All Comments on 'IOU'

The journey to sex is always more interesting than the act itself - very well written, well paced - few stories on this site are anywhere near as good, and it has been a very long time since there was one that was even arguably better

I like the arch style. Fine writing, if a little disturbing in an unconventional way. Thank you Simon.

This was very well written! I loved the out-of-order sequencing, and the way you created solid characters with a minimum of words.

Your writings are simply delightful. You do an exquisite job of painting a mental canvas, to allow the reader to feel a part of the characters.

You're absolutely correct. You don't say 'no' to something you've longed for!

is always thought-provoking and innovative. I particularly admire the way in which you wrote the mind and behaviour of the young woman in the story, while the interaction between the two was very provocative, because of the subtlety of expression. A really fine and most enjoyable story. Thank you.

He's just as much of a predator as the twins, just way more subtle about it. He's manipulated her, and given their different levels of experience and sophistication, his manipulating her IS using superior force. Oh, it's not physical force, sure, but when the differences in capacity are this great, it's very nearly as potent a weapon as physical force ... just a lot more deniable. Are you intentionally making him a predator who's hiding behind the facade of a nice guy, or is that only the realization of someone who has my, er, advantage of experience with you? Nicely written, of course, but that's part of what made me twitchy -- it seems sort of smoothly plausible that he's a nice guy, except he's NOT.

Vocative, evocative, provocative, POP! Man alive, do you know how to work the language. So many layers, in so few words. Complex characters, clearly depicted ambivalence, vivid portraiture of what goes under the skin and under the speech. Truly superlative writing. I wish I knew how you do it.

Badly fragmented and Confused. You need an editor maybe to help you keep on the right track, or something.