All Comments on 'Liz'

. . Mike was in Room 611 with Ellie all night.

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Does that change your feelings about them all?

One cheating wife and two cheating friend. This couldn't be worst.

She has been cheating with mike for along time and yes they were together all night.

The way Ellie went to a movie... she could have stayed home. During the swap they were in the same house. Why would she want to leave? What happened to the idea of Ellie and Liz playing? Threesomes? It seemed that Ellie had a lot of reasons to stay home.

Then, he finds out Ellie did not go to a movie. He is surprised when Ellie doesnt come home at the appointed time. Wouldnt she want to get back to reclaim her hubby? Insteead, we find out Ellie is at a hotel. She is ok with hubby fucking Liz all night. How generous. Why did Ellie not volunteer that info first? She tells him only when he wonders why she is not home. Also. why does he not suggest Ellie come home and join in? They could still sneak Liz to the hotel in the AM? She did not need to sleep in the hotel, she just needed to use the room as a cover story for Liz.

The cover story is to tell Mike that Ellie and Liz partied too much and got a hotel room. Wait. Partied too hard? At a movie? If my wife went to a movie with a girlfriend and texted me she was staying in a hotel due to excess drinking, I would be pissed and suspicious. I would IMMEDIAELY call her to verify. Then, I would make the 10 minute drive and go get her or order her a freaking Uber if I were too drunk to drive. No way I would just think it was ok to spend the night in a hotel.

The texting to Ellie and Mike is so convenient. Why not call? Afraid they would figure out Mike was with Ellie?

Then, at five in the AM, Ellie sets up the whole way out. And surprise, Mike is up and responds right away and is talkative. It only takes a few minutes to drive to the hotel, and Mike is suposed to pick up Liz at 7 for breakfast with Ellie. But Ellie doesn't get home until after 10. That's a three hour breakfast! Who spends 3 hours at Ihop?

Then when Ellie gets home: "Ellie showed up about ten. She came through the door looking more beautiful and full of life than I had seen her in ages."

Why was she so beautiful and full of life?? She spent the night in a hotel, with not a lot of sleep ( she was texting her hubby around 11 and was up fully by 5 am ). The logical assumption would be she was up all night fucking Mike or she just fucked him and Liz.

And we see Ellie and Liz are both fine with lying to Mike. Does that mean that they would also be willing to lie to Ellie's hubby?

The key exchange is when he texts to Ellie that it was a "devious plan" ( but he only knew half of just how devious ) and her response is " but one that works".

So, maybe the story was just what we read and Ellie slept alone. It seems unlikely.

Also why did Ellie never discuss the obvious? How did she like her time with Mike? He was already fucking her twice when Liz stopped them.

So, here is one reason to support the idea that Ellie was NOT with Mike... but, if she was, then this needs to be explained: Liz made it sound like sex with Mike was not that good. She implied sex with the main character was mind- blowing. Hell, they levitated! The next day, he fucked Ellie the same way, and they floated too! So, if Mike wasnt that good, and the MC is a sex guru, why swap? if Ellie did orchestrate this whole devious plan to spend the night fucking a mediocre lover, when Mr Mind Blowing was home, why??? If Mike wasn't good, why did Ellie come home looking so satisfied?

Again, maybe Ellie was alone. Will part 2 be from Ellie's POV?

Good story. More please.

KB

I love it, ellie with Mike all night in the hotel. Great comment!

Fun story to read, not much else to say. Lucky guy I guess.

The fact that Mike was awake at just after 5 am after earlier receiving the message around 12 to 12.30 about her staying in a hotel to answer those text messages with his wife,Liz, was a tad suspicious. Plus the whole scenario of Ellie saying she didn't go to the movie and had booked into a Hotel. Also, Breakfast at 7am and takes 3 hours? before Ellie arrives home. Did they even have breakfast?

So many red flags going off, all concentrated on Ellie saying she "owed" her husband.

Well I thing she conspired with Mike to give Liz another chance while Ellie and Mike bonked themselves silly at the hotel and maybe more once Liz arrived at 6 am?.So 4 hours with no explanation.

Just as obviously Ellie and Mike fucked all night at the hotel and have had an affair for a while. Not so obvious is what Ellie, Liz and Mike did at hotel for so long.

The plot was ok and characters barely developed. Floating during sex makes me suspect author uses drugs while writing. That emotional connection might happen with one woman. The second time with Ellie cheapened the time with Liz and makes the story silly.

Mike and Ellie have been having a long affair and Lisa is starting to realize it. Next chapter, please!

And the narrative was sloppy and unclear. Nothing entertaining about this mess.

Tedious swapping crap. Why would someone want to do that and be married

and it was all planned aforehand. That uncertainty lowers the score of the well written tale one star, to 3*.

Sooo they made Texmex for dinner when anal was on the table? A bit juvenile on my part but I couldn't get past it lol.

The story set-up created a challenge because there was no character development at all. Nevertheless, I like the fact that the story addressed the very real issue of combating jealousy. No matter how much you think about it in advance and how certain you are that jealousy will not be an issue... for most it will be an issue. Since my husband had shared me with several guys before I shared him with my girlfriend it seemed only fair that he should have some variety if I was having sexual variety. It did not seem to bother me the first few times but last winter my girl friend and her husband joined us on vacation and we did some swapping. But then my husband and my girlfriend went into 'honeymoon' mode. They were going at it like rabbits and spending long hours together doing things during the day. Her husband did not seem to mind having the extra time with me but for the first time I felt jealous and had to work through those feelings. So stories like this one are helpful to couples that are considering the concept of sharing and swapping.

Poor writing. Unlikable bland characters. Errors everywhere.

Option 1.

Things were as stated by the story.

Liz enlisted Ellie to give her a night with Andrew. Ellie went to a movie and slept at a hotel to give her husband as full experience as possible. Points to loving wife Ellie.

The question about breakfast taking 4 hours still remains...

Option 2.

Still the patiently negotiated intention, just a retry with separate locations instead of separate rooms.

The problem is Ellie and/or Liz unnecessary played Andrew with the complicated plot to fool Mike about needing a hotel room. Andrew would easily have accepted, "Ellie wants to try again, but this time I'll go to Mike and Liz will come to you." No hotel room, no movie needed. So why the con?

Option 3a.

Ellie seized an opportunity to cheat on Andrew, and the hotel/breakfast plan was hatched. It doesn't matter if Liz called Ellie first, or Ellie called Liz first with the ideal.

Mike was guilted or argued into Liz and Andrew having a night together with Ellie's approval. Mike agreed not to question Liz about the concocted hotel room justification for Liz gone all night.

Somehow Ellie declined the offer Mike undoubtedly made for them to overnight at Mike's house, so he "took one for the team" home alone.

At 5AM, Ellie was telling her unidentified lover to have a quick last fuck and hit the road. Perhaps she called Mike to make sure he was awake to text with Liz.

Option 3b.

Mike and Ellie set up a con to let themselves cheat with others.

Mike had his lover at the house, Ellie had hers at the hotel. Mike pushed Liz toward "apologizing" to Andrew to hook the mark, and the breakfast was the blow-off.

With either variation, Liz and Andrew will eventually be asking themselves questions per KingBandor...

So the question becomes, is Ellie an evil cheating kniving slut who has been playing around on Andrew for a long time? (And how far down the road to perdition is Mike?)

Was the original swap Ellie's attempt to "loosen Andrew up" so she could take lovers openly? Is she afraid to ask for a hall pass? Does she think she can't successfully continue cheating?

Or, is Ellie a loving ethical trustworthy spouse staying in sync with her spouse as they explore in their marriage?

It's just a story. Fiction. No before and no after. Read it again. Mike's wearing a wife beater. Mike and Ellie are on round two before Liz and Andrew are even started. There's Liz's comment that Mike never takes time for foreplay, and you have Ellie's comment in the last line. Mike is a slam/bang/thank you ma'm kind of guy and Ellie wants no more of him.

Thanks for the comments. They always help.

Yes, we readers like internal consistent stories, and like to analyze any ambiguities. So many writers leave so much to think about!

In the best stories, the writer works out a plan, leaving clues and implications like a mystery. Their product is multilevel and grows with re-reading.

Unfortunately, many writers are a bit slap-dash or are so enamored with their story that they can't imagine any reader not seeing the exact same mental picture showing in their brain while the words are written. Feedback from readers with different vision cause dissonance.

(And then there are writers who intentionally work to drive analysts crazy. Wheels within wheels!)

Hitch (a film director) was always very careful about his storyboard and the scenes he shot. His goal was only one rational way to splice the takes together into a meaningful story -- a story portrayed exactly as he intended.

In particular, what could extend a breakfast for almost 3 hours after Mike's 7am arrival? Maybe Liz's debriefing was most extensive... Not sure how much Mike would be into the philosophy of out of body experience.

Thanks wajahiii for keeping my head busy. I trust you to take this as a complement and a sign of the enjoyment your writing gives.

I think we all read these stories these days looking for the moment a wife or husband cheats on the other or plays them for a sucker. Or worse turns their hubby in to a cuck.

So many women cheat on their husbands these days its almost accepted that they all do at one time or another. So the story inconsistencies took us to paranoia universe. If that happened to you, you are not alone.

Twisted,.swapping story with absolutely nothing interesting.happening.

Not my cup of tea so to say, people commit themselfs to one another and don't play around if you don't want the commitment don't get married, nothing erotic about screwing someone that is not your spouse.

The three of them are complicit in Liz being unfaithful to Mike who, ironically, is the only character who did nothing wrong. Why does the author wish to celebrate being an adulteress and disloyal friends?

Sounds like Mike is odd man out. Sucks to be him