All Comments on 'In Four Seasons Ch. 02 - Spring'

You have a weird habit of putting a comma right before the last word of a sentence when it's not warranted, correct or even useful for dramatic effect. You do that especially often in lines of dialogue. Do that like 90% less, or even stop doing it entirely, and this would flow far better.

Other than that, an interesting, if very slow burn tale. Hopefully it will eventually go somewhere other than mutual confusion and frustration. Maybe they'll eventually learn how to just be honest with each other.

I know first story didnt get great reviews. But im enjoying the back and forth cat and mouse game with the tension between siblings. Please continue the story. But dont ruin it with a shitty ending. You have opened many avenues for siblings to pursue a future. Him getting her ass that she says will never happen, marriage in a garden for her.

Gave it 5 stars only cause im not a grammar police and the story is progressing nicely and find myself looking forward to it.

I hope this story runs as long as Houseboat

A great story, reminds me of Houseboat, one your recent stories that is a firm favourite of mine.

I hope this story has as many chapters as Houseboat. Keep writing these great stories.

I look forward to the next chapters. Scores 5/5

I like it so much he trying to not do that would be hard , when he does love her

@ Wargamer- I don't want to hurt your feelings or anything, but didn't you pay attention to the title? 🙃 I may be totally wrong but I'm only expecting two more installments for this one. 4 and done.

If I'm remembering my own comments from the first chapter, I think that I said that I felt like you had rushed into publishing it too quickly losing some of your quality in the process. That's certainly NOT the case this time around. I thoroughly enjoyed this episode. But just as a personal aside, I'm going to have to go back and read both parts together all over again to get back into the characters again. I like this one a whole lot. You had me hooked from the moment that you decided to have them travel by train. Even though I'm enjoying this one though, I'm not as tied tightly as I am to the story about Will and Katie.

Again, good job! 5/5

Hmm. I'll be honest, even though I *love* brother-sister, this didn't grab me the way Toofy has... But I can't wait for the next chapter.

Too mu h the same especially with the same characters and same storyline with brother fighting his insecurities and sister just horny for anything

I think it was absolutely awesome! Love the tension and how the two characters process their feelings. Cant wait for more!

Much better than chapter 1, a little of this chapter in that piece would have been excellent....

Still chaotic and imperfect in their communication and love, they struggle forward to whatever will be, raw, and learning, and trying.

Maybe you have a type, Shakna, whether she likes houseboats or trains....

Love the real ness of it totally plausible story line. 5*