Les Deux Escargots

Les Deux Escargots

Ted is both freaked out and turned on by his wife's role-play

Ron Ehrs

WHEN BONNIE SUGGESTED role-playing, I was skeptical.

Although I understood how it could be fun, I was not the most imaginative person. When I heard "role-playing," I thought of some clichéd scenario where I would be a swashbuckling pirate, and she would be the aristocratic young woman captured from some British port whom I would get to ravish. It would all feel totally lame, and even if I could come up with some lines, it certainly would not make me horny. I would just feel stupid, as if I was being transported back to childhood and acting in some elementary school play.

Then Bonnie explained her idea, which was different. Instead of playing stock characters, one or the other of us would pretend to be a person we both knew, and whose personality we were acquainted with. That person would then come on to whoever was the "real" person and we would play it out from there.

Seeing that I looked a bit uncertain, she suggested that we begin by having me play my boss, who happens to "drop by" one morning while I was away. She, of course, would be the housewife doing her normal housewife stuff, and not expecting anyone.

She suggested that we do Saturday morning for our first try.

"But Saturday is my golf day," I said. I wanted to put my foot down about my weekly opportunity to hang out with the guys, but I sensed this was not the time.

"This is important, Ted," she said. "We hardly ever get a chance to do something special together on the weekends. You can skip one Saturday for this. For me?"

She told me to wear my most formal suit and tie, and go off for a 15-minute drive, and then come back and knock on the door.

* * *

Saturday morning, I followed her instructions. She told me to wait for her to go to the kitchen before I put on my suit, and then sneak out the front door without her noticing.

I did so. I put on my black suit (which I usually only wore to funerals and very formal events) and a new dark tie I hadn't worn yet, and headed out. I drove around for more than 15 minutes -- I was still nervous about this whole thing, and by no means convinced it was a good idea. Finally, I had to stop procrastinating and I pulled into our driveway and walked up to the front door.

I had no idea what would happen next. I was kind of afraid that Bonnie would answer the door in some thin bathrobe or something, like one of those pizza delivery porn scripts, and a total turnoff.

I knocked, and when the door opened, there was Bonnie, not wearing a bathrobe, but just a pair of extremely short shorts I had never seen before, and a rather tight T-shirt that did nothing to hide the fact that she was not wearing a bra. I had almost forgotten what an amazing body she had -- and what an amazing rack.

I wasn't expecting this at all. She never dressed like that around me. Seeing her in that outfit surprised me, but it was also a lot sexier than I could've imagined.

"Mr. Madison? Hi. Good morning. Can I help you?"

"Hi, Mrs. Hale. I was looking for Ted. Is he around?"

"Gosh, no Mr. Madison. Ted left about a half hour ago to go golfing with his buddies. He probably won't be back till late afternoon. Would you like to come in for some coffee or something? I just made a fresh pot." She stepped back to let me in.

I walked in, and she led me to the living room and motioned for me to have a seat on the couch.

Was I really supposed to be okay with the idea that my wife was inviting my boss, who she'd only met at one or two office parties, to come into the house while I was away? While she was dressed in those shorts and, well, no bra? I mean I knew this was supposed to be just role-playing, but maybe it would've been better if we had just stuck to pirates and stuff. At least that way there wouldn't be anything to weird me out.

When I sat down on the sofa, Bonnie was still standing. She asked, "I can get you some coffee, Mr. Madison. Or, if you'd prefer, I can get you something a little stronger." She smiled and...

Holy shit. Did she just shimmy her tits at me? It was so quick, I couldn't be sure. It felt like one of those subliminal flashes that advertisers use in movies. I tried to remember if she had ever shimmied her tits at me before. I didn't think so, not even when we were back in college. I probably didn't even know she could do that. Was she doing that because I was my boss? Or maybe just because it wasn't me? I didn't like either of those ideas.

"It's pretty early in the morning for me, Mrs. Hale," I said.

"Please, call me Bonnie. I'm not a very formal person."

"Well, in that case, I guess you should call me Bill."

"Bill? You seem more distinguished than that. Can I call you William instead?"

Jesus. What the hell? She was being awfully damn nice to my boss.

"And as far as what time it is, Ted and his buddies spend hours at the 18th hole as soon as they finish their game of golf. To tell the truth, sometimes he comes home pretty sloshed and falls right over, and it's not even 5 o'clock."

Dammit. That wasn't true at all. Sure, I would have a drink or two with my buddies after playing golf, but it wasn't like that at all. Why was she telling my boss these stories behind my back?

"Well, in that case, I think I wouldn't mind a drink. Heck, go ahead and make it a double. Whatever kind of Scotch you have is fine."

"That sounds good, William. I think I'll have the same."

Was it my imagination, or did she just shimmy her tits again? I really needed that drink. And what was my wife doing, drinking a double Scotch at this hour? Did she do this all the time?

* * *

I listened to the noises from the kitchen. I heard Bonnie getting glasses down from the cabinet, opening the freezer door, and dropping ice cubes into the glass. Then I heard her pouring Scotch into the glasses.

I expected her to come out, but she was still busy with something. This made me really nervous. Was she going to come back into the living room completely naked? I definitely was going to have a problem with that.

When she came back in, holding the two glasses, she was still fully clothed -- at least as fully clothed as she could be in that outfit. I couldn't take my eyes off the motion of her tits as she walked. But there was something else. She had had her hair up in back when I came in, but now she had let it down, reminding me how amazing her long blonde hair looked with her bright blue eyes.

Under the circumstances, she was looking entirely too good. She never looked that good for me. Did she? And I couldn't quite tell, but it was looking to me as if her nips were sticking out more as well. Somehow, I was getting upset and horny at the same time.

She handed me my glass and sat down beside me. Not at the other end of the sofa -- a lot closer than that. Almost...intimately close? Much too close for her to be sitting beside my boss, who she barely knew at all.

"Ted's a great guy," I said, taking a drink from my glass. "You're a lucky woman.... And he's lucky to have you," I added, unable to take my eyes off her nips as they stood up perkily, shouting for attention.

"He is a great guy," Bonnie said, taking a stiff drink. "Of course, you know how it is. I mean we've been married a long time and...well maybe he doesn't pay as much attention to me as he used to. When we met in college, we were pretty hot and heavy. But now... Well, sometimes we go as long as a month without...you know. And, even though I'm getting older -- I'm getting close to 40 -- a girl still has needs."

"You don't look anywhere near 40," I said. "I would have thought you were in your 20s."

"William, I wish that were true." She looked at me. "Of course, I'm sure you don't have that problem in your marriage. You're much too...I definitely shouldn't say this, but you're too sexy to let things fall into a routine."

What the hell? Now she was complaining about our marriage behind my back? A month? I mean I knew there had been the occasional week here and there, but a month?

And flirting with my boss? Part of me wanted to put a stop to this whole thing now. But the other part of me was distracted by her tits and her nips, and was trying to figure out how to get to them. Was she complaining, or was she coming on to me? I took another drink of my Scotch.

We sat there in silence for a moment. Then Bonnie continued, "I know I had met you at Ted's office parties, but I hadn't realized how interesting you were. I don't remember getting to meet your wife."

"Well," I said, "she doesn't come to many of the office parties. She's busy with a lot of things, you know charity work, garden club, book club. I mean it's fine, but you know, we're both...busy. You know how marriage is."

"I do know," Bonnie said, edging closer on the sofa. She looked at my glass. "Why don't I get us another round and we can keep talking. This is all very fascinating."

She got up and headed back to the kitchen with our glasses in hand. I watched her ass twitching as she walked. Her very cute ass.

I heard the sound of fresh ice cubes popping into our glasses, and then heard her getting the bottle of scotch and pouring another round.

She came out carrying the two glasses, which looked possibly even fuller this time. Of course, I was watching her tits bounce, but it also seemed she was doing a lot of shimmying along the way. Was the Scotch getting to her too?

I was getting ridiculously horny, but I had no idea about how I was supposed to make a move on a "happily" married woman.

She sat down right beside me this time, her leg rubbing against mine as she sat there. She handed me my glass, and raised hers as a sign for us to toast. I clinked my glass against hers as she said with a big smile, "A toast to us. New best friends."

* * *

Everything about this situation was screaming at me. Between the Scotch and her leg rubbing against me and her nips yelling at me and her big smile, I just wanted to grab her and say, "Bonnie, let's go upstairs and fuck right now! Forget the role-playing. I don't care about any of it! You got me so horny I can't stand it!"

But I knew that would be 100% wrong. It would totally piss her off. She was enjoying the hell out of this whole thing, and if I spoiled it, we sure weren't going to be heading up to the bedroom anytime soon. Maybe not ever. At the same time, I had no idea how to proceed in this kind of situation. I wasn't that kind of guy. Did that mean I was a good guy...or a wimp? I took another big drink, hoping it would help me figure things out.

I watched Bonnie take another big swig of her drink, put her glass on the coffee table, and then, seemingly accidentally, let her hand fall on my thigh.

I knew she was wanting me to do something, but I didn't know what. What I wanted to do was just yank up her shirt and start sucking on her hard nipples. I was pretty sure that wasn't what she wanted.

I had hoped the Scotch would help me figure things out, but it wasn't helping my thinking at all. Finally, I did the only other thing I could think of. I turned towards her and leaned my face towards her face to kiss her.

Suddenly, she was kissing me passionately, running her tongue all around inside my mouth, and pulling me against her as hard as she could. I hadn't felt this from her in years, maybe even decades. This felt even better than getting to suck on her tits.

She kept holding me tight and rubbing her tits against my chest. She began turning her body and moving one leg over mine, rubbing her crotch against my leg.

"Oh my God, Will, you are so sexy. You make me so hot," she was whispering into my ear. She kept rubbing herself against my leg, and began sticking her tongue in my ear. "I think it's time to go up to the bedroom, don't you? We'll be a lot more comfortable there."

"But..." I started to say. What was I going to say? What about your husband? I'm a married man? With all that Scotch, I was having a hard time thinking at all.

"Shhhh," Bonnie said, putting her finger against my lips. "Don't talk."

She stood up and took my hand and pulled me up from the sofa. I was a little off-kilter from all the Scotch, and was hoping I wouldn't fall over. But I managed to stay standing and follow her to the stairs. She led the way up, holding my hand, while I watched the movement of her ass the whole way.

She led me into the bedroom -- our bedroom, you know the one for Ted and Bonnie, not for Will and Bonnie. She quickly pulled the covers down and then turned to me and began pulling off my tie and unbuttoning my shirt. I managed to get my suit jacket off and let it fall to the floor. By now she had pulled my shirt up out of my pants and was unbuttoning the final button. Then she reached down for my belt and unbuckled it while I pulled my shirt off and let it fall to the floor. She unzipped my pants and let them fall. I kicked off my shoes and stepped out of my pants. All that was left was my socks and my boxers. I yanked off my socks, and then paused to see what Bonnie was doing.

She was standing there watching me. I reached over and pulled up her T-shirt and she pulled it over her head and tossed it on the floor. Her tits had never looked this sexy to me before, and I don't know if her nipples had ever stood out that hard.

I was going to reach for her shorts next, but she beat me to it. She pulled them down and left them on the floor. She wasn't wearing any panties. Then she reached back over to me and yanked down my boxers and I kicked them to the floor.

We were both breathing heavily. Bonnie kneeled down in front of me. "You have a beautiful cock, Will."

Between the Scotch and the weirdness of the situation, I was barely at half-mast, but Bonnie immediately leaned forward and took me in her mouth. She was sucking on me eagerly. It was incredibly hot to see her sucking on me that way. And sure enough, very quickly I was as hard as I could ever remember being.

I pulled her up and kissed her again as hard as I could. I let her fall back on the bed and kneeled down between her legs and began rubbing my face in the fine blond hair of her bush. Then I moved my face down and began eating her frantically, sucking on her mound, sucking on her lips, sticking my tongue inside her and playing with her and feeling her and tasting her. I kissed my way back up and began sucking on her swollen clit. Her hips were moving up against my face and I felt my whole face getting wet with her juice. I heard her saying, "Oh my God, Will, I'm coming! You're so good! I'm coming for you!" Her hips began to thrash against me and I pulled my face into her as hard as I could. I couldn't believe how much I loved turning her on this way, and feeling her totally lose control.

When she was done, she pulled herself all the way onto the bed and I hopped up beside her. She pulled me over and kissed me. "That was amazing!"

I hadn't even gotten to suck on her tits and her nipples yet. I moved my head down and began kissing her breasts and sucking her nipples and playing with her nipples with my tongue. I could feel her whole body moving as I was turning her on all over again.

"Oh God, Will, I'm so turned on! I want you to fuck me right now! Fuck me as hard as you can!"

She was spreading her legs open and I got between them, holding myself up with my arms. I moved my cock towards her pussy, and used one hand to move the head of my cock around her pussy and then up and down between her lips, feeling how wet she was.

"Yes, put it in me right now! I'm horny as hell, I want your dick all the way inside me! Fill me up with your hard cock!"

I started pushing my dick in. She was grabbing my ass, trying to speed me up. Almost immediately I was all the way inside her. She was still pulling on my ass, trying to get me inside her as far as possible.

"Oh Bonnie, you feel so good inside! You feel amazing! I love how tight your pussy feels!"

"You feel so good, Will! Fuck me hard! I want you to fuck me as hard and as fast as you can! I want to feel you shooting everything inside me!"

Normally, I would be trying hard to slow things down and make it last, but this was different. She just wanted to get fucked. Everything had become primal, and I just wanted to fuck her like a wild animal.

I began fucking her as fast and as hard as I could, pounding against her, not worrying about anything except fucking.

At that rate, it didn't take long for me to feel my balls tensing up. "I'm going to come," I said.

"Come for me! I want to feel you shooting for me right now!"

I started coming almost violently. I was pounding myself into her, shooting everything I had into her, and I felt her hips smashing into me.

"I'm coming! Give it all to me! I want all of you!"

It felt like our bodies were thrashing together for a long time. I don't think I had felt anything this intense ever.

When we finally stopped, I rolled over beside her and we just lay there holding hands. Why had we been missing this all this time?

"That was amazing, Will. I probably shouldn't say this to you, but that was the best sex of my life. I probably came three or four times."

Ummm. I was back to being confused again. Shouldn't Ted get at least some of the credit? On the other hand, Ted had never done this for her. So?

I was feeling drained and exhausted. I would've been happy to just fall asleep, but it didn't seem like a good idea just yet.

After a while, Bonnie turned on her side and started running her hand up and down my leg and up and down my body. "I love your body, Will. You are so sexy. Do you think maybe...you'd be up for another round? I mean that was amazing, but..."

Another round? Holy shit. After that? My dick was just lying there, not making a peep. I mean back in college and in the earlier days of our marriage, sure, no problem. Maybe more than that. But now? I couldn't quite remember the last time we had gone for seconds. Wasn't this supposed to be about quality, not quantity?

Bonnie's hand had been running up and down my body, but now it moved over to my cock. She took it in her hand and began playing with it. Then she sat up and moved her head down and took my cock in her mouth. I reached out and started playing with her tits while she was sucking on me.

I had been doubtful that anything more could happen, but pretty soon my dick began to appreciate the attention it was being given, and I began to feel myself getting hard again. Bonnie began sucking harder and taking as much of my dick in her mouth as she could.

As soon as I was hard again, Bonnie got up and straddled me and started sliding her pussy down on my cock. It was beautiful watching her, seeing her tits and her nipples, and watching my cock sliding into her pussy.

Once I was all the way inside her, she began moving all around, taking control of everything. She would speed up for a while, and then she would slow down and lean forward so I could suck on her nipples. Then she would move her face down and kiss me again, and then sit back up and fuck me some more.

After that first round, I was nowhere near as hair-trigger as I had been before. She kept fucking me according to what she wanted. It was trancelike, almost timeless. It was beautiful, and I felt us joining together in a whole new way.

She kept going for a long time, but then she began to speed up. I felt my body starting to tense up, and I rolled us over so I could be on top pounding her as I came.

Once again, we were both coming together, and both trying to get me in as deep inside her as possible. I began shooting everything I had, trying to fill her up, trying to be what she was wanting.

It was different from the first time, not as violent, but more connected. We were doing something new, welding ourselves together spiritually as well as physically.