past. I think about what I want to say.

Who am I? The question is flawed. It implies a person can only be one thing. I am many things. I am confident, yet unsure. I am brave, yet scared. I am intelligent, yet uninformed. I am a multitude of things all at once. In a world made to simplify the complex down to a thousand words or less, I am undefinable. I am something different at any given time. I am something different to every single person. I may be messy at times, but there is always beauty to be seen amongst my madness. I might not always make sense, but I will always move forward in search of a greater truth. The only thing I can think of to explain who I am is...

A thought occurs to me. I smile as my fingers touch the keyboard.

I begin to type.

I am life.