All Comments on 'July 4th, My Sister, the Lake Ch. 04'

You had me at the title.

I hate to think this is over. It was along wait from the last chapter to now but well worth it. I look forward to the next chapter if you are so inclined, or the next story. I'll now have to reread the whole series as a book and enjoy it all again. Thank you for your work.

I have been waiting for this sequel and was not disappointed.Five stars. Hopefully, there will be another chapter or two in the near future.

Maybe I'm a sucker for happy endings, but I just loved the way you wound this up!

I was lucky in the sense that I just read all 4 parts in succession, rather than spreading it out over 2 years. I got into how things were going to resolve themselves between the three protagonists,. and I think you got the ending just right.

It might be interesting to see how the characters carried on in future years, in terms of eventual marriage (who marries whom?) and children, etc. For now though, I think I'd leave well enough alone. Well done!

You picked the wrong way to go.

Lost me. You went off theme - bad call.

Please continue at least one more chapter. As previously mentioned, do they marry? Children? After Bella graduates, do they tell their parents?

Very well done. I can see the dilemma about whether to include Shane in the ending, but I think this was the better way to go.

jwoodie, I appreciate them.

Very well done, great story, I also believe you chose the correct ending

Didn't like the adding of Shane into the mix. Not the way these particular characters where developed. If they were different, like maybe if the siblings wanted to fool around with her playfully, maybe then it would have worked. But I see too much emotional involvement between the siblings. Making Bella experience that much jealousy over Shane was in my view, a mistake. Then adding her into a serious incestual relationship will inevitably weaken it. That's just how I see it.

Great story. I don't normally like sibling incest stories that involve a third party in he relationship but it works in this story.

While the sex was good the love between the Bella, Sam and Shane was better and there's nothing I like better in a story than a happy ending.

You can love two people at once! But carefully!

I wish I had Sam's insight to loving two but…

hc

When will people that write these incest stories between siblings keep it between siblings I get so mad when everyone wants another girl or guy get involved.

Hey if you don’t like someone’s works, write one that satisfies yourself

To be honest, I'm ambivalent about the whole Shane/No Shane dilemma. I always say, "It's YOUR story. Write it however you want." If I don't like it, then that's on me, not the author. I liked this ending just fine, but would have been just as happy if it went the other way.

Now, for my question... Sam knew about Shane and Bella before he turned to school, after the lake, so why wouldn't Bella and Shane have returned to having sex while Sam was away? Seems perfectly natural to me. I can't imagine that Sam would have had a problem with that.

In a way, this ending to the story illustrates the old adage, "If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't return, it was never yours to begin with." Shane let Bella go, but she returned to her in the end.

One of my goal's in writing this story was to make the emotional bond between Bella and Shane as strong as the emotional bond between Bella and Sam. The comments I received show that, at best, this goal was imperfectly achieved. Your observation, stated more broadly, that I could have (a) returned to focus on the Bella/Shane relationship after Sam returned to California and (b) discuss how Sam felt about that relationship, is an excellent one that I will employ if I ever face this situation again.

after reading some of the comments, i know you could have gone different ways in chapter 3 and 4 - maybe even 2. but the last couple of pages in this chapter really set this work apart from others in my view, and i'm glad you went the way you did (although i probably would have loved any ending). its an erotic tale of love and acceptance, and i ilke in the end no one "lost". you're a great story-teller!

I may not speak for everyone but I think this story ended the best way it could of great story

5 *

I have read your writing and you need no external validation. Your writing and instincts are spot-on. Thank you!

Bella's deepthroating, with Shane's coaching, was great. Also, Bella may have been on birth control, but what about Shane? Anyway, I think a sequel to this series is an absolute must!

BEYOND 5*

4 Stars. To me this was the least enjoyable story of an otherwise 5 star series. That said, it was still a good if far less believable story. Like (using the author's numbers) the other 50% of readers I'd have rather read about Sam and Bella living happily ever after as a couple, but it's the author's story and it was still pretty good.

The last part should have 3 of them living together while both get preg. It could have to be so romantic. Sam like a king with 2 gorgeous lovers.

Thank you for this wonderful love story.

Great idea, well written, and I‘m a big fan of Bella and Shane, not to forget her brother.

Both girls are sexist assholes who mistreat him constantly. The only good thing he gets from them is sex. He needed to put his sis in her place once and at least treat her like shit once. She was an asshole and never even said sorry. This is disappointing. He needed to stand up for himself and slap the shit out of both of them.

You are what give us guys such bad reps. Hit her? Really? Why, because you're reading skills are so effing poor you missed the part where she apologized? {{effing idiot...}}

@MaryAnderson

You wrote a realistic story of a sister in love with their big brother, who then fell in love with her first boyfriend's sister. People forget all three of them are young; they have no clue about themselves at 18-21 years old. No one that age does, they only THINK they do. Anyone disagreeing with me needs to put 60+ years into life, then come back and review this disagreement. If you're intellectually honest when do, you'll agree with me.

Our society has not evolved enough to get past the societal norms against incest. Medical science says there is less danger of a genetically damaged child between siblings than there is with a 40 year old mother, but that's science, not societal norms.

Does anyone really think Sam and Bella can just tell their parents after Bella is done at Stanford? Or Master's work? Or her PhD? Post Doc studies? LOL Fuck, no!

Developing a triad relationship is the only way Sam and Bella can continue their relationship; Shane becomes the perfect 'beard'. Marriage? Who gives a fuck about marriage? It is just a piece of paper. It's the committment, honestly and love that counts. Children/partners, etc can be protected through the legal process.

Not that you need my validation, but you wrote this intelligently, and more realistically than the majority of bro-sister tales on Lit, and it is refreshing that you did.

I absolutely loved this ❤ 💖 ♥. Thank you for the triad ending. Absolutely the best...well, almost... the only improvement that I can think of is if Sam knocked up Shane and she confessed her condition in the moment of afterglow. Bella squees and expresses her eagerness at becoming an aunt. Then they lived happily ever after.

Great story, I only wished you continued on.. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I should not have read chapter 4. The girls picked each other and use Sam when they want a cock. He should have kicked both to the curb and got somebody that would respect him. Respect is a big part of any relationship. Sick

This was a wonderful series! I wish it had an epilogue where we see them several years later and Sam and Shane are married with his sister living with them all in one bedroom.

What a perfect, gorgeous resolution.

I love triads. I know perfectly well from my own experience that it IS possible, even natural, to love and be in love with more than one person at a time. And I love this theme of the two indirectly-linked members DECIDING to love directly, and then working toward that goal; if I would change one thing about this story, it would be to devote more words to developing and illustrating that process.

My spouse and I are both apparently 100% straight, which puts this resolution out of our reach -- unless one of us one day finds that Shane-like exception. I'm not sure I can HOPE for that -- our days grow ever shorter -- but this story makes me WISH for it.

Five stars, obviously. Thank you again!

First, having read several of your stories, it is obvious that you have a great deal of skill as a writer who is filled with wonderful stories to tell.

Second, despite all of the negative comments and advice on where to take your story lines, you have to remember that these ultimately your stories, and you must follow your own muse to remain true to yourself.

Third, as an avid reader, I find great pleasure in reading the stories that come from the writer's heart.

You have a gift in being able to express yourself that you should be extremely proud to possess. Keep up the good work, and remember that you will never be able to please all of the people all of the time. Know that you make many of us happy by sharing your work.

Excellent thank you for a great read

Nice early chapters. But shouldn't have brought Shane into the story, was pretty pointless. The only thing she did for the story was show a darker side of Bella. Which could as easily been done by directing the jealousy towards the brother in some other situation instead.

It is unnecessary to shift my focus, as a reader, to a potential 2nd love interest for a thruple. Now I am becoming invested in this new character. But nothing comes of it. It does not bring any positive experiences. Even if Shane does not get sexually involved she should bring some positive experiences to the story when she has been given so much space. Be it comedic relief, reliable ally in an adventure etc. Give her a positive weight.

The good thing is that I got to see a bit more of the life of Bella and Sam as a couple. Majority of other authors' stories are much too short and ends shortly after intercourse has been had.

- Tomboll

Ignore what I just wrote. One third of the story did not load properly for me. Going to read the rest later. My apologies.

- Tomboll

Tender, insightful and well written - as ever it seems. I’m deeply jealous of Sam😎. Learning of your Parkinson’s diagnosis I do feel for you and wish you well. Gordon.

Not to sound so negative the plot to begin with in these stories was great and while yes you can love more than 1 person you can't be in love with more than 1 you went all over the place with that in these last 2 chapters especially this chapter I mean 1 minute the sister was madly in love with her brother and the next she's madly in love with the other girl and you had a huge time jump as well with no explanation he went for a walk and the went to 3 years had gone by really where the hell was he for those 3 years we all like a little lesbian sex and a threesome with 2 girls now that's out of the way it's time to finish the story she's got to choose a relationship like that with 1 guy and 2 girls can't work not even in the slightest write another chapter and finish it with a proper ending regardless of who she ends up with though in my opinion I think she should end up with him but that's just me all and all I give it 3 stars would have been more but as I said too many things in this story stood out and can't be over looked if all the people that said it was an amazing story and so forth had any common sense on what a truly amazing story was they would have also agreed with the 3 star rating 3 stars isn't a bad thing it just means have a lot of room to improve on and you should definitely keep writing to approve on your skills as a writer

@dark_storm the point isn't her returning to having sex hell any straight guy would love to see the 2 go at it once or twice the point is that he wrote it that she was madly in love with Shane 1 minute and then Sam the next yes you can love more than 1 person at a time but no you can't be in love with more than 1 person at a time that was the point the other point is she basically chose the Shane while claiming in the first 3 chapters of being in love with Sam and in the end they used him when ever they wanted dick I have read back through all comments there were more negative comments about it then positive and after reading this chapter for good reason and for many different things yes the series it self was good but this last chapter almost completely ruined it any reader that's a real man which is why it deserves a 3 star rating for the entire series

@Mfkndragon - speak for yourself, friend. You're totally wrong.

The CORRECT answer is that not everyone is capable of being in love with more than one person at the same time, you yourself being a self proclaimed example. But everyone is an individual and each of us has a different capacity for loving another person.

I fully understand what you are saying about the difference between loving someone and being IN LOVE with someone. I know that distinction extremely well and can honestly say that I have, indeed, been in love with two different girls at the same time.

So what you feel like is impossible for you is extremely possible for me. It's very sad that your point of view isn't broad enough to allow for that. "In Love" as you're defining it equates to monogamy. It doesn't have to be that way. Three people can decide to be exclusive within their Triad demonstrating their commitment and love for each other.

-

Addressing the story specifically, Bella becomes the catalyst for Sam and Shane to love each other. Bella is truly in love with both of them. Sam is truly in love with Bella and so is Shane. While Sam and Shane may never reach a point of being in love with each other, they do love one another and have the potential to become closer, eventually finding themselves to be in love. I would like to have seen the three years later part include one or both of the girls pregnant with Sam's child. But as written, I'm certain that it's destined to be in their future anyway. 5/5

But what.next? When the natural needs of a woman to have a child(dren). Another chapter maybe????

LeB

You are great writer!

I am so glad you took the story to a joyous conclusion with the three of them in a hot connection with all enjoying the fruits of the sexual passion

Triads are tough. With a couple, at least one, at any given time, needs to feel or remember that the couple needs to work together when there is trouble in paradise. With three, the dynamics are tougher, two can get rid of the third easily (haphazardly? too quickly?) when there is a problem. If the two that are more in tune both have a problem with the third, those two are already weaker candidates for keeping their eyes on the ball of triad maintenance, and the odd-person out is a suspect character for visible maintenance. Sex is not enough, there has to be a 3-way commitment, with that commitment felt by all a fair bit of the time. All the time? No, no *one* is, or no *three* are, perfect.

I feel like something stronger, like marriage, pregnancy, or shared tragedy would make for a stronger bond. Watching Bella grow or mature (or decide she wants these two particular lovers) is not enough of a bond for Shane and Sam, or for the three, IMO.

Shane could have used a bit more development, especially with some non-sexual, non-let's-have-a-relationship, type of thing with Sam for bonding.

So, about that extended lit and relationship crit....

Really liked the story, five for you

Good depth, good grip on interpersonal relationships and imaginative melding of three people who valued each other most deeply ... Made one wish for such an opportunity

perfect culmination after a long buildup ... love is limitless, however humans commonly limit the possibilities with their narrow, selfish, dogmatic thinking ... cheers!

Great story. Perfect ending.