All Comments on 'Liberation'

Technically Good writing, but I don't think reconciliation was the way to go.

The premise and story sounded real enough, but lacks soul. At the end, we are left not understanding or identifying with any of the characters - it went too clinical without emotions or color ( like a police report or a scientific journal )

Worst thing a man can do is take a cheating bitch back

The idea behind this story is a good one and the writing good, though a bit formulaic. But, the story itself was too dry. It lacked pathos. I kept hoping for some sort of final confrontation or closure. At least for Marge to own her outrageous mistake, tell George what influenced her thinking and that she did not want him to be a weak husband. The story could still have ended the same way, but, there would have been more passion to the story.

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I hope you continue writing.

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Pasqual

Ho hum....a boring tale of a dumb wife who believes her classmates that infidelity is ok. Her husband told her different But she went anyway. He did the right thing and divorced her. ... Nothing too exciting here, a quick look at a failed marriage.

Good story!

5

A bit like a monologue than a story, obvious ending.

These women goups actually are not about female enhancement but about screwing men over, hell of a difference

JJ

Smoozed? What is "smoozed"?

I'm still experiencing the Christmas spirit so I gave this **.

I could be off about this but why would a liberated woman go down on her knees and compliantly blow a dude if she is a strong woman. Then go on a boat the next day and service said dude and the boat captain all day???

Should have never did that to the whore. Just before his death, he should have put his hands around her neck and choked her purple, or put anti-freeze in her coffee. I would never love her again and she'd pay for my hurt- with her slutty life...

And at the end he was a weak man like the other girls husbands. Yep... Heeere cucky cucky

I guess date if you feel the need but always wear a condom, no kissing or oral, and honestly just get you pleasure and dont care about what she feels or thinks. I wouldnt be exclusive either.

Not much to say. Hits the same old notes in a hurry, and then wraps up with a lukewarm reconciliation.

It ticked the usual ' wife wants to cheat ' boxes , but it read pretty awful . Came across as more of a summary of events than a story .

What was needed was more passion and drama .

She started to realise her error , that she was just being another cum dump rather than a liberated female but did nothing about it . She still met with her so called friends and on realising what they were , did nothing about it . Her marriage gone to pot , did nothing about it .

For a woman who thought herself as strong, independent and liberated , she was pathetic .

Could not even manage to admit her errors and offer a heartfelt apology to her once loving family .

Bottom line ...... this story could have been so much more .

My advice ...... look up Saddletramp and consider a rewrite .

Boring. Just another Martian Slut Ray tale…and not that well written, either.

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2 **

The big problem with this story is she was never truly punished for her selfish life destroying decision. Yes, he divorced her, duh, but he was the one punished for her decision. She never lost her boys, she continued to make money, she continued to fuck other guys, and worst of all, never apologized ("What was there to say anyway"). She was a cold hearted bitch and the entire story was offputting because of it. Sorry.

Read like a road map, go here, then there.

Good grief. What is it with authors and small villages? You think this makes it more homey, more likeable?

If anything, it makes him less enjoyable because he glommed onto the first girl who paid him any attention instead of finding someone that he liked for who she was.

Once again we have a situation where it's "one strike and you're out"! In the real world people make mistakes all the time and it you're strong and determined you can get past the mistakes. A constant stream of infidelities is unpardonable, but one bone-head error shouldn't be the end of the world for a couple. Sometimes the mistake brings realization that it was a bad mistake and makes it more important to avoid a repetition of that error. 4*

The only thing missing from this story was her falling to the floor when she was served.

Who the hell enjoys a sad ass story like this one????? 2* for effort

Sudden ending. Not believable.

Got dizzy with the whip-sawing POV changes. Please learn how to punctuate dialog.

Realistic, if somewhat 2D, story about a honest reconciliation. I would hope that most wives of her age are smart enough and independent enough not to fall for that sexual liberation tripe, but I'm sure there are some out there that simply follow where they are lead. I thought the reconciliation and healing was very realistic, especially in the amount of time that it required.

If they always "side by side, where they always belonged" belonged together like that, then I ask you why she cheated and why he got a divorce? That doesn't make any sense, does it?

Buried together? They should have pissed on her grave.

Very stiff writing and characters.

I assume English is not your native language.

I'm not a manic for grammar, but my gracious. You've got to stop using commas all the time instead of periods. The periods provide the proper separation of thoughts.

Nice concept but poorly executed.

Samson

Brilliantly written, especially when the lightbulb goes off in Marge's head. You really never knew what you had until it's gone...! 5+++/5!!

So in the end he was a cuck after all

Good story, but he was much too amiable with the idiot , cheating wife. She didn’t deserve him back.

First part she was stupid as a rock. Second part the writer made her be very smart and intelligent. Result? A shitty story.

Ended too rapidly

Im guessing, since this was such a massive dumpster fire, that theres a chance you are arsonist.

Ohhh, this felt a bit like that "Whats my Line" game show. Did I win??

Two fools. Marge thought with her cunt, and George needed to find a set of balls. Marge's first guy, AL was a total asshole. Nothing erotic in this entire sad story.

If the story has a wimpy cuck husband who has not an iota of self-respect in him it's gotta be a "realistic" story. His wife cheated on him and shat on their marriage but none of the women he later dated could "measure up to the standard Marge set." What a "realistic" story my gawd!

Really this is an average story nothing exciting about it at all the characters were stupid and it was impossible to engage with either of them. She was an emptyheaded independent woman who pissed her marriage away for what, the sisterhood?????

What did they do for her??

Got her divorced and lonely. Dumb bitch!!!!

Scores 3/5

L_P_N, "brilliantly written?" Certainly not as regards grammar.

This story feels like it is in service of some agenda. The stories reviled as RAAC are detested primarily due to little or no consequences for cheating. In the final analysis, it comes down to why in hell would anyone take a cheater back? You never answered that question for us.

I don't have a problem with the reconciliation or the ending. Each of your sections could have been had more "showing" detail rather "telling" us. More character development would also help us understand the characters.

"I have met and dated a few women, but none of them measure up to the standard Marge set"

So, he couldn't find an entitled cheater like Marge in the lot of women he dated after his divorce?

Another case where the man's enamored with an a romanticized version of his ex-wife that never existed in the first place and consequentially never moves on with his life.

"I'm a feminist and its my body, I can do what I want with it."......"Okay fine then I'm a masculinist it's my body and I can do what I want with it also." Feminism would be a great thing if it's about actual equality and some times it is but usually it's not.

What a crappy story.... Definitely not worth a star.

I wouldn't take back Marge even just a sex buddy.

I can't get all those phallus on the boat memory out of my head.

But the wimp lost his spine in the end.

Glad this is just fiction.

Another WACC story, why would he want her back?

Sad crappy tale

Cuck

Rubbish,started off with a man of dignity,and developed in to an apology for a man.

What a whimp of a man....

0 star - just a really sad story where the skanky, slut got what she deserved and then turned into cuck/wimp crap

A wellwritten warning about the dangers of listening without asking difficult questions.

If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is, women's studies?

New age is not always the best age. Thanks for writing.

This sad tale is playing out even now.

Young women psychology work hard to marginalise men and, at the same time, complain bitterly that men don't want then except as fuck toys.

Men woke to the harsh reality that women use then crucify them on a whim.

The "New" Feminists see men as creatures slightly above subhuman if the refuse to be psychologically castrated.

Ultimately the pass into the 30's with partner, save a lesbian one, no children, no family and a future alone.

@1st century feminism is civilization's kryptonite. It's poisonous to everyone who comes into contact with it including the women who fall for it.

Disappointing and rushed ending. Like you really weren’t sure where you wanted to take it. It was good. But it could’ve been a lot better.

HEY DUMB FUCK!! Your husband George is a WIMP to, he came crawling back also.... you are a dirtball

So he was a spineless wimp after all for a backstabbing cheating slut - eff that!!!! Total unlikely story. What feminist bitch wrote this story?!

Nice story, but average.

There is a difference between feminism and hatred towards men. Feminism is legitimate, hatred is not. She let herself be dragged into hatred, and it took her a divorce to realize that she had been wrong, but she did realize it, eventually. He rekindled with her after she had dumped the other blinking idiots that had brought her into their total misunderstanding of things. He gave her (and their relationship) a second chance because he figured it was safe. And the rest of his life proved him right. George is not a wimp, he is a brave and clever man.