All Comments on 'Just a Little Magic Ch. 10'

Thank goodness: yesterday's offering was a bit of a shock. It is though beginning to become a bit of a slog, I think the formula has overtaken the joy of writing this time and the pacing has taken a bit of a hit. I think the length of the list is going to be a big hurdle to overcome and keep the pace of the writing fresh and exciting.

Phew, it’s really you again.

Yes, the pace of these girls is going to be exhausting for him and I cannot wait to see what conflicts will arise from this ridiculous task of managing so many women at the same time. You have unlimited story lines that can come from this and I hope that you might go into more detail. You could easily triple the length of these chapters which would take this story to the epic level.

This is all the setup and distraction part of the magic act. Our hero is so involved in the day to day and the cards (women) being shown to him that he isn't expecting or seeing the long game at hand.

I stand by my suspicion that Lillian and the other witch are manipulating him TO create the coven that they need or something to that effect. In essence he is the lead bad guy but just doesn't actually know it.

His falling in love and maintaining that love through the various conquests and tryst's of his own are contributing.

I agree with ag2507, the stories of wooing these women is a little tedious. He just can't feel much passion for these women, and forcing himself on them is going to be ruinous to his soul and his primary relationship. The only one he seems to really be attracted to is Vicky. He's reasonable intelligent, he should have figured out he doesn't have to impregnate these 12 women, he could just one, his main paramour right now to block his dad. Peter needs more agency or curiosity. He should figure out this things doesn't make sense and he's being manipulated to do these women.

Love how you’re taking the time to give each person on the list a little character development, otherwise it’ll be a long and repetitive run thru this phase of the story.

I find the individual attention that you have him give each “target” to be interesting and while the sex could eventually seem repetitive, you vary it up enough and continue to put his thoughts and ideas into each encounter so it remains fresh to me. It was very smart to have someone take the job of keeping track of when to email, send gifts and the like because that would be impossible unless you risked writing it down where Sammy or someone else might come across it. If you add the actual travel and city information along with doing the actual shows then you would be a wreck and most likely every area of your life and plan would suffer. I still think that he is not seeing the way he is being played by Lillian and Janine and possibly whoever else might be involved in their plan. I think he is going to somehow be the magical lynchpin in what they are claiming is this rape conspiracy of women which is going to be caused by the witches but that’s just a guess on my part. I have continued to not only enjoy this story but I actively look forward to and check for the next chapter since I find myself incredibly invested in the entire plot and characters while watching it all be played to its eventual conclusion whatever that might be. You have obviously had to be loads of time and thought into creating this tale with all the characters and locations and how to make everything flow without running into anything which would screw up your storyline and it is impressive to say the least. I will happily continue to watch and wait for each chapter with the knowledge that you will entertain and impress me again. Thank you for all you have been putting into these chapters since it can’t be easy and I appreciate the effort along with the story.

Stay safe, be well and get enough rest since overwork is never a good thing.

J.D.

The 13 women all have magic talent, right, not just Janine? Maybe I'm just missing it, but it doesn't seem like we've seen much inkling of their talents to date.

Good point, anonymous. The 13 women on the list are from magical bloodlines. But so is Peter - and he would never have known it if Janine and Lillian hadn't contacted him.

I am waiting for the two witches to flip the switch and be the true people with ill intent. I am enjoying your story very much.5s on all of the chapters.

I'm actually enjoying running down this list of women, and seeing how Peter adjusts, as he's really in the same boat as they are (limited experience in many ways) and so are they. I'm seeing you give us (like Peter gave Kavia) enough details to hook us on them, as see if we will wait to see how Peter (through your hand) manages all this.

I think another commenter may have succeeded by pointing out we're at Ch 10 and have yet to see Peter's mysterious dad--but we have always at least had hints of Janine's and Lillian's existence. Also historically (just by the name), Lillian always proves a scheming nemesis that doesn't tip her hand until she thinks she can succeed in pulling off whatever coup she's trying to set up.

Tossing that aside, it still prove interesting in how you credibly develop all the other women and maintain the intrigue without ruining Peter and Sophie. You've always done well in your other tales of multiple partners and played it well and convincingly--although this one may be more of a tightrope.

I will say I dislike Kavia quite a bit too--but while the story states Peter is NOT trying to change her, change always occurs when someone is challenged--IF they continue to be challenged and aren't so hard-hearted/stubborn that they outright refuse because it's going to be their way or the highway. Oddly enough, while I'm not expecting Kavia to change hugely, she HAS changed to small degrees, because if she was truly the "queen bitch," she would have thrown Peter out of her place when he changed the agenda on her and had her order in--AND she did not melt down when he lit into her for showing him off at the cricket match. There is some evidence she CAN change...would I want her to? I'd kind of like to see Peter continue to have the stones to challenge her and turn the tables on her so that maybe she realizes no one really likes how she acts. I see you using Kavia to grow his experience so he can further confront Janine and even Lillian if needed.

I will tell you that I'm expecting the Belgian female to be as much of a challenge as Kavia, as my experiences with Belgian females (just like the French) was that they are stand-offish, a but superior, relatively unconcerned about people's feelings, and otherwise just a little removed from other's experiences. The rest of females reflect typical personality differences (as well as cultural) one would find in dating widely...so it is a shock to him, but had he ever come across a Japanese female, he would have known about a few of those "strange sounds" he doesn't care for. I'd suggest that despite how "off-putting" he finds that, that he investigate more into the reason behind those--as it really isn't hard to find out. Even that "Lolita" trend is a very Japanese cultural trend among the females to dress that way--it reflects the concept of "cuteness," tied to Pikachu, which started around the late 80s I believe. Thanks for tossing in genuine cultural elements like that. I'm also fascinated by Vicky, because she challenges him on a different level: thinking outside the box to keep her talking and drawing her out--which that type of personality had to arise sooner or later--and while initially tortorous--can be navigated and handled. That's largely managed by spending enough time with her to help convince her to share her thoughts and convince her not to doubt herself and that sharing her thoughts is not a weakness (and nor will people think less of her if she shares or even if she makes a mistake).

NOW I'm really looking forward to the next installments. A five for all the genuine cultural elements you've managed to include and how you've managed the characters so far.

An interesting story, though I’d enjoy more focus on points of interest and a quicker pace. An oddity for harem stuff, tho...he’s going after women even he doesn’t want, and the hot girl encouraging it is barely involved and generally unpleasant. Curious to see where it goes.

All these women have had their long term relationships or marriages broken off month before Peter came around, he knows that Lillian did a tour before hand to plant him in the women's heads, possibly more, it really doesn't take much thought to link the 2, sometimes it's like I'm ready a PG rated story, it seems too obvious

I normally comment at the very end of the story but I have to make an exception on this occasion. I do appreciate the story thus far. Aspern, you're an incredibly gifted, talented and imaginative artist. The way you describe Kavia's personality is quite novel but so vivid that I can imagine her face. Her type of character is very different from the general array of characters. She's not appealing in any way but I do appreciate how you have developed her character...!

So yeah, all the mysterious marriages ending and boyfriends dropping them so they can be single for Pete. Yeah nothing is wrong there. I guess that's why they said don't worry about it when he was concerned they wouldn't be single. Also fuck bitches like Kavia, seriously. Sure they may be hot, but if you keep entertaining their bullshit, they'll never bloody learn. At least Pete seems to be doing the smart thing and telling her he won't stand for her shit.