Keeping a Secret

When I entered the house, I wanted nothing more than to simply flop on the couch and nap. We'd all been working long hours, pretty typical for the season, but it was taking its toll on me already. I tossed my vest aside and made my way into the kitchen. I'd certainly earned a beer, and I meant to have more than a couple, even if it was just a Wednesday.

I cracked the top on the beer and glanced around the living room. Everything was still in order. I scoffed at myself. To be called a "living room", one would actually have to live in it. The plush couch even looked as though I hadn't sat on it in weeks, the cushions still as new as the day I moved the thing into the house. The huge TV and stereo system was all neat and orderly, but I saw a thin film of dust on everything. Though it all looked like a nice neat space, with matching curtains and lampshades, the bare walls and empty end tables would have told anyone that I lived alone.

I glanced at the screen on my phone and sighed. I might have just left my job, but there was still another to be done. I didn't bother switching on any of the lights as I made my way down the hall. I went right for the spare room, my "office", and pushed the door open.

Even after years, the room made me smile. The wall of screens and monitors covered the entire length of one side of the room, and the massive desk I'd made was aglow in colored lights. Figurines and bobbleheads were placed just so, staring at me with blank greetings as I entered my lair. The huge black sofa against the opposite wall beckoned to me just as the couch in the living room had. The giant pillows that were piled against each arm looked so inviting. A game controller still sat on the sofa from last night.

I made my way to my own private command center and tapped the keyboard. Each of the four screens came to life. Of course, the long, curved monitor in the center of my desk was the most impressive, with a shimmering animated screen saver ready to greet me. I typed my password into my computer, and the backgrounds of each monitor illuminated.

Immediately, I set to finding some music to play. The huge speakers on the stands in the corner blasted to life, and I scrambled to turn down the volume. It was a reminder that I'd been mixing a track for a video last night. The room was fully alive now. My desk lamps were lit. The dim, colored lights behind each screen were pulsing. My rig at the end of the desk was whirring. I frowned at the coat of dust on the glass of the PC, that only I would be able to see.

I was tempted to fool around, surf the web or social media, or find a game to play or a new mod to download. Instead, I steeled myself and opened the video editing program on my main screen. I set right to work, setting up my workflow and aligning things to the screens that I wanted. I rolled my eyes at the steady stream of email notifications that kept sliding across the bottom of my monitor. Everything these days was an advertisement.

For a while, I clicked through pages of my latest project. Though it was still a grind, I felt so much more at ease working here than at the store. I sipped my beer, distantly reminding myself to stock the mini-fridge under my huge desk with more beer from the kitchen. I was almost finished with this latest project, and with any luck I'd be able to send a first draft back to the creator I'd been working with. Matt was his name, but Dizzy was what I called him. It was better than DiZZyBoard3345. His channel was starting to grow, though, even if I thought he was grating, and I liked to think that the long nights I spent in this room contributed to his success.

I was just about to get into the flow of editing when my phone vibrated across the polished wood top of my desk. I glanced at the screen and scrunched up my face. It was a number I didn't know. The old me would have ignored the call, but it could be anyone. The intense amount of networking I had been doing lately was snatching me so many more offers.

Knowing I had to answer it, I reached for the phone and swiped open the call.

"Hello?" I said.

"Um, h-hey!" A voice answered in the phone. "Is this... Gavin?"

"Yep, sure is," I told the voice.

"Hey, man, it's uh... Alex... from work?"

I spun slowly in my chair away from the screen.

It took only seconds to place a face with the voice and the name. I was still caught off guard.

"Oh... hey, Alex," I said.

All I could picture was the shy guy's black hair that hid his eyes, bushy and round like a shaggy helmet.

"I... hope you don't mind," Alex said. "I got your number from Daniel? He s-said you'd be the one to call."

Alex sounded just as awkward and timid as he did at the store. I'd only spoken with him a handful of times when he actually did speak. He seemed a cool enough guy. I briefly wondered if he needed video editing. It was certainly a possibility that he'd be the type. Daniel wouldn't know about any of that, however, and I was more intrigued now. A coworker hadn't ever approached me about anything like that before.

"It's cool, Alex," I said. "Well, what's up, man? What do you need?"

I could hear a bit of the nervousness in the young guy's voice, and a pinch more of his awkward demeanor.

"Well, um, I'm having trouble with my computer," Alex told me. "Like... bad problems. Daniel said maybe you were good with fixing stuff like that?"

I glanced at the wall of huge monitors and pulsating lights on the wall, and the seven programs and multiple tabs that littered the screen.

"Uh, yeah," I said. "I guess you could say that."

"Oh, good," I heard Alex say. "Because I've got kind of a big problem, and I've looked all over the internet t-to try to fix it... I don't know, I'm not really great with this kind of thing."

Again, I couldn't help but see the young guy in my head. He seemed on the "alt" side to me, and someone that might be more savvy with tech than I was. I didn't really know him, though. His youth may have counted for nothing. He may have been twenty? Twenty-two at the most?

"Oh, yeah?" I said, grabbing my mouse and absently scrolling through my editing program. "What sort of big problem are we talking about?"

"Like, my computer won't even boot," Alex told me. "It... tries, I guess. There's some lights that come on. B-but nothing ever comes on the screen. And nothing ever turns on."

I'd heard this sort of thing before, usually from family members wanting me to fix something. Ironically, the same family members that liked to tell me I spent too much time indoors and that I was ruining my brain with computers and games. I chewed my lip, a bit disappointed that I wasn't talking to someone about a new video project or something along those lines. I knew better than to think I would leave someone hanging like that, though.

"So, what kind of computer is it?" I asked Alex. "Is it a laptop? Desktop?"

"It's... like a gaming PC," he answered. "I can send you the specs or whatever you need. I have them written down or something somewhere."

I made a little face to myself. Any gamer with a fancy rig that knew what he had would have already been spitting specs into my ear, whether I asked for them or not. Maybe Alex didn't know a whole lot about it. At least it wasn't my uncle's eight year old laptop with the wired mouse dangling from the USB port.

"And it won't boot?" I asked. "It won't even light the screen up?"

"No," Alex answered. "No, and... I have important stuff on there. Like... stuff I can't lose. Even if I can't fix it, is there a way to pull the stuff off of there? Like from the hard drive?"

I grinned. "Probably, man. But look, it's most likely something simple. Just... bring it by my house and I'll check it out. All I need is the rig itself, I've got plenty of stuff to plug it into. As long as you're sure it's not just the screen not working?"

"No, no," Alex said. "The screen works. Um... do you mean tonight?"

"Sure, dude," I said. "I'll be here. I can just text you the address if you want?"

"Y-yeah, that'd be great!" Alex replied. "Um, thanks, Gavin. I'll... I'll drop it by in just a few, if that's okay?"

I chuckled away from the phone at how nervous Alex sounded.

"Yeah, man," I told him. "I'll be here. I'll text you."

"O-okay, sure," he said. "Thanks, Gavin."

"Sure thing, bud."

When we hung up, I immediately texted the number Alex had called from and set my phone on the desk. I tried to recall any of our conversations at work. They were few and far between, but Alex always seemed to be a nice enough guy, if a bit awkward. He still dressed kind of like he was a teenager, but I smiled knowing that I did the same thing at that age. Ten years seemed so long ago. I tried not to dwell on the last thought, or else I'd probably drink myself into a stupor later.

I continued finishing up Dizzy's project and had actually forgotten about Alex's call until I heard the doorbell ring. I rolled back in my chair and stretched, then turned up the last of my latest beer before chucking it into the little trash can beside the desk. I made my way to the front door and opened it to find Alex standing on my front step, his pale arm hugging a big black PC tower while he waited.

Alex glanced at me, his mouth opening but no words ever came out. He gave a little flick of his head to toss some of his black bangs away from his face. It was the first time I'd ever noticed his nose ring, probably because he wasn't allowed to wear it at work. It was weird to see someone from work even standing on my stoop, but I nodded to him and smiled.

"Hey, man," I said, and motioned to him. "C'mon inside so we can set that thing down somewhere."

I stood aside and allowed Alex into the house. I realized how dark it was in my neglected living room, and I reached over to flick on the lights so that Alex could see. I shut the door, and saw my coworker glancing around the room, the big PC still hugged tightly to his chest. I was thankful to see that there weren't wires dangling from the tower, unlike Uncle Jerry that brought his laptop in with a mouse dragging the floor.

Walking toward the hall, I wasted no time heading toward the office.

"Follow me, dude," I told Alex. "We'll take her to the lab so you can park it."

I guided Alex to my room, and motioned toward the cleanest corner of my desk. I saw the way Alex hesitated at the door, his eyes scanning the room from behind his long bangs. He set the rig down on my desk as though it were made of toothpicks, then crossed his arms and stared around the room again. I became aware again of just how ridiculous the room really was just by gauging Alex's facial expression.

"This... is really cool," Alex said. He punctuated the thought with a little nervous chuckle.

"Yeah, it's where I spend most of my time," I told him, fetching my chair. "Real exciting, I know."

"N-no, no," Alex told me, "it's awesome. I wish I had half this setup."

I nodded toward the PC he'd placed on my desk.

"Not a bad little machine you got yourself, there, man," I told him with a polite grin. "I'm guessing you're a gamer?"

Alex shrugged and offered me a little smile.

"Well, y-yeah, kind of," he replied. "I mean... I've been getting into video editing, lately. Just for fun."

I lifted my hands and spun in my chair.

"Well, this is what you've got to look forward to, my man," I told him. "With a lot of late nights and a couple tens of thousands of dollars to sink into it."

I saw Alex's eyes lift to the screens on my wall. His arms were still crossed, and he shook his head slowly, admiring the hardware.

"I'm... not really that big or anything," Alex told me.

"What do you do?" I asked him, making conversation. "YouTube? Tiktok? Or streaming?"

Alex shook his head again. "No, nothing like that yet. Just some... personal stuff. Just toying around right now, really."

It was pretty vague and weird, but I nodded.

"Alright." I glanced again at the PC he'd brought. "Did you uh, build that? Or buy it? Or what?"

Alex looked at the rig. "No I didn't build it. I bought it off of someone. Might have paid too much. It's been working great, though. Well... until a few days ago, and now it won't start up."

I peered into the glass that covered one entire side of the rig, trying to get an initial idea of the components.

"AMD? Or Intel?" I asked.

"Um... AMD," Alex answered. "I think. Is it... something you could fix?"

I shrugged. "Well, to be honest, I'll just have to troubleshoot it a bit. Might take a little TLC and some time. I'll have to plug it in here, see what it's doing, start going down the list."

"Okay," Alex said. He paused, making a little face. "Is it... gonna cost a lot?"

I waved a hand at him and relaxed back into my chair.

"No, man," I told him. "We might have to order a new part or something like that, but I'm not gonna charge you for doing something to it. You're okay with leaving it here, though? It might take me a little while. I can bring it back to work for you. If it's something simple, it could be as early as tomorrow?"

I let the idea settle in the room. Alex stared at the PC, chewing his lip. I hadn't seen him outside of work, ever. The shirt he wore was tight and small, the sleeves barely reaching down over his shoulders. The skinny jeans he wore had a hole in one leg, high on the thigh. It was always interesting to see a coworker outside of our natural habitat.

"Y-yeah, I can leave it with you," Alex said. "Can you let me know what's wrong with it?"

I nodded. "Sure thing. If we gotta order something, I'll just order it and you can get me back sometime. No big deal."

Alex nodded, shifting his weight as he spoke.

"That's cool, thanks," he said. "There's just some things on there I don't wanna lose, like... important things. If nothing else, I'd like to get the data off of it."

I shrugged. "Shouldn't be a big deal. But I'll let you know."

Alex nodded. "Thanks for doing this. I know it's kinda out of left field, but... I just need it to work."

I acted casually, waving a hand at him and reassuring him I was fine with looking into the rig. I couldn't be sure, but Alex seemed a bit on edge. I didn't truly know the guy, but there was something left unsaid. He had hesitated when I told him he could leave the machine with me, and the way he talked was... off, somehow. I silently hoped I wasn't about to be a guest on a news program, talking about how I discovered my coworker was a serial killer and how gruesome the evidence had been.

"I'll get you fixed up, man," I told him. "Or I'll do my best. It just might take some time."

Alex nodded and stuffed his fingers into the pockets of his skinny jeans.

"Totally," he said. Alex was already half turning toward the door. "Just let me know?"

I stood and smiled at him. I rose to my feet.

"Sure thing, dude," I said.

Alex stood there for several seconds, biting his lip and nodding. He glanced at the PC several times and looked around the room in admiration of the setup I had. I wondered if I should walk him out or invite him to stay and hang out for a while, or what the next move should even be. I even thought about showing him some of the video editing I'd been doing. Maybe we had more in common than I thought.

Then, Alex gave me a bit of a wave and a smile.

"Anyway, I gotta go," he told me. "But... I'll see you at work tomorrow?"

"Yeah, definitely, man," I said. "I'll let you know something."

"Really, thanks for this, Gavin," Alex said, turning toward the door.

"Don't mention it," I said.

Alex left the room, and I heard the front door easing shut just seconds later. I actually cursed myself for not offering Alex to stay. He seemed to keep to himself mostly at work, but he really wasn't a bad guy. Maybe I just had too much of a soft spot. I shrugged it off and turned back to my screens, trying not to dwell too much on anything. There was only a little bit of work left before I finished Dizzy's video. It would be nice to put the forty-five minute video to rest before focusing all my attention on Alex's PC. Workflow was important. If I let myself get too distracted, it would throw a wrench in the spokes of my schedule.

****

It grew very late before I made time to look at Alex's computer. I still needed to review the work I'd completed on the video I'd edited, but I needed my eyes to be fresh for that. No sense in rushing something out to Dizzy with errors rampant throughout. It made more sense to come back to the finished product another time.

I turned my attention to the PC that was sitting lifeless on my desk. It wasn't the most powerful rig I'd seen, but I could tell Alex spent some money on this thing when he'd bought it. Probably too much money. I'd met plenty of people like him before, those that bought the most expensive sounding tech without truly knowing anything about the specs or what it was capable of. I dug out some extra wires and cables and plugged the thing into one of my extra monitors on the wall.

Glancing at the time display on my own computer, I knew I should be in bed. I had work tomorrow after all, but I didn't sweat it. I did better on less sleep anyhow. Thankfully, it didn't take very long at all to diagnose Alex's problem. I went through a few checks, but wound up digging through my closet that was full of random tech and spare parts. I found a set of new RAM sticks that were never even taken out of the package. Maybe they were left over from a new PC build I was asked to do a while back, but in any case, I was glad to have the extras, because it did the trick.

It took only a few minutes to remove the old parts from Alex's computer and install the new ones. I did take the time to clean the rig up a bit and tie up some stray cables while I was poking around in the case. I pushed the power button and the machine whirred to life. Staring at the screen, I was happy to see all of the images and logos appear across the monitor.

I settled in, plugging in a mouse and my keyboard to the computer. Clicking through a few settings, I made sure everything was reading properly and no other components appeared to be having problems. I smiled at the wallpaper of the anime girl behind the plethora of shortcuts on the desktop. Alex and I sure were different.

That should have been the end of it then and there. The computer seemed to be in working order now. My curiosity got the better of me, and I started browsing through Alex's computer to see what he was into. There were dozens of shortcuts to games on the desktop. That much I expected. Half of them I'd never heard of before. I remembered Alex mentioning video editing, and my curiosity took me deeper. Maybe I could look at something he'd worked on. I could even give him pointers or strike up a conversation with him about it.

There was nothing of any significance in his video folder. Most of his pictures seemed mundane or were artwork from some anime film that I wasn't familiar with. Nothing really caught my eye. As if Alex would come bursting through my door, I glanced over my shoulder. I knew what I was doing was wrong. I shouldn't be snooping through someone else's computer without their knowledge, but I was alone. There was no one to answer to, and it gave me sort of a thrill to peek into Alex's personal things.

I browsed the computer for several more minutes and grew bored, so I clicked away all of the windows I'd opened, returning me to the dozens of shortcuts. I was about to reach for the power button when my eye caught a glimpse of a singular folder on the desktop. Everything else was either a game or a program of some kind. This was neither. It wasn't even a shortcut to another file. It was just a lone folder in the middle of the sea of other icons. The title was what particularly caught my eye.

My Stuff