Loneliest Man Who Ever Lived Ch. 05

********

[THE PAST]

Harry was excited when he finally graduated high school. It wasn't a moment too soon. Harry had thought college would be different. He thought the humans there would be more mature, more intellectual.

Was he ever wrong.

Harry went to Yale, and was surprised to find nearly the same kinds of people he had known in high school. Athletes concerned with the movements of the ball. Girls concerned with attracting boys. Boys and girls who pretended to be intellectual, but all they tended to do was regurgitate whatever their professors told them, like parrots. And even their professors didn't understand the implications of their own indoctrinations.

As a result, Harry once again felt lonely. It was an enormous letdown. He had expected to find kindred spirits in college. He met some students who were very smart, but they were smart in their own narrow area, like the sciences. They weren't life smart. Whenever Harry opened his mouth, he once again quickly found himself isolated.

Harry decided to major in biology and biochemistry. He wanted to study the human life form more closely, to understand how it worked. But even as he began to understand the biological mechanics of this life form, it gave him very little insight into how their minds worked.

Every Friday night Harry would watch the ritual where humans would transform into animals. They would drag enormous kegs of beer into their rooms. They would turn off all the lights. They would turn on music very loudly. Then they would drink beer and try to talk, or yell, very loudly over the music. And then, presumably, some of them would procreate.

The next morning the only evidence of their debauchery would be the sticky steps of the stairwells where people had spilled their beer.

Harry didn't know for sure what went on in these parties, because he was never invited and wouldn't have gone if he had been. Instead, he spent his Friday nights walking from campus to campus, staring up at the stars. Standing there, in his silvery spacesuit, he felt more at home in the stars than he did among the humans.

Harry did make a friend of sorts at Yale. His name was Dack Huobang. Dack was studying electrical engineering. He didn't talk much, but he viewed humans, the other humans, as different entities too. They would sit up late into the evenings and talk about their observations about life.

After Harry graduated, he decided to get a masters degree and Ph.D. at Harvard in biochemistry. Dack went to Texas A&M to get an advanced degree in electronics. He assured Harry that they would keep in touch, that they would always be friends.

Harry never heard from Dack again. He never called Harry once. When Harry called him, Dack spoke to him, but Harry could tell it was without any enthusiasm. Finally, after the third time Harry called him, when he heard long periods of silence on the other side of the line, Harry realized that their friendship was over. He remembered the Rule of Gary.

The people in Harry's Master's program at Harvard were very smart when it came to biochemistry, but not much else. In Harry's estimation they had practically zero personality. They were a little like robots, although Harry imagined that real robots would have been more interesting to talk to.

But there was one person who caught Harry's eye, a fellow student named Erica Calley. She was always smiling at Harry in classes. The more she smiled, the more nervous Harry got, but finally he smiled in return. And then the day came when Erica sat next to him in class, and said, "Now we don't have to look at each other across the room, do we, Harry?"

They started having lunches together. Erica thought Harry was cute, and interesting, and also odd, in a way she couldn't quite put her finger on. She would often subtly prompt Harry into asking her out on dates. "Do you know any good movies to see tonight, Harry?" she would ask. Or "I'd love to try that restaurant in Harvard Square, but I don't know anyone to go with." Even Harry got the message (eventually), and they started dating.

He found her attractive, and smart, and things progressed from there. After Harry didn't kiss her on the first or second date, Erica frowned at the end of the third date and said, "I can see if I want to get anywhere with you, Harry, I'm going to have to do it myself." And she reached out and kissed him.

Harry felt himself hugging her as they kissed. He liked it. He had been afraid to kiss her because of the Rule of Onnika, but since Erica initiated the kiss, he found it worth the risk, and he kissed her back.

One thing led to another, and three dates later they were fooling around on Erica's couch. Erica had figured out by now that she had to take the lead if she wanted anything physical from Harry, and she methodically set out to seduce him. Soon they both had their clothes off and were kissing and touching. Erica worked Harry with her hand and quickly made him hard.

"Put it in me, Harry," she whispered, looking into his eyes. "I need it so bad."

Harry, feeling very nervous, shifted up and plunged into her. But he didn't get very far. He looked down. His penis was embedded in her thigh.

Erica, looking disgusted, lifted and aimed his penis. "Now, Harry."

Harry smoothly and easily slid inside of her. It felt like magic. He was inside a female of the species! Erica was smooth and slick and warm. He found himself slowly embedded in her. He marveled at the sensations.

"It works even better if you move, Harry."

Harry started to thrust back and forth. He made moaning sounds. He went faster and faster. Within moments his organ exploded, shooting inside of her.

He panted, gasping. He had done it. He had copulated with a human female. If she was ovulating, he might even have fertilized her eggs. He felt very masculine. Very powerful.

Harry he looked up at Erica. "How was that?"

Erica assured him that it was fine. And now wasn't the time late, and shouldn't he be getting back to his dorm room?

Harry never saw Erica again. He tried to understand what had gone wrong, but he couldn't. He simply didn't have enough data to theorize. All he could think of is that before he had sex with Erica, he had a relationship with her; and after sex, he had none. From that he learned the Rule of Erica: sex ended relationships.

********

Goldie took her parent's advice to heart and calmed down once she went to college. At Wesleyan, she only had three boyfriends for her entire four years. She realized that sex wasn't dramatically different from man to man. She instead sought out the ideal mate.

Her first boyfriend was Bruce. Bruce was on the soccer team, and had legs that Goldie could die for. Goldie loved watching his muscular thighs as he pumped in and out of her. His ass was hard as a rock as she clasped onto it while they recreated together. But Bruce wasn't much for talking. His conversational skills were... minimal.

So her sophomore year she traded Bruce in for Michael. Michael was majoring in political science and was always talking. At first, it was interesting, but soon, it became wearying. Goldie learned that there was a difference between quantity of conversation and quality.

So in her junior year Goldie found a man, Stephan, who was both smart and interesting. Stephan was an abstract art painter. He was extremely interesting to talk to. Very good in bed too. But Stephan had a downside. He was often moody, and pouting. The longer Goldie was together with him, the more she saw this unhappy side to him. Their relationship didn't last through the school year.

Finally in her senior year, Goldie did the unthinkable, and had an affair with Alyssa Goldberg. Alyssa had been giving Goldie half-lidded looks for months. One time she saw Alyssa peering into her shower stall while she was bathing. Goldie knew she was interested.

So one Friday night Goldie came to Alyssa's room with a bottle of schnapps and figured that that was all that was needed. She was right. Very quickly the two were kissing and rubbing each other. Before long they were naked, and fingering each other's clitorises.

"Do you like this?" Alyssa asked.

"Yeah," said Goldie. "But I kind of miss...."

"Miss what?"

"The feeling of being filled, you know? By a penis," said Goldie. Goldie was always blunt about her needs.

"I'm way ahead of you," said Alyssa. She put a black leather strap around her waist. In the middle of it was an equally black phallus.

"What's that for?" Goldie asked.

"I'll demonstrate," said Alyssa. She smiled wickedly at Goldie as she lubricated it, especially at the tip.

"That's how you... that's how lesbians....."

"Uh huh," said Alyssa, getting above her.

"You're not putting that in me!" said Goldie.

"Just try it. Just an inch," said Alyssa. Before Goldie could protest, she had pressed it against her nether lips. Goldie gasped as it was inserted. First an inch. Then two inches. Then all of it.

Goldie's eyes went wide. Alyssa started to pump it in and out of her. Goldie started to enjoy it, a little. But she had had too many penises inside of her to enjoy this. This was so stiff, so artificial, so unlifelike. It was like making love to a giant candle. She faked an orgasm just to get Alyssa off of her.

"Here, now you do me," said Alyssa, as she unstrapped the device.

*********

And so Goldie stayed single for most of her senior year. Most of the good men were taken anyway.

Wesleyan bored Goldie. She majored in art history, figuring she would get to look at pretty paintings, but never imagined how boring her professors could make the subject. She found herself staring into space during class times, or staring at boys.

A new thought occurred to her. Maybe the new experiences she craved were not sexual in nature. Maybe she needed other kinds of physical stimulation.

She took up downhill skiing.

Water skiing.

Motorcycling.

Roller coasters.

Parachuting.

Anything involving speed. It gave her an adrenalin thrill, for a while.

But like everything else, she soon got used to it.

Goldie spent her summers travelling across the world. At first, she was fascinated by the foreign cultures, the different foods and languages. The summer of her freshman year she saw London, Paris, Prague, and Rome. They were incredible. The second summer, she went to Berlin, Innsbruck, Madrid, and Athens, which were really nice. But the third summer she spent in Australia, Bali and Japan was... all right.

She didn't travel abroad for her fourth summer.

Her father tried to talk some sense into her. "Life is not about travel, or sleeping with many people."

"Then what is life about, Father?" she asked, twirling her dark blonde hair.

"It's about finding your place. The thing you're good at. The thing you enjoy."

"But I don't know what that is," said Goldie.

"You will," said her father.

Sunday

Harry worked feverishly on the equation. It made no sense to him. There were just too many unexplained variables. The more he worked on it, the more frustrated he became.

"Don't let yourself get so worked up about it," said Carl. "You know you're approaching the end of the line. She said herself that this is the final test."

"But at least I can get one more date out of it. One more chance to see her!" said Harry, writing frantically as he tried to reformulate the equation. No, it still didn't make sense to him.

"You're going to have to break it off sooner or later, Harry. You let yourself get too involved."

"I didn't have a choice," said Harry. He knew that Goldie had ulterior motives. But he was attracted to her nonetheless.

********

"I gave him the last equation yesterday, sir," said Goldie, as she sat in front of the holoprojector.

"Good. Have you been bringing him along?"

"Yes sir," said Goldie.

"Do you think he will respond favorably to our offer?"

Goldie thought about Harry's insistence that he would not work for The Foundation. Then she thought about how he had cried real tears after they lay together on the grass in Central Park, tenderly caressing each other. "I think so, sir."

"Keep me informed." His image faded.

Goldie looked at herself in the mirror. She felt an unfamiliar tension in her chest. Could she be developing real feelings for Harry? When they had been laying in the park together, side by side, touching each other, she had felt lust, to be sure. But love?

Goldie didn't know. She didn't even know what love really was. All she knew was that if Harry didn't solve the last equation, Harry wouldn't be the only one to endure a painful breakup.

********

[THE PAST]

After college, Harry gave up on his Ph.D in biochemistry. Technically, he had completed the requirements in a year and a half, but his advisor refused to accept his thesis.

"Technically this is superb," said Professor McGillicuddy. "But you haven't put the time in."

"I haven't needed to put the time in," said Harry. "I learned what I came here to learn."

McGillicuddy sighed. "Harry, what would happen if word got out that we were giving out Ph.D's in less than two years?"

"More people would be encouraged to apply for them?"

"That's true, Harry, but also Ph.D.'s themselves would be devalued. No, Harry, if you want a Ph.D., you have to spend at least five years in research."

Five years was an eternity to Harry, so he gave up. He spend two more years studying on his own, learning more about computers, mathematics, and biology than most people learned in 20. Harry had an eidetic memory; he remembered everything he saw. He processed information much more rapidly. He could read a thick textbook within two hours. More importantly, he could understand it, and think beyond it, considering things that were missing from it that should have been expanded upon.

His mother nagged him to get a job. She said he had to be self sufficient if he wanted to attract a girl. She had a point. He needed to be self sufficient. Harry got a job at a biotech company which was researching a drug which could potentially eliminate arthritis. He found the concept interesting... but he quickly found the work boring. Harry's job was to prepare the protocols for clinical trials. When he learned that there would have to be five years of trials before the drug could be approved, he quit.

But before he quit, he made a new friend. His name was Boris. Harry enjoyed having discussions about theories of biochemistry with him. Boris had an engaging mind. They went out to lunch a number of times and Harry enjoyed his company. When Harry quit his job, he and Boris exchanged numbers and promised to keep in touch.

Harry never expected to hear from Boris again. He was right.

But one person he did keep in touch with after he quit was Alexandra.

Alexandra, his new girlfriend.

After his catastrophic experience with Erica, Harry was doubly shy about having sexual relations with another woman. A woman who worked in data analysis at the biotech company where Harry briefly worked was attracted to him. Her name was Jennifer Turley and she and Harry went out several times, but Harry never so much as kissed Jennifer. He remembered the Rule of Onnika; a kiss would spell the end of things. Jennifer, annoyed with Harry's apparent platonic nature, dumped him.

But Alexandra McCall gave Harry more of a chance. They had met at a company outing. She thought Harry was handsome and viewed his shyness as a welcome challenge. Two dates later in a movie theater she was exploring his body in the dark as they sat watching an action thriller. Harry found her hands more exciting than the movie. And then she turned his head and kissed him on the lips, and Harry forgot about the movie entirely.

Alexandra was under no illusions that Harry would be the one to initiate sex with her so, after several dates of seeing no movement in that direction, she invited him over for dinner. It was there that Harry learned the first of two rules of Alexandra.

The First Rule of Alexandra is that when a woman invites you over for dinner, you are going to have sex.

The Second Rule of Alexandra Harry was to learn, tragically, a few weeks later.

Harry and Alexandra had sex. Harry tried to do the best he could. Alexandra, mistaking him for a virgin, tried to help him. She told him where to put it, when to put it, and how to put it. Under her direction he became a very pliable piston in her engine. She told him to speed up or slow down as needed. Before long, to Harry's great delight, she groaned and her chest turned red and she collapsed back into her pillow, mere moments after Harry had climaxed.

And then Harry watched and waited. He didn't dare ask how the sex was. He just lay there with her, waiting for her to tell him to leave.

Alexandra did give him a hint, an hour later, as she hugged and kissed Harry, that it was time for him to go, and Harry suspected that was the end of it.

But then Alexandra called Harry a few days later, and after going out for dinner, they went back to her apartment, and had sex again!

Harry was amazed. This was the first time he had had sex twice with the same woman. He loved the feeling of her body. He loved pressing his chest against her breasts. He loved coming inside of her. Alexandra wasn't as smart as Harry, not nearly so, but after years of loneliness, she was like a life preserver at sea.

But then, after the third time they had sex, Harry made his fatal mistake. He felt smitten with her. He realized Alexandra by far was not his intellectual equal, but he had been so very lonely, for so long. And so after they were lying in bed, arm in arm, he looked at her, and murmured, "I love you."

"What?" said Alexandra. It was like she had been hit by lightning.

It was too late to take it back now. "I love you," said Harry. He immediately sensed he had said the wrong thing.

Alexandra looked up at the ceiling. "Harry, I like you... I enjoy you... but it's a little too soon for love." She looked at him and pat his hair. "Don't rush things, Harry. Everything will come in its own time."

"Of course," said Harry, feeling as if he had just dodged a land mine.

And that was the last time he ever saw Alexandra. She didn't return his calls or messages. And that lead Harry to the Second Rule of Alexandra: Never tell a woman you love her.

As he walked in Boston Commons, wearing his silvery spacesuit, and watching other couples walk hand in hand, he reflected on all his mistakes in life.

********

Right out of college, Goldie got a job in event planning. She thought it would be a great opportunity to meet people. She couldn't have been more wrong. Most of her work involved keeping track of a million tedious details: room reservations, food, special accommodations, invitations lists, and much more. She was so bored she quit in her first month.

Then she got a job working at customer service at a bank. She figured that would give her people contact as well. She was right, but it was the most boring kind of interactions. All people wanted to talk about was their bank accounts. Goldie had no interest in talking about that. She used the opportunity to flirt shamelessly with her clients. One of them, a man named Matias who was ten years her senior, rose to the bait and asked her out to dinner. Before long they were dating and soon after that were mattress dancing.

Matias was a wealthy... actually, Goldie wasn't quite sure what he did for a living. But he did have a lot of money, that she knew first hand. Matias took her out for dinners at fancy restaurants. He took her to concerts, and the ballet. He even took her on his yacht--a small yacht, but a yacht, nonetheless. Matias was tall, handsome, and dark haired, and good in bed.