Kaitlyn's April Fools' Joke

Kaitlyn's April Fools' Joke

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This story is submitted for the April Fools Day Story Contest 2024.

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"You drew the short straw, Kaitlyn!"

"Yeah, you get to pull the April Fools' trick this year."

"So glad it wasn't me!" added another voice.

"Now, guys, we need to come up with a good trick for her. Everybody, come on, think of a good one."

Kaitlyn sat stunned in the middle of her sorority group. Indeed, she had drawn the short straw and tradition was the loser had to perform a big April Fools' trick or gag. She had no idea what the rest of the girls would decide but it was sure to be something mean; at least the ones in the past years had been fairly nasty, some of them, anyway. 'I wonder what they'll come up with?' she thought.

After another round of shots, most of the girls were feeling no pain and their giddy voices rose in timbre and pitch. Several ideas were tossed around the group. "We could make her streak the Sigma house!"

"Nah, that's not really an April Fools' gag and anyway, the guys would like it, wouldn't they, Kaitlyn? Your bod is so damn hot."

"I guess," she stammered.

"Oh, it is," shouted another girl, "I'd die happy to have a figure like yours."

"Anyway, guys, keep thinkin'," added another.

Several minutes later and after a few other ideas were tossed out and summarily discarded, Kaitlyn's sorority president Shelly shouted out, "Let's make her ask out a nerd and then she dumps him on the first."

Kaitlyn was stunned. 'That would be so fuckin' cruel,' she thought, 'Invite a guy out and then drop him.' She stood up and, looking at the others, said, "No way! That's just cruel. Won't do it!"

"But if we decide, you'll do it. You have to, Kait. Remember, you're just a freshman and if you want to be a permanent member of this sorority, you will do what we decide," said Shelly.

"I'll do what y'all decide but please, pick something else."

Her little plea seemed to have the opposite effect from what she had hoped. The drunk sisters seemed to smell blood in the water and all turned on her. Within a few minutes, the vote was twenty-seven to one she would have to ask a nerd out, get to know him and dump him on April first while telling him it was all for April Fools'.

A short time later she dragged herself up the stairs to her third-floor room. There, a sense of nausea ripped through her as she thought about some guy being teased and dumped. How mean! How could she do that? Her only option was to refuse but she knew from others how such defiance in the past had caused some to be shunned for the rest of the year before being kicked out of the sorority. She liked the sorority and she had made what she thought were some good friends there. But where were they that night and why hadn't they supported her? Maybe their friendships were too superficial to mean anything. Or maybe the alcohol-fueled group psychology had simply won out.

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After a nightmare-filled night, a groggy Kaitlyn went downstairs for breakfast. She was the only one in the dining room as it appeared everyone else was sleeping in or too hung over to face breakfast. She had a cup of coffee and made herself a waffle before heading off to the library.

Saturdays were prime study times for her; no one would bother her and she could spread everything out over one of the large library tables. After sorting out all her references, she started working on a major paper which was due the following week. She worked non-stop for hours and before she knew it, the old clock in the library tower chimed five pm.

'Wow, that sure went by quickly,' she mused to herself as she began packing up her papers, books and computer. Back at the house, she dropped her things off in her room and went nervously to the dining room while wondering if the events of the previous night would be discussed.

"There you are! We were wondering if you had taken off."

"Nope. Working on a major paper due this coming week."

"Well," said another, "You missed our discussion on your April Fools' gag. Since it's only four weeks away, we need you to get to work right away and get a guy."

"But what about Spring Break?" she asked.

"Exactly. That's all the more reason you have to get busy. It's only three weeks of time when you consider the break."

"No, I'll be staying here. My folks are on a vacation and I've got no one at home to stay with so I'll be here."

"Cool. That way you can, like, uh, try to seduce him during the break, too."

"Seduce? I thought I was going to just, you know, go out with him or something."

"No, in order for this to work the best, you should try to get him in the sack. With most guys that wouldn't be a problem but a nerd might freak out, so you'll have to slowly seduce him."

"I don't know..."

"Kaitlyn, you've gotta do it. It's tradition and in order to remain in the sorority, well, you know."

On her way back up the stairs, Kaitlyn was even more despondent. She was supposed to sleep with the guy! She had never had sex and even her dating history was limited to a few single dates in high school where essentially nothing happened except for a few kisses, even at the prom.

Kaitlyn was a single child of two very busy professionals and ended up being alone for much of her childhood. Once she was old enough to take care of herself, she was expected to remain alone in the house while her parents worked. As a result, she never did any afterschool activities or have a group of close friends and was pretty much a loner at school. She had joined the sorority mainly to force herself to meet more people and develop some friendships. However, she had never expected to end up in the situation she was in: being forced to seduce and then dump a guy.

The more she thought about it, the madder she became. This was nuts. This was cruel. This served no purpose but to hurt an innocent person, a person she didn't even know. But if she didn't do it, her life at the house would essentially come to an end. Sure, she could stay and keep her room and have meals but she would be shunned, she was sure of it. Her fees until summer had all been paid and if she left early, her parents would squawk about the wasted expenses. And where could she go so late in the school year?

The stress and worry ended up giving her a killer headache. She swallowed a couple of Tylenol and went to bed early. 'I'll think about it tomorrow,' she thought as she drifted off to sleep.

-----

Sunday morning dawned bright with a promise of the coming spring. After she had her breakfast, she joined all her sisters in the main ball room for their weekly meeting. Several issues were discussed and plans were made for the upcoming fundraising auction and dance. Right as the meeting appeared finished and Kaitlyn went to stand up, the sorority president spoke up, "One last thing to discuss: Kaitlyn, we've been thinking about it and we're going to assign you your nerd tomorrow. You will need to come with us to the student union for lunch and there we'll find your guy. OK?"

"I, uh, I still don't want to do it. It's not a nice thing to do and..."

"Kaitlyn, I don't think you understand you really have no say in this. We voted and it will be done. Understand?"

"But, uh, do you truly think it is a good idea for us to do this? We could get a bad reputation and..."

"The house won't get a bad reputation at all. This will be a simple little arrangement between you and the nerd and no one will be the wiser. So, are you in or out?"

With her back to the wall, the fire in Kaitlyn was snuffed out. She nodded meekly and was told to be at the SU at noon. The three members of the sorority board would be there and point out the guy she was to pick up.

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With her stomach in turmoil, Kaitlyn walked up the steps to the student union a few minutes before noon on Monday. She easily found the three girls from the board committee sitting at a table in the middle of the cafeteria. They all had small lunches and coffees in front of them. She was offered food but her nerves and nausea wouldn't let her eat. She glumly shook her head 'No' and sat with the others.

"Now, Kaitlyn, we've been looking around here and there are plenty of good candidates, so many that we probably won't be able to pick one victim. Look at that table over there. See the two? They'd be OK. And over there are three sitting together. We've been trying to decide and Becca likes this guy," she said while pointing to a short, skinny guy, "Ginger thinks that one over there should be the one and I'm not sure yet which one you should end up with."

"Look," Kaitlyn said with as much nerve as she could muster, "If you're gonna make me do this, then I think I should have a say in this."

"No! We'll choose."

"OK, then let's compromise. Since you all can't decide, you point out the table and I'll choose."

After discussing it among themselves, the board finally agreed. "OK, you get to choose. That table over there is the one. Now get busy."

"You mean right now?"

"Sure, that way we can be sure you're starting this."

Kaitlyn looked over at the table. There were three guys sitting there and clearly, they met the criteria set up by the board. The first was a short Asian guy with greasy hair and coke-bottle glasses; in fact, all wore glasses. The second was overweight and sported a buzz cut. The third had some potential. He was a taller blond with slightly shaggy hair which at first appeared to be simply uncut but on closer look, she could tell it was reasonably stylish. His retro glasses featured nearly round lenses surrounded by thick, tortoise-shell frames. Beneath his Mario Brothers T-shirt, she could tell there might even be some muscles! Yes, he might just be the one.

As she tried to work up the nerve to approach him, she realized she recognized him. He was in one of her classes...was it chemistry or calculus? Her mind raced until she remembered; chemistry. With that in mind, she stood up, bought a cup of coffee and drifted to his table. As she approached, all three looked up. The tall, decent-looking one looked her in the eye with a tiny smile on his lips.

"Yes?"

"Uh. Hi, uh, I'm Kaitlyn and I was wondering if you're in Henderson's Chem 102 class with me."

"Yeah, I am."

"Uh, I'm looking for a study partner and was wondering if maybe we could work together sometime, you know, and maybe help each other."

"I don't need a study partner. I've pulled an A so far this term."

"Ah, well, my grades haven't been so good," she lied, "And I'm looking for someone who might, you know, might help me with some of the harder stuff."

"I'm sorry, but I don't..."

"Dude," piped up the overweight guy, "Nice girl asks you for help and you're turning her down? Jeez, if I took chemistry I'd jump at the chance."

"It's OK, really, I guess I'll find someone else to help." She turned away but before she was five feet from the table, she heard him call from behind her.

"Ah, look, maybe we can study together or something."

"Really?" she asked excitedly as she turned back to him. "You'd do that for me?"

"Like Buttinsky here said, a nice person asks for a favor and maybe I should consider helping. I'm Travis, by the way."

"Kaitlyn."

"How do you wanna do this?"

"Uh," she stumbled as she hadn't thought things through in advance, "Uh, maybe we could meet at the library..."

"Nah, they don't want any talking there. How about we meet at your place?"

"Nope, sorority and they only allow guys there for a few hours on certain days of the week. How about here? I'll treat you to a coke and we can sit over at one of the booths."

"Sounds good. Say, tomorrow evening around six?"

"Yeah, sounds great. See you then, Travis. And thank you."

"Sure. See you then."

On the way back to her table, Kaitlyn was secretly thrilled. He seemed like a nice guy; pleasant and not at all bad looking up-close. But then a wave of despair swept over her. If he was so nice, how would she be able to dump him simply because of her sorority's April Fools' joke? She didn't have time to think about it too much as the girls at her table wanted to know all about him.

"I'm going to do some studying with the tall one and we'll see how that goes."

"Good! I knew you could do it."

"And remember, you've gotta dump him in a month on the first."

"Yeah, I know already," she responded glumly, "I know."

-----

With her heart pounding double time and her stomach filled with anxiety, she climbed the step to the SU at six the next evening. Over in one corner she could see Travis along with the other two guys who were at the table the day before. She wondered what was going on but was determined to follow through with the plan.

"Hi, Travis."

"Hey, Kaitlyn, here, have a seat. These two losers were just getting ready to leave."

"Oh, they don't have to go. We, uh, we can still study with them here."

"Are you kidding? Neither of them knows anything about chemistry and they were getting ready to leave. Oh, and this is Sammy," he said as he pointed to the Asian guy, "And he's in biomedical engineering and this is Gord. He's doing computer sciences."

"Uh, Hi. What's biomedical engineering, anyway?"

"That's where we use robotics and AI to design things to help people with medical and physical disabilities," he answered with a pleasant-sounding voice, "You know, design artificial limbs and lots of other things. They're even working on reading brain waves to make limbs work for paralyzed people."

"Cool. What about you, Gord? And what kind of name is Gord, anyway?"

The heavy-set fellow smiled politely and told her his real name was Gordon but everyone called him Gord.

"What he won't tell you is his online name is Lord Gord and he's feared and respected all over the gaming world."

"Yeah," added Travis, "And he's designed two best-selling games and has a ton of money to show for it."

"Then what are you doing going to school?"

"Gord laughed and replied, "Gotta have something to do during the day. Most gaming sessions are at night. And I know I won't be a gamer forever so I figure I better broaden my skills now while I can."

Kaitlyn was amazed. These guys were truly interesting and were clearly smart. "What about you, Travis? What's your major?"

"Pre-med. I was also going for computer science and had to take a 'soft' science elective last year. I took bio and loved it and decided to do something along those lines. That's why I'm in first year chem even though I'm a sophomore."

"I'm pre-med, too. I bet we'll have lots of classes together."

"Look, we're gonna leave you two now. And remember, Travis, your coach turns into a pumpkin at midnight," laughed Sammy.

"I'll be back well before then."

A few seconds later, Kaitlyn spoke up. "They're neat guys."

"Yeah. My roomies, too."

"Oh? Where?"

"Sammy and I live in Gord's house over on Wren Lane."

"He's got a house?"

"Yeah. He's actually loaded from those games he designed and owns the house. We each rent a room from him but he's not charging us what he should. Nice guy."

"Sounds like it."

"So, should we get started?"

The next ninety minutes flew by. Kaitlyn was already doing well in the class but reviewing the information with another student helped her understand it much better. She figured she'd ace the next exam without any trouble and from what Travis was saying, she knew he'd do well, also.

"Wow, this has been truly helpful. Thanks."

"Honestly, Kaitlyn, I think you already had a pretty good grasp on things."

"Well, maybe, but you really helped me be sure. And I owe you a coke."

He laughed out loud. "An hour and a half of my time and I get a coke? At that rate I'll be a millionaire by the year 3025."

"Oh, you stinker. You know what I mean. I wanted to give a little thank you something."

"That's not needed. It was fun and I'd be willing to do this again."

Kaitlyn was ecstatic. Here he had shown interest in spending more time with her and he was a truly nice guy. But she remembered: she'd have to dump him!

"Er, maybe next week?"

"Uh, we have our midterm test Friday. How about Thursday?" He was smiling at her and she realized he must like her at least a little bit.

"OK, here, six?"

"Sure. We can finish the chapters together before the exam."

"Great. See you then."

"Can I escort you back to your place?"

"Thanks, but it's the Chi house across the street. I'm good."

"Your sorority, huh? Somehow you don't seem like the sorority type. You're too nice."

"Hey, some of my sisters are good people," she protested with more vigor than she felt.

"Oh, I'm sure. Anyway, until Thursday, then. And you'll owe me two cokes when we're done."

With his laughter still echoing in her mind, she went up the stairs to her house. In the foyer she met the president, Shelly. "Well, how did it go? Have you set the hook yet?"

"We're getting together again in two days."

"Great! Don't forget to move things along. The clock is ticking."

"Yeah, I know," she muttered as she began to climb the stairs.

-----

Two nights later they met again. If the first study session had been good, or even great, this second one was fabulous. They talked chemistry for fifty minutes or so before getting sidetracked talking about their university life and themselves.

She realized he was an interesting guy. He had gone to a small high school in a rural community and had done well enough he was able to get some scholarships for the university. After his freshman year he had gone back to help his uncle on the family farm bucking hay and doing a lot of physical labor. 'That's where he gets his muscles,' she thought to herself. He seemed genuinely proud of his background, didn't hide his roots and admitted to working out in the gym a few times a week, "Just to keep in shape for this summer."

She told him about her lonely childhood and how she enjoyed meeting other students. "The sorority has been a good place for me to meet some girls."

"Hmm. I've heard some of them can be real, uh, rhymes with riches."

"Oh, you're right, some of them are but you can find people like that everywhere."

"As long as you like it and they're nice to you, I guess it's OK."

"No, it's great," she lied as her mind played over and over how she was expected to seduce and dump him. "Uh, Travis, I've got a little headache and I'd better go."

"Oh, sorry to hear it. Get some rest and I'll see you tomorrow in chemistry. And let me see you home if you're not feeling well."

"Thanks." He walked next to her and when they reached the door, she thanked him before rushing into the house. The last thing she wanted was for her sisters to see him.

-----

The exam was a snap and she realized their studying together had helped. She decided she wanted to continue the sessions through the following week. As they filed out of the lecture hall, she purposefully 'bumped' into Travis.

"How'd it go?"

"Great. You know, Kaitlyn, even though I understood things pretty well, talking with you about them made a big difference."

"Want to keep doing it?"

"The sessions? Yeah! Maybe we can plan for each Tuesday and Thursday evening."

"Sounds good. Same place and time Tuesday. OK?"

"Sure."

"Ah, how about sooner? Want to get together maybe this weekend?" she asked.

"To study? I'm pretty studied out."

"No, uh, how about getting together for a little fun? Like a movie or something."

"Like a date? Are you asking me out on a date?" he asked.

"Kinda, I guess."

"I'll have to turn in my man-card. I'm supposed to ask you."

"Well, I'm waiting."

"Kaitlyn, would you like to go out with me this weekend?"

"Yeah, that'd be fun. Here's my number. Why don't you text me tomorrow morning and tell me what you're thinking about?"