All Comments on 'It Runs in the Family'

Lovely new story by a new writer, looking forward to many new stories, very enjoyable read.

Great story rock hard!

Great story, but switching back and forth between narrators was confusing, especially on the beginning.

A bit of constructive criticism:

One shakes their head side-to-side so as to indicate a NO/negative response.

One NODS their head up-and-down so as to indicate a YES/positive response.

Sequel please

One ☝️Of the best stories yet! Sure hope there’s a part 2.

Some great scenarios but the dialogue was hard to follow.

I loved the story, but proofreading for spelling and grammar would help. Switching the narrator between characters from one paragraph to the next took some getting used to. There should be some indication when you are switching narrators, so the reader does not have to put as much effort into recognizing the switch. Maybe a rewrite into third person would help with the flow.

Very hot n erotic theme, could be a little slower, more details, taboo factor adds to become great story.

Thank you so much!!!

Wow. A good story. But very hard to read. The ever-changing point of view was difficult to keep up with; much more annoying than the typographical errors. I was glad to wade through to the end; underneath it all there was a good story there.

And now for the constructive part of the criticism: Simply put an extra blank like or a line of three asterisks **** to mark the changed. It becomes obvious and purposeful. Then read each section from back to front. You’ll probably catch the typos and wrong words and wrong tense that way. I think we’re from the same part of the country where we say “would of” it is really a contraction of “would have”, which is written “would’ve”

You put a lot of effort into telling a good story. A little more would make it better. Or you could be like my English friend who writes on a tablet, shuts off comments, and doesn’t care.

Great story. However whole story is not said from POV of Sarah and when dialogue changes between persons without indication who is talking making it little hard to read. Apart from that great piece of writing.