I Was Transformed Into A Toilet?!

"Fitting. Form. Useful."

Then she did something that filled me with hate. She pulled off the scrap of clothing that was her pants, practically ripping it off, and moved towards me. No. No way. I felt anger spike into my blood. Her next words almost sent me into a blind fury.

"Water. Lucky. For. Now."

I felt her ass down on top of me and I wanted to gag. She was smearing who knows on top of me just from sitting. I'm not saying all the other woman's asses hadn't been a bit sweaty or something but she was straight up dirty. The absolute fury I was feeling wasn't helping anything either. Lucky? For now? I was going to kill her.

I felt something in my mouth and-

'Ugh! What the fuck?! I'm gonna puke!'

I tried, I immediatly tried to gag and puke. What came out of her was piss only in name. It was the most rancid, disgusting thing I had ever tasted. I wouldn't be surprised if it was pitch black. It tasted like poison, motor oil, dirt, bitter beyond anything man could create, smoke somehow, and sour like acid from the back of the throat. It just kept pouring in, like hell's worst creation. Demon liquid. You could probably kill someone with this. Of course her piss was poison. I even felt pain in my toilet form from drinking it. The pain wasn't normal, it felt, magical in nature. Which was a weird sense I didn't even know I had but that's the only way I could think to describe it. Like something was trying to corrupt and melt my metaphysical being. It kept going and I was starting to get worried for my life. My tongue was already a lost cause and I was stuck in a horrible, horrible loop of trying to throw up and being completely unable to. I couldn't think, nothing but pure nastiness was in my brain anymore. Eventually, it stopped and she stood up. I was still reeling, suffering, forced to hold it in my mouth, to constantly taste it. I don't know how long it was, as I felt like a dog trying to scrape its tongue out, before I felt my entire being start having that sucking sensation I had become familiar with. I panicked and tried to stop it, tried to resist, because please god no.

But it was useless and hopeless. I felt it be shoved down my throat, burning along the way, past my continuous attempts to hurl, and then it hit my stomach like a toxic waste bomb. I was sick. That was not just how I was feeling mentally or physically, I instantly felt like I was actually sick, like I had been sick for a week straight. Like I had a fever, was tired, drained of all energy, felt like utter garbage, and wanted to sleep. That came along with my now new feeling of disgust at a height I hadn't known I could reach. This was foul and it was inside me. I felt, no, I was tainted. My stomach was now trying to remove its contents without me mentally desiring it, as a physiological reaction. I had a feeling that for normal people, it was literally impossible to swallow this Witch's piss without throwing up or possibly dying. The feeling of severe weakness and actual sickness waned eventually but it was, a, I didn't have a word for drinking poisoned magic piss. Fuck you?

Oh yeah. That'll do it. Because now rage was returning.

I looked up, knowing what I would find. The Witch hadn't left. Had just waited there, for who knows how long, just watching me suffer. I knew she couldn't hear me because I hadn't stopped yelling curses at her for one second and I was currently shouting at her at the top of my lungs.

She did, however, seem to feel my attention.

"Lucky. Water. Solid. Next."

My heart ran utterly cold and still. If she actually... I would probably die. No, a normal person would die. I might actually survive that. I was really, really unhappy that I was unable to throw up from disgust, actual biology, and fear. Because I needed it for all three right now. She moved towards me and I tried to figure out how to kill myself. When she reached me, dirty half naked body still out, she started saying familiar words.

But in reverse. I fucking knew it.

She touched me with her hand, palm facing outwards, and I was human again. I was surprised. After all of that, to just be human again. There wasn't a lot of room now, it wasn't exactly a mansion in here. I was standing over the toilet and she was less than a foot in front of me. I looked down, the weight of what was happening coursing through me. I started shaking and mumbled under my breath.

"Go. My. Home. Useful. There."

I kept mumbling. My heart rate was speeding up.

"Use. For. Water. Solid.'"

Almost there.

"Come. Or. Die."

That last word was said and a literal chill ran through the bathroom and death itself felt like it was scraping at my soul. Still, I kept mumbling, keeping my voice low. She tilted her head at me.

"Speak. Up."

I roared out the last four words, the words I had carefully memorized and played with for hours. The words I had hoped be my salvation. And now was the time.

"BAKA BEESA VILO BAKINE!"

I didn't know if it would work but I slammed my palm into her anyway. It was my only hope, I couldn't fight a Witch and when. No, she would have expected that, the fucking cunt.

To my actual shock, it worked and I immediately felt why. That utter poison she had pissed into me seemed to vanish and the magic from it roil up around my arm and out through my hand. She had put her own magic into me by accident and now it was coming back to bite her in the ass, the bitch.

My hand landed and her eyes widened in utter surprise before her eyes seemed to gleam like a wolve's and I realized she was a killer. Those were the eyes of someone who had killed and slaughtered before. She moved to do something horrible, hands straight like knives this time and both heading for my neck, when she stumbled. Probably due to the curse I had miraculously cast. I didn't waste the smallest chance and grabbed her head and slammed her into the toilet behind me.

It didn't seem to do a damn thing at first, besides moving her. Her head bounced off the toilet seat but she seemed like she hadn't even been touched. She actually fucking growled and I could feel the magic like hot coals being pressed against me. Her mere rage was nearly enough to burn me. Good god. I thought I was dead going to die but then she tried to move.

And her hands were stuck.

She looked back at me and her eyes were widened with fear, but it lasted less than a microsecond before she began speaking rapidly. My foot was already in the air, heading for her face. It wasn't some genius play where I knew she was going to try to curse me or counter curse or something like that. No, I was just filled with pent up rage from being a fucking toilet and used that I wanted to kick her head in. My full force kick slammed into her lower jaw and it didn't seem to do a damn thing. She didn't have any visible or even non-visible damage. The only thing it did, was shut her up.

But that was enough.

I got to watch as she seemed to turn ethereal and melt, while the toilet lit up with black fuzzy energy, before she was gone and there was only a normal toilet. I waited for a half second, not believing my luck, not believing any of my luck of today. Just waiting for the next shoe to drop, for her to undo the curse a complete bone head had done by pure luck, to rise up from the toilet and grab me and drag me to hell. None of that happened.

It was late, it was dark, the coffee shop was mostly empty, and the Witch was a toilet. Gone.

And I was free. I stood there, in shock. I had survived, I had made it, I had gotten through my ordeal. It seemed like everything had changed in only a short period of time. I knew, I could have suffered far worse. Forever. A million times worse than I had. And yet, that wasn't my fate. No. It was her's.

I was, I was mixed. Could someone be evil enough to damn them to an eternity of this? Probably. She was going to make me into her personal toilet somewhere and if she went #2 inside me... oh god. Part of me wanted to just kill her and be done with it... but... what if breaking the toilet free's her? Her wrath would probably make hell feel like a holiday. So, so this was it. I couldn't do anything else. And it serves her right.

I stumbled out of the stall and nearly ran into someone.

"Wh- Hey! This is a woman's bathroom you know? Whatever! Get out of the way!"

I did, only belatedly realizing I had heard that voice before. It was the taco bell woman from hours ago.

She cursed, loud enough for me to hear,

"Stupid mexican food!"

And then some, truly appalling sounds came out of the stall. If the Witch hadn't "freed" me, that'd be me in there right now. I grimaced. Well, what comes around goes around, you Witch bitch.

I left, knowing exactly what to do.

I was gonna puke, use some mouthwash, brush my teeth, and take showers, repeatedly till I felt clean again.

Then, I was going to start trying to learn this magic shit so that never happened again.

First though.... I really had to pee.