All Comments on 'Life's a Bitch and then You Die'

Bill was a fuckin’ wimp. Go to the hospital, document injuries, have her BBCs arrested. Restraining order against her. And fuck those two worthless kids.

Agree, would have been funny if she got knocked up too.

If there’s any justice, Tyrone would have knocked Susan up before his balls got sucked down the drain. But I mean seriously, who has a shower drain with enough suction to suck down a set of nuts? I smell a rat here. Wonder if his name is Zorran.

Thanks for the story, no1, I loved it. 5⭐️s.

Revolvers DO have their place. Especially in a desk drawer. Great story. Ole bill at least had balls, and getting your ass whipped don't mean you're a pussy. 5 stars man

Loved this. S. F.

Zorran for president...or at least attorney general.

*i wipe a tear from my eye* That was beautiful.

Much appreciated. Not too long and note too short but a perfect fit and perfect conclusion.

The wife deserved to take a dirt nap, along with the two jiggabulls. The fact that they attacked him twice he should have grown a pair bought a heater and ended all three of them, and easily got off any charges as it was self defense, the bitch must have been hit by a "stray" bullet...... and yes they not only deserve it they also deserve eternity in hell "if there is one" I for one would sleep better knowing that's exactly where they and all like them will be.

Who packs a revolver? The guy who knows he's got the only gun in the room.

Lol

Where is the next part.... Where....

Unfinished... Unsatisfactory.

Toooooo much babbling bullshit and then Fusssss.

Nothing.

Totally rushed ending.

Where are their punishment... Their lament...

Magnificent! Just the chortle I needed at the end of day.

Great read.

Bill is hitting the highway with out the wide load

I always thought it was life's a bitch and then you marry one

Feminist are able to do what they do because even amongst gonad carrying members of the male tribe we have many in our midst who have not checked their balls for a long time..some wear panties and makeup to feel in with the crowd…and the remaining have lost the ability to think rationally and have transferred permanently their grey matter somewhere in the tip of their dicks! Shortly as soon as some scientist develops a way to implant a semen/crest semen in the lab…men will be an extinct animal!

The Pinko Lefty Constabulary must be apoplectic by now. Fuck-em

I love this story and how it evokes the scorn of all the woke feminists. Yes, there is another half of the population.

The new title should be "Life's a bitch and then you marry one"

I love revolvers … never had one jam. I can’t say that for automatics!

cool story, liked it.

DG Hear

Loved your story again. Just realized the irony.of Raccoon City. Good.one.

someone who doesn't want to worry about the gun jamming ; )

I can see what you were going for but it came up short.

Too over the top to actually be amusing.

Great story. That was fun. It was easy to hate her, but the ending made it worthwhile. Not a chance it would ever happen that way, but who cares?

Sarcasm? Parody? None of the above. Just flat out stupid. Stupid. STUPID.

Great story!!! The only thing wrong is it was way too short,. Loved it. Bill can become my hero. 13 stars. ( Again, I can't count, as you may know. ) The Bear DEFINATELY approves. More, more, more please.

The BEAR

Please write a sequel to this story. I loved it

The lazy device of every writer, the cliche BBC and the pussy-whipped husband. Frankly, I expected more from you. You write very well, this was a shitpile.

Funny

I like this guy Zorran . Sounds like on of the best counselors in the LW stable. Good story.

You aren't exactly correct, at least in Michigan support can be ordered beyond age 18 if the "child" is in college, at least when I was in court years ago.

"Before he packed everything in for the day, he managed to get hold of his friend Moe, a paralegal at Skrewwum, Skrewwum and Howe for a reference to a divorce lawyer. Moe, was able to get him in to see one of the partners, Lawrence "Curley" Howe, the next day." Personally I'd take Bud and Lou over the Stooges.

"I mean REALLY! Who packs a revolver in today's world of autoloaders?!" You do realize the one big advantage of revolvers over pistols? If a pistol misfires it takes two hands and time to clear it, if a revolver misfires you just pull the trigger again. Of course I'm talking about modern double action revolvers. Thanks for the fun, but then again I'm not too it was just a fantasy, it sure didn't seem like it when I went through it. Signed: BTW

A very good story. 5 stars!

was an interesting twist. Authors should stop with the "and you'll have to pay for college" bit. It isn't true in the vast majority of states.

Anonymous 11/01/19 looks be another Susan in waiting! She is now afraid that her husband will find out that she has been screwing Tyrone’s two brothers. Her comments were just trying to save face so as Zorran says “Tell the bitch to fuckoff!”

I love when ignorant writers perpetuate the, "women biologically need more sex than a single male can provide." That may be the case in YOUR life, you dickless moron, but not for the rest of us.

Good story about taking the shrew. A little over the top, but so are most fantasy stories. Racist? I don't think so. The bbc starring in this story are exactly the same as in any LW story, here only as sex objects for degrading "inferior"White men. Nothing degrades you like.having.your wife go dark. This time the black bullies got what they deserved.

I'm sure if you try real hard you can make you next story even more racist. Hard to believe, I know.

Hey, no1...thanks for the fun addition to the pile of 'same old, same old' that clogs the files here at Lit.

Nice guy gets a reality check. His wife was a horrible individual, but his sons were complete garbage. What those 2 young men needed was a swift boot up the ass. Thanks for sharing no1specific.

No comments about this being racist. A brother is dead another maimed. Great job. 5

Damn, Anon, if you hate the stories her on Lit. so much, why do you torture yourself by reading them? As for “misogynistic”, I don’t think you understand the meaning of the word. I thought the story was a little bit over the top, but that’s what satire is about, isn’t it? But there was one thing that really, really bothered me: Zombie Polka bands? Good God, what has the world become?

Those that DON'T want to leave "EVIDENCE" behind.

is zorran a manufactured name? slap hapy papy #9

If you don't think this is funny then you had no brain cells to begin with.

You guys need to grow a sense of humor. You must think comedy is an ugly growth on humanity that should be carved out and replaced by a more sensible alternative. This story is the answer to all the husbands screwed by an unfair system that is blind to reality. The law firm of "Skrewwum, Skrewwum and Howe" was the funniest thing I've ever read. Hopefully Bill has seen the light and will take his balls from his wife's purse, take them in his own hands and get out from under the cloud of darkness posing as a wife and boys. This easily earned a 5 star.

I mean if it was funny or well written one can overlook the ridiculousness, misogynist and racist tone of the story. But it’s so poorly written and uninteresting! Only LW readers where it seems so many of the fans seems to be wounded little men would a drivel like this get such a high score.

I was laughing at the end! I assume that was intent of the story if not sorry it was to my reading pleasure!

Please keep writing and I will keep reading

This may be, hands down, one of the most ridiculous stories I've read here......I think I lost brain cells reading it.

It's called parody.

Your story has no basis in reality. What state do you live in that would let a man come into your home, assault you, fuck your wife and then punish you in court...well other than California? The only question here would have been which one of them I would have shot first. The fact this story has a rating of over four is why I give ratings little credence.

A good wheelgun will never let you down. Good story otherwise ;)

But I have a question. Why does swingerjoe continue to review comments about his comments? Then make anonymous comments supporting his comments. There was a hand signal in high school which explained swingerjoe's behavour, you point your index finger straight up on your right hand and stick your right hand thumb at 90 degrees! That is what swingerjoe is |_ (a Loser), lmao!

you are lucky!

Yes, it was over the top and chock full of clichés. The husband is/was a complete wimp, but maybe he'll do better in the future. Wife and kids had no value whatsoever. Still, Zorran was fun and the only real man in the story. Thanks for the laugh.

God bless that was awful! Awful good!

I keep thinking of all those poor slobs who've really been screwed over by their wives. This story just seems to be what they need to hear.

Sure it was make believe, but who cares. I mean really.

Write some more like this and you'll be running for president... and winning!

Jedd Clampett

Actually...

The man was hit by the "Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything" from "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" by Douglas Adams.

I think it has symmetry that he is smacked down by the meaning of life.

Jackie Robinson

And thank you for the education regarding the Zombie-Death-Polka genre. I never knew the origin of your title, and enjoyed all the different musical references in the song, especially since I love Klezmer and clarinet music. So...that is what is created at high altitudes...

If only someone could answer me why we are all here... if only there was a white mouse somewhere in the whole large UNIVERSE who could answer a simple question

The 42 throws me, probably because I am less erudite than #1spec. But I do find an Express Bus long after rush hour to be unusual! But, not as unusual as slipping repeatedly and getting your cojones caught in the drain! Especially for guys who have great rhythm.

This was actually really funny,, I thought it was going down a different road, but the good doctor saved the day hahaha.

Clearly he's old school so that explains the revolver.

Yeah! Go for Zorran. We need him as a political consultant. Think of what a hard dose of reality would do to DC........ thanks for sharing.

Yowzah yowzah yowzah!!!!

It's a feel good story about righting wrongs.

Realistically many guys have to go to ground. It's our own fault. We agreed to those changes in divorce laws. Now there seems no way to get back to parity.

Come on people.... no one caught the meaning of the bus number???

Seriously, thanks for all the comments; good and bad. If I can get you to react, I am doing my job!

No1

Hell yes...... loved the story, and then the Yul Brennner reference.... awesome. thank you

Wow, made my day. Terrible that any person would have such low self esteem but it sure saved his butt in the end with a giant push from his advisor. I am still smiling and probably will be for the rest of the day. Thanks!

Just to set the record straight, I own.....

a Beretta 96

a S&W99

a Raven in .25

and.... wait for it.... waaaaaaait.... a S&W K-Frame, Model 10 in .38 Special

this of course does not catalog long guns, shot guns, clamors, etc. etc. etc. (the last part is said in a Yul Brynner "The King and I" accent

This is a total piece of garbage and appears to have been written by a mentality deficient old male.

But I loved the 3 Stooges references! Thoroughly enjoyed this tale and I hope to read more. 5*, easy!

Ok, I'm laughing. A lot. Ok, my sides hurt!

Wimp tale

First I assumed this was high satire and parody , but after looking at today's offerings in this genre , I'm gonna reread this and try to perceive it as Truth !

Shame it's come to this , but the faggots just won't stop polluting the LW hub with garbage!

I suppose this is meant to be parody. Satire. In no way is it successful. Only those who have the empathy of a venomous snake could like it. I was surprised that the KKK did not come with their sheets to hang the first therapist and put the county court to ruin and burn. It is one of the worst I have read on here. So many hateful stereotype possible were included. Woman hater. Check. Race check. Hater of kids check. That the kids turned out the way they did was on him too. Ridiculous but so bad it just pissed me off. Actually it is the men who usually come out ahead in a divorce. Check the rates of poverty for women and kids before and after divorce. Free and reduced lunches in school after a divorce. What sex has the most cases of being abused and killed by spouses. It ain't even close guys. It is in the thousands. I do not trust the guys who like this shit. So I carry a 9 m. Slim and 3 inch barrel. I shoot with my 11 year old grand daughter teaching her how to take care of herself. Baton and gun. Gun now is a S&W M P .22 15 and will switch to the same model only in a 5.56 when she is able. I still have my S&W police 38 just for nostalgia that I got when I was in a gang in the 50s. Since I do not trust in those folks who hate others because of race, nationality, sex or whatever my weapon of choice for my defense is the Kel-Tec KSG 14 round capacity. It is a better weapon for what is needed now than anything I used in the Corps although there is some nostalgia for being able to group four rounds center mass at 800 yards. Oh well.

Very entertaining story. Thanks for sharing. I am still laughing.

OK, so I'm easy. Have to admit the dufus husband deserved the shit he allowed to accumulate in his life. A cute ending, but I suspect if the wife and son's cry big enough tears for long enough the poor schlep will relent and assume the position once again. You can't fix stupid.

Nuff said!

A 4" Colt Diamondback in .38 special. Sometimes in an ankle holster, a Colt Detective Special. Pray and spray ain't what I do!

The author wrote:

"Both Bill and Susan shook their heads up and down."

WTF? How about nodded their fucking heads? Or more succinctly, "Bill and Susan nodded." Better, "they nodded."

When you say Bill and Susan, it implies both. Both followed by Bill and Susan is redundant. Don't do that.

Wanted to give it 10 stars but couldn't. Great story

The theory around here seems to be that everyone should be done as quickly as possible. Life changing decisions, violent reactions, and revenge must all be administered while hot... Oh well that is about the comments...... The story is interesting...

Sure he finally escaped but who cares. He liked being a humiliated wimp. No man with any balls would have put up with that extreme disrespect. The Cunt and her worthless welfare scumbag lovers would be dead. Hell he could even claim self defense as her scumbag lovers more then likely had records. No that would have been a great ending. This was just a Pathetic story

I still like my title: "Life's a Bitch and Then You Marry One!"

How's that for a wicked combo?

Yes, we've all known families that operate in ways that include these dynamics -- some to a great degree. Sad but true, I had a taste of that shit sandwich in a former life (except for the fucking around -- at least she never did that to me).

Get out! Run! To hell with the cost, it will be worth it even if you have to live in your car for a while!

Loved every word of it... Read it as the author meant it to be read 5

...disguised as a story. All the usual assholes who dwell here are calling it "satire" or "humor" so they don't have to admit it's "dogshit". On the other hand, the truly damaged and moronic are claiming it to be fine literature with straight faces. I don't know which is worse.

When the wimp cuck and evil slutwife lovers come here and whinge, moan and complain about a story that most of the LW readers love and score accordingly. Funny and a great read, good to start the day off with a smile 5+++*

Let's see..... break the secon "r", add to the first "r" turning it into an "h".

Zohan 😎

have any kids that lived?

Absolutely loved it, Men get fucked by the legal system. It seems most women are phsyco these days and liberal women are the worst. Black guys just want to populate the world without taking care of the gang members they produce. God is pissed and I hope its quick and final

how is it justice for his wife and children to do him wrong all their years together, but it's two black guys who get the death penalty? Hmmm. Maybe their families need to employ Zorran. Thanks for the story. Keep writing them and I'll keep reading them.

Assholes who only laugh at their own jokes.

...the SHIT. FFGS: Five Fucking Gold Stars!

Please refer to the comment by swingerjoe. I couldn't agree more.

Had a great laugh! Thank you. Well written.

Loved this story. Puts most of the world in perspective.

But there's nothing wrong with having a big bore spin gun. Cocking the hammer back has much the same effect on the person in front of it as racking a shotgun.

Otherwise, as I said, good story :)

I enjoyed it. Very funny. Thank you for posting. Raccoon City gets such a bad rep, you know with all the zombies and whatnot...

This is so good. I will be reading again and again. Especially with all the cuckold stories on here.

Joe, it depends on the context.

In the context of the hotwife/cuckold stories where the wife needs her BBC fix, yes that is racist.

In a story that is an OBVIOUS parody, it is not.

Joe, we obviously disagree a lot, but I never thought that you weren't intelligent. If you're not just joking, and the parody here REALLY went over your head, I may need to adjust my opinion.

Bro, you had me there. Fuck that was a nice one. Maybe a bit too far, ha ha. What can I say, though, I like my bitches crispy :))

All you jagoffs should really look at the history of the word "racism" ooooohh....it's so authoritative...it just gives you a boner to throw it at people.

Fucking pathetic.

Why are you such a bunch of scared little sheep who can't see that "racism" is another commie jew made up word? You are so nutless that you can't call a spade a spade. It is a political program.

Don't you realize that in half of so-called enlightened Europe people go to jail when they cross their commie lawyers? For chrissakes wake up and smell the coffee or you're gonna end up like frenchmen and germans with a cinch around your balls and a son-in-law named hamid al jing-dong wong.

Lock 'n Load, Bitches!!

And truer to life than most would be willing to admit. Well done. PS - revolvers put big holes in people just fine.