by theoldone
but you desperately need a spell checker if nothing else. I don't think there was a sentence without at least one misspelled word. And some words missing and tenses mixed!
One thing wrong with the story---he's an asshole.
I know that scenario is nothing unusual but it is a shameful thing, especially the WAY he left.
I sure hope you continue this storie line. It has a lot of potential. Both players have a long trip to find there way back.