Katie's Quest Ch. 10

"Of course. Please, follow me and I'll show you to your seats."

The seats were in a quieter corner of the restaurant, which was just fine with Katie. It meant she didn't have to raise her voice to be heard over the other customers, and gave them some measure of privacy.

Kieran stared at the menu he was handed. "That's not a menu, that's a book."

"Hey, at least you've got a lot of options." Katie opened hers up and began to scan it. Kieran did the same, saw the prices, and winced.

"I think I understand why I haven't been here before."

"Well, there's a first time for everything." As you will soon find out. "So, what looks good to you?"

He thought for a moment before answering. That's one of the many things I like about you, Callaway. You're so mature and serious--a man, where so many of the guys at our school are still boys. "I guess...would it be all right if I had one of those smoothies and a Coke?"

"Of course! Kieran, we're on vacation. Order whatever you want. I know I will! Hey, want to get some nachos for an appetizer?"

He licked his lips, utterly unaware of how much it turned her on. "Now you're talking. What about you?"

"I'll have the same, but with Dr. Pepper instead of Coke. And for the main course...hmmm....I think the four-cheese pasta looks pretty good."

"You've had it before?"

"Oh, yes."

"Then that's what I'll have too."

"You sure? You can get whatever you like."

"I'm sure," he said. "I'd rather get something with the Katie Petersen stamp of approval than take a chance on something I might not like."

"Awwww!" She put a hand over her heart melodramatically. "That really hits me where I live."

"Good. That means it worked."

The waitress came by and they placed their orders. The drinks arrived first, then a truly massive plate of nachos. Between the two of them, the teenagers demolished it completely and still had plenty of room for the pasta that followed. The nachos were delicious, but when Kieran took his first bite of penne noodles, his eyes closed and his expression became one of pure rapture. "Oh. My. God." He looked down at his place. "This must be what angels have for dinner or something. It's incredible!"

"Told you so," Katie said sweetly. She took a bite of her own food and then another. "Oh, yeah. That's the stuff."

"Think we'll have room for dessert?" he asked.

"I have no idea, but we're getting it anyway."

Kieran took a long slug of his smoothie. "I love the way you think."

"Flattery will get you nowhere, Callaway," she teased back. You have no need for flattery. You've already proven you don't need it. You've shown me the kind of person you are. You've earned the right to touch me in a way no one ever has before.

Between them they demolished their meal, as well as the delicious confections that followed. Kieran ordered a decadent-looking slice of warm apple pie with a scoop of vanilla ice cream, while Katie ordered the titular cheesecake. It was absolutely sinful, and she savored every last bite. After all those years of scrupulous healthy eating, it felt great to cut loose and just eat what she wanted for a change.

By the time the check came, both of them were full. Katie paid for the meal, gently overriding Kieran's objections in the process, and they left the restaurant soon after. As they walked past the hostess on the way out the door, Katie took Kieran's hand in her own and made sure the other woman saw her do it.

Her excitement and anxiousness kept building during the drive back to the hotel. Katie's heart was pounding in her chest. Ironically, the thought of laying all her cards on the table and telling Kieran what she wanted him to do to her frightened her more than actually having the baby. This was the riskiest, most unpredictable part of the plan. There was simply no way of knowing how Kieran would react, and that terrified her. What if he left, or pushed her away, or worse, cut off their friendship completely? Six years of hard work would be undone in an instant, but more than that, the thought of not seeing him again was more than she could bear. She didn't want to lose him! More to the point, the idea of doing it with some other guy was unthinkable. She wanted Kieran. She wanted his baby, not someone else's.

Everything was balanced on a knife edge, but it was too late to back out now. She was committed, and she knew if she didn't make her move tonight, she might never get a better opportunity. So Katie laughed and joked with him as she'd come to love doing, all the while keeping her mask firmly in place and doing her best not to let her fraying nerves show.

When they got back to the hotel, Katie had to fight not to simply jump out of the car. Instead, she let Kieran open the door for her before they headed inside, though he paused to drop the keys off with the valet on the way. As she passed the front desk, she paused and asked in a soft whisper, "Do you guys have candles?"

"Yes, ma'am." The person behind the desk was the same one she'd given a hefty tip to not long before. "Why do you ask?"

"I need some."

"Ma'am, those candles are hotel property--"

Katie slipped him another $50 bill. The receptionist halted in mid-sentence, took the money, and put it somewhere out of sight. "Of course, ma'am. I'll see them delivered up there. How many?"

"At least 10, preferably the big round ones. Send them up in about an hour or so, please, and light them. Thanks!"

"Of course, ma'am. Happy to be of service."

"Katie?" Kieran called from the elevator. "You okay?"

"Yeah!" She hurried over to meet him. "Sorry about that, I just needed to ask about something. Don't worry about it."

"Oh, okay. No problem." He pressed the button and the elevator slid smoothly upward. "This was an awesome first day," Kieran went on. "You were right, when you first asked me to go with you. If I hadn't done this, I'd definitely regret it forever. I can't remember the time I had this much fun!"

You ain't seen nothing yet. "Me either. It's so nice to get away from it all for a while." She swiped her key card and opened the door to their suite. "And seeing the look on your face when you tried the food was worth every penny!"

"You're sadistic," Kieran retorted good-naturedly. "Hey, wanna watch a movie? The TV has Netflix, HBO, Hulu..."

Katie drew in a breath and met his gaze squarely, though her warm, friendly expression never changed. Here goes everything. The die is cast--forward and into the breach!

"Maybe later, Kieran. But first...there's something I want to talk to you about."

Kieran immediately picked up on her serious tone and frowned. "Is something wrong? Are you feeling sick? Did you eat too much?"

"No, no. N-nothing like that." Katie was shocked to hear her voice tremble a little. Just nerves. Just ignore it and keep going. "I'm fine, honest. I just...I need to be open with you about something. Something really, really important." She took a seat by the bed and patted the mattress next to her. "Will you come sit with me?"

"Um. Okay." He sounded perplexed, and she didn't blame him. I'd be perplexed too. She reached over and placed both hands gently on one of his. "Do you remember," Katie began in a soft voice, "when I said that I would always be a straight shooter with you, Kieran?"

"Yeah. Of course. And you have been."

"I know, and that's not going to change. What I'm about to tell you, what I'm about to say--I really, really, really need you to not freak out, all right?"

He paled. "Oh, God. What'd I do?"

"You didn't do anything! In fact, it's just the opposite--this is about what something I want you to do. Just let me talk for a few minutes, all right?"

"...Okay."

"Thank you." She cleared her throat. "Kieran, I want you to know, first of all, that what I'm about to say...the only reason I didn't tell you about it right off the bat is because I wanted to get to know you first. I wanted to know you, the real you, before having this conversation. And now that I do, I can finally tell you something I've never told anyone else. Not even my parents."

Kieran stared in confusion and growing anxiety, but didn't try to interrupt.

"You know what it's like to have goals--to want something with all your heart, and strive to achieve it. You did that when you fixed up the truck your dad gave you, and you're still doing it as you prepare to take over the family business. You know what it's like to work hard for something you want--you set your mind to something and you work your ass off to achieve it. That's one of the things I like most about you, though there are many more. You've shown me the kind of man and the kind of person you are--you are so sweet, and so kind, and you're always such a gentleman. You are a good person, down-to-earth, and just a lot of fun to spend time with."

"...And?"

"I have a goal too, Kieran. I have something I want too, something I've wanted ever since I was 12 years old. I've worked hard in pursuit of it, just as you have. Your father's been grooming you to take over the family business for years. Do you know what I've been doing during those years? I've been preparing for this day. Everything I've done--the beauty pageants, the martial arts tournaments, getting excellent grades...it's all been to help me get closer to achieving the objective I set for myself. I just need one more thing to get it--and that's you."

Katie took a second to compose herself, fighting to keep her roiling passion and emotions in check.

"What's your goal, Katie?" Kieran finally asked.

Blue eyes met his brown, and he saw in their cerulean depths the sincerity with which she spoke, the firm determination, the warmth and affection she felt for him. Katie didn't break the eye contact for almost thirty seconds. She wanted him to see it.

"What I want," she said quietly. "is to be a mother, Kieran. I want to get pregnant. I want to have a baby--and I want you to be the one to give it to me."

The bottom abruptly fell out of Kieran's stomach.

His ears heard the words, but his brain refused to process them. Surely he hadn't heard Katie Petersen say something so outrageous. Surely he hadn't heard the mayor's daughter, the most beautiful, most popular, most unattainable woman in the entire state and probably some the neighboring states as well, tell him point-blank that she wanted to get pregnant. This...this...

This was not happening. Could not be happening. Katie Petersen, who didn't date. Katie Petersen, who never so much as got drunk at a party. Katie Petersen, who turned down every love confession she'd ever received. Katie Petersen, that Katie Petersen, wanted to get pregnant.

With him.

"Kieran?" Katie asked. Her voice was barely more than a whisper.

"I...I..." He ran a shaking hand through his hair. "I mean...Jesus, Katie. What the fuck?"

She smiled, a little sadly. "I know. I know, it's all bit...much?"

"A bit much? A bit much?" He got up off the bed and began pacing frantically around the room. His face was ghost-white, his eyes wide with surprise and more than a little fear. "You ask me out of the blue to get you pregnant, and you think that's a bit much? Do you have any idea what you're saying?!"

"Yes." Confidence seeped into her tone of voice. "Yes, I do."

"The hell you do!" Kieran said. "Katie, raising a kid is...it's not just a big responsibility, it's...I don't even...I can't even find the words for it. For God's sake, you can't be serious! This is insane!"

"No, it's not." Somehow, she grew calmer as he grew more upset. "Kieran, listen to me. Just take a deep breath and listen, okay?"

"How the hell do you plan on supporting a kid? We're only 18!"

"I've been saving up for years," she informed him. "I've got six figures in my bank account, plus my trust fund, and I've got a job lined up already at a firm downtown. I start after graduation. If you're worried about child support, don't be--I wouldn't expect anything from you financially, and I'm happy to provide that in writing if you want."

He faltered in mid-ramble. Clearly, he hadn't been expecting an answer like that. "But...but your parents and everyone else, what will they think? Don't you care about your reputation?"

"Not when it comes to this. They can think whatever they want about me--this is my choice, Kieran. I want this. I choose this--and I choose you."

"But...Katie, you're still so young!"

"And?" she cocked her head. "What's your point, exactly? Let me let you in on something: girls get pregnant younger than 18 all the time. People like to pretend it doesn't happen, but it does. Girls get knocked up at 15 or 16 or 17, and a lot of those girls are way less prepared than I am."

"Are you, though?" he pressed. Katie didn't begrudge his skepticism one bit. "Are you prepared? Is anyone really prepared to raise a kid?"

She jutted her chin forward a little. "I can't speak for anyone else, but I am," she declared confidently. "It's like I told you a second ago, I know what a huge deal it is to be a parent. I've been preparing for it for six years. Six years, Kieran. I've done all the research. I've read every book on childcare you could possibly think of, I've babysat for all my neighbors, I've taken care of everything to make sure I give my baby the best life possible. No child will be more loved and more well-cared for than the one I'm asking you to make with me. He or she will want for nothing."

Kieran was silent for a long moment. When he spoke next, his voice tone was harsh enough to make her flinch. "If you're really so prepared, then answer one more question."

"Go on."

"Was there ever a point during all your planning and preparing where you ever considered how I might feel about all this?"

Katie blinked in surprise, her confidence wavering for the first time. "I--"

Kieran didn't let her finish the sentence. "Let's say we do it and you do get pregnant. What do you expect me to do after that? When I see you around town pushing that stroller, am I supposed to pretend not to know you? Am I supposed to pretend the kid isn't mine as much as it is yours?" He laughed a little hysterically. "I'm not sure what I'm more upset about: the fact that you apparently only befriended me because you wanted a sperm donor, or the fact you think I'm the kind of guy who'd just walk away from his own child!"

Katie flinched as if he'd slapped her. His words struck home and she felt a pang of intense guilt. He's right. I should have considered that. I was wrong not to. Still, she rallied swiftly.

"It's not like that! I don't think of you that way," she insisted. "Kieran, I didn't become your friend just to have sex with you--I want to have sex with you because you're my friend, because I trust you and know you won't hurt me or make me feel unsafe! From the moment I first saw you, sitting there in Mrs. Martinez's homeroom, I knew there was something special about you. And I was right! I've never met anyone like you before, Kieran Callaway, and that's why I want you to be the one. Do you understand yet? If it was just a matter of finding a guy I'd have them lined up all the way down the street to get in my pants. But I don't want just any guy. I want you, and no other."

"But you don't want me to be involved afterward," he replied flatly.

"I...Okay, full disclosure: I should have considered that possibility, all right? I just...I don't know, I just thought that with everything else you've got going on, with the auto shop and everything, you wouldn't want the added pressure."

"Well, you thought wrong."

"I know. I see that now, and I'm sorry."

Kieran ignored the apology. "If you've gotten to know me as well as you say you have, you know I'm not the kind of guy who could just walk away from something like that. I could never abandon a child of mine, no matter how 'prepared' you think you are. Maybe some guys are cold enough to get girls pregnant and not want any involvement, but not me." He narrowed his eyes a little. "More to the point, I know the pain of growing up with only one parent--I've lived with it for three years now and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy!"

"Careful," Katie warned him. "A lot of single moms raise their kids just fine."

"But you don't ito be a single mom!" Kieran said exasperatedly. "That's the thing! What's stopping you from just dating and getting married like everyone else? What's stopping you from finding a guy you love, and who loves you, and then having a baby?" He shook his head. "I'm sorry. I really am. But I don't have it in me to just get you pregnant and walk away, or try to be 'just friends' afterward like nothing happened at all. I can't do that. And I wouldn't even if I could. The only way I'd do something like that with you is if I put a ring on your finger first."

"Would you?"

Kieran's words ground to a screeching halt. "...Come again?"

"Would you, if I said yes? Would you put a ring on my finger?"

He stared, slack-jawed. "...You're crazy."

"Answer the damn question, please," she replied, her own patience starting to unravel. This was not going at all like Katie imagined it would. "Would you put a ring on my finger? If I did say yeah, let's get married, would you be on board with it?"

"Are you serious?!"

"It's a very simple question, Kieran. Yes or no?"

Kieran was silent for almost a solid minute. She could practically hear the fuses blowing in his brain. He sat down heavily in a chair as if his legs were about to give way. "...I don't know," he admitted. "I've...never met anyone like you either. But this...what you're asking me to do, that should be with someone you actually have feelings for. Someone you love." He looked away, unable to meet her eyes with what he said next. "And I'm not that someone."

Katie took a moment to examine her own feelings before she said anything more. Did she love Kieran? At present, no. But I think I may be starting to, she realized. All the things he'd been making her feel lately, the butterflies in her stomach when they touched, the happiness and lightness of heart she felt in her chest when they were together, the way he made her laugh so easily...that was something which could grow easily into love, given time.

When she finally did speak, there was something in her voice Kieran had never heard before. Uncertainty. Vulnerability.

"I think you could be," Katie Petersen said, very softly and very quietly. "I think you could be that someone, Kieran Callaway. I don't have a lot of basis for comparison, but yeah. I think I could fall in love with you. You and me, we go together really well. Look how close we've gotten over just a few weeks. Is it really such a stretch to think we might grow even closer in a few more?"

Kieran gave her a sad smile. "You don't have to say that just to make me feel better, Katie. You're only saying that to get what you want."

"I'm not!" she insisted. "I promised you I'd always be honest with you, and that's the honest truth."

Kieran regarded her with even greater disbelief, if that was possible. "So...what? You're saying you actually want to go through with it? Get married, just like that?"

Katie thought about it for a moment. She'd daydreamed about motherhood for years, and in all that time and in all those happy scenarios there'd never been room for a man. She'd never imagined a man by her side as she watched her child learn to walk, or ride a bike, or head off to the first day of kindergarten, or read a bedtime story.

But she could see Kieran there, doing all of those things right beside her.

Was it really so complicated? The two of them got on very well--the chemistry and sexual energy between them was natural and organic. Nothing about the way they interacted was forced or feigned. They clicked in a way she'd only seen in sappy Hallmark movies.

Marriages had been built on way less than what she and Kieran had.