All Comments on 'I Need to Process This Ch. 02'

Good story and very well written. I like where this may be going and hope they decide eventually to become a couple. Shame there cant be any babies though.

Great story, seems true to life---- who chicago

Had to "downgrade" you on this one. As good as a job as you did in part 1, in this part you carried the build and tension between the siblings too long. Not that you have to, but we never have heard why Mel treated Davie the way she did. I initially thought she did it in response to an "unnatural" attraction to her brother, but the narrative toward the end of this chapter indicates maybe not? 4*

You could use a proofreader. I'm not saying that in a derogatory manner. I just think it's a shame that writing like yours doesn't have that last little bit of polish on it to bring it up to a professional standard.

I am volunteering. If you'd like to discuss it. Contact me privately.

Was that enough said, or do I need to say I like it?

There is no explanation as to why she treated him so badly over all the years

Brilliant work. Love it. Great character development awesome build up. One writer to another you have talent!

Excellent story. I like where the plot is going. Though I would like to know why she treated him so badly for so long?

Nope, really good story. It will be exciting to see where it goes. But they need to clear the air between them. Why did she hate him for so long?

Just love the slightly wierd, mysterious slow burn. Really good character development. Can’t wait to see where this goes or how it gets there. Nice writing!

nice ;-)

Brilliantly written. Witty, but serious and never any doubt in the readers mind, that it's characters with depth of mind that could be for real.

I've hardly ever looked more forward to a continuation of the story than I do with your chapters.

Really need to look into what other stories you've written.

A good chapter, I like it a lot. AAAA++++