All Comments on 'Inee the Jungle Girl'

And I thought the characters and their relationship could have been fleshed out better.

What? Where do I have spelling errors? I double checked everything for spelling. The only spelling errors I could have is "then" and "than". I never know when to use which.

And IDK how I could've delved into their relationship more. I wanted to mainly focus on the sex. I was gonna include a wedding night sex scene, but the story was already too long.

Ignore the 'PC Brigade', most people think there is only the UK or American versions but in fact there is 15, yes, fifteen different versions of English, each with their spelling and syntax etc: OK we all get confused and we mainly writing for fun...and not looking for that 'Booker' prize. So keep writing because it helps to develop your understanding of english be it UK English, American or some other form.

How creative! But Lit only allows 5 stars. ************************************

Well, it is fiction after all. Spelling errors, misused words, meh, who cares, a very interesting tale. One thing, satellite phones need the batteries charged on occasion. Loved the story in spite of the numerous errors and leaps of logic.

Thanks. IDK if anyone has ever done a story on indigenous women before. I thoughts be something different.

Okay. I still don't know where these spelling errors are. I went through it three times and fixed all the words that had red lines. Maybe it missed some. Misused words I believe. My vocabulary is pretty basic, and I know some sentence structure could've been better. But some of them I wrote as a way Indegenous people with limited English would speak. Oh, I didn't know that about the satellite phone, and I know there were some logic flaws, but in the end, the sex and concept is the most important. That's why It's called "fiction". In Poland we have a saying, "a smart person won't notice, an idiot will think it's supposed to be like that"

Thanks for the feedback

I assume that you meant "fetal" position (curled up like a fetus), and "waist"band (waist = midsection, waste = trash). You misused "waste" (meaning "waist") several times. There were other errors, but these are the ones I remember.

Ah shit, really? I looked up how to spell feedle and that's what it showed. There are words I know, but never write. And I thought I corrected all the waist bands. Maybe I missed some, or msybe my edited version didn't save, which it sometimes doesn't.

I'm truly surprised because I went over it like three times and was super careful to change everything. But with such a large story it's easy to miss something. At least you pointed them out. I appreciate it. I'll be more careful next time. My spellings still not as bad as the Indian stories. lol

Was the sex good though?

Use a spell checker in the future. It will make your stories more believable and enjoyable. Also, your ending was anti-climactic.

Apparently not. Well, spell check just shows me if I spelled it correctly, not whether I used the correct word.

I know. I could 've made the ending better, but it was already too long, and I wanted to get it out. And I figured people would lose interest after the sex part anyways. I wanna make this into a full length book.

Why would a civilised guy settle for life with a hot young native girl. They are two a penny, & sex is available most places. He must have settled for her because her pussy was the best he had enjoyed.

Otherwise I followed your writing & deem it well worth reading.

Thanks for your story.