I Love my Son More than I Should

Then, as if she was horny and, in the mood, to expand on all that she'd do if Kyle was her son, Marsha added sexual details.

"If Kyle was my son, I'd flash him my panties in up-skirt peaks and my deep line of sexy cleavage in down-blouse views. I'd flash him my naked pussy in up-nightgown peaks and my naked tits in down-nightgown views. I'd kiss him, French kiss him, while allowing him to touch me and feel me through my clothes. I'd make out with him. I'd allow him to finger me, masturbate me, eat me, make love to me, and fuck me," said Marsha with a sexy laugh of all that she'd do with Kyle if he was her son.

A bad, sexual influence on Ann, Marsha encouraged her and told her that there was nothing wrong with flashing her son and sexually seducing him. There was a long pause in their conversation as if Ann was thinking about flashing Kyle her panties, her cleavage, her naked pussy, and her naked tits. Yet, instead of voicing what she was going to do, she continued to remain silent as if she was thinking about Kyle having sex with her.

No secret there, every time she thought of Kyle, she became horny. Every time she thought of her son, she thought of having sex with him and him having sex with her. As much as she'd love him to cum in her pussy, she'd love him to cum in her mouth and all over her face, too.

"If he was my son, after dinner and after a few drinks, while watching a movie, I'd stroke him, suck him, and fuck him," encouraged Marsha and daring Ann to have sex with her son.

Yet, even though she thought about having sex with her son, even though she thought of masturbating him and him masturbating her, eating her, making love to her, and fucking her, she'd never have sex with her son. She couldn't. She just wouldn't.

# # #

"Already going too far in our mother and son relationship by encouraging him to sexually seduce me, it's my fault that I turned our relationship from a loving family one to a romantic, sexual one," said Ann. "To be honest, I'd not only allow him to kiss me but also, I'd allow him to French kiss me. I'd not only allow him to part my lips with his tongue but also not stopping him from making out with me, I returned his French kiss with my deep, wet kiss," she said while imagining her son French kissing her.

She paused again as if imagining Kyle kissing her, French kissing her.

"With me feeling like such a slut and not caring, I'd allow him to make out with me while touching me and feeling me everywhere that a son should never touch and feel his mother through her clothes," she said feeling her breasts through her clothes as if her hand were her son's hand.

She lifted her short skirt and stuck her hand between her legs. Tracing her pussy slit with her finger, she fingered her pussy through her panties. Then, pushing her panties aside, she inserted her manicured index finger in her pussy.

She masturbated herself while talking to her friend on the phone. Something that a man would do, not missing a step in her phone conversation, she fingerfucked her pussy while rubbing her clit. While imagining having sex with her son, something she'd never confess to anyone else, she continued her incestuous, sexual confession to her friend, Marsha.

# # #

"Oh, my God, ready to submit to him, if ever he touched me in a sexually forbidden way, he'd sexually arouse me with his touches and his kisses. He'd make me so horny, horny enough to want more, and to make me want to fuck him," she said while playing through her mind all that she imagined happening.

Clearly sexual aroused, she was breathless on the phone talking to her friend.

"If him kissing me, French kissing me, making out with me and feeling me through my clothes wasn't enough, I'd allowed my son to undress me. I'd allowed him to ever so slowly strip me naked. Shocking even myself, I'd allowed him to not only see my naked body but also touch and feel my naked body," said Ann while touching and feeling herself through her clothes again.

She continued feeling and fondling her big breasts through her blouse while fingering her erect nipples through her bra.

"If only he'd make the first move, I'd allow him to touch, feel, and fondle my naked breasts while pulling, turning, and twisting my erect nipples. I'd allow him to rub my clit while fingerfucking my pussy. I'd allow my son to masturbate me, his mother," she confessed. "I'd allow him to watch me and hear me cum."

Then, having second thoughts, denying her sexual feelings for her son, she went from one extreme to the other extreme.

"Yet, I'm such a dirty whore. I'm a shameless disgrace. How dare I want to have sex with my son? What's wrong with me to want my son to not only see me naked, touch and feel my naked body but also to masturbate me," said Ann. "I'm such an incestuous slut."

# # #

Oh, the shame of wanting to have incestuous sex with my son, how can I do that? Should we decide to have sex, such an emotionally traumatic thing to do, remembering every day, multiple times a day, every touch and every feel, how can I live with that? How dare I even think of being such an incestuous whore? What's wrong with me for having the forbidden thoughts of taking sexual advantage of my adult son," she asked her mostly rhetorical questions of herself and no one else?

Berating herself, with her having no other sounding board other than talking to her friend, Marsha, clearly, Ann was feeling guilty about her forbidden, sexual thoughts of having sex with Kyle.

"This is my son and not some man that I picked up at a bar, allowed him to take me home, and invited him inside to fuck me. Should he ever marry, how would I face his wife, his mother-in-law, and my grandchildren? I'd be embarrassed for them to find out that I sucked my son and fucked my son. I'd be embarrassed for them to know that I allowed him to cum in my mouth and in my pussy," she said.

She paused to remember her history of sexual abuse. Never just one abuser, she had eight abusers. Her piano teacher, her uncle, her cousin, her four, much older brothers, and her violently abusive, ex-husband.

Not caring that she was an 18-year-old virgin, they all raped her. They all striped her naked. They all forced her to stroke them, suck them, and fuck them.

"In hindsight, thinking about my checkered past, maybe, it's all not my fault," she said to Marsha while pausing to remember what sexually happened to her so very long ago. "Because I was sexually abused, too, sometimes difficult to differentiate one from the other, maybe I'm the victim and not the abuser. Perhaps, with me unable to say no, I'm an innocent pawn in my son's sexual seduction of me.

Ann paused to remember all the men who wouldn't take no for an answer. Ripping off her clothes, she paused to remember all the men who stripped her naked. She paused to remember all the men who mounted her and/or took her from behind. She paused to remember all the men who raped her. She paused to remember all the men who forced their erect pricks in her hand, in her mouth, and in her pussy. Painful to remember, she paused to remember all the men who forced her to stroke their cocks, suck their cocks, and fuck their cocks.

"Perhaps, him having sex with me is just a continuation of my sexual, abuse cycle. Taken advantage of no less than eight times by eight different men, continuing in my role as a victim, maybe, my son is the abuser and I'm his victim. Maybe, with me always so nice and vulnerable, maybe I'm doomed to always be the victim."

Ann thought more about her being the victim rather than her being the abuser.

"Yet, I wonder what's wrong with him. When Kyle could have any girl that he sexually wanted, why would he want to have sex with his mother? Why would my 30-year-old son want to have sex with his 59-year-old mother? That makes no sense to me at all," said Ann. "Why wouldn't my son want to have sex with a woman his own age?"

She paused as if thinking of her son being a sexual abuser. She paused as if trying to answer her own rhetorical questions. After his father died, with her catering to him and spoiling him, it would make sense that she'd spawn another, sexual abuser.

"Yet, making no sense to me, why would my son want to strip me naked? Why would he want to make love to me and then fuck me? Why would he want to finger my pussy and lick my pussy? Why would he want me to stroke him, suck him, and cum in my mouth while blowing him? What's wrong with him to sexually seduce me? What's wrong with my son to want to have sex with his mother?"

# # #

I Love My Son More Than I Should the Ending

Something that goes without saying and something that was expected of me as a mother, I've always loved my son, Kyle, in the way that a mother should love her son. With that said and with him my only child, doting on him and coddling him, I admit that I spoiled him, especially after his father, my husband, died in a traffic accident. Unable to help myself, reminding me so much of him, he looked so very much like his father.

With his father's body buried in the ground, I allowed him to sleep in my bed since the time he turned 20-years-old and I was 49-years-old. Thinking that he'd behave himself and stay on his side of the bed, he didn't. I keenly remember him taking sexual advantage of me nearly every night while I was sleeping. Wishing he'd take sexual advantage of me while I was awake, he never did.

With me never wearing panties to bed, waiting until I was sleeping, he'd lift the back of my short nightgown over my naked ass. Then, spooning me, he'd grind his erect cock against my ass and against my pussy. With me as horny as I was sexually frustrated from not having had sex in a while, it didn't take long for me to be wet, soaking wet.

When he thought that I wouldn't awaken, taking sexual advantage of his mother's cunt, he slipped his prick inside of my warm, wet pussy. Instead of fucking me, he made love to me. Not wanting to awaken me, instead of humping fast and hard, he humped me slow and easy. He buried the full length of his 9" cock deep inside of me while fondling my breasts and fingering my nipples through my sheer nightgown.

Again, waiting until I was sleeping or, in my case, pretending to be asleep, he'd move up the bed until his cock was level with my mouth. Enticing me to part my lips and open my mouth, he'd slowly slide his erect cock along my red, full lips. Then, inserting himself inside my mouth, he'd force me to suck him. My son would force me to blow him.

Delicate with his humps, the last thing that he wanted to do was to awaken me. Taking him in my mouth, I pretended that I was sleeping while I licked his cock and sucked his prick. It didn't take him long to cum and when he did, he ejaculated his cum in my mouth. Destroying the evidence that he forced me to blow him, I swallowed his cum.

# # #

Without having all the rough edges, he looked like a younger version, albeit a kinder and sexier version of his father. He was a much better and gentler lover than my husband. It's like my son kept all the good qualities about my husband and got rid of the bad ones. Yet, what he had that my husband didn't have was a big cock. He was blessed with a full 9" appendage. I saw it in full bloom whenever I caught him masturbating and whenever he stuck that monster in my mouth while I was sleeping, or pretending to be asleep.

Carrying up his laundry and opening his bedroom door without knocking, while hoping to catch him masturbating and see his erect prick again, with his eyes closed and headphones on, I stayed to watch him cumming. With him not knowing that I was there watching him playing with himself, at the very least, seeing his erect prick and him cumming gave me more to masturbate over later. I only wished he was cumming on me and/or inside of me.

'Who knew my son is so well endowed? My God, Kyle has such a big cock,' I thought to myself while staring at his exposed prick longer than I should have stared as his mother. Never knowing that I preferred a man with a big prick, I loved my son enormous cock.

# # #

Yet, now that he's older, thirty-years-old, and still living at home, I look at him differently. I no longer look at him as I did when he was a boy. I look at him as if he's a man, my man. I look at him sexily. Sexually attracted to him, unashamed and unembarrassed to admit my sexual attraction to my son, I look at him more as a sexual partner and as a lover than as my son. Every time I see his erection bulging out his jeans, he makes my nipples hard and my pussy wet.

Unable to quell my incestuous thoughts and/or extinguish my sexual desires, so wrong for a mother to do, I go to bed dreaming of him naked and him having sex with me. Nonetheless, my second thoughts, I finally took Marsha's advice to have awake sex with my son. On the surface, you may think me an incestuous whore but there's more to my sexual attraction to my son than that.

I'm unashamed and unembarrassed that I dream of stroking my son's cock, sucking my son's cock, and fucking my son's cock. Yet, the bottom line, I love my son and would do anything for him, even have incestuous sex with him while I'm awake or while I'm sleeping. Something that I have no control over, I awaken horny for him and for the physical touch of him. If only he'd make the first move, I'd make all the rest of the sexual moves.

While waiting for him to make the first, sexual move, if he showed any sexual interest in me at all, I'd be all over him. I'd sexually seduce him. Something that I yearned to do since his father died years ago, I'd stroke him, suck him, make love to him, and fuck him. As if born again, I'd bathe myself in his cum. Yet, with him still sleeping in my bed, sleeping sex is better than no sex.

Sexually teasing him, yet, as far as I'm willing to go, I wear my sexiest nightgowns in front of him without having the modesty to wear a robe over them. Having tested it in my full-length mirror, I know that he can clearly see my naked ass, my naked tits, and even my naked pussy, and usually, that's enough for me. Again, while sexually teasing him as if I'm Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct, I flash him up-skirt peeks of my panties and down-blouse views of my long, sexy line of cleavage and my big, naked breasts.

While knowing that he's there watching me, and fingering the head of his growing erection through his pants or pajama bottoms, I pretend that I don't know he's there watching me dress and undress. Hoping that he'd step in my room and touch me and feel me, I routinely dress and undress in front of him with my bedroom door wide open. Giving him plenty of sexual fodder to see and to masturbate over, while hoping he'd see and regret all that he's missing, I wanted him to see me with my clothes. I wanted him to see me topless and naked.

Hoping that he'd take a peek, under the excuse that it was too hot and too steamy with the bathroom door closed, I leave the bathroom door open enough for him to see me showering and bathing naked. If he dared enter the bathroom while I was in the bathtub to ask if I wanted him to wash my back, I'd have him wash more than my back. I'd have him wash my dirty tits. I'd have him scrub my filthy pussy. I'd have him wash my naked, shapely ass. I'd have him wash me everywhere as I sucked his cock while sitting in the bathtub.

# # #

Later that night, before we retired for bed and had sleeping sex, while sitting together on the sofa and drinking wine, curious to see what he'd do, I leaned into his shoulder and cuddled with him while watching a movie. Pretending that I was inebriated after consuming two glasses of wine, I moved my hand to bulge of his pajama clad prick and left it there. Immediately, his cock throbbed and pulsated beneath the warmth of my motherly hand while continuing to grow significantly bigger and harder. Not taking very long, while hoping his cock would burst out of his pajama pee hole, he was getting quite the erection.

Hoping that he'd return the sexual favor of me touching him with him touching me, I hoped that he'd put his arm around me with his hand and fingers in contact with the side of my nightgown clad, naked breast. I so wanted him to touch, feel, and fondle my breasts through my nightgown. With me leaning forward to get my wine, I flashed him my naked tits down my opened nightgown top. Waiting for him to take me, I wished he'd stick his hand inside and pull, turn, and twist my nipples.

Not stopping there, masturbating me, I'd love him to suck my nipples while fingering my pussy and rubbing my clit. Not wanting to be too obvious in my wicked, sexual intentions, I covered my lap with a throw blanket. Only, when covering my lap with the throw blanket, I made sure that as I put the blanket across my lap that I raised the hem of my nightgown all the way to my waist. Then, when I got up to go in the kitchen or to the bathroom, I'd deliberately flash him my naked ass and my waxed, bald, naked pussy.

Hopefully, while cuddling beside me, he'd discover that my naked pussy was exposed when he put his hand on my upper thigh. Hoping he'd move his hand higher, my sexual fantasy coming true, I imagined him rubbing my clit while fingerfucking my pussy. I imagined him feeling and fondling my big breasts while pulling, turning, and twisting my nipples. I imagined myself cumming while screaming out his name.

'Kyle. Kyle. Don't stop. Mommy is cumming. Mommy is cumming. Rub my clit harder. Fingerfuck my pussy deeper. Squeeze my tits while fingering my nipples,' I imagine saying when he finally got around to masturbating me. 'I'm cumming, Kyle. I'm cumming.'

# # #

Only, with him thinking that I was drunk from drinking two glasses of wine, when he lifted the back of my nightgown to expose my naked as in bed, instead of gently making love to me, he fucked. He rammed his prick in my cunt. Humping me harder and humping me faster, Kyle was finally giving me what I wanted.

Taking me by taking what he wanted, he continued slamming his cock inside of me. Then, turning me around, he mounted me and made love to me while making out with me. Finally, he pushed on my shoulders for me to move down the bed. Then, sticking his prick in my mouth, he forced me to blow him. This time, holding my head with two hands, he humped my mouth and fucked my face.

# # #

Sometimes, when I'm really horny and/or sexually frustrated, in the same way that he's allowed me to catch him masturbating, I allowed him to catch me masturbating, too. I allowed him to watch me fondling my big, naked tits and finger my erect nipples. With my eyes closed and the hum of my vibrator masking whatever noises there are in the background, I pretended that I didn't hear him enter my bedroom without knocking and that I didn't know that he was in my bedroom while watching me masturbating myself.

The true incestuous whore that I am, I allowed him to hear me and watch me cum. Only, wanting so much, sexually more, he needed to make the first move. He needed to take the sexual control. He needed to sexually seduce his mother. He needed to strip off my nightgown and stick his erect cock in my mouth before sticking his stiff prick in my pussy.

Hoping to entice him to masturbate me, I decided to take my sexual teasing to an extreme. When I knew he was there in my bedroom watching me playing with myself and pleasuring myself, my way to let him know that I was masturbating over him, I added specific, sexual dialogue to my masturbation sessions. Honestly, if this didn't get him to have sex with me and fuck me, I don't know what would.

'Oh, the games we play for sex,' I thought while grateful for our sexual games. 'With us not wanting the other to know that we were having sex, we both continued to pretend that we weren't sexually intimate when we were. Never talking about it or discussing it, he continued fucking me and I continued I sucking him.'