All Comments on 'Linh'

Enjoyed it! Part 2 ?

Please contuee writing. You have a gift.

More, please, of these two.

can't wait for more submissions.

So your story is legitimately good! I look forward to seeing how you evolve as a writer over time. However, I ESPECIALLY LOVED that you covered NEGOTIATION!!!!!!!! That is excellent and it earned 5 stars automatically! Great job and keep it up!

Began well. Good storyline until they got into the hotel room.

From my perspective, things happen to abruptly. The massage, when it's a 'normal' massage was OK. But then it leaped forward, rather than nice, slow, steps. She blows him. He eats her. No real buildup to either. She didn't play with either his cock or balls to see what they felt like and to see the response she got. He didn't do any sort of caressing, just tongue in/on pussy -- boom. No buildup for the analingus either. He just did it.

No dialog between them about how their bodies looked to each other. What were her breasts like? Big? Small? Firm? Soft? What were her nipples like? Big? Small? Stiff? Sensitive?

Was her pussy shaved? Trimmed? How did she taste? Why didn't she give him some vocal encouragement and tell him what worked best for her?

Why didn't she ask him if he'd ever thought about her sexually? Since he had, assuming he admitted it, she could have explored what it was about her that he focused on. Did he jerk off to her? What was he imagining her doing to him -- or him doing to her -- when he just couldn't take it anymore and had to cum?

Frankly, I gave up midway through page 3. Lots of sex, sure. But to me, sadly, not erotic.

Could really have been a lot better.

You have a talent for story telling. Of course, it helps that you’re story is not full of typos, grammatical errors, or spell check misunderstandings. Thanks for putting in the time and effort to edit. But it is much more than just structure.

I was drawn into this tale, briefly living in the world you crafted. At one humorous point I surprised myself actually laughing out loud. And as an erotic story, it was really good. It was hot.

I will be watching for your next story, be it Jim and Linh or some other characters. Either way I expect it will be good!

You're a fantastic writer. I hope this story continues!

I enjoyed this a lot. I look forward to the next one.

Really liked the story and the characters. Like the interplay between the characters. Keep going

Beginning of it was AMAZINGLY hot...really enjoyed the story.

What a great story.

OMG - every man's dream girl (well definitely mine)

Really well written and totally erotic.

Amazing story from start to finish. You almost want to make me try my hand at it, I've had those same sort of thoughts you expressed in the opening, though I may try my hand at a erotic game instead. Anyway, loved this story.

Thank you for this story. Finally, a story that captures the subtle nuance that domination isn't about taking, but giving, and the ultimate importance of trust & responsibility.

Wow, you sure started your story-writing career with a bang. This was an excellently told story. Everything about it. The writing is good, the sex scenes are great, and I like both your characters. To me, that's a big part of it -- when the characters have sex, I want to want them to have sex. I need to be invested. You built this up nicely.

The story plays on a lot of different themes, like dominance and submission, first time anal, some romance, mature, that are very appealing and deftly woven together.

The sex passages are very well done. You weave together the right amount of physical description with dialogue and plenty of narrative about how Jim feels. Through dialogue you reveal how Linh feels and who she is as a person.

I was totally turned on by Linh. That's a key to a good story like this one. It was very easy to imagine being in Jim's position and being driven wild by her.

I found this story because I am in the process of writing an Anal story and wanted to do some research by reading some other anal stories from the last 12 months and I'm very glad I picked this one.

Great job!

Enjoyed this very much. Nothing like a hot and sexy Vietnamese fuck buddy.

Excellent start to your writing career. Serious contender for the 2021 awards. See there's a part 2 but hope you'll be writing more here.

Well....I wonder why they stop at 5 stars. I read your prelude and wondered if I wanted to continue. You may as well go and scratch it out. I have never been comfortable about dominating a female and still am not. You very cleverly took a nice slow build up and dragged us in. Brilliantly descriptive, but also gentle and caring, I liked the way you showed the perspective from both sides. I would love the chance to be in this position in real life, even if just once. Your writing brought that fantasy to reality in my head. Just excellent. A.

Fantastic! I keep coming back to this and it never gets old. Very hot!

Incredible! Very well written. This could easily become a series.

Lovely premise.

Well written.

Sex lacks details though.

The first time she touches his cock it's during the massage. Not nearly enough in the way of exploring/playing/teasing his cock and balls while she learned about it/them. She should have handled him and teased him learning about what he liked and enjoying his rapture. That didn't happen.

Ditto re subsequent sex scenes.

Four stars. Being generous.