All Comments on 'I'm sorry, Alice.....NOT!!!'

Good one!

All tied up with a nice bow on the top!

5

Jumbled mess

OK, you had a 5 until that joke..

AA+

Too many spaces where it is hard to understand your chain of thought.

Kinda confusing Bear. A good editor would have improved it. But the BTB element makes it worth it.

just too short

Nothing new here. Same old same old.

Nothing new or interesting here, however well written. And, of course, because the story is so short, there is no character development or emotional involvement.

Good story. I like a man of action. The only sour note was the fact that our hero seems to have missed more than 20 years of his wife's fucking around. Duh... I had to ding you a star for that. On the other hand, I can always count on your guys to not "cuck out". 4 stars

Could have been fun, but the execution was sorely fucking lacking.

Pretty much no dramatic tension, no emotion, nothing. My shopping list makes for more exciting reading than this story.

I had trouble following who was who.

Fun but short.

If you’re going to do one of these tired and cliched, husband delivers comeuppance, you can at least have it make sense. Money is missing, somehow her card gets used, but people want to speak with her? Sure, she calls police on husband right there and says he stole money from business. Also, how do you abscond with a company, especially one that makes or requires products from other vendors? Dumb

Too choppy but glad for a BTB!

Vabdemonium, not Saddletramp!

great good laf

Nice. Short and to the point. Didn't realize Saddletramp does the lighten up theme also. Vandemonium and Creativity Takes Courage (CTC) always have a fun add on.

Nice burn but you constantly shifted from first to third person narrative. a pet peeve.

Wrong writer on the jokes

three years?!? stay with her 3 years after you find out?

The Bear may approve, but the reader is beyond bored.

The Tramp approves. Thank you! 5*!

Too much

I would expect much more payback since he is without biological children and may be an evolutionary dead end. Horace also needs some very serious physical punishment. Some permanent physical destruction. Not fatal just enough that he would wish he was dead.

Way too much crazy stuff, most out of the blue. Gave me a headache just reading it.

👍

5🌟

I'm giving this 5* because I can appreciate it for what it is, but it really needs a rewrite to make it read/flow better and be more structurally sound. It seems really odd that the wife could have gone through with such a long betrayal and not get caught while the husband was suddenly cunning enough to ruin her so completely. It's something I expect from this author and was not disappointed.

Looks like Alice Whorely is getting hers, and Mike's about to get his. Her name is Miranda...

put every BTB story ever written in a blender, pull out few random paragraphs, stitch them together, and this is what you get. Nothing novel, nothing believable, and frankly, not very coherent. Very, very far from your best work.

absolute bollocks

To short. No background . So he out flank the whore. Really. Not his kids 21. yrs a cheater. You call this a story

So he stole 750,000 and is leaving for Mexico with his secretary. What a messed up plot. 21 year he lived with this slut. Never figured it out till the last 3 years. Over the top story line .

Very good! Reading this after the previous story cured me. Thank you

Who dose not look at what is supposed to be your children birth certificate?

She cucked him for 21 years and tricked him into raising two bastards.

The consequences for her and Horace should've been much, much more severe.

Another good one LT. Thanks.

⭐⭐⭐⭐

Found nothing interesting.

Get a better editor

Keep writing.

Confusing and poorly written. Not particularly erotic. Two stars ⭐️ for this one.

Good BTB

One of the worst I have ever seen from this author.

Five Big Gold Stars. And a GOTCHYA for Alice. LP

Good Kind'a Gonzo!! 5/5!!

Poor delivery of a poor story line. As a parent, I can't even imagine how uninvolved he would have had to have been to never see the birth certificates. I know I've had to dig them out multiple times over the years. I'm also guessing that there are a lot of details in your head that would allow this to make more sense, but you failed to include them. All-in-all, it needs a major rewrite with an editor.

5 Stars BTB Well Done !!!

2 stars only to thank the author for making an effort. Storyline has been used innumerable times on this site and even so was given only an outline treatment here. Up your game a bit. You mentioned Saddletramp. Have another look at some of his higher rated offerings and think about what the differences are between this story and Saddletramp's best stories.

confused?

Have you confused Saddletramp with Vandi?

Good idea, however the wife cheated for 24 years? And not once left any clue? Every cheater makes a mistake at some point. Im surprised the husband was so clueless.

This just didn't work, no real narrative, just rambling sentence. One good thing is the main character never once asked if the other guys dick was bigger, so you do have that going for you.

A cheating wife tha thought she could get away with it for over 20 years? A husband that took twenty years to find out? It was a slam bam thank you mame though. Got her good, a good 4 stars

FTDS 1*

Cute

1 star - why would the slut be taking the kids - they should be in their 20's and on their own?

A not very good plot and the dialog sucked.

Not much of a payback. The guy has no children of his own. Step children are more like friends than real children. "Former secretary" probably is getting long in the tooth to have his own. The story just does not give the full experience. Still, thanks.

Great story. Terrible joke

so funny!

Nicely done, short but sweet

The plot lacked, and the execution as well.three stars

JPB NOT BOB