Katie's Love Ch. 07

Unlike the regular store manager job, this was a 9:00 AM to 6:00 PM position. I had to work Saturday mornings as well but a lot of times I would stay later in the day while I was teaching myself about all these new things. But I had a lot more free time and well I still wasn't anywhere near being over losing Katie. To be honest, it was still as painful as it had been in the beginning. The visits with Elizabeth helped and so did being near Katie's spirit when I was there, but it wasn't the same has having her with me. A case of sixteen-ounce beers never lasted a week during that period.

One night early in January while I was sitting at the apartment remembering some of the things that we had done, I decided to start writing down everything that had taken place during those wonderful twelve months that we had been together. I just didn't want to lose all of those memories. So the next day I got a notebook, pack of paper, and couple of sets of tabbed dividers. I had still had a date book from 1981 and it had a 1980 calendar in the back as well. I made a page for each weekend or day that we had been together and then every night and free minute of time that I had, I would sit there and work on transferring all my memories of her to paper. A few were in a story format but mostly it was just notes as I remembered them. Some nights were easy to remember, some took a lot of thinking to get things right. If a page got too cluttered I would redo it so that it was more readable. There were a few things that I couldn't remember an exact date as to when they happened and I had a section for those as well. There was a clear plastic pocket on the inside of the front cover and in that I put the business card that Katie had written her home phone number on, the paper with the directions to her house, and the piece of receipt that Angie had written her phone number on.

Sounds like I was obsessed? That I was, but I also found that my mind worked better without having three or four beers to cloud it, so it helped in that respect. I didn't stop drinking but I limited myself to one or two beers a night or one beer and a shot from what was left of the bottles of good Scotch and Bourbon that she had gotten for me.

January 24th was a Sunday and I had been working on the notebook on and off all day. It was also a full moon that night and I could see the moon rising through the kitchen window. I decided to write about that night that Katie and I had made love under a full moon back in August. Even though that was one of the nights that I remembered very clearly, finding the words to describe what had happened wasn't very easy. Around 9:30 PM I was ready to give up and move onto another day when I had a strange feeling. A feeling like someone was watching me. It got very strong and then I knew what it was.

I called out, "Katie?"

She gave me one of those feelings that I can come to know as her kiss, and said in her special way, "I am here Tony, I am here."

I started crying and replied, "I thought that that candles were the only way to call and feel you?"

Katie said, "I have to be there when they are lit but I can be other places when they are not. I have been here every night for you."

I asked, "Why didn't you let me know?"

She answered, "I want you to heal and be strong."

I replied, "I don't ever want to stop loving you."

She said, "You do not have to stop loving me and I know that you never will. But you have to live Tony. You have to live."

Then she touched something in my mind and that fantastic night of making love under a full moon came back as vividly as when it happened. I started writing all of it down and Katie was with me the whole time.

When I was done, I asked her, "How can I call you?"

Katie just said, "Forever and ever and ever," and then she left me or at least I couldn't feel her anymore, but by then I knew what she meant.

I kept working on the notebook for the next month and decided to write down what was happening with Elizabeth as well. But after that night, I did start to crawl out of that hole that I had been living in and started to get my life back together. Katie would visit me without warning or reason, sometimes to talk to me a little, sometimes with just one of her kisses, and once in a while to bring back another memory that I was struggling with.

From the very beginning, Elizabeth encouraged me to start dating again. I knew what we had wasn't going to be permanent but I had really come to appreciate the time that I got to spend with her. Not just because of Katie but because she was such a great person to be with and not just in bed either.

I never had much luck with meeting women in bars but I started to hang out at one on Friday nights that had a crowd that was around my age. I never did meet any one there but it was someplace to go. There was one girl who worked at the bank where I had an account at that seemed pretty nice. One day she said something about breaking up with her boyfriend so I asked her out. We went out for supper, then went back to her place and started making out on her couch. She didn't want to screw but she let me eat her to a couple of orgasms and gave me a blowjob. But a few days later when I was at the bank she told me that she had made up with her boyfriend so that was the end of that.

I went out with a few others as well but nothing happened. I started talking to the girl that I had been serious with back in college. We went out for supper a few times and the third night we went back to her apartment and had sex. Like it had been when we were dating before, it was nothing fancy and she went on a guilt trip afterwards about doing it. But we kept talking on the phone once a week and going out occasionally as well.

When I was over at Elizabeth's house the next Saturday, which was the first week in February, I told her about Katie visiting me.

She replied, "I know Tony, she did the same to me. I was sitting at the kitchen table last Saturday morning and was going though some of the paperwork from her estate. I was very sad but she came and cheered me up."

I said, "I wish I understood what was going on with her."

Elizabeth laughed a little and replied, "I can't even begin to tell you Tony how many times over the years that I had that same thought about Katie."

After supper that evening Elizabeth showed me the photo album that had all of her pictures of Katie. From the time she was born until after she had graduated college. I listened as she told me the story behind each and every picture and despite the pain that she was still feeling, I could tell how proud she was of her. One of the last pictures was of Katie standing in front of her house with her arms spread wide and a great big smile on her face.

Elizabeth said, "I took that the day she closed on the house. She was so happy. We both took a few days off of work and cleaned it top to bottom."

I replied, "I know how much she loved her house and it was always clean. You did teach her well in that department."

She laughed and said, "Katie wasn't always like that. There were times that I would cringe whenever I went into her bedroom."

I sat for a few seconds and said, "Do you know what is sad? I don't have a single picture of her. Neither of us had a camera and I never asked her for one."

Elizabeth replied, "Really?" and she pulled an envelope out of the back of the album. She got out a picture of Katie standing outside in a graduation cap and gown. She said, "This was the day that she graduated from college. I had a few extra ones made. I will give you any of the other ones you want. My negatives got ruined last year when a pipe started leaking over the closet where I had them stored but I have plenty of pictures of her."

I took the picture in my hand and said, "No. Those are your memories. This is fine Elizabeth. Thank you so very much."

She replied, "I am glad that I decided to do this tonight. I know you will never forget her but a picture is still nice."

I leaned over, kissed her, then I placed the picture on the end table next to the couch and we went upstairs to bed. I spanked her with my hand and we settled in the bed and kissed and played for a little while.

I fingered her to a climax and was going to move down and eat her when she asked, "Do you remember me telling you that Katie's father and I had sex every Saturday night?"

"Yes," I answered.

Elizabeth replied, "When it was that time of the month, he didn't want to get all messy doing it in the front so he would," and her face got very red, "Stick it in my butt." The expression on her face was just so funny that I had to laugh a little. She went on, "The first few times it really hurt and my butt was pretty sore for a couple of days so I decided to do a little reading on the subject. Everybody at the library thought I was reading a cooking book but I was reading one of those sex books about how to do it in the butt!" I laughed some more as she finished with, "They said about getting greased up first before you did that and after we started doing it that way, it felt pretty good. At least my butt wasn't sore the next day!"

I said, "Yes, that does help when you are having sex that way."

Her face got red again and she asked, "Would you like to," and she paused and smiled, "Do it in my butt?"

I kissed her and answered, "If you want to do it that is okay with me. I like making love to a woman there."

She sat up and replied, "I will be right back." She got off the bed, walked out the door and she came back a minute later and set a old cloth diaper and a jar of petroleum jelly on the nightstand. Elizabeth lay back down next to me and said with a big smile, "Whenever you are ready, I will grease it up and you can stick it in!"

I said, "I will take care of that." We kissed, played with our fingers some more, then I sat up, she rolled on her stomach and got up on her knees. I opened the jar, stuck in my middle finger and pulled out a glob of the stuff. I pressed it against her asshole and pushed it in. She turned her head back and looked at me with a little bit of surprise. "Are you okay?" I asked.

"Yes, that feels good," she replied, "I just thought that you would put some on your thing and push it in. But I guess you know what you are doing so I will be quiet," and she turned her head forward again.

I smiled and worked my finger in and around for a while, then after getting some more of the lube, I went in with both my index and middle finger. Again she looked back at me in surprise, but then she smiled and turned her head back. I got some more, lubed my cock up and wiped my hands on the diaper. I got behind her ass and pressed my cock against it. Just then I felt one of Katie's giggles and Elizabeth did as well because she shook a little.

Elizabeth looked up and out into the room and said, "Katie, you shouldn't be watching me do this!"

I felt another giggle and I heard Katie say, "Not the first time!" and I laughed a little.

Elizabeth asked, "What is so funny back there?"

"Nothing," I answered and added, "I am going to start going in."

She replied, "Okay."

I started to push my cock in her asshole. I went in an inch, stopped, then another inch and stopped.

I pushed in another inch and I asked her, "Are you alright? Tell me if it hurts at all."

"No," she answered, "It feels really nice." I gently pushed until my cock was completely inside of her ass. "Oh my Tony," she said.

I pulled back out half way and pushed slowly back in. I screwed her ass like that for a while then I started going faster. Her breathing got faster but it didn't seem like she was going to climax so I placed my finger on her clit and started to rub it.

That was all it took because she came hard with a very loud, "Oh my!"

I moved my finger away and started going slow again, then I said, "Let me know if you start getting sore."

Elizabeth looked back and replied, "This is very nice Tony. It doesn't hurt at all." I screwed her slowly for a few more minutes, then I started going faster and brought her to another climax with my finger on her clit. I slowed down and she said, "The next time you decide to do that go ahead and give me the baby stuff"

It was so cute the way she said that that I laughed and answered, "I will."

She said, "But take your time," and I did.

I slowly and gently screwed her for while and then I pulled my cock back a little farther to where her ass was tighter and started screwing faster. Her breathing got faster and I got close to cumming, I went to finger her clit again, but this time she came without me doing so. I pushed in deep and my cock throbbed and the sperm started pumping out. I stayed deep inside of her as her orgasm subsided.

"Oh my!" she called out, "Oh my!"

I stayed like that for a minute as my cock softened, then I slid it out and said, "I am going to wash off."

She replied, "Okay."

I went to the bathroom, washed and pissed. When I went back to the bedroom Elizabeth was lying on her stomach with her head facing the doorway. I got on the bed, lay down on the bed on my side and started lightly running my hand up and down her back.

Elizabeth smiled and said, "I know that is nasty stuff doing it in the butt and I will probably go to hell for it, but that was very nice. Thank you."

"Thank you for asking me to do it," I replied, "It was very nice for me also."

With a laugh she said, "Oh I call tell that by how much baby stuff you gave me," and she shook her ass a little and added "But it feels nice in there."

She would have the jar of petroleum jelly and the diaper waiting on the nightstand once a month after that when I was there.

That Monday I got a frame for the picture of Katie that Elizabeth had given me. I had put the box with the hairbrush in it on top of my dresser and I placed the picture next to it.

I did ask Elizabeth one night about Katie and the hairbrush. I had spanked Elizabeth for the first time with her hairbrush when I had been there two weeks prior and that got me thinking about it. We had been talking about Katie a little as we sat on the couch after supper.

I asked, "Can you tell me Elizabeth why Katie was so afraid of her father's hairbrush?"

She said, "Honestly Tony, I don't know. She just got to the point where all he had to do was pick it up and she would start crying and shaking. He made that box for it and gave it to her as a gift when she graduated college. I thought she was going to have a heart attack when she opened it. He told her, "I guess I won't be needing it any more." She thanked him and closed the box very quickly. I am really surprised that she kept it and even more surprised that she showed it to you."

I replied, "She asked me to spank her with it a couple of times. I knew that it scared the shit out of her but she never told me why."

Elizabeth said, "I am very surprised that she would have you do that. It was about the same time when she got really afraid of the hairbrush that she started sleeping with the light on in her room. I got up to go to the bathroom one night and I saw that she had her lamp on. I went in, turned it off, and accidentally bumped into her bed. Katie woke up and started screaming. I turned the light back on and she asked me, "Mom, please leave the light on?" I said that I would and the next day I gave her the nightlight that I used in her room when she was a baby. She always had one after that even when she went to college."

"I knew she was afraid of the dark," I said, "But that was something else that she never told me why."

She smiled and said, "Katie was always complicated!"

I laughed and said, "She told me that you called her that."

For Valentine's Day I got Elizabeth a nice card and a dozen white roses. She had told me that I didn't need to "Fuss about it," using her own words but she was very happy with the flowers nevertheless. I also got a single pink rose for Katie's grave as well.

Through all of this, I really looked forward to each visit with Elizabeth. Making love to her was always a joy, sometimes we would laugh and joke as we played, but most times it was very passionate. But it was also nice to have someone to talk to. There were sad times as we talked about Katie and I did a lot of crying, but there were a lot of nice talks as well, both about Katie and other things as well. She had told me I could see her every weekend but the weekends that I wasn't there gave me a chance to keep putting my life back together. I always stopped by and visited Katie's grave on Sunday after I left her house, even after it had snowed. They would clean the snow off the path around the cemetery but my footprints were usually the only ones that left the path to walk over to the graves. Winter turned into spring and I started going for walks on Sunday afternoons. Once in a while I would go up to our favorite State Park but most of the time I just found someplace local to get out and enjoy the fresh air.

One night in March when I was there, Elizabeth showed me Katie's bedroom. It was small and decorated like she was still in high school or early college. There were stuffed animals and dolls on the bed and dresser tops.

Elizabeth said, "Katie had a favorite doll that she used to sleep with. Even when she came to visit me after she got her house, she would always hold that doll in arms as she went to sleep."

I replied, "I can see her doing that."

She said, "I told her to take it along with her when she got the house, but she said that it belonged here. Somehow the doll's face got broken on the one side but she never told me how it happened. I told her that I would get her a new one but she wouldn't let me."

I asked, "Which one is it?"

Elizabeth drew in a deep breath and answered, "I gave it to the funeral home to put it in the coffin with her," and she cried a little and I did the same.

Elizabeth's birthday was April 15th, which was the same as Katie's birthday. She didn't want me getting her anything but again I got her a dozen roses and a nice card. She made a small cake that was decorated with Katie's name and a rose made from pink icing. We sang Happy Birthday to Katie and then we both cried for a little while. I sang Happy Birthday to Elizabeth and afterwards as we were sitting on the couch, she told me about Katie's birth.

"She went in July 15th and came out on April 15th," she said, "It should have been the 14th which was Saturday, but we had been out with some friends that night and got home late. It was after midnight until we got done in bed." Then she added, "I was born at 5:36 AM and Katie was born at 5:36 PM."

I replied, "That is a neat coincidence."

Elizabeth got a very sad look to her face and quietly said, "I will be right back."

She got off the couch, went upstairs, and came back down a few minutes later. As she approached the couch I could see that she had her hand closed around something but I couldn't tell what it was. She sat back down on the couch and reached over with her free hand to lift my hand and turned it so that the palm was facing up. She pressed what she had in her other hand into mine and moved her hand away.

It was a woman's watch that I recognized as Katie's. The face was cracked and the light brown leather band was torn and had dark brown stains on it. The watch had stopped at exactly 5:36.

I started shaking as Elizabeth softly said, "You can keep that if you want."

I closed my fist around it for a few seconds, then I returned it to her hand as I replied, "No. I can't."

She held it in her hand until we went upstairs. She went to Katie's bedroom, came back without the watch and we went into her bedroom where we made love the rest of the night.

When I was there two weeks later, Elizabeth told me that the sale of Katie's house had been completed. Katie had purchased mortgage insurance, so that was already paid off and the house had sold at for a lot more than Katie had purchased it for. Elizabeth wanted to give me some of the money but I refused. There was no way I could do anything like that. The attorney that handled Katie's estate wanted her to sue the trucking company for causing the accident but Elizabeth wanted no part of it. She told him just to settle it out of court. That was done the middle of May and again she offered me some of the money but I told her no. She donated all of that to charity.