Katherine

I'd heard the bell ring at the door, but I'd ignored it. My father had guests all the time, they had nothing to do with me. Instead I turned to get better light as I sketched in my notebook. I knew I should have been up and dressed already, out of the house walking perhaps. I hadn't felt like it, it was too dreary of a day and I wanted to stay in my room, in bed, curled up with my sketches and my imagination. It was a day for imagining.

"Katherine!" my mother called at the door, knocking. "Katherine!"

"What?" I asked, shading the side of a tree.

My mother came in, then covered her mouth in surprise. "Kath! Get up, hurry! Get dressed! Quickly now, your father is waiting on you! And a guest! Get up! Your lovely blue dress, Kath, it sets of your skin so. Come on! Get up!"

"What guest?" I asked, frowning up at her as she hurriedly pulled my clothes out.

"Get up, Kath!"

I huffed and got up, letting her dress me and hurriedly put my hair up. "Why the secrecy?" I demanded. "Is it cousin Ellen? Cousin Franklin?"

"Just hurry up!" my mother demanded, then rushed out. She was probably going to see about the guest.

I let out another sigh and gave my sketchbook a longing look before going down to entertain whatever business associate my father was trying to impress.

I had never seen the man before, but he didn't look like my fathers typical associate. He was tall and slender and at least as old as my father, perhaps older. He was dressed like a gentleman and not another farmer. A banker perhaps? I was sure my father did not owe money, the farm was doing well!

"Miss Katherine," the man nodded as he stood.

"Katherine, this is Lord Ellincort," my father announced, also standing. "Lord Ellingcort, my daughter, Katherine."

The man stepped closer and took my hand, bowing to kiss my fingers. Confused, I jerked my hand away and looked at my father. "You needed me, papa?" I asked, my stomach turning sick.

"Come and sit down, Katherine," my father frowned as the man gave him an offended look. "Lord Ellingcort has come to see you."

"About?" I demanded, sitting close to my father so I could see the man across from us.

"Katherine!" my mother hissed. "Your manners, please! I'm so sorry, Lord Ellincort, she had a sleepless night and a headache this morning. She was still abed."

"Is she sickly? I was given to think she was not only hale, but also of age?"

"She is, my lord, very hale. And she is nineteen. Her size runs in my husband's family," my mother assured him.

"What's this about?" I demanded, not liking where I was sure this was going.

"Lord Ellingcort met your uncle Jules in the city and he was told about you. He wanted to meet you for himself," my father spoke coaxingly.

"Why?" I demanded angrily, ready to flee back to my room.

"Your uncle told me much about you," the man said more gently. "Told me about your love of art and your... free spirit. I had mentioned I was tired of all of the ladies surrounding me, thinking a widowed man must be in want of a new wife of high social stature. I, in fact, do not. My first wife was a cold woman and I do not wish another like her. Instead I would prefer someone who is... less... grasping. You uncle told me about you and I admit, he painted quite the picture. Enough that I came all this way to meet you."

"Well, you wasted your time. I don't care about your money or your title! I have no interest in..."

"Katherine!" Father scolded in a hiss.

"Please excuse her, she is in a foul temper because of the pain she is in," my mother apologized for me to the man. "Her head is hurting her so. Katherine, please. Do as your father bids you and be more gracious."

I looked at my father and he looked mortified. I felt myself blushing as I sat up and looked down, giving the man a single nod.

"Perhaps a walk would help," the man offered, standing. "Fresh air."

He offered his hand and I glanced at my father. His look said it all. I allowed the man to help me stand, then took his offered arm as he led me outside. The sky was overcast, the wind chilling, but my face was hot.

"Your uncle... I thought he might be exaggerating when he said you were stunning. I am pleased to see he was not," the man offered.

"Thank you," I murmured, wishing I could kick his shin and run.

"Are you reticent because I am so much older, Katherine?"

I looked away, looking out at the fields. "The rain that's coming, the corn surely needs it. The sow there, she is almost ready to throw her litter. Have you ever seen a baby piglet?"

"I... no, Miss Katherine, I cannot say that I have."

"I grew up here, Lord Ellingcort."

"You may call me Gabriel."

"I grew up here, on this farm. It's all I know, really. My mother tries to pretend I am more, putting me in fine dresses and taking me to social gatherings in town. But it's all a sham. My father is still only a farmer, even if he is a well to do farmer."

"I obviously know that and do not mind it," he smiled gently.

"Let us be frank, Sir. I cannot say no to you and you know it. My father can say yes for me and it will be done, regardless of my wishes. So please know that I do not wish this. Take my feelings into account and walk away."

"I understand I am not quite what you imagined in a husband, Katherine, but I think you could come to care for me. I can care for you, protect you. I will see you dressed in fine clothes with fine gifts and parties. You will have your own art studio if you wish, my manor is expansive, the estates as well. You will have free run of the house and servants and..."

"Lord Ellingcort, I have told you how I feel. I have no want of... a man your age."

"I am still in my prime! I can still father a great many children, and..."

"You are old enough to be my father. Let us not mince words, Sir. I do not care for you at all, not your looks, not your money, not your age. Nothing about you appeals to me. Go find yourself another farm girl or wherever it is you want!"

The man drew up, then gave a curt nod. "As you wish, Miss Katherine," he nodded sadly, sounding hurt. "I hope you have a pleasant day then."

I gave him another nod, then turned to go to the barn as he went back inside. That had been horrifying! Worse than! What was my father thinking, introducing an old man like that and expecting me to say yes! The man didn't even know me at all! How could he possibly want me as a wife? It was all idiotic.

I stayed gone from the house until that evening, not wanting to hear my mothers complaining or my fathers anger. I knew my mother would be the worst, her disappointment for me letting a man of wealth slip through my fingers. I couldn't convince her that was her dream and not mine.

If I married, he would be young, handsome and brave. He would sweep me off my feet like the men in the stories and kiss me in the moonlight as he convinced me to run off with him and marry him in secret!

I was smiling wistfully at the fantasy I had conjured up when I slipped into the kitchen. My mother was there, of course.

"There you are! Where've you been? Your father has been looking for you all day! Go and clean up! We have you all packed and ready for the morning!"

"Packed?" I asked, confused.

"For the trip!"

"The trip?"

"To your new home, after you're married in the morning. Your father has made all of the arrangements with Lord Ellingcort, we will meet him at the church at 10. From there, you will leave to go back to the city with him! Come on, I have a bath ready for you, though it has likely cooled some by now."

I was stunned. He had gone back in and arranged the marriage anyway? No! No, this wasn't fair! I thought he left and left me alone!

I sat numbly through the bath as my mother scrubbed me and talked at me, telling me all about the wedding and what I would need to say and do. I felt like it was happening to someone else.

Even as I got in bed that night, I felt like it couldn't be real.

No. It WOULDN'T be real.

I slipped out of bed and got dressed quietly, then grabbed my already packed bag and went down to pack food, then slipped out to the barn. Saddling Clara, I slipped away from the farm, riding away from the town, away from the city. They couldn't force me to marry anyone! Especially not an old man with no fire in his heart and no imagination! He was dull as week old oatmeal!

When morning came, I slipped into the woods and slept curled up against a tree, waiting until nightfall to start riding again, then did the same again and again, passing through villages and towns at night.

It was further than I had ever been and it was a bit exciting. I had no ideas for what I might do, but the thought that the world was open to me now, that I could do as I pleased, it thrilled me.

I finally paused in a larger town, looking around and decided I liked the looks of it. Not a large city and not a tiny village, it was the perfect place to reinvent myself. Getting a room at the inn, I slept until morning, then went to have a look around the town and see what opportunities might await me.

There weren't many. When I asked after jobs, I was told to check with the seamstress. The seamstress had just taken on a new girl, but she said to check at the eatery, they needed a cook. The eatery already had a cook, but the general store needed a bookkeeper since his son had married and left.

The man at the general store looked me over, then began asking me all kinds of questions that were none of his business. Where was my husband, where were my folks, what was I running from. So I lied to him and told him I was an orphan and had been set out of the orphanage when I came of age. I was trying to make my way in the world and had never stayed so long at one place that I had found a man I would like to marry. A few men had tried to press the issue, but when I'd said no they'd taken offense, and me, a girl alone, I had run rather than stay to see what they might do.

That, he understood. He hired me on a trial basis and offered me his son's old room next to the storeroom.

The job was easy enough, though the man, Joe, had no patience for the numbers. His wife, and then his son had always done them, but now that they were both gone, he wanted someone else to do it.

I learned my way around quickly and met a great many people. Especially at church on Sunday. Joe was not reticent in sharing my story at all and everyone seemed to both feel bad for me, and also have a son or nephew or someone I should meet.

Just now, I didn't want to meet a man, I was enjoying my freedom. Making my own money, doing what I wished with it. Going alone down to the river on my time off and sketching.

That was my favorite.

As the weather got colder, I still went, wrapped up and sitting on the bank, smiling out at the sunset in front of me.

"Quite a sight."

I turned and looked up at the young man standing nearby, his horse tied off up at the road. He was handsome and his dimpled smile and sparkling eyes made my stomach flutter a bit.

"It is," I agreed, turning back to look out.

"The sunset is lovely as well," he commented.

I let out a laugh. "Very nicely done. You are going into Wallen?"

"I am, may I walk you back?"

"I could not walk with a stranger."

"My name is Harrison, now I am not a stranger. You are?"

"Katherine."

"May I walk you back, Katherine?"

"You assume I am going to Wallen as well?"

"Where else? You do not live close to here."

"How are you so sure?"

He laughed and offered his hand.

I gathered my things and took his hand, letting him help me stand and walk me back to the road. Leading his horse, he began a slow walk towards the town.

"I have not seen you in Wallen before?" he prompted.

"I have been there some months now. I work for Joe Spiwak at the general store."

"Ahh, yes. His son married, yes?"

"Yes."

"And where are you from, Miss Katherine?"

"Nowhere special. Are you from here? I have not seen you about either. Or heard of you."

"I am local, yes, but I do not often come into town. I live a ways out."

"A farm?"

"You could say that, yes."

"What do you grow?"

"A bit of everything."

"Animals?"

"Quite a few."

"Very evasive answers," I smiled.

"I suppose I could simply say 'nowhere special', or 'nothing special'."

"I suppose you could. You think yourself quite clever, don't you?"

"I don't know about that, I suppose that would be for another to decide."

"Another?"

"Whomever I am speaking to at the time. Some may think me clever, others might think me droll. Some may not understand me at all and think me rather insipid. What do you think, Katherine?"

"I do not find you to be droll or insipid. A bit forward, perhaps."

"Too forward? I suppose I should not ask you to come dine with me then?"

I tried to suppress another smile. "Perhaps another night, I took my dinner with me and ate by the river."

"A picnic? Perhaps next time I may join you. When will you go again?"

"I'm not sure I should tell you, I fear I may not get much sketching done."

"Perhaps the company will be worth it."

I smiled then, unable to help it. "Very well. I have Sundays off and I go most Sundays after church. I also get off work early on Wednesdays and I go then as well."

"Even now that it is getting colder?"

"I may go for a couple more weeks, but once the snow starts, I won't."

"Very well, Miss Katherine, lady of secrets, I will see you soon then," he grinned, taking my hand and kissing my fingers.

I let him, watching as I blushed, then hurried inside as soon as he released me. I heard myself giggling as I slipped into my bedroom.

The next morning, I casually asked Joe about him. "Do you know of a young man, tallish, curly brown hair, name of Harrison?"

"I know Alfred Harrison, but he ain't young. Ain't got a boy either."

"No, it's his first name. I don't know his last name."

"Oh... no, don't know of a Harrison. Know a Harry, but he's in his thirties. Why do you ask?"

"No real reason. Just heard some people talking," I shrugged, not wanting to fuel the man's gossip.

At church, I mentioned him again to a group of women my own age, all married, and they didn't know of him either.

He seemed to get more mysterious.

I went back to the river after church, a little more fixed up than usual and tried to sketch, but I found myself constantly watching the road. He had said he would come, hadn't he? He had said soon... not today. I had no idea if he were coming today or not.

I made myself focus on my notebook and I found myself sketching him. His full lips, the shine in his amused eyes, his soft curls.

"Is that me?"

I spun, clutching my belly in shock as I turned and looked up at him. "Where did you COME from?" I demanded, slamming my book shut. "You shouldn't sneak up!"

"I wasn't sneaking, I saw you and walked over. I was just there, in the woods."

"The woods? Why? Why were you not on the road?"

"I wasn't going into town, I was only looking to see if this spot were empty," he shrugged, then sat down near me on the bank. "So tell me, little one, did your questions bear fruit?"

"My questions?"

"Of me. Are you saying you did not ask about me?" he asked in amusement.

"Did you ask after me?"

"Of course I did and I know exactly who you are. Lord Ellingcort has launched a full search for you, he is a bit obsessed in his worry for your welfare."

"How could you possibly know that?" I asked, my breath catching.

"As I said, I asked after you. Now, will you answer my question?"

"No... no one knew anything about you at all."

His smile was pleased. "So you did ask."

"Are you going to tell anyone I am here?" I asked nervously.

"Why would I do that? If I told, you would be forced to go home and then I would never see you again. I find I have a want to see you again, Miss Katherine. And again and again."

"You know who I am, I would know who you were."

"I am Harrison Wallen," he shrugged. "When David Wallen passed, he left it all to his brother. My father. I grew up far from here, but when I returned from overseas, my father was here, so I came here too. All of this, this place you are sitting, it's my family's."

"Oh..."

"But I doubt that means much from a farm girl who ran from a rich lord, does it?" he asked with a smirk.

"So how does no one know of you? In town I mean?"

"I only arrived recently and I made sure I was not announced. There is always a to-do and too many nosy busy bodies around. I don't care for it. I like my privacy. What about you, little one? Do you like your privacy?"

"I... of course I do, but I am not sure what you mean. I also like friends and family and kinship."

"Tell me, little one, if a man such as me were to ask you to leave this place. Hide away with him in obscurity... might you consider it?"

"I might," I answered, blushing again.

"And would you consider marrying such a man? Running off to spite both of our parents and their wishes for us?"

The butterflies in my stomach threatened to carry me off!

He smirked as I floundered for words, then leaned close and took hold of my face. I had only a moment to realize what he meant to do before he was kissing me, pressing his mouth to mine and bearing me down to the bank.

He was passionate, his hands strong as his mouth forced mine open and the noise he made then... It was primal and full of need. He pulled back, "Oh, my little Katherine," he breathed. "Tell me you have thought of me and nothing else as I have thought of you and nothing else!"

"I have!" I panted, holding on to his arms, my head spinning.

"Say yes! You want me as a husband!"

"Yes!"

He smiled and leaned in again, kissing me more forcefully as he groaned. His entire body threatened to crush mine as he pressed against me. I had only a moment to realize something was off, something was wrong before he reached down and pushed his hand between my legs, gripping my most private parts as he cupped me in his hand.

"All of you will be mine," he breathed. "My wife, my love! I want all of you and I cannot wait! I won't! I have dreamed of this!"

I shook my head, confused and terrified. "We must wait!"

"A day makes no difference," he groaned, yanking my dress up.

"Wait!" I cried, turning away from his kiss. "Please, just... can't we wait?"

"No, Katherine! I need you now! I love you! I already see you as my wife, you are mine! We only need the paper, we belong to each other already. I know you feel it too!"

"I'm afraid!"

"Don't be. Don't be afraid, my little love," he whispered, shoving my dress up to my waist and forcing my legs wide with his knee.

"I want to wait!" I screamed, still terrified. Something was wrong!

"No, no my love, I cannot wait! I need you! My heart, my body, it yearns for you and I cannot wait another moment!"

"Please!" I screamed as his hand ripped away my underclothes.

"I love you," he whispered, unfastening his own pants, then pushing them down far enough that his manhood dropped heavily onto my stomach.

"Don't do this!" I begged, trying to twist out from under him.

"You're soon to be my wife! It's alright my love, you don't have to be afraid! I cannot wait for you! I need you now! Say you need me too," he demanded, his hand going back down between my legs. His fingers pressed and fumbled, rubbing and pushing too hard.

"I don't like this! STOP!" I screamed as his finger found my opening and he forced it in.

"Oh, my love. This is wonderful, perfect! You feel so good! Don't you love this? Doesn't it feel wonderful!"

"NO! STOP, PLEEEASE!" I wailed, trying to wriggle away from his intruding fingers.

"Be still, Katherine!" he admonished. "Do not fight me in this! I need you and as your husband to be, I will have you!"

"I don't want this!" I whispered in defeat as he worked his finger in and out, rubbing against my mound with his palm. There was a pleasantness to it, I realised, a rush of pleasure that was pulsing with his movements. I went still, trying to figure it out for a moment.