All Comments on 'Listen When Sibyl Speaks Pt. 04'

This story has been one of the ones here on Lit recently that I'd get excited over new chapters being posted, regardless of how small a niche it may have been filling in audience desires. That being said, I can't help but feel like this one chapter was a bit lackluster in comparison to its predecessors. The first bit of it was fine, but then I got this feeling of a rushed ending for the latter portion with seemingly lacking detail in areas where I wanted more. Additionally, I couldn't help but feel like a good bit of Deus ex Machina was thrown in here just to provide an opportunity for a closer, but that could just be me. Granted, there is no definitive statement that this story is the last we'll see of these characters (I'd say there was ample room left to create a spin-off of this series with some recurring faces as well as new ones in the form of a story about the goddesses' colonization of their new world), but the final sentence has a clear ring of finality to it in association with the title.

So, I'll say this to you, GeneraZ. Overall, your story was very interesting, and I'll definitely be looking out for other works from you in the future (should this in fact be the final chapter of this story), of which I'd be delighted to see something like that aforementioned spin-off. While I feel that this chapter didn't live up to the stage you'd set in the ones leading up to it, it was still a delightful read overall and worthy of a 4.5* rating in my book. Seeing as there's no option for that, a 5 will have to do. If you do happen to read this comment, I'd like to make a couple suggestions for your future works - take what you will from them:

1. Please include a definitive "The End" or some such at the end of your future stories rather than some ambiguous ending. If this chapter isn't actually the last one we'll see of Sibyl Speaks, I'd say to refrain from using lines with such finality like the last one in this chapter that could be inferred to signal the end of your story.

2. Don't rush your work, no matter what is happening around/to you. While this may or may not have happened here, I can't help but feel that this chapter was somewhat of a rushed product to reach a conclusion. Sometimes you may just not be feeling the story you started out writing is going in the direction you wanted. From my experience, I'd say that this isn't an indication that you should push through writing your story like you're slogging through muck, but rather that you should take a break from that story to let your mind get back into a greater state of perspective to what you want to put into your work in the long haul. Don't be afraid to take a step back from a story to write something else entirely unrelated, so long as you know you will come back to finish what you originally started. A work of art finished three weeks past its expected finish date is much better than whatever your mind could dredge up today, essentially.

That's about it from me. Thanks so much for dedicating your time to creating this story. It had been a blast to read, and you've created an avid reader of all your future work here in me.

-Ex-

I enjoyed Sibyl's story a lot more before it was explicitly stated to be part of the "Goddesses" universe that you keep running with. This installment abruptly ended a storyline that easily had a lot more possibilities for continuing content without the involvement of hokey Astro-X, creepy Alene, or worst of all, the craptastic character turn of Lucia.

Have to admit, I kinda agree with Dazboot in that the sudden explicit linking with the Goddesses stuff, and Lucia's abrupt abandonment, were pretty disappointing to read. I was really enjoying this story, and then to have so much stuff suddenly crammed in and then the whole thing abruptly ending was a big disappointment.

I’m thankful for them… for a couple reasons.

These constructive criticisms regarded my story, not the smut, implying that that is what people are returning to my stories to see. That pleases me immensely. Though I’m disappointed to realize that I failed to deliver (more on that is coming) I am truly flattered that my story and characters have enough value for readers to speak up when I stumble.

What you've said is spot-on true. I realize now that I was rushing for a conclusion instead of letting the story follow its course. The way it ended isn't up to my personal standards. I will be removing the offending chapters and resubmitting the edited story chunk, then returning to work on Listen... until I can bring it to a proper finish. It might take a while!

With that said I will not be changing the plot, much. I stand by every development and device!

Thank you to any who offer me constructive criticisms. It’s crucial.

I think that people need to understand that you were winging this story from the beginning. I dont see anything really wrong with it. It is a sex story after all and I found the sex in it to be some of the best you ever did. Dont edit it too much

Before anything else, i was super excited to see the new chapter, and love your work. However I must agree that one, the rushed ending was a minus, the true turn off for me was the quick parting of Lucia, and the NTR scene of her return, and just smashing her pregnancy and willingness to be a drifting fuck toy, in our faces. I was honestly upset with Lucia and wished ill on her until I calmed a little. I was also put off a bit by the fact "goddess' were so trite and condescending towards our team, no family reunion, just an immediate need to use them. I'd like to close by saying that my blatent venting is fueled by love of your writing and ur characters. Please don't be discouraged or stop.

Diana always has the best sex

@the5amClub

Yeah. Diana is always first choice when it comes to something particularly wild!