All Comments on 'Kissing in Dreams'

Excellent story please continue. Its good to see them battle their emotions as they go forward instead of just doing it. To truly love someone there are times when you make a decision that is more painful just trying to protect the one you truly love even if it means heartache for both of you. Here you are dealing with real life and not a fantasy.

More than a tale of incest, this is actually a beautifully realized romance. You've evoked a warmth of characterization that's all too rare on this site. I congratulate you on an auspicious beginning and look forward to reading more of your work.

who the hell starts a story in the middle? wheres the character development? wheres the background? where the hell is the plot? you need to start at the beginning and work forward developing the characters and plot pulling us in as you go not driving us away with plot holes and no background. who are they and why should we care about them. this sounds like chapter two not one delete and rewrite and start at the beginning not in the middle as is it totally sucks.

Did on this one. They just didn't fall into bed like some bad porno. I liked the characters and this was as much romantic as taboo. The dialogue wasnt corny and cheesy, and the sex was hot while not being the "do me harder" variety. Thank you.

Don't believe the "totally sucks" comment. This is an interesting piece. It's okay for a story to start in the middle, or anyplace else. And characters are developed as much by the reader as the writer. You're talented. Write.

Your writting was incredible, enough depth to the caracters to satisfy, while allowinng the mind of the reader to fill in the picture...keep up the story telling, perhaps even expand this one. Please keep writing

Excellent . . . says it all

this is your first story? wow. pretty good. a lot of detail in just 4 pages. I would have read more gladly. wasn't crazy about the last page, but it still wasn't bad; fit the story.

Don't pay attention to Mr. anonymous 'piece of crap'. Likely an author with stories on here never getting above a 2!

Your story was beautiful. The love and innocence was perfect. There was no need for backstory, the reader got the idea along the way. EXCELLENT read, and I look forward to more pieces by you

I usually get on here to see what ideas go through peoples heads but this was absolutely beautiful you have done an excellent job with it you can write a bloody book with this

Not a bad story. Not a bad story at all. I do thoroughly love your colorful language; much better than what I usually read here, and I appreciate it. Thought patterns were spot on. Your characters had the perfect blend of curiosity, restraint, eagerness, and desire, making for a pretty good read. And now, on to the not so good stuff. I think, although you did fairly well with your characters, you could have done a little more in the way of developing them. Place? Time? History? You mention the twins' little escapades. That could have been a good jumping off point. They have no past, and an uncertain future. Kinda iffy to me. But that's my only complaint. For a first story, a brilliant job. Bravo, and I look forward to more.

( ***** )=1 of the best reads ever. more of this quality plz gl

Liked how your story picked up in the middle. It lets you have a prequel or sequel. Sibling development was top notch. Keep writing and let us know what happens to them.

I generally agree with KaIisBack, and with the Anonymous who spoke of the siblings battling their emotions. We get so little of that in the stories here, that it is good to be reminded of the tensions that come from fears of social stigma as well as the joy of giving in to the desires of the body, especially in partners with little experience in life. I hope there will be a sequel here, to tell how our heroes cope with the problems that arise. A fine beginning.

A worthy addition to the upper end of the stories on Literotica. This is one of the best I've read in quite a while. Keep writing!

--CarlusMagnus

Loved it, can't wait for the next one, when she's pregnant!

This is a really fine story written and edited by real guys who knows everything about writing on love subject. This is a story which has hope for tremendous success in future chapters. Don't stop here and post another chapters and I am sure that your next chapters will do much better. Hats off to you man you posted your first story with real stuff.

I love stories where there's that something special between them. The feelings for each other go deep, burns within, and are truly everlasting. More times than not, the females are the smart ones. They let their emotions/feelings guide them and are able to communicate why the taboo should be ignored. After reading the well written stories, I feel like I know the characters and wish the woman was someone I had met during my lifetime. The related factor fades away.

Very rarely do I find a story as amazing as yours on a site like this. More than just an aid to get my rocks off, as I read Kissing In Dreams, I was completely pulled in to the world of the characters. Your writing is incredibly vivid, and it made it all feel so real! I literally almost cried at Emma's reaction to their first time. It all reminded me of times in my life when I've had to endure heartbreaking loss, and your story brought all those emotions to the surface. I loved that the incest aspects took a backseat, and that their love for one another was the real focus of the story. Anyway, I'm gonna stop gushing before I embarrass myself further, but I felt that all this needed to be said. Congratulations on an amazing first story, and best of luck on your future endeavors! P.S. PLEASE MAKE MORE!! The open-endedness of the twins' story allows for the opportunity to make this an entire series of short stories, or even an entire novel. Regardless of how erotic any possible future tie-ins you make are, you can bet that I'll probably read them all. Yes, you're writing is that amazing. Anyway, thanks for the wonderful story, and please keep up the great work! :)

Not enough writing like this here. Need more!!!

the morons who tell you what you "should have done." this story is a masterpiece, beautifully written from top to bottom, with great psychological insight. it's not porn; it's high level erotic literature. i don't know whether you want to / ought to try a chapter 2; it's entirely up to you as the author, and not the second-guessers. it's just about perfect the way it is, imho

In-freaking-credible! As so many others have said, the incest takes a back seat to the romance, to the point where it almost but not quite becomes incidental to tje story. The way the characters deal with the emotions at each point along the way is both touching and fascinating. Your use of phrasing is outstanding. I think my favorite was, "But inspiration seems to have fled and taken hope with it." That was simply one of the best sentences I've ever read anywhere. You developed the characters and their relationship just enough to let the reader fill in the rest, which sometimes is better as t allows the reader to feel like part of the story. There were a few mechanical flaws, but they were so minor I don't even remember what they were. I wouldn't mind finding out what happens with them later, but the story easily stands alone as is. Either would be fine. Great job!

This story has a believable romantic dynamic and the dialogue is spot on. Maybe this is just something that I found to not to be realistic and that's this guys constantly dribbling, bubbling cum. I can understand him having precum appearing when he's excited, but cum doesn't just ooze out from a guy. It requires an orgasm. The prospect of this guy walking around with his shorts full of cum was gross. I just kept wondering when he would go see a urologist for a diagnosis and treatment.

I just want to say i enjoyed reading this. I do hope you will be posting a sequel soon?

You are one of the best romance writers I've read. You definitely have the potential to write some of the best bro/sis stories on this site. The romance u set up is very well written and expressed. Please keep writing. There's been great writes on here who've disappeared like shiggymoto, pacofear, texasrefugee...please please keep writing. The deftly touch w which you write a romance story allows the emotions to jump of the page as tug at our heart trings.

Wow. Just wow.

You write about the relationship between them with the insight of knowing how love expresses itself, no matter the guise it takes. This is an assured and beautifully told story, in which pictures are painted that take the reader's imagination by storm. I can only guess that experience made this possible – which makes this even hotter. The sex, by the way, is scorching, because of the context.

You've revealed the characters by degrees and with subtlety, so that we feel that we come to know them intimately through the dialogue and the plot. It's an amazing well-crafted story.

Readers: If you only read one story, read this one. It's the best.

so how much did you pay for all the rave reviews on a subpar story? this COULD have been a good story IF you had given the proper background and character development. why should we care about characters that you care so little about that they don't get any background or development? you need to tell us who they are why they are there and where there is. would you read a book if the first chapter was missing? NO! would you watch a movie if you got there an hour late? NO! so why post only the middle of a story. IF you want to improve as a writer ignore the kissasses and listen to the complainers that is the only way you will ever improve, and you really need to improve.

Words fail to capture my thoughts. The story captures the anguish of the girl leaving her love just 'coz society says so.

This is heartbreakingly beautiful.

You really must write more stories. You are a natural. Your bio says something about learning the craft. My dear fellow, you need no lessons. You are a master already.

I am weeping at the beauty of this story. I can pay you no higher compliment than to say your style reminds me of my own. Hell, I couldn't have done better myself. This is WONDERFUL.

Grant and Emma: long may they love!

This is truly a worthy addition in the list of best stories of literotica ever. You are a born writer and don't need any training. You have submitted the best story in debut hatsoff. I am a professional writer and giving you advice that please keep writing and submit another chapter in this story. I want to read more.

This damn computer or whatever won't let me vote.

A darling, daring job H-T.

That sort of sibling love deserves glorification.

if you were smart you would delete this so called story and not post anymore until you are willing to do it properly, start at the beginning and move forward. if you had added a page of build up before this and a second chapter to finish it off it MIGHT HAVE BEEN WORTH READING. starting in the middle and not finishing a story turns serious readers off. never listen to the hacks you consulted on this story they can't do their own stories very well so how can they help you.

The "delete this so called story" moron below has struck again!!! What a loser! Don't even know what it was talking about. It started drivelling on about sub-par this and what you should do if you were smart that... I dunno, I tuned out after a bit. Typical softcock, complaining and seeming like it wants it's fucking money back from a free site. Idiot.

Please ignore this moron (it's obviously the same person). if he offered constructive criticism, it would be a different matter, but as it stands, this idiot should be barred from breathing............................

first, we all have the right to our opinion . I didn't like the ones who thought it wasn't (there cup of tea ) .I loved the story ,the love, innocent's between them , they were made for each other. (call me sick in head , if you want ) .I am 55 years old, I have found that if you let someone or society rule your life in any fashion you mite as well bend over and let them fuck you the rest of your life. I am done with you motherfuckers who think the world rotates around you .you are not going to stop me from reading about this subject with your asshole comments . if you don't like it ,don't read it . I don't see anybody holding a gun to your head and making you

This had everything I want in a story: characters I care about, convincing dialogue, believable motivation, great scene-setting and thoughtful use of language. I just hope you keep writing. If so, you have a faithful reader in me.

great story please write more. please lol

This is the most romantic incest story I've read! I really like how they are like meant for each other. In some ways, this is my favorite story of all time, but I think it's not finished.

So please write another chapter, and if you will, make her pregnant!

I've read quite a few stories on here and I have to say that this one is by far the best. You have a great talent in the way you brought in their life as normal siblings wrestling about and then took them through their curiousity of each other and then through a beautiful series of growing into each other. I love it.

...How fucking relieved I am to find this story again. I had read it almost two years ago but couldn't find it ever since. Two years and the story still sticks to my heart like glue. Two years and I'm doing my little jigs in joy.

Beautiful. Just beautiful. That's what I can say about it. You hit the right chords with me. Thank you sooooo much for sharing this story.

You have definitely earned a 5* and a favourite from me. God bless you and I hope you keep on writing these type of stories.

Bard

serious readers of erotica ( not the underage wanker kiss asses here) want complete stories that background, character, development, plot and a proper end this had none of those. listen to the complaints if you want to improve it's the only way you will.

the story was simply amazing. What I don't understand are some of the comments such as: "you need to tell us who they are why they are there and where there is." They are siblings Emma and Grant, they are there because their parents decided to buy/rent that particular house on that particular street and "there" could be ANYWHERE, for example First Avenue in L.A., WHO CARES about their location? Everyone with half brain can find all the background needed to understand the story between the lines. And character development was 1000x better than in many other stories, actualy one of the best. (hey and I did not receive a penny for this comment):-)

Pity, the writer didn't posted anything else for 2 years, so we lost him. I can only hope he had more important reasons to leave than a few comments from reader/s without their own imagination.

the Anony-mouse pestering about not having enough details are the one and the same. Talk about lifeless critters on internet....

Great story. Great characters. Well-written.

I gave this a 5 star.

It deserves nothing less.

I don't even know if the author will read this; I certainly hope he will. The story was beautiful. Not perfect, but nonetheless touching. And damn, this is the first time that I actually wished, REALLY wished, for a happy ending. Because I wasn't quite sure that there would be one

I'll give the acrinomynous comments (which are from one and the same person, that's pretty obvious) the briefest of attention. This is not a novel, but a short story. It's an entirely different set of dynamics. And there are no fixed rules how a story should be written. What's important is that it captivates the reader. And that it did.

Which brings me to the one point of criticism that I have. The description of cum and pre-cum was a bit excessive, even by Literotica standards, and nearly grossed me out.

And that's a pity, because the use of language, dialogue, pacing and story arc, they blended together really well.

One last thing: please, do write more, or at least let us know you didn't walk under a bus or something. It's almost heartbreaking that you published only one story and one poem.

Thank you for the kind and articulate comments. They are much appreciated. I was interested to read your criticism of the descriptions of 'excessive' cum and pre-cum. You are not the first person to complain of it here, so I thought I'd address it.

Both my lover and I become extremely well lubricated when aroused. I drizzle profusely when I'm turned on and her juices will actually flow in streams down her thighs when her engines are gunning. There honestly was not the slightest shred of exaggeration in my description.

She's told me that past lovers have complained of this, which I found bewildering. For me, it's an obvious sign of her stimulation and thus an intense aphrodisiac for me. I could happily wallow in her nectar seven days a week and luckily for me, the sight of my thickly glazed cock seems to make her happy as well.

So, as is often the case with sex (and so much of life), what sparks one person can leave another completely flat. Sorry it turned you off.

As for writing new yarns, I would love nothing more. Life became a good deal more complicated since I wrote this story, including a return to school. I simply haven't the time to devote to writing for pleasure at the moment.

Since my near future goals include further schooling as well as emigrating to another country, I'm afraid it may be a couple more years before I can get back to penning more stories for Lit, but it's definitely in my plans. In the meantime, you might take a look at my list of favourite stories. it includes a wide variety of genres and writing styles, so I'd be surprised if you couldn't find something to suit your taste.

Thank you again for the kind words.

Incest stories ain't usually my thing. But I liked the 1-page story you wrote enough to give this a try. I was actually stunned by how moving it turned out to be. Hell, by the end, I couldn't believe how invested I was in the characters and their predicament. I found myself really caring whether or not the two of them got together somehow. Keep up the excellent work. I hope we haven't heard the last of you.

I said 5 stars. If I could suggest one improvement it would be more. To put it quite .--I want more of the story.

please, there has to be more to this lovely story

... as far as I'm concerned!

In just the first few paragraphs, the reader can certainly figure out how close these two siblings are. What they've been through in their young lives, and how much they mean to each other.

Their emotions, their love for each other, made far more of an impression than the actual act of sex between them. And how much it almost tore them apart.

And their decision to leave together was the final result.

I do have to agree on one thing, the amount of this young man's leakage. It just doesn't happen that way.

Great first story.

Ignore the dipsticks.

Awesome! Being a big fan of kissing...a lot of KISSING....I loved this...and very well written.

Loved it. Loved the connection the twins had and their realisation of their love for each other.

Deserves a follow up chapter.

Good story, but I sincerely hope your dick doesn't function like that, dude.

too cute

i am so emotionally touched...

this is so beautiful....

thank you

And the buildup -- up until the actual fucking -- was lovely. But the fucking scene, and what followed it, lacked details that would have made it outstanding. The whole scene where she took his cock and rubbed it on her pussy went by much too fast before actual insertion. There needed, in my view, to be a lot more pre-insertion manipulation, reluctance about going further, discussion about how it felt to him, how it felt to her, how much each one 'needed' it, 'wanted' it, and just 'had to have it', trying other things -- blowjob and pussy eating -- first, to try to solve their 'need', etc.

The pregnancy was a disappointment, as much for me as for her.

Don't see any reason why they couldn't have continued other, non-fucking sexual activities before the pregnancy presented itself.

Gave it four stars. Could have been five.

The feeling that somebody understand you, it feels so good. Though this is Taboo, I know that situation. Emotional intimacy can trigger passion. Nothing is ugly in somebody you really trust.

Legend says when lovers die, they are reincarnated as fraternal twins. Through this they will never be separated in mind, body, and soul.

As for the pregnancy, they don't have to. A Companionate marriage is a better alternative.

5 stars to your lovely work

You should have put a disclaimer of 'gay male' protagonist

.1⭐️

I’m not going to read all the comments but here are a couple thoughts:

- siblings getting too close can have consequences like these. Better to spend energies developing a relationship with someone else.

- if they really want to marry in the US, a state or two will not prosecute incest and possibly permit it if one person is sterile. That said, grandma won’t be happy.

- this is well written and does a good job of capturing a loving relationship.