All Comments on 'Karma Killer'

This was fantastic. His mindset so resonated with me, as did her sacrifice. Well done!

Great idea, but waaaaaaaaaaaaay too wordy. At least three pages longer than necessary.

Creative concept. Her final sacrifice was quite moving. But there is no way he wad her soulmate or vice versa. She clearly had her own delusions and he battled severe depression and hid it from. A six week affair, culminating in a full week f$ckfest in another city? She has no reasons beyond her need for spontaneity and that she just wanted a vacation from their marriage. Of course she it with a stick of dynamite and a blowtorch. Ultimately she died with another man's penis in her mouth while driving home. Whatever. The psychological part about his depression was quite well done, but before her spiritual sacrifice, her dialog is left wanting and is contradictory. Her statements prior to her sacrifice, ring hollow. Having a week long f$ck party with your affair partner in a honeymoon suite does not signal the end of your brief affair. Nor does having his penis in your mouth as your f$ck vacation comes to an end. While the rules included no lying, clearly self delusion was allowed. While elements of the story were interesting and creative, she came off as execrable and ignoble before her ultimate sacrifice. Closure through spiritual cleansing and her sacrifice is nice and all, but before that her dialog and reasoning was highly contradictory and showed quite a bit of self delusion or dissembling on her part. 4 stars due to the huge discrepancy between the psychological drama and her vapid explanations or lame excuses.

Excellent core concept. I don't know enough about "real" depression to say if it can be overcome by the outpouring of love described herein, but I know that the relatively mild depressive thoughts I sometimes get would be. Well done.

Agree with Anonymous from 3 months ago the psychological part was done well. 5 stars

Yawn

So the story was VERY creative!! Well done in that respect. Some grammar and spelling issues hindered the flow of thought a wee bit. But the line of thinking involving such a deep dive inside one's own psyche would be daunting for myself so I respect your effort! 5 stars and a big thank you!

That he couldn't lie. But clearly SHE could. "The affair went on for six weeks". And then later, "The opportunity came up, and I spontaneously decided to take a week off from our marriage". Which is it? A week, or six weeks? No wonder she did it. She's clearly a narcissist, and an easy liar. So good a liar, in fact, that she is able to lie, in a place where you can't lie, apparently.

You can't claim to love someone and then spend a week letting some other guy leave lovebites all over your body. You can't tell someone that you love only them with all your heart, and then die in a car crash while sucking another man's cock.

Far too inconsistent even by the rules you yourself set up in this fictional universe.

Her outpouring of "love" at the end is in direct contradiction with her earlier statement of "I didn't give you a second thought, some strange cock was available and I took it, for a whole week. Even died sucking his cock"

As someone with members of family with depression, I can assure you that his "decision" at the end only leads one direction, and that's the sound of air whistling through a brain hole. A hole that deep can't be filled in with meaningless platitudes.

Dark and depressing is quite an understatement, but it was very deep analyzation of the human psyche. there was much too much of this depressing ramblings. It got to the point where I wanted him to just shoot himself and be done with this. Then, upon further reading and skimming of this long suffering diatribe, I wanted to shoot myself. However the last page was poignant and worthwhile leaving me with a warm feeling ( even knowing it was going to end up this way. The story, I believe, could have been much better if it was shorter in length...making it a bit less depressing. I still gave it a 4.

The dead and dreary parts were a real downer, dreary as hell -but- I've never lived or thought anything remotely like it.

Maybe it took Ruby meshing with his soul at the last instant but good for them! I see them as one and the story as a rather convoluted 4.......

Again we don’t know why anyone would bother to write a story like this??? Deep and dark and terribly depressing!!! This author is so very capable of writing interesting stories why did he waste his time with this and then pass it on for a reader to waste theirs!!!

I found the stories idea and premise to be pretty incredible, but there is the problem if she truly was that in love with him and full of light and goodness she never would have cheated, it doesn't work that way. Cheating is so evil it's in the commandments TWICE once for even thinking it, and once for doing it, so no I can't believe amongst all the unbelievable things in the story that is possible. Cheaters are evil and go to hell, and so do self deleters. Also you don't have to be a self-hating suffering from depression all your life to be driven to self-delete over a loss like in this story "funny how you quoted Robin Williams in this story as he self-deleted over issues with his new wife." So yeah cheating happens for reasons and to say that a good person could do it without one is just wrong. That's only how self-entitled narcissistic feminists justify their cheating so they can go on thinking they are a good person, to himself the devil thought he was right to.

Sorry, too dark for me and I’ve experienced some of it. I couldn’t finish it. 1*

Brilliant writing on a very dark story. You brought it up considerably at the end. It was one hell of a read.

Revisit after a year, which coincidentally was the worst 12 months of my life, my mental health is the worst its been.

Apart from the relationship aspect of this fantastic story, the mental health depictions are just the sort of crap floating round my head.

Sadly for you story writers, I did have a serious medical event last year, was reported no signs of life, and given CPR by an absolute stranger, however, I remember nothing from over an hour before or two days after. No angels no tunnel no rainbow bridge.

To the person who showed they know nothing about firearms, the hammer is the part of the mechanism which drops onto the firing pin of a firearm, just because you can't see it, it's still there.

Unfortunately the characters inner image should of himself is almost a copy of my own, minus having even a semblance of a life and most definitely minus any glimpse of love or companionship. I can admit that I do often fall victim to the trap of hope from time to time but I realize the the entirety of existence is a stress to destruction test in all ways : physical, mental, emotional, etc... a literal march from the cradle to the grave with no way out but death and I'd bet reincarnation is real as well n "lather rinse repeat" different beach same sunburn. To quote a song "whatever, never mind"

Glocks don’t have hammers

The psychological part was done well. Clearly Ruby was not happy. Craving spontaneity doesn't lead you to a hotl room for a week f'cking a coworker and blowing in the car on the way home. She had not thought for the future. She even admits that even had she lived, accident or not, her guilt would have overwhelmed her and she woukd have confessed or blow it by acting weird trying to make up for her sure and getting caught. And knowing he had a dark side (though not to what extent), and what she meant to him, it woukd have driven him to thr same exact place: with a gun to his head pulling the trigger. Her choice for spontaneity and lust murdered not just herself and her one-week lover but also her husband. If she had lived, she still would have murdered her husband. The last 1.5 pages is quite interesting with the deep dive into his soul and the gift she gave him of how she saw him, both perfect and imperfect. So at least he knows she really did love him and that allows him to move on. Not just as we odds but her actual feelings and thoughts. And she made a sacrifice to save him. But again she was ultimately responsible for him pulling the trigger. Then again his "dark" demeanor was probably something that made her unfulfilled in her marriage with him at a subconscious level. She can't confess to that under the local rules, because her conscious mind had no knowledge of this possibility. But she probably felt like something.ething was missing, that they were not connecting as they should, that he seemed withdrawn and too rigid, and she obviously had her own variety of mental health issues. Of course how she acted on her discomfort and her being ill at ease, without even knowing it, was reprehensible and out him in that position given his mental illness. It is just sad. At least he gets a new lease on life. And while Ruby in the after life truly believed he was better without her, her gift shows that to be incorrect, but her sacrifice does save him. Still due to their own respective mental issues (her compartmentalization is stunning and does not bide well) and poor communication while married, this marriage was doomed. He being clinically depressed and felling unloved except by her but with the thread always in danger of being cut, and her with her inability to be faithful, and by when she goes "spontaneous" she really cuts loose. No husband in their right mind would take her back with her week along f$ckfest and her distorted rationale. Ergo he would have died either way. Only by her dying first and sacrificing herself does he find any peace at all.

I usually read authors and wonder how they can come up with the spark that creates a story and then using their talent and drive, they punch out a piece of work that gets pre read and edited and fixed and read again until they have their story but you completely blew me away with what you created. To me this is on an entire different level than so much of the stuff a normally read and the emotions you pulled out of me truly surprised the hell out of me. This piece of literature pulled me from one end of my belief system to the other which I can honestly say that it was unexpected and never happened before. You made me question things while looking at other things that should have confused me completely and yet your words somehow allowed things to stay in their proper place without becoming a jumbled mess. I generally do not get surprised by a story and if I do, this never this deep but to write something that forces a reader to look at their belief system is amazing. I could go on and on but I would rather read this again and spend some serious time thinking about what I thought was set in stone. Thank you for somehow pulling the parts of a story from the ether and having it all come together in such a beautiful way.

GG/LG

wow

A deep one, this. Needs thinking and inward contemplating.

Wow you described it very well.

Except the pain, the constant mental pain, its the best I can relate it. You didn't mention it.

I've suffered from deep clinical depression for 20 years now. So many medications and hospitals and failed social interactions in thees 30 years of life. You got all the feelings of hopelessness, and all the self-recriminations, and lack of self-worth shockingly right. Im insanely curious as to how you can know what it feels like to such a spot-on degree?

The loneliness is so deep it's a physical pain so I couldn't help feeling a great deal of hatred towards Ruby in the beginning. I hope I can find a woman who makes this life worth something and if she betrayed me I don't think I'd be able to take it. But to finally be rid of this inner darkness would allow for a life to be truly lived, experienced. and enjoyed--and that's what she did for him as her final act.

She set him free.

“Brevity is the soul of lingerie” said Dorothy Parker. Magnificent story here in all regards but that

A re-read for me. Still exceptional work.

I unfortuantely can relate.

I describe it more of a constant pain. But at least back in the day a longing to. Until i finally realized i was different and others were, others.

Sometime i still feel better seeing others with their friends. Until i remember i will never have any.

Still good read.

Dont buy wifes thoughts. She was so obviously like others and used him. Not really caring that much.

A good description of depression. Unsuprisingly it was the most depressing story I've read.

Bingo!

OMG. One of the best stories on the site.

5 stars.

Nice to read a unique story, rather than the cookie cutter clones spewed out in their hundreds each day.

Well done.

When you say it's not autobiographical, does that mean you actually pulled the trigger????

can't imagine what's its like to be loved by a hoe, i'd prefer a good woman

[17.07.23]

To quote one Joey Lawrence - "Woah!"

Intense monologuing and dialoguing, well done!

Some nice humour via Douglas Noel Adams:

[There was an almost companionable silence for a minute or two. I mean, it was an utterly preposterous situation, so why not a companionable silence? In the words of Ford Prefect, "Why not go mad?"]

Some acerbic-ness via Clint Eastwood:

[I shrugged. As Clint Eastwood's character in the 'Unforgiven' movie once said, "Deserve ain't got nothin' to do with it."]

And that ending...holee chit!

As a man who was married to a manic-depressive wife (who died 6 years ago and this being our 32 wedding anniversary) THIS HIT HARD!

The denouement and wrap-up:

[Turning on the radio, it was playing "Sacrifice", but Elton John. I couldn't help but grin at the appropriateness.

"Thank you, Ruby. I'll never forget you", I murmured into the sky as I drove with the windows down, wondering what would come next.]

11/10!!!!!

Oh, one other original thing about this story. Again, unlike the stupid formulaic "oh I love her so much, I can't live without her", the author does build a reasonably believable (especially to people who have similar minds to main character, even a little) valid reason to end their life. Not some mythical "pain from love lost", but an actual reason.

* "give this story 15 points". Wish comments could be edited here.

Wow. So far this is the only story in this even that was actually great (among a few tolerable and many bad, even from authors I usually like).

/

First, it's almost impossible to believe in a need for reconciliation, because actions speak louder than words. Cheating is the ultimate trump card, nearly 100% proving by action that the person who claims to love you, truly does NOT, for they chose their benefit over a risk/fact of your pain, unhappiness, and damage. There's nothing a cheater can say that could even remotely disprove the obvious revealed preference that they don't love you. This is why I always harshly judge any kind of reconciliation stories (especially RAAC), because they are evil in their immorality and unethicalness. The author forces the main character to be evilly subjected to the cheater's malign presence. Even if the cheater isn't actively evil, the very fact that the victim is forced to sacrifice being actually loved, for being with someone who proved they don't actually love them, beyond a shadow of a doubt.

/

Except ONE rare exception. When the cheater commit another act, a selfless sacrifice, to prove the opposite. One that has at least as much beneficial magnitude on your side and sacrifice on theirs, as the cheating had.

/

As such, this is one of the very very few stories where the author chose to make this happen, and - even better - made it into entertaining, moving, and interesting and unusual work. Usually it's a more cliched "spouse jumps in front of a bullet to save the cheating victim" - which is a valid case for forgiving a cheater but a bit too predictable and formulaic.

/

As such, I wish I could give this story 5 points. 5 for general quality. 10 for a rare and masterful setting up a believable. moral, ethical and rational forgiveness/reconciliation, where main character clearly benefitted and won by the explicit choice and action of his partner who cheated.

Came across this one by pure chance.

You surely have talent, extra ordinary insight into matters that affect people living with this condition.

Thank you!

You mentioned this was not biographical, in any way, so where did extensive dialogue about depression and thoughts of suicide come from? It was difficult reading, as attested to by commenter dirtyoldbiman. I feel after reading it I should have done what he did, read the first page and skip to the end. I feel you spent way to much ink and philosophical meanderings of trying to do ????? I don't know. The only thing mildly entertaining was his ethereal visit with his wife while contemplating suicide. I'm afraid the only thing I got out of this story was that I have been mildly depressed my whole life and I'm 80, but, I have never had thoughts of suicide. I guess we were warned in your introduction or disclaimer at the beginning as it were but I was hoping for more.............. Here are a few sentences that just didn't read right: Protective measures were learned and ingrained, to avoid having excruciation

And at their age, I would well understand it.

I once tried to explain it to someone was it like a bridge between peaks and troughs of the waves that are depression.

Long winded way of saying I had put her on a pedestal, and when she fell off it the entire world with her.

I just sat there, miserable as I had ever been, knowing that I this was it.

Too deep or weird for me and I only read page 1, then page 5 to see what happened.

Very very good, you describe depression quite well, not in everyone’s experience but in a lot of cases I’m sure, mine included, I rise every day and put a mask on, not a paper or cloth mask but just a good old mask to hide the world from looking or seeing things that would hurt me and them if I let it slip.

I did think you over wrote it somewhat, just to many words saying the same things, but overall I liked it, I liked the plot line it was that bit different,

Glock 20 is a 10 MM, not a .45

Excellent work. Really getting the self loathing, describes my head.

"Well, fairly obviously, I was having an affair. I mean, that much is obvious. It hadn't been going on long. Only six weeks,"

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"He was there, it was offered, I took it. I didn't think about repercussions. We honestly were supposed to be at a course, but it was canceled at the last minute. Jason just said, 'Wanna go and be naughty for a week?' I just said 'Yes'."

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Confused here... six weeks or one week...? Not saying one is any better than the other but "weeks" kind of makes a lie of the "we just decided to fuck for a week", implying the whole *thing* was spontaneous rather than ongoing.

Lets be honest, if she really felt that way about him she never could have cheated in the first place

Holy fuck. 5/5. This sums up my life minus the gun. Surreal self reflection

Nato_

The cynic in me wants to say that when she poured all that love into Olly it was what she felt for Jason. But I can’t this was too well written to try to denigrate with factious jibes.

A 5* story if ever there was one.

How did I miss this when it was posted just weeks ago?

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Just an awesome bit of writing. Unlike some commenters, I didn’t think it was too verbose at all. A deep dive into the mental chaos that was Oliver and that produced his almost congenital depression required a thorough examination. Which was the whole point of the plot.

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Very inventive way to get Oliver and Ruby together post infidelity — she’s dead and he’s a millisecond from a self inflicted death himself. Obviously “the greater Power” arranged the meeting. One commenter alluded to “What Dreams May Come” — that analogy fit pretty well.

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I’d like to think that Ruby’s action to “take away” Oliver’s depressive traits was her own path to redemption that “the greater Power” gave her 😎. And obviously, the story ended with Oliver cleansed of his personal demons.

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Easy 5 *****

Wowwwww

Masterpiece of creative writing

Something more valuable than the ratings and this forum too...

Story is just the disguise

Thoughts ....deeper, darker and soul searching.... emotional with positive solutions

Rated 5* (forum maxed out)

I thought it was an amazing story. It was so creative and your descriptions of depression were spot on. This will be on of my favorites. I would have given more that 5 stars if I could. It’s so good to have you back writing, you’re one of my writers.

Wow you understand.

Great writing.

And you got it right. You can't let people know much, the would dislike you even more.

An amazing piece! The depths you went in describing his depression had to have come from your heart and experiences, whether personal or studied. Definitely pulled on my heartstrings. 10*

Not autobiographical? I find it hard to believe you could so accurately describe the emptiness I feel, the fundamental knowledge that I don't matter in any way to a universe so vast, without having experienced some part of it yourself. Unfortunately for me, there is no light to fill my void and nothing means enough to me to lead to suicide. I just live my life, moment by moment, in the certainty that I am mortal and my time will end.

Talk about depression... Sheesh!

An interesting idea, but bit too much navel gazing for me.

Some kind powerful. Entrancing story and interesting thought line. She still didn't love him in the way you presented. You just can't do that if you really do love someone. Love doesn't fail, and it doesn't take time outs. Even if no one ever knew, she still made the decision. She was selfish. Really enjoyed it, thanks.

Very interesting. When I was 13 or 14 years old in a church youth class our minister told us all that the purpose of life was 'to live'. Great story. Interesting perspective.

I don't usually like stories with suicide in them. I've known and seen the aftermath it causes to the ones left behind. This was different because it dealt with the split seconds before the end and the backing away from the eternal end, the final act. I have often wondered what their final thoughts were. It was hard to read because of my feelings about suicide. I gave it 4-stars.

very creative. what a change from the usual here. 5

Strange one.

The time now being close to Christmas,

why not make Santa Claus arrange their meeting?

Oh well, a chance missed there.

The plot didn't do much for me.

Too down to earth.

But what stands out for me

is a pretty impressive description of depression.

Thankfully I'm not an expert on the subject,

but I've known people with such a problem.

It looks like the writer knows such people too.

The writing about it was very powerful!

And earns 4 out of 5 from me.

Anyone capable of that level f love wouldnt be capable of cheating in the first place

Sometimes I wish I weren't "that guy" but I am. It's a 10mm not a .45. You obviously worked hard on this story and it shows. I'm a Jezzaz fan, just not a fan of this story. Catch you next time.

Wow. I don't know if I like it and it is awfully verbose in Oliver's long explanation of his internal depression, but still amazingly creative. 5*****

Mate you had me crying at the end. Good story.

Good idea!!

Interesting story, I finished it....but the writer Jezzaz is out of practice, lost your writer's edge.

Gave you 3 ⭐️s.

Thanks for the effort, I'm

*

*

*

*

AMerryman

From the comments below, I guess you're not a gun guy. It's ok! The story isn't about Glock handguns. It's deeply engrossing and unique interaction with a deceased spouse who cheated. Hugely creative! So is Ruby inside him and still able to communicate in some way? I'm picturing this scenario with her cheating partner sitting in for at least part of the conversation. No idea where that would go!

The theme and the message was powerful. I suspect that any reader who had any similarities to Olly would be drawn in. The details about the pistol were messed up. If the reader could ignore those details because they weren’t necessary to the story,this was a good story.

This story literally gave me a headache. 2 pages of solo dialogue.

Love story? with too much gobble gook.

I like this author a lot, but I skimmed probably 80% of this story

Well that's bull shit-

Women don't do a thing without planing.

So when they are cheating, it is always a deliberate act

Powerful, original story that got me quite emotional, despite not initially identifying with either character. 5 stars!

For future reference - The Glock 21, Glock 30, Glock 36, and Glock 41 are the major variants that are chambered for the .45 ACP.

Great take on this. People quite often have the imposter syndrome, and we all function nonetheless. I would hope that Ruby gets a reward, since clearly she was there for a purpose. We all match in different ways: the cold analytical types with the bright bubbly rays of sunshine balancing it all out, if we are lucky. Ruby’s explanation for her tryst is on the mark: often it is not a conscious betrayal, but nothing more than a spontaneous “what the heck” action. So many stories have the lame “it meant nothing” explanation, shot to pieces by the betrayed spouse. People are complicated and almost never make even big momentous choices with perfect self reflection.

Hmmm, hard to come to a score for this, but it doesnt really matter. What does is that your effort to convey depression, and pure love (and the peace it brings) was well done. A little wordy in the middle, a bit boggy, but slogging thru to last page was worth it.

How to react? Possibly a couple of re-reads could do the trick!

I am definitely not going to let the routine but brief 'loving wife' dialogues overshadow the deep mental anguish Jezzaz was able to project. The smalls and capitals were thought provoking.

It would take some time to process.

I was a bit confused regarding the number of siblings. 5 or 6?

5.

Holy shit - powerful! 5*

By God, man! You’ve really nailed the horror of living with the void. By the time I reached the last page I was stripped raw. You’d given voice to those lifelong demons and made sense of them.

I’m glad Oliver found his light within himself - that’s where it has to come from (even if here it’s in the guise of Ruby) - and hope that he, and any readers with whom this story particularly resonates, gets to hold on to that. It is a never-ending battle. Much as we hope, the void never truly departs and will take root again in the faintest of cracks.

Thank you for this reminder that there is hope.

Dark but good!

5

A unique premise, thought provoking and expertly crafted. The dialog (both internal and between the couple) was absolutely compelling.

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Oh, and the reason his gun misfired? The Glock 20 is a 10mm, not .45. :-) /sbrooks

Very inventive.

Brings to mind the lyrics from Paul Simon’s ‘Slip Slidin Away’:

.

I know a man

He came from my home town

He wore his passion for his woman

Like a thorny crown

He said Delores

I live in fear

My love for you's so overpowering

I'm afraid that I will disappear

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What a horrible state in which Oliver exists. What a burden he suffers, and by implication, does Ruby unwittingly also bare.

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A profoundly affecting piece of storytelling. I’ll reread ‘Karma Killer’ later, and consider it again for quite a while. Touché. A very fine piece of writing. Thank you.

Awesome story. 5 stars.

yuck

Wow! Powerful! Deep. It certainly made me reflect. I truly appreciate good writing that draws you in, keeps you reading, and can't put down. Outstanding! But, also... Thank You.

Definitely a 6! I had a nice review and praise all written out as anonymous and when I signed it, it disappeared. So well written and descriptive of myself in many ways. AimsAtSkies called it right: visceral. Hits you right in the gut! Well done and please keep up the good work.

Very interesting and well-written story.

I'll admit to being conflicted. I find Ruby's actions and her selfless act to be greatly at odds and difficult to reconcile. Can the unforgivable be redeemed? I'm not sure.

This is my punishment. I have to sit here and listen to this whore yap.

That Was Freaking Excellent!

Possibly the best thing I've read in the past few months. Not, as you warn us, a happy story but i actually enjoyed the journey this one took us on. Definitely a heavy read, but a very good one. Thanks.

Squaring the circle. You juggled with words and drew and erased feelings and yet you tried to make it clear to us that nothing justifies suicide and everything just needs love to work! Excellently done and yet for me it remains the squaring of the circle! 5*!

I loved the story. So deep and self-analytical for me. It was cathartic but also emotional and tragic for me. I am 90% Oliver. I felt his tears, his pain, and mine too. But unfortunately I've never found that real love. I just keep functioning. I'm glad Oliver found his way back from the darkness.

Too painful for me - too close to reality! But it was an amazing story and really doesn't fit normal categories of Literotica. However, everyone should read this story and understand there are millions of men in the world who live in this black/white, right/wrong, personal sense of the right way to behave and it often cripples them, especially in social environments. Thank you for writing this even if I did have tears in my eyes through most of the story

Just incredible. Totally original and I had no idea how it was going to finish. I did struggle with the dialogue at times, and felt the depressive monologue went on far too long, but I kept with it and was really worth the long haul. The depressive monologe was an important piece of context that had to be said. I can see that this plot is going to be staying with me for a few days, which is the mark of an excellent story. I might even come back and read it again. Thank you so much. 5-stars.

A glock 20 is a 10mm pistol

Gripping and dark. 5 stars. Don’t understand affair(s?) in light of the passionate love she felt. And covered in hickeys at the end of the week? How would she have explained?

One inconsistency: Ruby says the affair went on for six weeks, but tries to pass off the week in Madison as a spur-of-the-moment one-off. I would have fixed that, and condensed Oliver's navel-gazing.

The question which should occur to Oliver at the end (since we're believing impossible things, as the red queen would say) is this: If it were possible to go back before Ruby cheated and have it not happen, would he choose that? Or would he choose his new life without her?

So very talented! Unique and thought provoking. Thank you!

Hey, just thought I'd mention this; it was not my intention to run into the Invitational event on LitErotica this week. It is complete coincidence that this story was published on this day. It should actually have been the day before, but I accidentally uploaded a version that still had editor comments in it, and the Lit Moderators caught it and asked me to re-upload it.

The fact that the content could be considered in line with the Invitational thesis was also a weird coincidence.

There's nothing as weird as the Truth.

Yes, Ryans ending is coming. I'm elbow deep in it now, had another idea to add to it today in fact.

While the story may not be autobiographical in any way, the author clearly has some familiarity with depression. Nobody knows what is really going on inside our heads; what our internal discussions sound like or why we make the decisions we do. Interesting angle for a cheating wife story.

A WASTE OF TIME from a formerly acceptable author....

First paragraph threw me out of the story... Glock 20... is a 10mm. The slide moves back, there is no stock. There is no hammer, there is a striker. I'll give you shell but cartridge would be more precise. Sorry to be pedantic, just threw me completely out of the story before it started.