I Have Always Been Gay Pt. 04

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Final realization of his true self.
2.2k words
4.71
2.6k
8

Part 4 of the 4 part series

Updated 07/05/2023
Created 05/03/2023
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I have always been Gay (part 4)

My desire for sex with other men was getting out of control and I knew it. Robert had been the first of a long line of encounters with each encounter a bit more exotic and reckless than the previous encounter. All of this was threatening to overwhelm me until one day when awoke in a strange bed, with some guy I couldn't recall meeting. I dressed quietly and headed home. Fortunately it wasn't a week day or the consequences might have been worse. When I finally got home, I knew I had to take stock in where I was in my life and where I was going. Something was happening to me and I wasn't sure where it was taking me.

The next few weeks more changes came. I found myself being interested in women's lingerie. The feelings those thoughts awakened in me were intoxicating. I found myself buying women's underwear and began wearing it under my normal clothes. After a short period of time, I no longer even kept my old briefs. I replaced them all with panties. I would wear bras when I could, though hiding them was more difficult. Something else had changed as well. I had started meeting men while wearing my new clothes. Their response was surprising as I found this turned many of them on. It became routine for me to leave work, go home and dress in my favorite sexy underwear and look for men.

Then early one morning, I was awakened from my slumber by the feel of hand as it gently caressed my ass. The hand slid across the satiny material of the panties I had dawned before dozing off. I stirred with the hands movements and as it continued to probe, the attention had not only roused me from my slumber, but was arousing me as well. I soon began moaning and wiggling my ass against the roving hand. I felt the fingers slipping between my legs then pressing upward toward my recently filled little hole. I spread my legs slightly to allow the hand easier access and was rewarded with a finger pressing the satiny material against my now eager hole.

I felt him stir now, adjusting his position to move closer to me. I felt his erect cock as it brushed against my back. The hand now slipped out from between my legs and I felt it slid inside my panties, working its way back down. The finger was no longer obstructed by the material of my panties and the finger worked its way into easily into my ass. Slowly, with increased pressure, the finger slid deeper into me, my hole was still wet from our earlier activity. The finger began slowly moving in and out of me, eliciting more moans as I began getting more and more turned on.

I felt lips on the back of my neck, then the finger withdrawing. The hand now pushed my panties down and the cock that had been pressed against my back earlier, was pushing between my cheeks, seeking my wet wanton little hole. The head found its mark, pressing harder, the head slipped easily inside. I felt his body shift, then with a single thrust, the cock slid all the way in, filling me completely. I let out a groan as the hard cock thrust into me and was rewarded as it began sliding in and out of me.

The cock that was currently fulfilling my need to be fucked was my newest conquest. It had started in a local bar when the owner of the cock had visited the men's room and noted my attention to his member as he relieved himself. He'd asked a simple and direct question, whether I liked what I saw, the rest faded to memory as his thrusts began quickening. I knew he'd soon shoot another load into me, his fifth of the evening and soon after I felt him grip my hips and thrust deep and hard. His cum shot deep inside me, its warmth filling me and driving my desires further. His hot cum exploded into me and his frantic thrusts brought about my own orgasm.

This had been my sixth sexual encounter in as many weeks, each with some stranger from a local bar or club. All of them ending with my spending the night in bed, a receptacle for loads of cum. It seems degrading, but it was what I craved. I couldn't control myself. There was this need to be a fuck toy for any guy with a hard dick. To feel his cock sliding in and out of me until his cock explodes filling me with his cum. I had become insatiable, a cock whore, willing to do anything if a man would fuck me.

This had all started when I'd met a man at a local bar. We'd hit it off right away and I ended up giving him head in the john. As I sucked his cock, he told me how much he enjoyed it but what he really wanted was a good fuck. I let him take me there at the bar. He was quickly inside me, thrusting hard and fast. This in prompt to fuck was awakening something in me. Each thrust felt wonderful and soon my body was tingling all over. When his pace quickened and I felt the first deep thrust as his cock filled me with cum, I climaxed. Not just any climax, but the most intense climax I had ever had. We stood there leaning against the wall, completely spent. I heard his breath in my ear, rasping from his efforts. He said something along the lines of "Wow," but all I could think was," Oh my God! " His cock began to soften and I felt a deep sense of loss as his cock slid out of me. I was not yet ready to end this session, so when he finished and straightening up, he asked me to come back to his place. It was if I could say the words fast enough. I agreed, turning to him, standing on my toes, I kissed him as gave his crotch a gentle squeeze.

I rode with him, which was totally out of character for one of my adventures. I had this overwhelming need to not let him out of my sight. It was if I let him get away, I might never feel that incredible orgasm again and tonight I wanted more. On the way to his place, I slid next to him and began massaging his crotch, I felt his response as his wonderful cock began to stiffen. I soon had released it out, my lips gripping it as I took him down my throat. He began moaning and I knew he would soon be filling my mouth. I did want to taste his cum, but that wasn't what was driving me now, so I quickly released him. He groaned, asking me not to stop and I simply smiled back at him, telling him that was just a taste of what awaited him we when got to his place.

We finally arrived at his apartment and before he could get out of the car, I was urging him to take in the car before we went inside. He laughed telling me he had no idea I was a nymphomaniac. His laugh turned to an evil grin as he told me now it was his turn to make me wait. I pouted and informed him that it would be me who had the last laugh and we quickly went up to his apartment. No sooner than he had closed and lock his door and I was on him. Kissing him and groping for that incredible cock. He began laughing again and telling me I could at least wait until we got to the sofa.

I entered his living room and sat down. How offered to fix me a drink and I quickly informed him that right now the only drink I wanted from him was already present all I need do was work on the dispenser. Again he laughed and sat down beside me. In what seemed like seconds, his cock was in my mouth again and I was working him up to another climax. Just as I felt his hip begin thrusting his cock deeper into my throat, I pulled back and told him I wanted him inside me. Like the scene from movie, our clothes were off. I was on my back, my legs in the air, his cock buried inside me. The in prompt to blow job had done it's magic, as he was grunting and thrust hard and fast. He would soon be filling me with hot cum.

His thrusts intensified and as his first load exploded into me, my body was responding again with that wonderful tingling. His cock was bringing me to climax again, each thrust raising my level of pleasure to new heights. I lay gasping, my mind racing, what was happening. I'd had sex with men before, but something in me had changed. I was a little scary, but the warm feeling of complete satisfaction I was feeling way laid any fears. I had discovered something wonderful and I knew I would not be able to get enough. The rest if the night had been pretty much the same, each time we fucked, I would climax when he did.

That night had changed everything for me. Previous adventures had ended up with my partners climax and my going home to pleasure myself as I recalled my activities. That night had been different when I had finally gotten home I was faced with an overwhelming sense of loss. No matter how hard I tried, I could not bring myself to orgasm, yet I knew, if I had a man with me, I would be spouting like a fountain as his cock filled me. I even tried using one of my many toys, but the feeling wasn't the same, all I did was make myself even hornier.

So the last few weeks had been one encounter after another. Different men, different cocks, and each time the tingle returned ending in an intense climax as each man exploded into me. I was concerned about this new aspect of my life, but the memory of those intense orgasms couldn't be denied. I wanted them, needed them, and this last encounter had been better than all the others. This man had crawled into my bed and I had gone to sleep in his arms. His early morning activities had resulted in not just my orgasm but the most intense orgasm I'd had ever had before.

Sometime later, after he'd showered, dressed and left, I lay thinking about what was happening to me. I had always enjoyed sex. Sex with women to begin with and now sex with men, but something else had happened to me. Something unexpected had changed in me when I began having sex with men. As I laid there thinking, I realized that the changes weren't something bad, it was if I had found something I lost. Something I had missed before and now that I had found it, it felt right and wonderful. What had happened with my new sexual experiences, what had they changed in me, then it came to me. It hadn't changed anything. Those experiences had awakened my true feelings. I had found by accident what truly made me feel good, what felt right, and God knows, what truly satisfied me.

I lay there with my thoughts, slowly coming to a new realization about myself, when I suddenly became aware of my surroundings. I was laying on my bed, the sheets wet beneath me, wet with not only the result of his climaxes, but my own as well. I could smell his scent, the scent of his cum and the scent of my own. The odors combining in my nostrils to awaken my sexual desires. My cock began to respond, growing and stiffening. Unlike before, this time I closed my eyes and remembered how he had made love to me. The feel of his lips on mine as his hands explored my body. I remembered the feeling of his cock as he entered me. How it filled me and good I had felt when he was fully inside of me.

I remembered his touch as he thrust his throbbing member into me, his hands finding my nipples and gently rolling them between his fingers. The tingling sensation that his movements awakened in me. I became aware that I was moaning, my hips moving in time to the memories. My cock was rigid and as worked my hips I could feel the tingling begin. I sank deeper into the memories of the night before. The thrust of his thick cock, his rasping breath in my ear as he fucked me from behind. Then I remembered the feeling his cock cumming inside of me, the hot liquid spreading it's warmth inside of me and I found myself cumming. My cock exploding spewing cum across my stomach and chest. I lay gasping and as my mind cleared I understood what was happening. What I had never been willing to admit before. I loved men, wanted men, the attention of a man, released the inner me. It allowed me to feel complete. I realized at that moment, I was gay, not only that, but that I had always been gay.

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cdCindy1cdCindy17 months ago

FANTASTIC STORY !!!! 5 STARS FOR SURE.

I love this series of stories as it really hit home with me, especially the beginning of this last chapter when you start wearing panties and bras. I have over the past 3 years become a crossdresser and often wear women's clothes when I'm with men. Not always - some men just want me to be a naked man. So, I am both a CD and a secretly gay man.

Your ending is so perfect I have to repeat it here to emphasize the that what you are saying applies 100% to me.

" I understood what was happening. What I had never been willing to admit before. I loved men, wanted men, the attention of a man, released the inner me. It allowed me to feel complete. I realized at that moment, I was gay, not only that, but that I had always been gay."

That is me. I AM GAY. I AM GAY. I AM GAY. YES YES YES.

Thank you for these stories. Please tell more like this and let all of us know if you have been able to find that man for you to spend the rest of your life with - to be your husband. That is something I'm looking for too.

ChloecrossedChloecrossed9 months ago

God I love men, can’t believe I waited so long until I realised, but after my first time I felt ( and feel) complete. It just feels so natural making love with my man. Xxxx

Clueless4uClueless4u9 months agoAuthor

It has made life easier, simplier anyway. It has given me some new challenges but I don't allow challenges to rule my life. I'm living a more fulfilling life and enjoting it more too!

MarcLuciFerMarcLuciFer9 months ago

I wish this story had been around a couple hundred years ago when I was struggling with who I really was. I think it would have made my life a lot simpler. But yeah, definitely been there, done that. Thanks for sharing this one.

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